Letter from Canada congrats Museveni

Dear President Yoweri Museveni,

I must admit. I admire your consistence, courage, and creativity. Anybody can hate or loathe you. Truth be told. You’re a master tactician who sees the future. Congrats on that. Though you’ve been in power for decades, you’ve always been ahead of time for decades. Who would think you’d easily and squarely trounce Bobi Wine without any chaos? I adore you because what transpired in my country last year has shown that you aren’t only a tactician but also a honest and a peaceful man per se.

          Now, let me say something about Canada where elections aren’t life-and-death matters. I see Canadians voting with the internet on. Canadian youths aren’t like African ones who waste time browsing and thereby abscond from voting. Methinks, for those who don’t understand why internet was turned off during elections, must know. It’s because you wanted them to go to vote instead of wasting their precious time browsing.

            I also congratulate Ugandans on peacefully voting for a visionary leader before and after elections. Tanzania must take a leaf from Uganda. For, during the voting period, you alluded to a rigging ploy, which indeed happened. Otherwise, you’d have won by 100%. I proudly applaud the Ugandan Electoral Commission on managing the exercise diligently. They made sure that you who poised to win won. I congratulate the UEC on distributing voting materials timely. There happened some glitches that didn’t adversely affect the quality of diligence, especially to an African country where punctuality and reality have never been important altogether.

I heard some ‘bad guys’ condemning your beloved son who warned them not to attempt to snatch your power. Don’t they know his name? What’d Muhoozi or the avenger do at such moment of truth? Congrats Gen. Muhoozi. Keep on tweeting. I honestly like your tweets.

             I must warn ‘Booby.’ Since you took power a few centuries, sorry, decades ago, you’ve proved to be a very truthful man. You say it as it is. Why did Booby and his hecklers easily forget how your avow of not letting power slink out of your safe pair hands? You fought for and liberated Uganda from Idi Amin. Thus, whoever seriously wants power must fight for it. You absolutely once said that you don’t work for anybody except for yourself. Ugandans understand this far too well. Remember? You said “I am not an employee. I hear some people saying that I am their servant; I am not a servant of anybody. I am a freedom fighter; that is why I do what I do. I don’t do it because I am your servant; I am not your servant. I am just a freedom fighter; I am fighting for myself” (Daily Monitor, January 27, 2017).

            In Canada, one runs for the public office to serve the people but not to serve himself or herself. What a foolish idea! You share one quality that those who run for public offices say their intentionality clearly. That said, in Canada, every public officer is an employee of the people. There’s no self-employment in Canadian politics. That’s how reckless our leaders are out here. 

            Another difference is that, in Canada, like Uganda, power comes by votes even though, in some circumstances, one must use the barrel of a gun. Why only through votes? Canada’s never been under stinking dictators like Amin whom you defeated. Like in Canada, Ugandans have truly proved. They know the type of ruler they need and why.

             I like how you’ve been clamorous and impervious throughout your rule. Uganda needs that. You consistently on countless occasions said that you’ll never allow Amin and the likes to return and destroy your gains. Who wants this? Again, those who don’t know this wrongly ask how and why Amin should return while he’s already dead. Yep. Amin died many years ago. Again, Aminism still exists. Whoever doubts this ‘truth truly said’, must ask TZs whom I heard sing Idi Amin Mama. Who know there can evolve one in Uganda?

            I recently heard Donald Trump of the US saying that he’d like Canada to be the US’ newest state after Greenland. Had Canada had a consistent person like you, this threat would have already been sorted out perpendicularly and mercilessly.

            In sum, I happily and honestly congratulate you and your family on your ‘avalanche’ victory. Museveni hoyeeee!

Source: Daily Monitor Sunday today.

Je, talaka inashangiliwa na kusherehekewa?

Japo inaweza kuonekana kama jambo la ajabu, siku hizi, kumeibuka fasheni au tuseme utaratibu wa baadhi ya watu kusherehekea talaka. Hili, kwa kizazi cha zamani, ni ajabu na jipya. Japo kusherehekea talaka kunaanza kuzoeleka baada ya kutangazwa sana mitandaoni, kiakili na kiuhalisia, kuna la kusherehekea na kushangilia katika talaka? Hili ndilo swali litakalotushughulisha leo.
Swali ambalo wengi wanaweza kujiuliza ni je, wahusika wanatuzunga kwa kutafuta umaarufu au kiki? Ni kweli wanafanya hivyo kutokana na furaha au kujiliwaza, kukomoana, hata changamoto ya afya ya akili?  Kwenye chapisho na Waite na wenzake (2002) la Does divorce make people happy?, walihitimisha kuwa kinachoitwa furaha ya kuachika si furaha bali mlinganisho wa masahibu aliyopitia mhusika na kuwa nje yake. Zimmermann na wenzake (2006) kwenye chapisho lao la Happily ever after? Cohabitation, marriage, divorce, and happiness in Germany walifanya utafiti nchini Ujerumani. Walihitimisha kuwa maisha ya ndoa huleta furaha na ridhiko na talaka ina athari hasi.
  Je, talaka, hata kwenye dini zinazoruhusu, ni jambo la furaha au huzuni? Anajibu Waziri wa Maendeleo ya Jamii, Jinsia, Wanawake na Makundi Maalumu, Dk Dorothy Gwajima “kikawaida ndoa ni jambo la heri na furaha, na talaka ni jambo la huzuni, ambalo haitarajiwi.”
 Je, wahusika wanakuwa na ndoa za kupanga ili zitakapovunjika wafanye sherehe na kupata wanachodhamiria? Je, zinakuwa ndoa za kweli walizoingia bila maandalizi au kwa kufuata vitu fulani ambapo wakivikosa, wanavunja ndoa na kusherehekea kujitoa kwenye kifungo cha kujitakia?
 Tukio lilotangazwa hivi karibuni nchini ni pale mama mamoja jina hatutaji, alipoarika watu kusherehekea kuachika. Hapa, pia, kuna mashaka na maswali; kwa sababu mhusika anaelezea kuwa ameachika mara tatu.
Tuzidi kudurusu. Ukitaarifiwa msiba wa ndugu ya jirani yako na ukakuta kuna sherehe na si matanga, utafanya nini? Utajenga dhana na kutoa hitimisho gani? Je, binadamu tunaanza kubadilika hadi kushabikia na kusherehekea misiba na majanga?  Kusema ukweli, ni vigumu kujua msukumo na sababu vya kufanya haya zaidi ya kutaka kiki au kukomoana kwa walioachana. Je, inawezekana wanaosherehekea, kama kweli walikuwa kwenye ndoa, ndiyo chanzo cha kuvunjika ndoa zao? Je, ni tangazo kuwa wanaotaka kuchukua mzigo wachukue au kuhalalisha mipango iliyofanyika nyuma ya pazia ambapo mtalaka hujenga mazingira ya kufanikisha kuishi na yule aliyemtaka na kusababisha kuvunja ndoa yake?
Turejee mfano wa msiba. Ukikuta mtu anashangilia na kusherehekea msiba wa ndugu yake, zaidi ya kujenga dhana kuwa ndiye muuaji, nini zaidi unaweza kudhania? Ajabu, wanaoonyesha kusherehekea talaka ni wanawake. Yupo mwanamke mkenya aliyepata umaarufu kuwa kutangaza na kueneza fasheni hii kiasi cha kuwa chanzo kizuri cha kumuingizia fedha tokana na TikTok kumlipa kwa kuwa na wafuasi wengi. Hatujaona sherehe ya kuacha iliyoandaliwa na mwanamme.
Japo bado ni mapema kutoa hukumu dhidi ya utamaduni huu mpya, tukiri. Lazima kuna tatizo fichi na kubwa. Kama jamii, tuikabili changamoto hii ili taasisi ya ndoa isibomolewe tokana na malengo na matendo ya watu wachache wenye ajenda fichi. Maana, si kawaida binadamu kupigwa akacheka badala ya kulalamika na kulia au kupata hasara akasherehehekea. 
Tumalizie na ushauri wa Dk. Gwajima aliyekaririwa akisema “wataalamu wa masuala ya ndoa, saikolojia, mahusiano, migogoro na wengine kuja na tamko baada ya kuitafiti changamoto hii ili kuepuka kuwavutia vijana wakaishia kusababisha hatari kwa ndoa zao. Kwani, bila ndoa, hata kama siku hizi watu wanaweza kuzaa nje ya ndoa, hakuna taifa. Na kama lipo hasa likitokana na utaratibu wa nje ya utaratibu uliokubalika, litakuwa ni taifa la hovyo na hatarishi.
Baadhi ya mambo ni ya kudurusu na kufikiria kwa makini na si kufuata mkumbo.

Kwa wengi, hasa wanaofunga ndoa zisizo na vipengele vya kuachana kirahisi kama wakristo, talaka haishangiliwi wala kusherehekewa. Ni msiba na bahati mbaya kwa walio wengi. Je, nini husababisha kusherehekea talaka? Mbali na utamaduni na malengo ya wahusika, si rahisi kutoa jibu moja au mawili.

Chanzo: Mwananchi J'pili leo.

Nisameheni mafyatu waliotekwa na kupotezwa

Kwa ndugu zangu wapendwa mliofyatuliwa,
 Nawakumbuka sana nisameheni bure. Nawakumbuka akina Ali Kibaooo, Mdudu Nyangarika, Hamp Slowslow, Saa Eight et al. Naomba mzingatie haya. Kama mko hai, mtafurahi na kufarijika kuwa bado mnakumbukwa. Kama mshafyatuliwa, wapendwa wenu watayasoma na kuyahifadhi kwa ajili yenu. Nisameheni kuchelewa kuwasiiana nanyi.
Pia, niweka wazi. Nalaani jinai, unyama, na ukatili wa kutekana, kupotezana na kuuana. Japo wapo wanaofanya hivi kwa kisingizio cha kulinda kaya, kaya hailindwi kwa baadhi ya mafyatu kuwafyatua wenzao kana kwamba wao ndiyo wana hati milki ya kaya. Jinai hii ni mbaya kuliko unyama hata ushetani. Lazima tuilaani na kupiga vita hadi tuitokomeze kabla haijaangamiza kaya.
Kwa wanaongamiza wenzao tena kulinda madhambi na tamaa vyao wanapaswa waambiwe. Nao watakufa hata kama siyo leo. Wenzetu wanatucheka na kutushangaa tulivyo makatili na hayawani. Hatuwezi kuwa kaya huru lakini baadhi wakanyang’anywa HAKI ya kuishi. Hatuwezi kuwa huru ilhali huvumilii maoni na mawazo yanayopingana na yako. Tushindane kwa hoja na si viroja na unyama jamanini.
        Kwa waliofyatuliwa, kupotezwa, na kunyotolewa roho, siku nyingi zimepita tangu mfyatuliwe baada ya kufyatua na kutishia kuwafyatu waliowafyatua na kuendelea kutufyatua mafyatu wasiofyatuka wakafyatua hadi wakawa siku zote wanafyatuliwa kirejareja tena na mazwazwa. Najua. Familia zetu zinaumia na kuteseka kwa sababu ya unyama wa mafyatu wachache wanaotenda kama vile wataishi milele. Kila kitu tunakikuta na tutakiacha. Hata uteke, upote na uue namna gani, hutamaliza mafyatu. Wengine watazaliwa na kukupinga tu. Hata ujihadae vipi, kuondoa uhai wa fyatu mwenzako utakuandamana na ukose amani na raha hata ufiche au kujifanya hayakuhusu vipi. Akina Hitler, Amin, Mussolini, Pol Pot na manyang’au wengine walifyatu mafyatu kwa mamilioni. Wako wapi?
        Kwa wahanga, msikonde. Sir God anawaona watesi wenu. Japo siku hizi HAKI ni machukizo kwa baadhi ya wenzetu, kuna siku siku HAKI itatendeke. Kama Sir God ataahirisha kuwafyatua, atatuliza tu ila si kuzuia. Zao zaja. Kwani, damu yenu itaamka na kulipiza kisasi kama si kwao, basi, kwa vizazi vyao. Kwa taaluma na uzoefu wangu kama profesa emeritus, wote waliojifyatua akili nao roho zao haziko sawa. Wanaungua bila kusema wala kunung’unika waziwazi.

        Nyuma ya pazia, wanaungua na kuumia. Kuna moto unawachoma taratibu. Mateso yao hayapimiki. Wanaishi kwa hofu na wasi wasi.
Wapendwa, hamjasahaulika wala kupuuziwa. Mko, na daima mtakuwa, mioyoni mwetu kama mashujaa. Hamtasahaulika daima. Nani chizi awasahau au kujifanya hamkufyatuliwa? Japo hawapo wanaojitoa ufahamu na kutetea vitu badala ya ufyatu, niaminini. Hawatakaa waionje hiyo amani mawenge na uchwara wasingiziayo. Nahisi hasira na uchungu ninaposikia wadudu wakitaka kuhadaa mafyatu. 
        Yupo huyu mwehu aliyeko juu aitwaye Mkumbokumbo anayetaka mafyatu wafuate mkumbo na kuamini urongo na uzwazwa wake. Anadai mafyatu wanachukiwa kwa sababu ya ukwasi wao! Ukwasi upi na tangia lini? Nani anafaidi huu ukwasi uchwara ugawiwao kwa wenye akili tena kwa hongo za peremende? 
        Wamejua kututenda. Wamelikoroga, halafu wanadai tatizo si wao japo ni wao ila maadui wa kufikirika toka ghaibu! Ni uzwazwa kiasi gani? Hao wanaoshutumiwa kuwahonga njuluku mabarubaru aka mabeberu walianza lini kuwa maadui ilhali, siku zote, wamekuwa wakifadhili mafyatu hadi tukawaita wafadhili? Wakimwga njuluku zikapigwa bila kuhoji, wanaitwa wafadhili. Kama kweli ni mabeberu, inakuwaje nasikia umbea kuwa kuna jitihada za kutafuta washawishi na wapiga chapuo wawashawishi wasamehe mipayuko yenu? Kuna haja mafyatu wazima tuache utoto. Tuamue kusema ukweli. Haiwezekani wafadhili wetu wageuke mabeberu leo siyo jana. 
        Huwa sipendi kigeugeu na urushi. Kwanini wawe wafadhili wakinyamaza? Ajabu, wakifyatuka na kustukia gemu wakahoji, tunawaita mabeberu. Nani mabeberu kati ya wao na wale warongo, wabangaizaji, na wasanii watapatapao. Kama ubeberu ni jinai, waliofyatua mafyatu wetu ndiyo mabeberu. Uzuri wa ‘mabeberu’ hawauia wala kuibia mafyatu wao. Isistoshe, sisi siyo mbuzi majike? Kwa mafyatu, mabeberu si tishio. Wakija, tunawachinja na kuwageuza kitoweo saaafi kama kweli wapo.
            Huwa nashangaa sana mabeberu wanapoiwaita washitili wao mabeberu wakati mabeberu ni wao. Kama ubeberu ni kosa, mabeberu tunao Fyatuland wakitubeberu wakisingizia mabeberu wa kufikirika. Fyatu nakataa kata kata. Beberu gani anaweza kufyatua mafyatu tena wanaofyatuliwa kwa kuishi kwa kula ugali kwa pilipili? Kazi ya beberu ni kuzalisha majike na si kuua wana mbuzi. Kama kweli kuna mabeberu, wakija, wakamateni, wachinjeni lau tuondokane na ukame wa kukosa kiteweo. Chonde chonde waonye mabeberu. Mafyatu tutawafyatua na kuwageuza kitoweo.
Kama kweli maadui wa mafyatu ni mabeberu ninaowajua, hawana haja ya kulalamika bali kuwakamata na kuwafyatua. Kama si hao bali wao hao wanaodai kuna mabeberu wakati wao ndiyo wao hao, tuache kufyatuana kirejareja. Tuambizane ukweli na kuacha kujitoa ufahamu kwa kiherehere kama yule jamaa mbayuwayu.

Chanzo: Mwananchi J'tano leo.

Canada’s lesson to Africa’s unification

Many East Africans never actualised its profits individually and nationally. Why? Today, I’ll use Canada’s confederacy of ten provinces and three territories and its population of 41 million as one of the richest countries globally to show the lesson Africa can learn. Canada’s GDP is USD 2.3tn compared to Africa’s  GDP of USD 2.8tn with its population of 1.55 billion.
If Canada were divided into 13 countries, its economic clout would vaporise right away. It’d perilously and pointlessly give birth to trifling countries that’d burn billions of dollars on military budgets and purchasing weapons to protect themselves against their neighbours who happen to be Canadians as well. Imagine. How much the tiniest of all, Prince Edward Island with 182,657 homos, would throw away to fear-driven military expenditures just like African colonial-tailored states have always done? The upshot’s simple. If all African states could divulge their military budgets and those of their ever corrupt, extravagating, and thieving rulers, it’s obvious. They’ve what it takes to finance their own development and social services. 
        Arguably, Africa’s capable of improving our live if it can save billions of dollars burnt to colonially calculated divisions and fearmongering. This anomaly doesn’t need an ace mathematician to debunk. According to the World Bank (2020), Canada’s 2019 military expenditure stood at 1.3% of its GDP compared to ever-begging South Sudan 3.4% ; Uganda 2.1% ; Burundi 1.8%; Tanzania 1.3%; Kenya; and Rwanda 1.2%, which makes an average of 1.8% for the EAC, which 5 points higher than Canada.
        Apart from military expenditure, how many billions of dollars Africa spends on feeding its do-nothing Presidents and keeping its colonial borders safe? Surely, Africa’s what it takes to become a world economic supremo without begging as it currently is. There are those who may doubt the viability of such an anecdotal proposal due to the fear that Western countries won’t like the idea of unifying Africa. For how long will Africa feed on and internalise colonial fear?
        Rwanda’s once Francophone. After the 1994 genocide, Rwanda became Anglophone; and nobody stood in its way despite this not auguring well with France. Rwanda pressed on; and stood its ground. Again, for how long will Africans fear the West as if it’s their God? Methinks. We don’t fear God this much. We still commit sins. Let’s commit this sin of pragmatically and truly reuniting Africa commencing with the wobbly EAC. Let’s give it a try. For, we’ve nothing to lose except our shame and sufferings.
        Essentially, the fear of the unknown prevents Africa from being reunited to become stronger. Besides, our rulers’ fear, individuality, greed, and myopia are the major blockages. If Canada were divided, the democracy it enjoys would vanish. Single election would bankrupt the new countries. How much money would it burn on elections just like it’s been in slapdash and rigged elections that produce but just the same rotten and venal rulers?
        What’s more, by having their individual interests secured at the detriment of their future, African countries still blindly plot to use each other for individual interests and those of colonisers instead of working together for true emancipation. This can’t and won’t work. Commandeered in their paltry interests, African countries are comfortably divided among themselves, and their people based on rash and trivial things such as flummery and flummoxed sovereignty. That’s why countries with bigger land mass and voluminous resources have always been seen as a stumbling block to the unification of East Africa. Again, did these countries apply to be what they’re namely colonial-design structures? 
 Canada’s confederacy has big and small members. Comparably, Quebec is 62% of the East Africa but still coexists with the PEI, which is just 0.2 of the EAC just like Zanzibar that’s just 0.36 of the United Republic.
        I, for one, am an unflagging advocate of a single unitary Africa that’ll demolish faux borders and abolish divisions based on feeble and pseudo sovereignties. I’d like to see the current Presidents hitting the road to give room for one President of Africa or the EAC. If this happens, we won’t be complaining about the dictators that want to illegally die in power or suffering from their brutality and their private but public kept armies. For, without reunifying Africa to the tune of what it’s prior to 1884, all we’re cosmetically doing’s but feeding a black hole. Why’s it difficult to think as one nation instead of thinking like useless colonial-sired states we jealously protect for our peril? Call that the lesson from Canada. Hastas entonces.

Source: Daily Monitor Sunday today.

Wajue Wamosou ndoa zao za ajabu

Nchini China na Mongolia, kuna jamii ya watu waitwao Mosou. Ni watu wanaoshika mila kwelikweli. Baadhi ya mila zao hasa kuhusiana na ndoa, zinaweza kukuchanganya, kukushangaza hata kutisha. Kwanza, wao ni matrilineal, yaani, katika jamii hii, mtoto huchukua ubini toka upande wa mama na si baba kama kwetu na jamii nyingi duniani. Hii ni tofauti na dunia nzima ambayo ni patrilineal tokana na kuendeshwa na mfumo dume ambapo ubini wa mtu hutoka kwa baba na si mama. Mfumo wao ni mfumo jike haswa. Japo hapa Tanzania tumewahi kuwa na jamii za namna hii kama vile Wamakua, ambao pia hupatikana sana nchini Msumbiji utamaduni, huu ulikufa zamani.
       Hii, pia, ipo kwenye jamii za Wakikuyu na Wakamba wa Kenya. Mama akijifungua mtoto ambaye hamjui baba yake, humpa ubin wake. Hivyo, usishangae kusikia watu maarufu kama wanamuziki maarufu nchini Kenya kama Ken wa Maria au Kim wa Regina.
Wamosuo wajulikanao kama the Kingdom of Women au himaya ya akina mama. Kwao, mke na mume hawaishi pamoja kama tuishivyo sisi na wala wanaume hawawajibiki kisheria kutunza wala kumilki watoto waliowazalisha. Kila mmoja anaishi kwake na wanakutana au kuachana wakati wowote wanapotaka na kutafuta mwingine. Japo ni kawaida kukuta wawili waishio kama mke na mume, bado hii haiwazuii kuwa na washirika wa ndoa wengine nje ya ndoa hii ambalo ni jambo la kawaida linalofanyika na kukubalika katika jamii hii. Pia, hakuna idadi ya washirika katika uhusiano inayoruhusiwa wala kukatazwa bali suala na uamuzi binafsi wa wahusika.
Kwa vile safu hii ni ya masuala ya ndoa, leo, tutawaletea ndoa za ajabu za Wamusuo. Katika jamii, wanawake wana nguvu na ushawishi mkubwa juu ya familia na ndoa. Wanaruhusiwa kuwa na wanaume wengi kwa wakati mmoja na watoto wanaozaliwa tokana na mahusiano haya ni mali ya mama. 
Pia, jamii ya Wahimba ya kule Namibia inasifika kwa ukarimu kiasi cha mume kumruhusu mkewe kulala na mgeni kama ishara ya upendo na urafiki. Huu utaratibu unaitwa okujepisa omukazendu yaani ishara ya ukarimu na urafiki. Hata hivyo, mke anaweza kukubali au kukataa kulala na mgeni.
Tukirejea kwa Wamusuo, kama ilivyo kwa baadhi ya jamii na dini ambapo mwanaume anaruhusiwa kuwa na wake zaidi ya mmoja, kadhalika nao, mwanamke anaruhusiwa kuwa na wanaume zaidi ya mmoja na hakuna ugomvi.
Kwetu sisi wenye wivu, kuna jambo ambalo Wamusuo hawana. Nalo ni wivu wa mapenzi. Kwani, wanaweza kuwa na wivu wa kugombea uongozi au mali lakini si mapenzi! Mila na utamaduni huu vimewashangaza  wachunguzi na wasomi wengi wa mambo ya kijamii hasa baada ya kugundua kuwa katika jamii hii hakuna unyanyasaji wa kina mama au kina baba. Katika jamii kuna aina ya ndoa kuu inayojulikana kama walking marriage, zouhun, au ndoa inayotembea ambapo wahusika huwa na uhusiano wa kindoa wa muda. Mmoja au wote wakichoka au kuchokana, kila mmoja huacha kumtembelea mwenzake na kutafuta mwingine na mambo huishia hapo.
Katika jamii akina mama au daba, wana mamlaka makubwa juu ya mali na maisha ya familia. Akina mama huwarithisha mamlaka mabinti zao sawa nasi tunavyowarithisha watoto wetu wa kiume. Hii ni kutokana na ukweli kuwa wanawake wa Kimasuo huwa hawaolewi wala kuishi pamoja kama kwenye ndoa zetu ambapo wawili huwacha familia zao na kwenda kuishi peke yao na kuanzisha na kulea familia. Badala yake huwakaribisha wanaume kuishi na hata kuzaa nao na kila mtu kuchukua hamsini zake. Pia, katika mahusiano ya ndoa ya Kimasuo, hakuna umilki wa pamoja wa mali.
Cha mno, katika jamii hii hakuna kitu kinaitwa ndoa kama tukijuavyo ambapo wawili huingia mkataba wa kudumu kulingana na aina ya ndoa. Kwa Wamosuo, hakuna cheti cha ndoa au ulazima wa mtu kumganda na kuishi na mwenzake. Hivyo, yeyote anaweza kumchagua yoyote wakaishi kwa muda watakao na watakavyo. Hiyo ndiyo ndoa ya Kimasuo.

Chanzo: Mwananchi J'pili leo.

Tulaani na kundunisha udini wa kudunisha dini zetu

Fyatuland ina visa, visasi, vitimbi, vitimbwiliko usipime. Japo, tunaonyesha kuanyamazia na kuwashabikia, kuna mafyatu wanaofyatuka hovyo hovyo wakicheleta na kuchezea hatari wasijue zahama wanayotengeza. Wapo mafyatu uchwara waliojipa, sijui kupewa vibali vya ‘kuvuruga’ amani wakidai na kujifanya wanaitetea. Sijui nani huyu mchizani anayewatuma hawa wahuni, apate nini, na iwe nini? Nijuavyo, dini ni suala la kibinafsi. Inapoanza kugeuzwa suala la umma na kuanza kuuma umma, ujue mwisho na matokeo yake ni zahama kama siyo kiama tena vya kujitakia. Yote ni matokeo na kujipendekeza, kujikomba, njaa, na uzwazwa.

            Fyatuland haina dini ila madini kama urani(um) ya bwana nonihino bingwa wa kufyatuka fyatuka na kupayuka payuka  bila kufikiri. Sijui viumbe habithi kama hawa huwa wanajisikiliza au kusikiliza wale wanaowaonya. Linatoka fyatu, sijui baada ya kula ndumu au ulabu, linafyatuka na kutishia kukata mafyatu vichwa. Kwani, lenyewe halina kichwa au linacho ila cha panzi? Ajabu, hata mafyatu wenye heshima zao wanakubaliana na uduni na uhuni huu uliojifunika udini usio na lolote wala chochote bali kujitoa ufahamu na kuishiwa akili na busara. Ni aibu fyatu mzima kujifanya hamnazo na kufanya mambo ya kitoto halafu akataka aitwe mtu mzima! Mtu mzima au mtu mzima hovyo?

            Kwa taarifa yenu, dini, mikakati uchwara, njaa, na kujikomba kwenu havitufai wala hatuvihitaji. Kama wataka siasa, vua gwanda la udini duni, na uvae la siasa utie timu uwanjani tukuone, kukusikia, na kukusikiliza kabla hatujakulaani na kukudharau. Inakuwaje mafyatu hawa laanifu wanajifanya kutetea mafyatu wazima tena wenye power kana kwamba ni watoi wachanga? Hovyo kabisa. Mjue. Tunawajua na hata uhovyo na uduni wenu.

            Msitake kutifua historia chafu ya dini hasa zilivyosaidia kueneza ukoloni, na sasa, uzwazwa wa kuamini miujiza ya uongo vinavyowasumbua mafyatu wetu. Juzi, kaya jirani, ilifuta hizi dini duni kibao za kujipachika, kuchonganisha, na kuwaibia mafyatu. Mijitu yenyewe iliogopa umande. Ajabu, inajitia kujuajua wakati haijui kitu bali kuganga njaa na utapeli vya wazi. Je, nani aliwaroga mafyatu hadi baadhi yao wanafyatuka na kufyatua vitu vya hovyo na hatarishi bila kuwashikisha adabu?

            Japo si wote, tuna matapeli wengi wa kiduni aka gwajimmy et mashehetani sasa kuliko wakati wowote katika historia ya Fyatuland. Fyatu, tena tapeli na vivu la wazi, linaamka asubuhi na kujivisha vyeo vikubwa na vitakatifu. Ukiuliza limesomea lini, nini, na wapi, linaanza stori za Fyatu na Fyatuzi. Ho, nilikutana na Jizazi, mara hivi mara vile. Kumbaff kabisa. Muiache Fyatuland yetu. Ukisikia kuisha na kuishiwa ndiyo huku. Dingi zima linafyatuka vitu ambavyo hata machizi na wapiga ndumu wala walevi hawawezi kwa kuchelea aibu na kutiwa adabu.

            Hakuna kinanisononesha na kushangaza kama tunavyowavumilia waharibifu hawa waliojaa uduni waliojificha kwenye udini na uhuni uchwara. Tuwafichue, tuwalaani, kuwaonya, na kuwaadhibu kabla hatujaharibikiwa. Ukichanganya matapeli haya na siasa za majitaka, ndo usiseme. Leo, wanaweza kujifanya wanakupenda ilhali wakuponda ukahadaika usijue hawana tofauti na vyangudoa wa kawaida. Lao ni tonge hata wapewe na fisi au fisadi.

            Wapo wanaojifanya wanaipenda kaya wakati wanaichukia kwa machukizo wanayotenda. Wanapanua vinywa vyao vichafu na kufyatuka uchafu hadi wote tunaonekana wachafu na mataahira. Fyatu Mfyatuzi si mwoga wala taahira. Napanga kuomba kibali cha kuwashughulikia hawa matapeli hadi wakome na kukomaa kabla hawajatukomoa. Hawa ni ndumilakuwili au sigara kali. Inakuwaje fyatu zima linalojitia zimo kutetea amani tena ya imani na kusaza haki? Je, waweza kuwa na amani bila haki? Heri kuwa na haki kwanza. Kwani, italeta amani. Amani hata ifagiliwe na kulindwa vipi, haiwezi kushamiri miongoni mwa ubatili na ukosefu wa haki. Amani gani wakati mafyatu wanatekwa, kupotezwa, hata kunyotolewa roho? Amani gani wakati baadhi ya mafyatu wanapiga njuluku zetu, kuhomola, kuhondomola ilhali wakitubagaza na kutubananga?

            Sambamba na wanasiasa wenye visa na visasi wafyatukao bila mdomo na ubongo kuwasilishana ni kero na tishio kwa kaya yetu. Wapo walioshiba kiasi cha kutapika na kunonihino mle mle wanamolia utadhani mainzi mafu! Linakurupuka fyatu tena lenye maulaji makubwa na kuwasimanga mafyatu wachovu. Linaunda hila na uongo na kuwageuza mataahira wakati wana akili timamu. Kwani, hatuwajui wapigaji wetu? Kwani, hatujui hata rongorongo zao? Mbona kila kitu kiko wazi?

            Njaa haina mwisho hata uivalie kibwaya vipi. Njaa ni kansa inayosumbua Fyatuland ambapo wachache wanashiba ilhalil kaumu ikisota njaa. Halafu, linatokea zwazwa linasema eti tu matajiri kiasi cha matajiri na washiri wetu kutuonea wivu! Kwa visa, visasi, na uduni huu! Tulaani vikali na kudunisha udini duni unaotaka kudunisha dini na kaya yetu. Heri ya mwaka mpya.  Hapa natia nukta. Waktabahu, ila al-liqa.

Chanzo: Mwananachi leo J'tano.

           

Mfugo unapowaita mafyatu ‘mifugo'!

Juzi, nilifyatuka nusu kufyatua mkumbaff mmoja. Si nilisikia mfugo–––tena mkubwa tu–––unaopayuka kuliko hata aliyeufuga. Ulidai eti mafyatu wanaoishi ghaibu wanafugwa kama wenyewe. Nani, vipi, na kwanini? Huko, hawali dezo kama huu. Hawapigi, hawababaishi, wala kuongopa. Hakuna usanii, uchawa, ufunza, au ukunguni. Unawaita mafyatu waanimo kwa vile wewe ni muanimo? Nani afugwe iwe home au kisiasa? 

Ughaibuni, mafyatu wanabeba maboksi, kulipa kodi, kutuma dolari home. Hawapigi kodi za mafyatu. Hawakopikopi wala kubomubomu wala kupiga wapewacho. Hawashirikiani na wachukuaji waitwao wawekaji. Pia, hawana uchumi wanaoukalia kama mifugo inayowashutumu kuwa mifugo wakati si mifugo wa yeyote kama hii inayoibia mafyatu na kuwatumia kubomu na kupiga.
            Ughaibuni, hakuna ulevi wa maulaji ya dezo.  Kule kuna uchapakazi na uwajibikaji. Hakuna mifugo, wadudu, wala ulevi zaidi ya kupiga mzigo. Kama mafyatu wa ughaibuni ni mifugo, mbona wanawafuga mafyatu wa kayani hadi hao wanaoshiba na kunonihino kwa midomo wanawashawishi wawekeze kaya? Tangu lini aliyefugwa akafuga mbwa? Kuweni na aibu jamani.
            Kaya jirani, mafyatu wa ughaibuni wanaenziwa kama kuku watagao mayai ya dhahabu. Kwani, wanaingiza mamilioni ya dolari kwa kuwekeza au kuwatumia jamaa zao. Fyatuland, wanachukiwa hadi kuitwa mifugo ilhali wanaogopewa wasichukue fursa za walevi wa maulaji wasio na ubunifu wala ithibati na kujiamini kupambana nao kishua. Kwani, hatujui? 

        Unapoongea na mafyatu, ujikumbushe au kukumbushwa kuwa wana akili tena timamu na kubwa kuliko hata zako. Wengine ni wabukuzi wa kweli na mahiri kuliko hawa wa kuungaunga. Ughaibuni usishangae kuona mzoa taka akitinga kibaruani na ndinga kama mnene wa uswekini. Huko, kazi ni kazi si kuchagua kazi. Pia, hakuna ving’ora uchwara vya kujipendelea.
            Huwashangaa sana mafyatu wa hovyo wafugwao. Ukimpa doshi, anakuita mafadhili. Ukimfyatua ukamkosoa anavyofyatua na kutumia vibaya msaada ulichompa, anakuita beberu! Ebo! Tujitofautishe na mbuzi jike? Ukifugwa, usijidanganye kudhani wenzio wanafugwa. Ukiwa zwazwa, usidhani wenzio mazwazwa. Kama siyo Tunda Lishe, wengine sijui hata kama wangekanyaga hapo wanapopanonihino na kukufuria wasijue kacheo ni dhamana au koti mwilini.
            Heri mafyatu waishio ughaibuni wanaoweza kulisha mafyatu wa kayani kuliko wapigaji waishio kwenye mabega, migongo yao, wakiwatumia kubomubomu. Ukiwauliza kwanini wanaishi bure wakati wanaowatukana ndiyo wanaowalipia kuanzia kula, home, michuma, mishahara, marupurupu, na hata hizo nguo wanazovaa, hawana jibu. Watakuita majina mabaya. 

        Hakuna kilichonisitisha na kunifyatua hadi kufyatuka kama kugundua kuwa huyu zwazwa mkubwa aliyefyatua haya eti aitwa mbukuzi. Kabukua nini? Fyatu lenyewe tena lililoghushi linawatukana mafyatu wetu mashujaa wanaotuwakilisha ghaibuni? Kwani, mafisi na mafisadi wote wanaishi aka kufugwa wako ughaibu? Mbukuzi gani anayejumuisha mambo badala ya kuwa sceintific and specific? Tumuiteje zaidi ya zwazwa?!!
                Kisa tajwa kilinikumbusha namna mafyatu walivyonizodoa nikajiona zwazwa tena mfugo. Si waliishiwa ma-water. Nami, kutaka kuwafunga kamba si nikafyatuka na kupayuka kuwa tatizo ni tabia kaya. Baada ya Fyatuland kukumbwa na ukame, si, kwa uzwazwa na ubukuzi wa kuungaunga, nikafyatuka na kupayuka kuwa hili ni tatizo la dunia nzima. Kabla ya kuendelea, bi mkubwa mama Mfyatuko, alinijongelea na kuniuma sikio “dear, mbona Asia kuna mafuriko au na Fyatuland iko huko?” Lol. Si niliaibika. Kama fyatu zwazwa tajwa hapo juu, nami niliwalaumu mifugo kwa kufuga na kufunga akili zangu hadi nikapayuka kizwazwa. Mwenzenu niliaibika japo nilijitoa ufahamu na kujifanya hamnazo na kuendelea kuronga.
            Nimegundua kitu. Kumbe na ulaji wa dezo unalevya na kufyatua hadi fyatu mzima unafyatuka kama chizi au shehetani wa kufyatua vichwa! Juzi, fyatu mmoja kaniomba lift. Kwa kujiamini, nilimuuliza inakuwaje hana ndinga wakati zimejaa barabarani. Uzuri, huyu fyatu hakunifyatukia wala kujibu kifyatu wala kilevi kama huu mfugo. Alinidharau na kuuchuna.
            Siku nyingine, mafyatu walilalamikia ufyatuaji wangu na wafyatuaji wenzangu. Badala ya kuwapa majibu yanayoingia akilini si niliwaambia kuwa huu ni mchezo uliokuwa umeandaliwa na kuchezwa ghaibu! Wakati nifyatuka hivi, si fyatu mmoja akafyatuka na kunitolea uvivu na kuuliza “hivi mkuu huwa kinywa na mlomo wako vina mawasiliano au ugomvi?” Nilimuuliza alikuwa akimaanisha nini. Alijibu kuwa, kila nikironga huwa anaona kama kuna mgongano baina ya viungo hivi vya mwili mmoja.
            Kuna mwanafalsa mmoja maarufu aliyetangulia mbele ya haki. Alituasa kuwa unapochonga, ubakize akiba kwa vile hujui ya kesho. Tuliwaona mafyatu wangapi wenye vichwa na vifua tena vya haja? Walikuwapo akina Mkwavinyika Muyigumba Wamuyinga almaaruf Mkwawa, Mtyela Kasanda aka Milambo, Nyungu ya Mawe, mzee Nchonga, Jiwe, na wengine. Wako wapi?
Nimalize kwa kuwasihi wote. 

Tuache madharau. Fikiri na jisikilize kabla ya kupayuka. Mbona tunajitoa ufahamu na kuwa na kiherere wakati ni jana tu tulikuwa na Mwamba Jiwe. Yuko wapi? Ama kweli, simba akifa, usishangae panya kula ngozi yake au walevi kukojolea makaburi ya watakatifu. Ulevi si kanywaji tu. Hata msosi, tena wa dezo, unalewesha. Kweli, hujafa, hujaumbika. Nani alitegemea wala kuwazia kuyashuhudia haya? Kuna haja ya kuheshimiana. Kwani, hewala si utumwa.
Chanzo: Mwananchi J'tano leo.