Siri ya serikali kununua mashangingi

SERIKALI ya Tanzania inaweza kuwa miongoni mwa serikali tajiri sana duniani kutegemea na inavyotumia na kufuja pesa.

Tukio lililoripotiwa hivi karibuni mkoani Kilimanjaro ambapo Katibu Tawala wa Mkoa, Hilda Gondwe, aliuziwa gari aina ya Toyota Land Cruiser VX lililonunuliwa miaka mitatu iliyopita kwa sh 155,000,000 linaweza kutufungua macho ni kwanini serikali inapenda sana kununua magari haya ya bei mbaya pamoja na uchumi mbovu unaotegemea wafadhili na kuombaomba.

Inashangaza serikali ya namna hii kufumbia macho hasara ya sh 149, 000,000 tena zikisababishwa na mtu mmoja mdogo tu!

Hapa ushahidi wa mazingira ni kwamba watendaji wa serikali wanapenda kununua magari haya kama mradi wao wa kuyapata chee baada ya kuyatumia kwa muda mfupi.

Je, huko nje kuna akina Gondwe wangapi waliofanikisha hujuma hii kwa mlipa kodi na kwa muda gani?

Kwa ufupi, hapa ndipo pesa ya umma inapoteketea. Wanajiuzia magari, majumba, samani na kujitwalia mikopo. Hapa ndipo siri ya viongozi wetu kujitwalia Kiwira ilipo.

Leo utashangaa kuona mtu kama Spika wa Bunge akiishi kwenye nyumba ya kupanga inayokamua dola 7,000,000 karibia milioni kumi na ushei kwa mwezi.

Je, nyumba ya spika ya serikali iko wapi? Imeshauzwa kwa waliomtangulia? Mie sijui.

Huu ni ufisadi uliopindukia ambao unapaswa kuchunguzwa na kukomeshwa mara moja.

Leo kwa mfano, serikali itajenga majumba ya bei mbaya hadi mabilioni kwa watendaji wake. Wakimaliza muda wao wanajiuzia hayo majumba kwa bei ya kichaa. Rejea kwa mfano TANESCO kutokuwa na nyumba na kukarabati nyingine kwa mabilioni.

Ukichunguza kwa mfano nyumba anayoishi Spika na kulipa pango la shilingi milioni kumi na ushei, utakuta mwenye nyumba hii ana ukaribu na wenye madaraka. Je, namna hii tunaweza kusonga mbele?

Ingawa tukio la Gondwe kwa uzembe na ufisadi wa Tanzania litapita kama tukio dogo, kimsingi hii ni kashfa iliyopaswa kutufumbua macho na kuhakikisha kila jiwe linafunuliwa kujua mashangingi yanayoondolewa kwenye matumizi yanakwenda wapi. Tungehakikisha tunayarejesha yote.

Kinachokera ni wizi huu kuitwa uuzaji kiasi cha aliyejitwalia shangingi hili kujitetea eti ameuziwa na hana uwezo wa kujiuzia!

Tunakwenda wapi? Waliotuahidi maisha bora na haki wako wapi? Hawaoni kufuru na hujuma hii? Wapo kwenye madaraka kwa faida gani kama tunaibiwa mchana?

Kinachotisha na kusikitisha ni ukweli kuwa mhusika kuuhujumu umma anakwenda kwa cheo cha afisa tawala.

Kweli huyu ni afisa tawala au afisa twawala? Je, katika muda aliotumikia ofisini ameishafanya madili mangapi kama haya? Je, huyu naye ametangaza mali zake ili tujue zimepatikana vipi?

Je, huko nje wako wangapi wanaojiuzia majumba, kujipa tenda kupitia makampuni yao feki, kupeleka watoto wao nje kwa scholarships za umma, kujipendelea kwenye kila wafanyalo? Je, serikali itamchukulia hatua gani mtu kama huyu ili liwe somo na fundisho kwa wengine wenye tabia kama hii?

Nimegundua kwanini kelele zetu za kutaka nyumba za umma zilizonyakuliwa na utawala uliopita zinapuuzwa?. Huwezi kujua. Huenda hao tunaowaambia wazirejeshe kwa kutumia madaraka yao nao ni sehemu ya kundi la walionufaika na ujambazi huu.

Tukio hili pia limefichua uchoyo, ubinafsi na israfu ya watawala wetu visivyo na mfano.

Kwa mfano chanzo kilichofichua ufisadi huu kinasema kuwa gari husika lilikuwa likitumiwa na mkuu wa mkoa wa zamani wa Kilimanjaro Mohamed Babu lakini mkuu wa mkoa aliyefuatia Monica Mbega alilikataa kiasi cha kuilazimisha serikali kununua jingine aina ya Toyota Landcruicer V8 VX kwa thamani ya sh milioni 190.

Hivi mkuu wa mkoa wa namna hii anaweza kuisongeza nchi mbele kimaendeleo? Je, hii ni aina ya viongozi tunaotaka kwa stahiki ya taifa maskini kama letu? Kwanini hatuwezi hata kuwaiga jirani zetu wa Kenya?

Gondwe alipoulizwa ni kwanini alijiuzia gari la umma alikuwa na haya ya kusema: “Nisema tu kwamba mimi sina mamlaka ya kujiuzia gari, nimefuata taratibu zote. Niliandika barua kwenda Utumishi kuomba kununua gari, Utumishi nao wakawaandikia Miundombinu na baada ya kumaliza mchakato wao Miundombinu wakanijibu.”

Je, hii ni kweli? Kama hakujiuzia ni nani amejiuzia iwapo yeye ndiye mtendaji mkuu wa shughuli wa ofisi ya mkuu wa mkoa?

Ingekuwa vizuri aliyemuuzia awe mtu au kikao wajulikane. Maana hawa ndiyo wahujumu wa ofisi ya mkuu wa mkoa.

Tukubaliane. Namna hii nchi yetu imegeuka shamba la panya ambapo kila panya huguguna kilicho mbele yake. Mtendaji wa kijiji atataka anunuliwe pikipiki na baada ya miaka mitatu anajiuzia kwa bei ya kutupa.

Mtendaji mkuu wa wilaya, kadhalika, atajiuzia vilivyopo chini ya mamlaka yake, Waziri atajiuzia nyumba ya umma na rais anajitwalia Kiwira akitaka.

Mkuu wa mbuga za wanyama ataunda kampuni ya uwindaji huku mkuu wa barabara akiunda ya ujenzi na kujigawia miraba ya kuwinda huku wa barabara akijipa tenda ya ujenzi wa barabara ambayo ataijenga kwa kiwango cha chini akijilipa kwa bei ya juu.

Hii ni mifano kidogo ya kuonyesha ufisadi katika jamii yetu. Hali hizi nimeziongelea vizuri kwenye kitabu changu cha SAA YA UKOMBOZI, ambapo mbunge na mkuu wa mkoa wanashirikiana kutaka kujiuzia kijiji kwa kumtumia wakala wao mwekezaji Glutton Sucker.

Wanatumia ofisi za umma kuuibia umma kiasi cha wananchi kuathirika na kutangaza saa ya ukombozi ambapo serikali fisadi inayoangushwa kwa nguvu ya umma na kufanya uchunguzi wa utendaji wake na kuishia kuwafunga watawala walioangushwa na umma.

Japo kisa kizima ni cha kubuni, tuendako kitakuja kuwa kweli kama hatutachukua hatua kuondoa hali hii inayozidi kuhalalishwa kutokana na wakuu wetu kuibariki na kuikumbatia.

Kama tutakuwa wakweli tutagundua kuwa kwa cheo na kipato cha Gondwe, si rahisi mtu kuhimili kumilki shangingi baada ya kustaafu.

Hii maana yake ni kwamba kuna kipato kisicho na maelezo ambacho kinawawezesha watu kama hawa kuhimili gharama kubwa ya kutunza madude haya baada ya kustaafu.

Hapa ndipo utagundua mzizi wa umaskini wa walio wengi na ukwasi wa wezi wachache. Hapa ndipo ilipo siri ya mapenzi ya serikali kwa mashangingi pamoja na kelele nyingi za kupinga israfu na ufisadi huu. Tieni akilini.
Chanzo: Tanzania Daima Mei 26, 2010.

Sera yangu sasa ni kitochi mpango mzima

KWA vile urais ni ulaji rahisi wa dezo, nina azima ya kuwa rais wenu siku moja inshallah.

Baada ya kugundua mambo si mambo huko tuendako hasa kuhusiana na ulaji wangu, nilikuna kichwa.

Baada ya kukuna nimeiibuka na kitu cha kupigiwa mfano ambacho kitaniseleleza madarakani kwenye kijiwe.

Nimeongea na wazee wa kimeku na kuibuka na kitu kipya kinachoitwa kitochi. Sisemi tumehalalisha rushwa japo ni hivyo. Soma taratibu mzee wa Kitochi asiinyake akanifanyia kitu mbaya. Sitaki kuitwa maelekezo kutoa maelezo.

Kwa vile nimekuwa nikitawala walevi wenye njaa kama ng’ombe wanaohitaji majani, nilibuni takrima. Kimsingi bila njaa hakuna takrima na bila takrima hakuna njaa.

Nikiwa nimeandamana na vigogo wote wa chama, tulikaa kwenye jukwaa la VIP au Very Infamous Persons.

Kwanza, nieleze. Chama changu kimebadilishwa jina. Kinaitwa CCT yaani Chama Cha Takrima na sera yetu kuu ni ukarimu ambao adui yangu Msomi Mkatatamaa anasema utageuka kuwa ufisadi na uchakaramu uchwara. Nimebuni sera hii baada ya wimbo wangu wa jogoo na kamba za mambo safi kwa wote kutofua dafu miaka yote nenda rudi niliyotawala kijiwe.

Walevi wamengojea mambo kuwa safi bila majibu. Sasa mambo si safi ni chafu hakuna mfano. Sasa yatakuwa safi japo kwa msimu.

Ni juzi tu wanywaji walitaka kugoma na kuandamana kupinga sera yangu ya kunywa na kula peke yangu mimi, mama watoto, vitegemezi na maswahiba zangu.

Kwa vile hii ni lala salama yangu, lazima niwafunge kamba walevi kwa kuwapa vitochi vitakapoanza kuwachoma hapo baadaye walie na ujuha na uroho wao.

Kwa vile najua walevi wanapenda vya dezo, hawatakwepa kuuvaa mkenge kichwa kichwa.

Sitanii. japo yule mtendwa wa kubangaiza kwenye ulaji aliopewa na mtangulizi wangu amejikomba na kusema kuwa niliposema kuwa sera yangu ni kitochi nilikuwa natania, sina utani wa namna hii. Nafanya kweli-kuwabamiza walevi mkenge kwa mara nyingine.

Msishangae kumsikia mgosi Makambale na wapambe zangu wengine wakiimba kitochi tochi ila tusimulikane. Hayo tuyaache kwanza.

Chini ya sera ya kitochi, lazima mtu apigwe kitochi hadi azimie aweze kuachia kula. Bila kuwalewesha walevi wakazimia kwa makamuzi hawawezi kuachia. Si unajua usawa na ukapa huu?

Jamaa zangu maadui zangu wameishaanza kuzoza kuwa napanga kucheza mchezo mchafu. Hakuna mchezo mchafu hapa. Kama hamna sera wala sura ukiachia mbali mafweza na maepa basi njooni kwangu kama Lyatongolwa niwape kitochi mtulize boli.

Jamaa zangu wa mitaa ya Kwa Mfugambwa, Tandale kwa Mtogole, Uwanja wa fisi, Sisi kwa Sisi, Kwa Binti Kahenga Mburahati na Kigogo Luhanga bila kuwasahau wa kule Mbagala kaeni mkao wa kula. Japo kitochi ni cha akina meku, hata sisi wakwerezi huwa tunacho. Kinaitwaje? Msiniulize. Kitochi ni kitochi tu.

Kule Ntwara kina njomba mjue nkojo itaua mtu. Maeno ya Nakapanya, Nanguruwe, Nanyumbu, Nanyamba, Naumbu na Namtumbuka kaeni chonjo kitochi chaja.

Akina Mugabo pale Buzebazeba, Heru juu, Ruchugi, Mganza, Nguruka, Kazuramimba na Nyumbigwa elewa gwagwa itanyonga mwana wa mtu.

Kule Moshi pale Soweto, Nronga, Kalali, Nkwarungo, Kishumundu kwa bi Tunituni, Mashati na Karanga kaeni mkao wa kula. Maeneo ya Vunjo, Rombo na Nkweshoo mtulie tu. Jamaa zangu akina Lyatongolwa na Senti Mbili watatembeza kitochi kama hawana akili nzuri.

Mwakaleli, Matema, Nzove, Tukuyu na maeneo ya Kasumulu msikonde. Mambo ya kutupiana mimawe yamepitwa na wakati. Mambo ni kwa kitochi ila tusimulikane wala kuchomana bali kupeana maulaji.

Pia kutakuwa na migebuka kwa sana ili kushushia kitochi baada ya kusota kwa miaka mingi bila kulowanisha makoo.

Nikishawatwanga walevi kitochi, watafuatia marafiki zangu ambao nao lazima niwalipe fadhila ya kitochi kwa kunipigia ndogo ndogo.

Hapa nitaanzisha nafasi nyingi za ulaji kwenye utawala wa kijiwe ili sote tusherehekee matokeo ya kitochi.

Wale wanaopinga kitochi wasahauni kama masahauni tulivomsahau kwenye umoja wa vija--- we koma!

Sasa niwaeleze uzuri wa sera ya kitochi. Sera ya kitochi inasifika sana kwa kuruhusu watu wote kula pamoja. Mnahomola sehemu sehemu halafu mnahongana kiasi cha kutokuwapo mtu wa kulalamika kuwa hakushiriki uhomozi ambao wajinga wasiojua mambo wanaita ufisadi.

Watu wakishashiba kitochi hawawezi kuwaza vibaya kama kugoma au kuandamana. Wataandamanaje wakati nao ni sehemu ya jinai yenyewe? Nani ataandamana au kulaumu wakati alikula yeye.

Hamkumbuki yule jamaa aliyewaambia walevi kuwa wasimsumbue na kutaka huduma kwani ukuu wake aliupata toka kwao kwa kuwapa kitochi. Maskini majuha wale hawakujua kuwa mtindo wa kisasa ni kula na kulipa!

Uzuri mwingine wa kitochi ni kwamba ukishahomola hulazimiki kutangaza utajiri wako. Ukitangaza unatangaza umaskini kama yule jamaa yangu aliyepindishwa na mizengwe.

Pia sera ya kitochi ni uruhusu mtu kuwa mbwi kiasi cha mambo kujiendea bila kusumbuka.

Chini ya sera ya kitochi maisha yanakuwa kama sherehe. Kila mtu anafurahi kivyake japo baadaye wengi huanza kulia tokana na hangover.

Hapa ndipo mawe yote hufunuliwa na hatimaye mhusika kujikuta ni sehemu ya jinai. Onyo. Wakati huu huwa mhusika ameishachelewa kiasi cha kuishia kulaumu kila mtu.

Ukiwa unapata kitochi unasahau adha za vitegemezi, michango ya skuli, ada na upuuzi mwingine. Kitochi kikishakuchoma na kukutocha unauona ukweli ukiwa umekutolea macho usijue la kufanya. Kwa wasio na subira huanza kuhama vyama mara CCT.

Mara CCWM yaani Chukua Cha Wengine Mapema, KHAFU yaani Kaangika Hatimaye Uanze fujo na kulia lia ili uitwe kwenye ulaji kwa njia ya kuunda ushirika wa fisi na mbuzi.

Mie huko siko! Sipo kabisa msijeanza kusema yakhe weye watuonea maya ati.

Uzuri mwingine wa sera ya kitochi ni kuruhusu ulevi kupindukia. Waweza kulewa na kutapika hata kupuupu na mtu asiulize. Unakula na kunywa mle mle na kupuupu na kutapika kama mainzi kama alivyowahi kusema balozi mmoja kuwa jamaa zetu fulani hula na kwenda kutapika kwenye miguu ya wishitiri wao ambao nao siku hizi wamestukia ulaji na ufisi ahadi wa jamaa zetu wa nonihino.

Pia unaweza ukalewa kitochi hata mamlaka ukatukana na kukashifu mradi ulevi tu. Juzi hamkusikia nilivyolewa nikawatukana na kuwatisha walaji? Mmesahau nilivyo wafokea na kuwakashifu kama sina akili nzuri? Huu ndiyo uzuri wa kitochi.

Kitochi hukufanya ufanye mambo kitoto. Watoto hupigana punde hupatana. Ndiyo maana utoto na ukichaa havina mpaka. Hamkuona juzi wazee wa kitochi walivyofanya mambo ya kitoto kiasi cha kuitwa watu wazima hovyo?

Pia sera ya kitochi inaruhusu kutunga sheria halafu unazivunja unapostuka au kulewa. Kawaida ya walevi ni kutunga sheria na kuzivunja hapo hapo. Leo unaweza kumuona baba mtu na heshima zake akiingia baa kukamata ulabu akiwa na nyodo na maringo.

Atafunga hata tai umdhanie fulani kumbe hovyo! Mpe dakika tano baada ya kukamua kitochi, mara ataanza kukonyeza wauza baa huku akimtazama kila mtu kwa dharau na hasira utafikiri ndiye aliyezaa juha hili!

Ataingia baa kwa sauti ya upole hasa anapomuita barmaid. Punde ataanza kumtangazia ndoa utadhani hana mke.

Baadaye atampa ofa kama hana akili nzuri. Mwisho wa yote atastukia pesa yote imeishaishia kwenye kitochi na nyama choma kiasi cha kushindwa hata kulipia bia ya mwisho.

Hapa ndipo kuitana majina ya ajabu ajabu huanza. Muuza baa aliyekuwa akiitwa sweet na angel mara hugeuka shetani, changu na nyang’au na majina mengine ambayo si rahisi kuyaandika.

Hapa ndipo kanuni na sheria zote huvunjwa. Hapa ndipo baba zima hukojoa pembeni mwa shimo hata ukutani huku likiyumba utadhani mlingoti wa gari!

Kitochi hufunga milango yote ya maarifa kiasi cha baba zima kugeuka bonge ya bwege. Badala ya kutembea kwa madaha kama lilivyokuja huanza kutambaa utadhani beibi wa miezi minne. Utalisikia jitu likiapia ng’ombe na kuku wakati nyumbani halina mfugo bali panya!

Hayo tuyaache. Tuyaache wale jamaa wanaojisifia kuleta maendeleo wakati wameleta maangamio wasijesema nawanga wao.

Wow! Time is up and what’s up. Acha nijitoe wasomi wasijenifuma naongea ung’eng’e mbuzi wakanitia aibu bure.
Chanzo: Tanzania Daima Mei 26, 2010.

Wakati Kikwete akitanua nje angalia wafadhili wanavyobanana

PM flew over 50 times to sell stimulus program

By By Tim Naumetz, The Canadian Press


OTTAWA - Prime Minister Stephen Harper boarded his government jet and took to the skies more than 50 times last year to promote the government's multibillion-dollar economic stimulus program in two-dozen towns and cities.

A total of 34 domestic trips Harper took on government Challenger jets from April 2009 to last December — with 53 destinations or stopovers from coast to coast — cost taxpayers nearly $500,000.

The prime minister spent another $341,080 on a week-long Airbus tour of the Arctic, in part to promote the economic stimulus program and also as part of his plan to demonstrate Canadian sovereignty in the North.

Of the domestic flights Harper took on the Challenger, at least 24 went to cities where he would announce local infrastructure projects funded under the Economic Action Plan, according to records of the travel and statements from the Prime Minister’s Office at the time.

Opposition MPs say the travel, combined with more than $42 million worth of federal advertising for the stimulus package, was part of a concerted effort to highlight the plan while exploiting it for partisan Conservative purposes.

"This is an unprecedented use of public money and services in an attempt to exploit a publicly funded program for blatant partisan purposes," said Liberal MP David McGuinty, who called for an independent office to monitor government advertising.

McGuinty called Harper's Challenger trips a "travelling Conservative roadshow."

Harper spokesman Andrew MacDougall said the prime minister and other ministers travelled the country "to show Canadians how their government is building a stronger Canada."

To the frustration of the opposition parties, guest lists for the announcements included only local Conservative MPs or, in some cases, premiers where the two levels of government announced joint funding for stimulus projects.

"The absence of any opposition MPs was by design," said New Democrat MP Pat Martin. "I’m going to start bringing a folding lawn chair to these events and just put it on the stage."

Martin said he and other opposition MPs experienced similar problems when previous Liberal governments drew local attention to federal spending initiatives. But he added no previous prime minister has spent so much time travelling the country to take credit himself while also drawing in local members of the party caucus.

"This cross-country cheerleading using the government jets really sets a new record," said Martin. "The Economic Action Plan didn’t benefit by this shameless hop-scotching of Conservative ridings."

MacDougall said the events were restricted to Conservative MPs because "the opposition unfortunately chose to oppose the Economic Action Plan."

While the NDP voted against the budget that included the stimulus measures, the Liberals voted in favour of it.

Harper's Challenger trips included a June 11 flight to Cambridge, Ont., where the prime minister released his second report card on action-plan spending as one of the conditions he had agreed to in return for Liberal support in Parliament.

Harper took a Challenger to Saint John, N.B., in September to release his third report on the plan, even though the Liberals had expected the government to first release the reports in the House of Commons.

The prime minister was immune to that appeal and released the fourth report card on a government Airbus jet while flying to Beijing for an official visit.

The total cost of Harper’s Challenger flights from April last year to December came to $526,771, but they included four trips to New York and Washington and one to Port of Spain for a summit of leaders from the Americas.

Harper’s action plan announcements usually included the presence of at least one cabinet minister and at least one local backbench MP who would benefit from the publicity.

In Queenston, Ont., near Niagara Falls, Justice Minister Rob Nicholson was present when Harper announced funding for a rehabilitation of the Queenston-Lewiston Bridge. Local Conservative MP Dean Allison was also watching as Harper told the crowd he was raised nearby, his parents honeymooned in Niagara Falls in 1954, and he had "fond childhood memories" of the area.

The previous day in Sault Ste. Marie, Ont., represented in Parliament by New Democrat Tony Martin, Harper invited nearby Simcoe-North Conservative MP Bruce Stanton for the announcement of a bridge expansion over the Canada-U.S. border.

Green Party Leader Elizabeth May said use of government advertising and travel gives the incumbent government a tremendous advantage not only over the opposition parties, but also fledgling challengers in such a competitive political environment.

"A prime minister will fly to events, and that’s appropriate," said May. "But it’s the exclusivity of it. This kind of travel is unprecedented by a prime minister. It’s a prelude to campaigning, disguised as governing."

Mwenzenu ulevi umeniponza

JUZI baada ya kuutwika nilijikuta nafanya kituko kilichoniacha bila nguo! Japo nilikuwa nimebwia ulabu, nikiri na kusema ukweli. Jambo nililofanya limewaacha wanakijiwe wakinikamia kwenye uchafuzi ujao.

Yaani tukio hili lilinikumbusha watawala kama farao Amenmesse, Nabkkadnezza mwana wa Nabopolassar, Julius Caesar Assas aliyejiita Mungu, Nymphidius Sabinus, Iulius valens Lucianus, Sadam Hussein aliyejiona bora hadi akaweka dhahabu chooni akaishia kukutwa kwenye shimo la tandu na wengine wengi waliotekwa na ulevi wa kinywaji kiitwacho madaraka wakaishia kuwa machukizo na hasara kwao na jamii zao.

Niliwakumbuka majuha hawa waliojiona wajanja wakaishia kuwa aibu na machukizo milele ili waliofuatia wajifunze ingawa si kwangu. Mie sijifunzi kutokana na ujanja si ujuha na upofu kama wale jamaa zangu.

Siku hiyo niliwakumbuka wasomi maarufu kama Plato, Socrates, Marcus Tullius Cicero, Leucipus na wengine wengi waliotoa maonyo ya kupuuzwa na walioyapuuzwa wakapatilizwa vibaya sana.

Nisichoshe na falsafa. Maana zinanikumbusha mbali nilipokuwa nikisomea PhD yangu ya upayukaji kule Harvad.

Tuyaache watu wasianze kusema eti ninajidai kwa kubukua wakati sina sera wala sura ingawa nina PhD. Ila elewa. PhD yangu si ya heshima wala ya kughushi kama wale jamaa zangu.

Hata hivyo inabidi nijilaumu kwa kichwa ngumu na upofu wangu. Kwani Msomi Mkatatamaa alishanionya kuwa nisome alama za nyakati nikadhani analia maya. Alinipa live kuwa nimelewa madaraka kiasi cha kuanza kujiona muungu mtu. Alisahau kuwa huwa sina muda wa kusoma vitabu.

Nitasomaje wakati yangu ni makamuzi kwenda mbele? Nisome kupata nini wakati nilishapata zamani? Walevi wawe wakubwa, wadogo hata wenye madaraka huwa hawana tabia ya kujisomea. Watakunywa saa ngapi?

Unajua ilikuwaje? Si wateja wa kahawa walilalamika kuwa nakunywa kahawa bure na kutanua sana kiasi cha kuwapandishia bei ilhali hali zao ni dhoofu ilhali. Waliongeza kuwa mie na mke wangu na washirika wangu tunafilisi kijiwe kutokana na kupeana kahawa na kashata bure huku tukiwatwisha wao mzigo.

Walilalamika kuwa nao wanataka haki sawa na wafanywakazi wa lisirikali linalopunja wazalishaji wake kiasi cha kutaka waongezewe mshiko huko nalo likiwatishia kuwafuta kazi.

Hivyo walikuja na hoja ya kutaka nipunguze makamuzi ili bei ya kahawa ishuke. Walisema nisipofanya hivyo ama wagome kunywa kahawa au kutonichagua kwenye msimu wa uongo ujao.

Baada ya kuona walevi wamedhamiria kufanya kweli, niliitisha kikao maalumu cha walevi wakongwe na kumwaga nyodo nisijue nakula chambo!

Niliwapaka ile mbaya kulaleki! Kutokana na wakongwe wale kupewa kahawa na kashata za bure walikuwa wakitikisa vichwa kuunga mkono kila tusi na kashfa nilivyorusha.

Wengi waliwashangaa wakongwe hawa kutokana na kuishi bila kunywa kahawa kutokana na kutoimudu. Maskini kumbe mtu mzima anaweza kuwa hovyo! Maskini hawakujua duniani hakuna vya dezo na kama vipo vinaponza! Bila wao unadhani aibu yangu angeificha nani? Maskini hawakujua mie ni Lugard wa kisasa ambaye bila gawanya utawale hana mashiko!

Sikuwakawiza. Nilitema cheche kuwa atakayeendelea na upuuzi huu wa kudai visivyodaiwa nitakwenda kaya jirani nilete walevi wengine nione kama nao watakunywa na kula jeuri yao.

Hata hivyo ukweli ni kwamba nilikuwa nawafunga kamba. Kama wangefanya kweli manonihino yangenitoka kusema ule ukweli.

Kutokana na ulevi wa ulabu na madaraka nilio nao, nilimwaga nyodo utadhani siku ya siku nitajichagua mwenyewe au kura ya shortie wangu ndiyo itaamua!

Sasa yameishanifika. Niko nahaha kuwaweka sawa walevi wasinitose nikaumbuka. Kuna wakati nafikiri kukubaliana na madai yao. Lakini hata hivyo nachelea kukonda na kufa kutokana na kukosa makamuzi.

Mie naweza. Je, huyu bi mkubwa aliyezoea matanuzi atakubali? Maana nshamzoesha makamuzi kwenda mbele.

Pia nachelea mtu mwingine kuja na kufichua maulaji na mambo yangu. Hapa lazima ieleweke.

Siku nikiacha ukuu lazima nimuweke kibaraka wangu atakayenikingia. Upo hapo mwanangu? Siku hizi kutesa kwa zamu. Leo upo. Kesho historia hata mazonge. Maana avumaye baharini papa.

Hakuna aliyenikera kama mchunguliaji kuja na orodha ya makamuzi yangu na kuiweka hadharani wakati ilipaswa kuwa Top Secret. Kilichonisaidia ni kuweli kuwa walevi huwa hawatunzi na hawana kumbukumbu. Vinginevyo ningeumia.

Nichukue fursa hii kuonya: msipoangalia njaa na matumbo yenu mtaliwa mnaona. Mtatumiwa kama mitondoo kule lupango. Unajua kazi ya mtondoo? Tuyaache.

Kwa vile najua walevi wa kahawa hawana ubavu dhidi ya walevi wa madaraka, nitafanya fanya majamboz niukwae tena watake wasitake. Kwa muda uliosalia najua watasahau.

Siku ile ikifika wanachukua wanaweka waa nami naambua ushindi wa kishindo kama mibomu ya Mbalaga.

Nani amewajibishwa au kujiwajibisha baada ya mibomu kudedisha wana kaya bila hatia?

Watu ndiyo wanazidi kukamua wakikamia kuukwaa na kukamua zaidi. Kwanini wao waweze mie nishindwe?

Walevi walishangaa nilipopata ujasiri wa kuwazodoa na kuwaita majina ya ajabu ajabu kutokana na kutaka kuingilia ulaji wangu. Kwanza, niliwapa live kuwa ni wanafiki na waongo wanaodai natumia sana.

Hivi kwa ukuu wangu walitaka nitumie kama chokora au matonya? Mie natumia kama Mobutu na mke wangu anakamua kama Imelda Marcos au Gucci Grace Mugab wa Zimba za mabwe. Hapa wa kulaumu si mimi bali woga na ujinga wao. Kwani waone mara ngapi kujua mie sina mpango nao ili waamue waamuavyo?

Lazima nikiri. Siku ile sikuwa na roho mtakatifu bali mtakakitu aliyesukumwa na roho ya mwendawazimu kunena makufuru niliyonena.

Niliwapasha kuwa mie sitegemei kura za walevi kuendelea na ufalme wangu wa makamuzi. Nilisema wazi sihitaji kula ya mtu ila wajue nitaendelea kula watake wasitake.

Hata hivyo kiroho kinanisuta. Je, ni kweli sihitaji kura zao? Kupayuka kwingine ni ugonjwa utokanao na kichwa kukosa mawasiliano na mdomo.

Ngoja nijikate nikaaandae mikakati ya kuwaingiza mkenge walevi.

Naona wale wanaotukuta wanakuja. Acha nikitoa wasijeninyotoa roho.
Chanzo: Tanzania Daima Mei 19, 2010.

Mgomo: Rais alipotoka na kupotosha ukweli

MENGI yameishaandikwa kuhusiana na hotuba ya kipekee ya rais Jakaya Kikwete aliyoitoa Mei 3 akiwatisha na kuwatukana wafanyakazi.

Rais alisema mengi. Cha mno na msingi mkuu wa hoja yake ilikuwa matusi na vitisho na kashfa. Huwezi kumwita mtu muongo na mnafiki ukaacha kumkashifu ikiachia mbali kumzushia. Ingawa rais yuko juu ya sheria, siyo dhidi ya makosa yasiyo ya jinai na baadhi ya makosa ya jinai.

Msingi mkuu wa hoja ya rais ilikuwa kwenye mfano wa mauaji ya Kilombero ambayo hakutaja yalifanyika lini.

Alikaririwa akisema kuwa yalitokea mauaji ya wafanyakazi wawili huko Kilombero wakati wa utawala wa awamu ya kwanza. Baada ya kutokea mauaji hayo, rais alisema kuwa mwalimu Julius Nyerere alijikuta akizongwa na viongozi wa wafanyakazi na wananchi.

Ndipo Nyerere aliposema kuwa vikosi vya kuzuia fujo (FFU) viliundwa na wananchi kwa ajili ya kuzuia fujo. Na katika kufanya hivyo lolote laweza kutokea hata mauaji!

Tuangalie hoja ya rais. Je waandamanaji ni wafanya fujo kisheria? Hapana. Kwani kuandamana ni kutekeleza haki ya kikatiba na si kufanya fujo au kuvunja sheria kama rais alivyosema.

Kwa kuwachukulia waandamanaji wanaotekeleza haki yao kikatiba kama wavunja sheria na wafanya fujo, rais amepotoka na kupotosha ukweli kwa makusudi mazima ili kufanikisha azma yake ya kuwatisha wafanyakazi wasigome.

Kimsingi alichokusudia rais ni kuwatisha wafanyakazi na kudhihirisha serikali yake ilivyokuwa imejiandaa kuwapiga na kuwaumiza kama wangeandamana. Je hapa kuna utawala bora na unaofuata sheria iwapo serikali chini ya amri ya rais inafinya na kukandamiza haki za kiraia?

Kitu kingine kinachojitokeza kwenye dhamira ya rais ni kuonyesha wazi wazi alivyo tayari kulitumia jeshi vibaya hasa kuzuia raia wasifaidi haki zao za kikatiba. Hii ni ishara ya uimla ambao haufai kwa taifa linalojiita la kidemokrasia. Ni kuishiwa kimkakati na kiutawala.

Kikosi cha kutuliza ghasia kimeundwa kwa mujibu wa sheria kuzuia fujo na siyo kukandamiza haki za kiraia kama maandamano na migomo. Maneno ya rais yanawapa kiburi askari wa FFU ukiachia mbali kubainisha kuwa wapo si kusimamia sheria bali kuilinda serikali hata inapovunja sheria. Yanalenga kuwapofua macho askari wajione ni bora hivyo kuwa tayari kupokea na kutekeleza amri kufanya uovu pale ambapo wanapaswa hata kukataa.

Kwa mujibu wa sheria ya sasa ya kupambana na jinai dhidi ya ubinadamu, ikitokea unyama ukafanyika kama ilivyotokea nchini Kenya baada ya uchaguzi, askari waliotii amri mbovu wanawajibika kama mtu binafsi na kutii amri haiwi kinga mbele ya mahakama ya jinai ya kimataifa (ICC).

Kikwete anaweza kutisha hata kuamru FFU watwange watu virungu na kuwatia ngeu hata kuwaua kama alivyokaririwa akisema, ajue. Mambo yamebadilika. Siku hizi marais kufikishwa mbele ya ICC huko The Hague si muujiza tena. Anaweza kutishia na watu wakapuuzia wakaadamana na akatimiza azma yake akaishia pabaya. Arejee ni kwanini kuna maridhiano ya haraka visiwani Zanzibar.

Kisa hiki cha matumizi ya maguvu na visingizio kinanikumbusha nchi ya Mizengwe kwenye kitabu cha SAA YA UKOMBOZI ambapo kikosi cha Pinga Pata Kipigo kinatumiwa na watawala wezi kujilinda dhidi ya wanakijiji wanaopinga kijiji chao kuuzwa kwa mwekezaji Gluton Sucker anayeshirikiana na watawala fisadi. Pamoja na kuogopewa kwake, PPK inajikuta si chochote si lolote mbele ya wanakijiji waliodhamiria kujiletea ukombozi.

Kimsingi hata polisi ni wafanyakazi tena wanaonyonywa na kufanya kazi kwenye mazingira hatari na magumu kuliko hata hao wanaokwenda “kuwatuliza”. Angalia nyumba wanazoishi na kiasi cha mshahara wanacholipwa. Angalia hali hii inapowasukumu kuishi kwa kutegemea rushwa kiasi cha idara yao kuwa kinara wa jinai hii. Hawa wakijitambua wanaweza kufanya kama polisi wa PPK katika kisa cha nchi ya Mizengwe.

Hapa lazima tutie nukta. Alichofanya rais ni gawanya na utawale au divide and rule mbinu chafu iliyotumiwa na wakoloni na maimla wengi duniani kutetesa na kunyonya umma. Tuliona kule DRC wakati ule Zaire. Imla Mobutu Seseseko alizoea kuwaachia askari wajifanyie watakavyo ili waendelee kujenga chuki na wananchi na kumlinda yeye wakijiona wao ni bora wakati siyo.

Hivyo, kabla ya kuendelea, tuweke msisitizo. Tunakosoa maana potofu iliyopokelewa kutokana na maneno ya rais. Tunafanya hivyo kama raia wenzake katika kutetea na kujadili masuala ya taifa letu. Laiti kosa hili lingetendwa na chombo cha habari,patilizi lisingeweza kumithilika.

Kama rais anawaona wafanyakazi kama wafanya fujo na wavunja sheria, basi hana haja ya kujadiliana nao. Kuondoa utata ni kwa rais kuitisha mkutano na kukanusha tafsiri mbovu ya matumizi na maksudi ya kikosi cha FFU na majina na sifa zisizofaa alivyowaita wafanyakazi yaani waongo, wanafiki, wafanyafujo na wavunja sheria.

Ingawa rais anaweza kujipa moyo kuwa ameshinda, ushindi huu ni kwa muda. Bila kugusa na kutatua kiini cha malalamiko ya wafanyakazi na watanzania wote,hata kama hawatagoma leo, watagoma kesho.

Na yote hii ni matokeo ya rais na utawala wake kushindwa kutimiza ahadi zake ukiachia mbali kutokidhi matarajio ya wananchi.

Hivyo ni vizuri kuacha jazba, matusi, visingizio na siasa na kuliangalia tatizo. Apambane na ufisadi ambao kimsingi ndiyo chanzo kikuu cha kushuka kwa mapato ya taifa. Hapa bila kufufua maadili ya uongozi yaliyorithiwa na madili ya viongozi, hata afanyeje hawezi kulikwepa jinamizi la migomo hata vurugu huko tuendako. Maana kilichofanywa na serikali ni kuwatisha ili wafanyakazi wakubali kufanya mazungumzo iwahadae.

Tufupishe makala kwa kumshauri rais aache kucheza na mgomo na kutegemea maguvu ambayo kimsingi ni matumizi mabaya ya vyombo vya dola ukiachia mbali kuwa ukandamizaji na uvunjaji wa katiba na haki za umma.
Chanzo: Tanzania Daima Mei 12, 2010.

Mikakati ya Mpayukukaji kuelekea uchaguzi mkuu

BAADA ya kugundua kuwa tatizo kubwa la kaya ni kuwa na ombwe la uongozi hata utawala, nimeamua kugombea urais seriously. Kuondokana na hali hii, nikichaguliwa, nitahakikisha nafanya mabadiliko makubwa hasa uwekezaji wa kisiasa si kiuchumi. Sitarudia makosa ya Tunituni na Chekacheka kuleta uwekezaji wa kijambazi ambao ni uchukuaji na ugenishaji.

Nimeamua kufanya uwekezaji wa kisiasa badala ya kiuchumi baada ya kugundua kuwa siasa zinaathiri na kudumaza uchumi. Hivyo ukiwa na siasa safi lazima uwe na uchumi bora. uchumi bora hauwezi kupatikana bila kuwa na mifumo bora ya kijamii hasa siasa.

Nina uhakika wa kushinda mara hii kutokana na wanuka jasho kutishia kumnyima kula mpinzani wangu mkuu ambaye naye amewatolea live kuwa hataki kura zao kama wanataka kuingilia ulaji wake. Hii ni baada ya jamaa kutukuta na kutaka awaongezee mshiko wasijue mshiko ni wanene na wazito! Sasa mmeishaambiwa. Jamaa hataki kula zenu. Hapa ndugu zangu wapiga chaki wakafa kwa kukosa pumzi waliokuwa wakitumiwa kufanya kale kamchezo najua watakengeuka na kunipa mimi tafu ili niwakomboe.

Ni juzi tu niliongea na profesa Sivji ambaye amenishauri niwalipe wafa na chaki dau kubwa kuliko mawaziri wangu. Nawaahidini nitalitekeleza hili. Na amini. Mie sitoi ahadi za kipuuzi bali za kweli ambazo nisipozitekeleza mnitimue ikulu.

Sitawachoka, kuwatukana, kuwakejeli wala kuwatishia virungu. Sitawaita wanafiki na waongo pale mtakaponiambia ukweli. Chini ya utawala wangu maandamano na migomo vitaheshimika. Maana ni haki ya kikatiba na ushahidi wa kukua kwa demokrasia na uongozi bora wa sheria. Sitatawala kwa jazba wala ushikaji bali kanuni bin kanuni.

Sitawaganya kati makundi ya wazee, vijana, wanawake wala wa pwani na bara. Kadhalika nitajitahidi kutopayuka hadharani na kuwasingizia kwa vile mimi ni mkubwa. Ukubwa wangu ni wenu. Hivyo sitakuwa na ukubwa chochote zaidi ya kuwa kipenzi cha watu na tumaini lililorejea.

Naomba mniamini. Sitatumia jazba katika kujadili kero na shida zenu. Sitawasikiliza mawaziri wangu vimbelembele watakaoniletea uongo na fitina ili tusikosane bure huku wao wakinitumia na kunitia majaribuni. Nitatumia busara badala ya misuli na longo longo.

Naahidi sitaitisha mikutano ya kichama na kuiita ya umma kuwazodoa na kuwasingizia. Hapa wale wazee wangu waliozoea kutumika kama nepi wanisamehe. Mimi sihitaji kukutana na kundi lolote zaidi ya wahusika na walengwa wote yaani wananchi. Mimi si Lugard yule mwingereza mshenzi aliyeleta kanuni chafu ya gawanya utawale au divide and rule. Mie si mkoloni wala sina mawazo ya kikoloni. Nina mawazo na jazba za ukombozi. Jazba zangu si za kuwatisha na kuwaita majina ya ajabu ajabu. Ni jazba zinazohitajika kurejesha kaya yenu kwenye mstari na heshima yake.

Msianze kutoa mimacho. Sitabinafsisha ikulu yenu. Maana kufanya hivyo ni sawa na kujitia kitanzi. Kwani hili litakuwa eneo langu la kutanulia.

Nitakachofanya ni kuongea na nchi za Kanada ambako nitaomba mtu atakayefanya kazi ya waziri wa uhamiaji ili kupambana uhamiaji haramu ambao umegeuka kuwa halali kutokana na kukithiri kwa rushwa. Wale jamaa zangu mnaofichana kwenye mabohari kaa chonjo. Kale kamchezo ka kuleta jitu kihiyo na kusema ni expert katakufa siku nitakapotangaza baraza la mawaziri.

Nitakwenda Uchina ambako nitachukua mtu atakaye kuwa waziri wa viwanda na maadili. Hapa ndugu zangu mafisadi na mabingwa wa madili wangoje kitanzi tu. Waziri wa biashara na utalii atatoka Japan. Mambo ya ndani na ustawi wa raia atatoka Uswizi. Kilimo na ulinzi nitachukua Ujeruman huku fedha nikichukua toka kwa Obama.

Sayansi elimu na utafiti nitaleta mkorea kusini huku wanawake vijana watoto na wazee nikichukua toka Sweden (elimu). Mkuu wa majeshi nitachukua toka Israel huku mkuu wa polisi nikichukua Uingereza.

Michezo na burdani nitachukua Ufaransa. Afya nitarudi Ujepu ili nijue siri ya kuishi maisha marefu na watu wangu waishi maisha marefu kwa kutanua na kutesa. Nitakuwa na baraza dogo kuepuka kupoteza njuluku za umma kulipana fadhila.

Kamishina wa mamlaka ya mapato nitachukua Finland huku gavana wa benki nikichukua toka Uswizi kama kawa.

Makamu wa rais nitachukua Urusi ili awarusherushe kirusi. Jeshi la ndata litapanguliwa ili kuondokana na rushwa. Nitaajiri ndata wengi toka Ujapani kwa vile ni waadilifu sana.

Msemaji wangu nitaazima yule wa Obama huku nikiondoa body guard maana sitakuwa na maadui kwa vile sitapunyua kiduchu wala njuluku za wana kaya. Mshahara wangu utagemea taaluma yangu ya upayukaji. Mai waifu hatakuwa na NGO wala hataandamana name kila mara ili kupunguza uharibifu wa njuluku za kijiwe.

Kitu kingine nitakachofanya ni kuleta FBI, MI6 au SIS, Mosad, KGB na Interpol kuchunguza wizi wa HEPA hasa kumkamata Kagodoka na wezi wa meremeta, Deep Green Finance na majambazi wengine harak. Pia nitaleta wataalamu wa akili kumpima rafiki yangu Gus Lyatongoka ili tujue anakabiliwa na aina gani ya kichaa au utapiamlo wa kiakili.

Kitu kingine nitahakikisha kila mwakaya anakuwa na kitambulisho chenye taarifa zake zote. Vitambulisho hivi vitakuwa digitalized and computalized kuepuka kughushi kama walivyofanya wale jamaa wa shahada feki. Pia jamaa wote wanaotuhumiwa kughushi nitawafunga maisha na kukamata mali zao zote kwa vile zimetokana na utapeli.

Wale jamaa zangu wanaopewa tenda za upendeleo kama vile kujenga barabara wakajenga barabara feki kama ile ya Kilwa Road na nyinginezo wajiandae. Mbuga za wanyama nako kaa mkao wa kula. Mambo yenu yote ninayo na dawa itapatikana tu baada ya kuapishwa. Pia wale jamaa wa mishahara wanaolipa hadi maiti wajue wameishatinga kwenye runinga yangu.

Kadhalika, wale wapenda kutanua nje kufanya ziara za kipuuzi na warsha za kulipana per diem bila kufanya chochote wajue nawajua na sitawavumilia. Nitahakikisha siasa inakuwa kazi. Lazima mwenye kushiriki awe na sifa na hakuna atakayeruhusiwa kufanya siasa kama atakuwa na zaidi ya miaka 55. Sitaruhusu wazee waitwe vijana ili kuwahadaa watu wawachague. Ukiwa na kuanzia miaka 55 jua hufai kushika ofisi ya umma kwa vile umeishastaafu. Kwanini taaluma nyingine wastaafu wanasiasia wasistaafu? Dawa ni kuifanya siasa taaluma ili tuone.

Nitabadili katiba kutoa nafasi kwa wananchi kutathmini utawala. Kama wataona sitimizi matakwa yao basi waitishe snap election iwe ni kwangu rais hata wabunge. Viti vya dezo na matusi yaitwayo maalum nitafuta ili kila mtu ale jasho lake. Maana naona jamaa wameishaanza kupenyeza watoto na wake zao kufaidi viti vya ubwete ambao ni wizi kwa wanakaya wangu.

Ngoja niishie kabla sijaitwa mnafi na muongo nikarusha ngu.... malizia mwenyewe. Unadhani mie ni mtu wa kutishiwa nyau nikanywea wakati najua nina maguvu? Hivi ng’ombe na kupe nani anamhitaji mwenzie?

We nenda kachape kazi kabla hujachapwa.
Chanzo: Tanzania Daima Mei 12, 2010.

Draft on the cross for 30 pieces of silver

By PHILIP OCHIENG

Judas readily came to mind when I read that our churches were pocketing American dollars to frustrate our constitution. The Iscariot – we now know – was third only to Mary Magdalene and Simon Magus among the zealots closest to Jesus.

It is not fortuitous, then, that these are the three most maligned by the European Church. For their Gnostic Christology – their version of what happened in Palestine 2,000 years ago – fully contradicts the Constantinian version called Christianity.

So detached Bible scholars now impugn the story that this Judas accepted “thirty pieces of silver” to betray the king-in-waiting – a story which, in any case, was filched, almost verbatim, from the Eleusian legend of Dionysus.

Scholars know why Judas’ enemies within the movement would cook up such a scandalous story. Judas stood in Jesus’ way to the top position of chief priest.

Instead, as “Satan” (his Qumran code-name), he “tempted” Jesus to accept the lower position of Mashiach (“messiah”, Greek Christos, English King).

But, if we take the gospel’s story for granted, the question arises: Why would anybody want to bribe Judas to perpetrate such a dastardly crime? Because – the Church asserts (and I agree) – as King, Jesus was undermining somebody’s authority.

Both Joseph Caiaphas and the Sanhedrin, on the one hand, and Pontius Pilate and imperial Rome stood to lose greatly should the Jesus movement succeed. So both would have had a strong motive for paying somebody to betray Jesus.

However, to betray such a popular person, Judas would have demanded a great deal of money. Clearly, the authors did not understand what the Eleusian “thirty-pieces-of-silver” allegory meant.

Nevertheless, they borrowed it because it helped them to portray Judas as a cheap criminal.

What is the analogy? If you liken Kenyans to the Zealots, bent on liberating their country from Caesarian tyranny (the Lancaster constitution), you can liken the Church to the Jewish Sanhedrin (at that time dominated by Home Guards).

During Bomas, there were many charges that the extreme right-wing American evangelical churches were pouring money into Kenya to help defeat any concession at all that might be made to Islam.

For some reason, the American corporate family – with the Christian establishment as its integument – nurses unfathomable hatred of Islam. Now that Stalinism (alias “Communism”) is “dead”, the phobia for Islam has become schizophrenic.

WITH EUROPE’S DECLINE AS THE WORLD’S ECONO-STRATEGIC master, America – Europe’s illegitimate child – has never hidden its ambition to take over as the world’s undisputed economic, technological and military overlord.

It has fought hard – often at ruinous costs – to destroy all independent economies and all centres of potentially dangerous thought. With the fall of “communism”, Islam has emerged as such a centre – the only thought system militantly demanding cultural and financial autonomy.

That is why the American corporate family is scared stiff that all black Africa, next door to the Maghreb and Arabia, might soon fall to Islam.If, then, corporate America’s hatred of Islam is purely econo-strategic – and has exactly nothing to do with theology – what can the African Christian gain by fighting Islam with such “crude weapons” as to suborn witnesses against the kadhis’ courts?

The answer: Nothing. The African church is not fighting Islam for Africa. It is fighting it only for America. The mind of Africa’s educated elite has long been derailed into worshipping upper-class Western values.

Every dogma on democracy and salvation is sacrosanct just because it comes from London’s Whitehall or Lambeth Palace or Boston’s Watchtower redoubt. This is the same Lambeth that once scoured the Bible to find a justification for tethering black people into slavery and death by the million.

Ever since mercantile times, Christian buccaneers, slave drivers and colonial administrators have murdered a billion human beings – including in Kenya.

But, because we refuse to think for ourselves, the same foreign murderers have convinced us that God loves a foetus much more than He loved six million Jews and the entire Tasmanian population.

Because we refuse to think, after we have greedily swallowed the tripe that abortion is murder, we get so full and sleepy in the head, we just cannot remember to ask our foreign guru: If human life is sacrosanct, what about the Amerindian, the Aborigine, the women “witches”, the Saracen, the “heretic”?

Since then, indeed, the dollar has replaced Jesus as the godhead. That is why Pilate can so easily push a few coins – just thirty pieces of silver – into the pockets of Nairobi’s Judas Iscariot to help deliver our constitution to Golgotha, shouting: “Crucify it! Crucify it!”

ochiengotani@gmail.com
Source: Daily Nation May 9, 2010.

Aarrrr can Egypt lay such claims over river Thames?

Hearing mealymouthed hypocrisy-cum-lie propounded by Egyptian authorities one feels nauseous. There is this standoff regarding who should and who should not use the waters of Nile.


Egyptians and Sudanese want colonial agreement over the use of Nile water to apply as it deprives upstream countries the right to the water! This infamous treaty denies upstream countries the right of using Nile water as pleased.


Recently, Egypt and Sudan boycotted signing Nile basin treaty. They want a lion share in the whole business of Nile! Do they know where Nile originates? Isn’t this mere provocation-cum-suttee in the first place? If common sense is used, the duo is but losers. Why should they want water to feed their people as others starve theirs? No life is better than another. Upstream countries, so too, use the same to feed their people. Who are they so as to demand lion share of Nile as they refuse others to use their own water? Is it Arab mentality of better than thou or arrogance and slave mind? Go figure!

Suprise suprise! These guys still think. They can convince the whole world to support their bulimia! You know what. The duo is basing their claims in a colonial pact entered between Egypt and British colonial regime at the high noon of colonialism. This stinking agreement stipulates that Egypt should have an upper hand with regards to the matters of Nile without owning the source of the same! This is the cudgel they want to use to bludgeon others. The duo would want to see Article 14 (b) of the proposed Co-operative Framework Agreement (CFA) which relates to historical water rights and uses apply! What hogwash!


“Egypt’s historic rights to Nile waters are a matter of life and death. We will not compromise them,” Moufid Shehab, minister of legal and assembly affairs, told parliament after the talks. This is provocative and laughable. Why don’t Egyptian authorities want to accept the fact that the British colonial regime entered this agreement to fool Egypt? How can a thief enter agreement with any party knowingly what they are agreeing upon is a stolen item? Who is a fool in this illegal transaction? Supposed Nubian lay claim on owning and occupying Egypt just because history has it: Egypt and her civilization are theirs.What Shehab called historic rights are nothing but colonial lies.


The 1929 deal, brokered on one side by British colonial powers in Africa, gives Egypt 55.5 billion cubic metres a year, the biggest share of a flow of some 84 billion cubic metres. This stupid stipulation did not put in consideration that Ethiopia produces more than 80% of the water Egypt is hollering about!


“We will not sign on to any agreement that does not clearly state and acknowledge our historical rights,” Egyptian Water Minister Mohamed Nasreddin Allam said after the meeting. Is this historic right or historic lie?

This is hogwash. It is the same mentality of colonial parasites that still claim that white men discovered Mount Kilimanjaro.


“Practically, even if those countries sign a framework agreement without Egypt, its effects won’t be lasting ...how are (upstream countries) going to stop the flow of water?” Safwat Abdel-Dayem, secretary general of the Arab Water Council was recently quoted as saying.


Again, is this Arab frozen and backward-thinking mentality? The issue is not to stop water or vengeance but making use of it. This reminds me laughable steps by Dubai when its royals were mistakenly expelled from Kenya. Instead of facing it, they imposed requirement for Kenyan to possess a university degree in order to enter Dubai.

However Egypt threatened to use military force to take on whoso claims this right, rule military confrontations out. Where will Egypt get the muscles to take on such comparably self sufficient countries? Egypt is not that mighty, bully and able to take on seven countries. It is not even that kamikaze and unreasonable.


After all, time for war is long gone. If it tries, one can just attack one ship or two that bring poor and dirty wheat to feed Egyptians and the game will be over. Moreover thanks to dictatorship and nepotism, Egypt is divided and weak.

Importantly, Egypt should stop self deception. Instead, it has to mend fences it has forgotten for long. The point is it should think diplomacy. For long, Cairo has taken Nile water as a natural right whilst it is but shared by others. I have nary seen Egyptian president visiting any upstream country to talk about its life! Instead, it has invested heavily in the Middle East.


Thanks to Arab mentality,it has always been busy chasing deals with west and middle east as it ignored these strategic partners.


I recently saw some stupid and racist Egypt sheiks on youtube. They were saying that, despite African ladies being black -except teeth and eyes, the only things that can attract Arab men- they must marry in upstream countries in order to spy them. This way they’ll fix the problem!


They too add another false. They allege that Israel is behind all this misunderstanding regarding Nile waters! Egyptian authorities are trying to create an enemy in order to get away with it. They don’t want to face reality that their lazy government is the problem in lieu of upstream countries. The authorities know the shortage of arable land they have. They still don’t encourage citizens to embark on family planning and population balancing!

If there is a real enemy facing Egypt is nothing but big population. This plus corruption and bad governance make it harder for Egypt to make it through this crisis without looking into the eyes of a true enemy in lieu of the far-fetched one. Refer to food riots that caused death in 2008. Can the country that can not feed itself take on seven countries and succeed really? War will nary be a solution but wastage of resources and time.

By the way, can Egypt bespeak of water Thames waters? This is impossible as it is to embark on military solutions as far as the use of waters of river Nile is concerned.
Source: African Executive Magazine May 4, 2010.

Kikwete wa kweli alipojifunua

NILIWAHI kuandika makala kuwa Rais Jakaya Kikwete ni mtu mwenye masikio madogo na kinywa kikubwa, nikimaanisha anasema mengi na kutosikia lolote.

Hii ilitokana na Kikwete kutupiwa tuhuma nyingi na asijibu hata moja, ukiachia mbali kupuuzia ushauri wa kuwawajibisha wasaidizi na wateule wake waliobainika wazi kushiriki vitendo vichafu vya kifisadi.

Kwa wanaokumbuka Kikwete alivyopuuzia ushauri wa Watanzania kumtaka awafukuze wasaidizi na wateule wake waliotuhumiwa kughushi vyeti na kupoteza pesa za umma, wanajua nimaanishacho.

Kwa wanaokumbuka jinsi Kikwete alivyokataa kujibu tuhuma zilizotolewa na wapinzani hata wazee maarufu wa chama chake kuwa ushindi wake uliwezeshwa na kupatikana kutokana na pesa za EPA, ukiachia mbali kuwa mtumwa wa mafisadi kama alivyosema mzee Joseph Butiku, wakati wa kongamano la kumbukumbu ya Baba wa Taifa Mwalimu Julius Nyerere, Novemba mwaka jana.

Hata mashambulizi haya mazito yalipotoka, Kikwete alijitahidi kutojibu huku akiwaacha, Katibu Mkuu wa CCM, Yusuf Makamba, ajibu kwa hoja nyepesi na kashfa ambazo kwa kiasi kikubwa zilimshushia heshima mzee Makamba.

Tangu alipoingia madarakani mwaka 2005, Kikwete alijitahidi kutojionyesha alivyo, akiacha ile sifa ya uchangamfu na ukaribu kwa watu wa kada mbalimbali.

Hata hivyo, sifa hii ilianza kuingia walakini alipoanza kuwa mbali na watu huku akitumia muda mwingi ziarani ughaibuni kiasi cha wakosoaji kusema nchi ina ombwe la uongozi.

Katika hili walimtaka Kikwete afanye maamuzi mazito badala ya kukimbia matatizo kwa ziara za ughaibuni ambazo zimelalamikiwa kula pesa ya umma bila sababu.

Hakuchi hakuchi kuchele! Juzi baada ya kutoalikwa kwenye kilele cha Sikukuu ya Wafanyakazi Mei Mosi na tishio la mgomo wa wafanyakazi nchi nzima, vilimfikisha ukingoni, kiasi cha kukutana na wazee wa Dar es Salaam haraka haraka na kurusha makombora ambayo yalitafsiriwa kama kuishiwa subira, ukiachia mbali Kikwete wa kweli kudhihiri.

Hili lilikuwa ni kombora la aina yake kwa Kikwete kutokana na aina ya lugha na hadhira alivyotumia.

Alikaririwa akiwashambulia wafanyakazi na hasa viongozi wao akisema: “Mie ndiye mwajiri mkuu nisikilizeni mimi, msimsikilize Mgaya (Kaimu Katibu Mkuu TUCTA) mtafukuzwa kazi wala Mgaya hamtamuona! Mtapoteza haki zenu…akili ni nywele, kila mtu ana zake, mtu mzima dawa.”

Licha ya kutofaa, kauli hii itafsiriwa kama tishio kwa wafanyakazi na shambulio binafsi kwa Mgaya.

Kwa wanaojua dhima, heshima na uzito wa taasisi ya urais, licha ya kushangaa walisikitika kuona rais anajishusha hadi kushutumiana na mtu mdogo kwake.

Kwa wanaokumbuka shutuma lukuki kwa marehemu Baba wa Taifa zilizorushwa na Christopher Mtikila, kuwa Mwalimu alikuwa Mrundi na upuuzi mwingine, Mwalimu alipotakiwa kujibu tuhuma aliwakemea waliomshauri hivi kwa kuona kuwa hawakuwa na busara.

Kwani angeanza kujibishana na Mtikila, heshima yake ingeshuka na Mtikila kuwa maarufu.

Kwa mzee mwenye busara, mtoto anapokutukana huwa humjibu, kwa kuogopa kuonekana mtu mzima hovyo.

Hata kichaa akikuvua nguo huwezi kufukuzana naye. Utalinda heshima yako kiakili.

Ushahidi wa hili unaweza kuliona kwenye majibu ya Mgaya baada ya kushambuliwa na rais.

Alikaririwa akisema kuwa kitendo cha rais kumsema mbele ya hadhara kimemuongezea umaarufu mkubwa kwenye jamii.

Hii maana yake ni kwamba amejishushia heshima, ingawa Mgaya hakutaka kuonekana asiye na busara kwa kusema hivyo wazi wazi.

Aliongeza kuwa Rais Kikwete, alipaswa kutambua kuwa yeye ni kiongozi wa nchi, ambaye hatakiwi kutoa maneno kama kiongozi dikteta.

Wengi waliosikia maneno ya viongozi wa wafanyakazi kwenye kilele cha Mei Mosi walishangaa kusikia makombora ya Kikwete.

Kwani walikuwa wameweka bayana wasivyo na ugomvi na Kikwete, bali watendaji wake, japo hakuna tofauti kati ya watendaji na aliyewateua.

Walishangaa sana kuona alivyowalipa.

Bila kupindisha maneno, ukweli ni kwamba rais alijishusha sana na kuamua kujibizana na kiongozi wa wafanyakazi, kwa sababu tu ya kutetea masilahi ya taasisi yake.

Ningekuwa yeye, hiki kingekuwa kitu cha mwisho kufanya. Kikwete alipaswa kutoa majibu ni kwanini wafanyakazi hawakupaswa kugoma na si kuwatisha.

Maana kugoma au kutogoma ni haki yao ya kikatiba. Rais hapaswi kufinya au kuteka haki za kikatiba za raia. Bila wao hana lolote.

Anawahitaji raia kuliko wanavyomhitaji, hasa kipindi hiki kuelekea uchaguzi, ambapo serikali ya Kikwete haijawaridhisha wengi. Rejea kughubikwa na tuhuma za ufisadi, matumizi mabaya ya fedha za umma, kutotimiza ahadi zake, kutotoa majibu ya maswali yanayoulizwa na wapiga kura na wananchi na mengine mengi.

Kama kuna mtu alimshauri kujibu mapigo kwa staili ile, amempoteza na huyu si mshauri bali adui yake.

Kilichotakiwa hapa ni hekima na subira na si kutishana. Maana hata kama rais ni mwajiri mkuu kama alivyosema, hizo kazi anazoajiri watu si zake bali za wananchi waliomwamini kumpangisha Ikulu kwa muda tu.

Hivyo, rais hakupaswa kukwepa jukumu na wajibu wake wa kupokea na kuyatatua matatizo na malalamiko ya wafanyakazi.

Je, alitaka waende kwa nani iwapo watendaji wake walifeli? Kama alivyosema yeye ni mwajiri na kiongozi aliyekasimishwa dhamana na umma.

Japo Kikwete kaishawatibua wafanyakazi, anapaswa kutumia busara zaidi kuliko vitisho.

Maana hata nchini Ufaransa (1848) na Urusi (1917), wafanyakazi walipotishia kugoma, watawala kwa kiburi waliwakejeli na kuwatisha, hatimaye wakatupwa nje na kubakia historia ya kutia kinyaa.

Kwa wale walioaminishwa wakati wa kampeni kwamba Kikwete ni mtu msikivu, mvumilivu, tumaini lililorejea na sifa nyingine kemkemu, sasa wana picha tofauti baada ya Kikwete wa kweli kujifunua kwao.

Nimalizie kwa kumnukuu nabii Paulo, Wagalatia 3:1 akisema: “Enyi Wagalatia msio na akili ni nani aliyewaroga; enyi ambao Yesu Kristo aliwekwa wazi mbele ya macho yenu...?”

Kwa vile Kikwete wa kweli amejifunua, wafanyakazi wekeni nukta.
Chanzo: Tanzania Daima Mei 4, 2010.

Mwenzenu nimekoma

MIE ni mtu mkubwa tu. Nimewahi kutumikia kijiwe katika nyadhifa nyingi nono nono tu. Pamoja na ukubwa wangu, nina roho ndogo na nyepesi kama fisi hasa nionapo wale viumbe wanaovaa gagulo.

Na huu umegeuka mzigo unaoninyima raha kiasi cha kufanya maisha yangu yakose maana hasa baada ya kustaafu.

Nikiona mguu tu huwa nachanganyikiwa. Nikiona kiuno ndiyo usiseme. Huwa nakufa ghafla na kufufuka baadaye. Maisha ya namna hii yana gharama zake hasa aibu na majuto usiambiwe. Kwani kila mtu angetaka aheshimike na kuthaminiwa. Kwangu hili hakuna. Ni mateso. Mateso matupu usisikie.

Nilianza na house girl nikamdunga mimba akanizalia mwanaharamu. Sijui hapa mwanaharamu ni mimi mama mtu au mtu mwenyewe! Nimejaribu kumkana bila mafanikio.

Baada ya kunogewa nilimdunga aliyekuwa chini yangu na kumzaa huyu karukarange aliyevamia hekalu yangu na kuniacha nyang’anyang’a mbele ya mshirika wa bedroom.

Kwa vile ni mkubwa nilikimbilia vyombo vya dola nikawini kwa muda.

Ukweli huumiza lakini huweka huru na kuponya. Badala ya kuwakana wanaharamu wenu wakubaliane na muongee na washirika wenu wa bedroom kuliko kutenda ukatili huu kwa viumbe wasio na hatia.

Hawa ni matokeo ya upogo na ufisi wetu. Hivi unapovua zipu hovyo hovyo na kutumia ulichonacho kumulika kila gagulo unategemea nini?

Aliwahi kuniuliza mshirika wangu wa bedroom (mke wangu) iliyogeuka kuwa badroom nikabaki kutoa mimacho kama bundi. Maana alichukia kuliko mbogo! Pamoja na ujogoo wangu, siku ile nilinywea usiseme. Tuache utani usaliti ambea usikukute.

Je, huko nje mko mafisi kama mimi wangapi tena wenye nafasi usioweza kuwategemea?

Dada zetu nao wanatumia miili yao kama duka.... acheni tunaumizana baada ya kuliwazana.

Unajua ilikuwaje? Nilikutana na huyu dada wakati ule akiwa chuma nami nikiwa bosi. Ni kutoka kabila la akina anko ambao huishia kuwa sweetheat. Tuyaache mshanielewa. Yethu! Kama hujanipata basi kajinyonge baada ya kupata mbege na kitimoto siku ya Krismasi migombani.

Kule kama unazo utachukua kila gagulo bila kujali ukoo au nini. Unasani nadanganya?

Anakujia dada unamdeku na kumzimii huku ukimwaga ofa kwa sana kwa janaume moja analosema ni kaka mtu. kumbe loooh! Kajisemea Samba Mapangala mwalishwa sahani moja! Kwani haya hayapo na hatuyaoni hata kama twayalimbika?

Dada zenu nanyi punguza razi mtatumaliza ukiachia mbali kuziweka ndoa zetu matatani.

Nanyi midume wenye ndoa acheni uchu hata kama mna pesa na nafasi. Ukimwi haujui cheo chako ukiachia mbali kuzalisha watoto wasiotakiwa wanaoteseka hadi wawagongee milango.

Nanyi kwa roho mbaya eti mnawaitia polisi kwa vile mna madaraka. Acheni. Huu nao ni ukatili kwa watoto ukiachia mbali kuwa unyanyasaji usio kifani.

Ngoja nikumegee stori. Soma taratibu bi mkubwa asikusikie akaninyotoa roho bure. Nilikuwa zangu nimepowa homu bila hili na lile. Mara mlinzi wa mlangoni akaja ndani kuita.

Kwa vile bi mkubwa alikuwa zake saloon nilikwenda kudeku kunani. Hamad! Nakumbana na binti niliyemzaa kwa kuzini! Sura huulizi.

Kwa vile sikuwa nimewahi kumnyakisha bi mkubwa nyeti hii, kwanza nilimwamuru mlinzi arejee lindoni. Nilimkaribisha ndani binti yule na kumsihi aniambie yeye ni nani ingawa moyoni nilishajua yeye ni nani.

Bila ajizi si alibwatuka kuwa ni binti yangu niliyemzaa kule mushie! Bila kungoja aongeze nilimwambia. “Ndivyo ulivyotuma uje kunidhalilisha na kuvunja ndoa yangu na maadui zangu waliosikia kuwa nataka kugombea ubunge siyo?”

Binti hakuamini masikio yake. Aliuliza kupata uhakika. “Unasemaje baba?”

Nilimkatiza. “Nani baba yako mwanaharamu wewe?” Naye hakujivunga. Alinizodoa. “Leo baba unanikana kwa vile uliyofanya kunizaa uliyafanyia sirini usijue itafichuka!”

Nilimkazia macho na kumtishia nikisema: Unajua mimi ni nani?

Naye alijibu kwa kujiamini. “Wewe ni baba yangu mzinzi wa mama ambaye unanikana kwa vile una madaraka. Kumbe ukuu wote bure na hovyo!”

Kuona kibinti hichi cha kuzaa nje ya ndoa kinanipotezea muda na kuweza kusababisha bi mkubwa atukute, nilikiomba nikipe shilingi laki tano kiishie kikakataa. Kilidai hakikuja kula rushwa bali kuishi kwao yaani kwangu!

Kuona maji yamezidi unga niliwaita vijana wa polisi wakakichukua na kukificha lupango kabla ya kukifungulia mashitaka ya kuvunja na kuingia, kushambulia, kuvuruga amani, kutishia maisha na false presentation ukiachia mbali mistake of facts and abracadabra and bragadaccios.

Kufika mahakamani si watetezi wa haki za watoto walitaka kunivua nguo. Eti walinitaka kupima DNA! Kwa kujua ukweli ulioko nyuma ya longo longo zangu niligoma lau kuficha aibu. Maana ningekubali ningekuwa sawa nimejitundika kitanzini au kujipeleka majilini ilhali nikijua matokeo yake. Nani apime DNA? Thubutu yako. Hadithi ni ndefu.

Baada ya kunusurika zali la kibinti cha kuzaa nje ya ndoa, nimepiga marufuku getini kwangu kuonekana visichana au vivulana au wanawake wenye vitoto. Bila kufanya hivyo naweza kujikuta naumbuka bure huku mshirika wangu wa bedroom akinipiga talaka kipindi hiki ambacho sina ukuu tena ukiachia mbali uzee kuingia.

Zilzala hili limezusha bonge ya sheshe. Maana tangu habari hii ibumburuke mshirika wangu wa bedroom amenigomea. Huwezi kuamini tunalala mzungu wa nne huku akitishia kuomba talaka na kutoboa siri za mimali niliyoficha kama Freddie Chiluwa alivyobanikwa na bi mkubwa wake alipodai talaka.

Yaani huwezi kuamini. Kashafa na siri zangu za ulaji nilipokuwa na madaraka kijiweni zinaanza kufichuka. Mwenzenu roho inaniuma sina mfano.

Kwani nimemkana mwanangu mwenyewe ukiachia mbali ndoa yangu kuingia madoa kibao. Jina langu ndiyo usiseme. Kila mtu anajua mimi ni changupaka wa kutupa.

Hata maswahiba zangu hawaniruhusu kwenda majumbani mwao bila kuwepo kwa kuogopa nitawatongoza ama wake zao au vibinti vyao! Ama kweli hujafa hujaumbika walisema wahenga.

Nani alijua dume kama mimi ningetishiwa kuvikwa gagulo kutokana na tabia yangu ya chovya chovya na mulika mulika.

Je huko nje mko wangapi ambao arobaini yenu haijawadia kama yangu? Nanyi mkisoma mkasa wangu mnanicheka au mnanionea huruma? Natamani ningekua Jake Zumari aliyezaa na binti wa rafiki yake na wakakubali yaishe.

Hata hivyo ajue walikubali yaishe kutokana na kuwa na madaraka. Baada ya hapo linaweza kubumburuka tena akaumbuka.

Naona hiki kibinti kinakatiza na miguu mizuri kama ile. Sijui nikinyemelee? Loh! Kumbe sijamaliza balaa hili narukia jingine! Ngoja nijikate kabla mshirika wa bedroom hajanikuta akanivisha gagulo.
Chanzo: Tanzania Daima Mei 4, 2010.