The Chant of Savant

Sunday 17 January 2016

Open letter to Dr. Ndalichako

  • University corner: TOP TEN BEST SCHOOLS FORM SIX NECTA RESULTS 2012
Dr. Joyce Ndalichako, uh-oh prof,
Although I don’t know you personally, I’ve known you for a long time through your excellent academic performance especially when you’re at the helms of the organization whose name sound like the juice that bees use to make honey. Was it nectar or NECTA? The latter is the one I’m referring to. Baraza la Kutunga Mitihani Bongo which was supposed to be Baraza la Kughushi Mitihani under the former corrupt and sitting-duck-like regime.
            First of all, I congratulate you on being appointed minister for Education, Science, Technology and Vocational Training. Many people applauded your appointment knowingly that Mr. president made the right choice. It is as if the fish has been take out of the desert and placed back in water. Please, don’t let us down. We know you’ve what it takes.
Bad news –which is a challenge to you –is that you’re inheriting a very much sabotaged ministry after professor J4 Majembe who’s sadly retained for the matter of regional balance and Dr.Shucool Kawadog subjected the ministry and the education in general to gullible and greedy experiments resulting from myopic and short personal interests. I’m told that students in secondary schools no longer read as many books as possible as it used to be when we’re in school in those golden days of mzee Mchonga wa Burito (MGRHP). To revamp and turn around your ministry, you must go back to Mwalimu’s education regime whereby being in school meant getting the power to analyze and synthesize things but not to cram a few books without having any know how academically. I don’t know why such bin-Adams –wrongly viewed as educated –didn’t gage the consequences of subjecting education to experiments and personal interests. Didn’t they know that –apart from mentally starving students –they’re also starving authors and publishers in the hunk? Maybe, they wanted us to buy books from Kenya and Uganda whereas our academics would be lampooned for not being competent to write books. I, for one, have already written five books that can be taught in schools and universities if corruption and technical-know who were not the only qualifications the said gentlemen wanted for someone’s book or books to qualify to be used in our schools that have been turned into institutions of reproducing ignorance.
            Secondly, when education was felled, forgery became its substitute wantonly. It involved even vigogos, their offspring and earthlings. Refer to recent findings that 209 forged their academic qualifications out of government 704 employees. I don’t know how  many forgers you’ve in the entire hunk or in the cabinet. So, too, I don’t know how many professors, teachers, doctors, ministers, nurses, cops, politicians and whatnots that forged their certificates. Work on this urgently please. As it may be, forgery is but a foul-smelling humongous boil or jipu full of cancer that needs to be cleaned, and stuffed.  As the minister responsible for education, please make sure you encourage other ministries to take on forgery that’s become an anathema to our hunk. To succeed –as Mr. President once said –you need to be merciless and steadfast.  I know many bigwigs who obtained their academic qualifications illegally by purchasing them from diploma mills abroad. If you may, you must invite Msemakweli Keinerugaba, a lawyer who authored a book on the vice.  Arguably, seriously and mercilessly taking on forgers will discourage others contemplating to do the same not to mention motivating our youths to go for education instead of wasting time in drug dealings and other loss-making undertakings as it has always been since our education system was butchered by those we wrongly thought were truly educated while they wasted their times in classes to evolve more ignorant than they entered the classes. The situation is ridiculously alarming.  Our hunk’s been raped academically. People with honoris causas, quacks and traditional healers refer to themselves as doctors while most of them didn’t even complete standard seven. So, don’t crucify monkeys as you spare elephants. They are all animals. For the biggies alleged to have forged their academic credentials that’ve been retained in the cabinet, you can advise Dr. Kanywaji to ask them to step aside up till their matters are looked into and be cleared.
            Thirdly, don’t forget to look into the whole issue of teachers’ remuneration. If you may, you can even advise Dr. Mugful to downsize ministers’ District Commissioners’, Regional Commissioners' and Members of Mjengo’s humongous salaries so as to increase teachers’ salaries. For boozers, teachers are more important than politicians who happen to waste time in politicking and squabbling while our teachers inculcate knowledge in our virgin heads. So, too, remember schools as far as laboratories, dormitories, teachers’ houses and worthy textbooks. Don't forget to stop the business of tuition. If tuition is needed should be taught during school ours without charging students. I'm sure. You didn't receive any tuition when you're in school.
            In sum, madam, you’ve gotten a full plate. I therefore should not write a missive unnecessarily. I wish you well and guts to meet boozers’ expectations especially turning our schools into factories for producing knowledge but not ignorance as they currently are.
Thank you for reading my stuff and blessed be.
 Sincerely yours
Boozer,
Uswekeni.
Source: Guardian, Jan., 17, 2016.

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