Mafyatu wanapokuwa kama kuku, mbwa, na wawafugao

 

Kuna hiki kisa cha binadamu, kuku, na mbwa. Mbwa alimfyatua kuku wa mwenyewe. Acha kuku, mbwa, na wenyewe walaumiwe na kulaumiana kwa kuku kufyatuliwa na mbwa! Mwenye mbwa alimlaumu kuku na aliyemfuga kwa kujiruhusu na kuruhusu aliwe. Kisa hiki cha kufikirika na kufikirisha. Kina maswali na mafunzo mengi. Kwanini alaumiwe mbwa na si yule aliyemfuga kuku au mbwa? Kwani, kazi ya kuku ni nini kama siyo kuliwa? Kwanini kuku alijiachia na kukubali kufyatuliwa? Kwanini ana nyama inayoliwa na siyo isiyoliwa? Je, walitaka mbwa ale nini na kuku aliwe na nani? Mbwa, akila kuku, ni kosa ila binadamu hapana! Kuku, japo kazi yake ni kuliwa na kutaga mayai yaliwayo pia, akiliwa, analaumiwa! Ebo! Kuku lake ni kuliwa bila kujali kaliwa na binadamu, kicheche au mbwa. Kuku ni kuku lazima ataliwa tu.

 Uzuri ni kwamba mbwa hakujilaumu na hatajakaa ajilaumu kwa kumfyatua kuku. Kuna mafyatu wanakosea. Wanapaswa kuomba radhi hata kutubia kuwalaumu kuku na mbwa kulana. Kwani, wanakosea kwa kudhani wanawazodoa kuku na mbwa wakati ukweli ni kwamba wanajizodoa na kujiambia wenyewe kama siyo mafyatu wenzao.

Kinachoendelea kayani na lawama hizi ni ile hali ya kuwatupia lawama kuku na mbwa wakati wahusika ni nyinyi. Hata kesi yake ipelekwe mahakama kuu, kuku hatashinda kesi wala kuwa na haki zaidi ya kufugwa na kuliwa. Kwanini mnataka kumpaka kitimoto lipstick mkidhani atarembeka? Kitimoto ni kitimoto. Mnamsumbua kitimoto bure kama mnamsumbuavyo mbwa kwa kula kuku na kuku kuliwa na mbwa. Nani anamjali kuku? Nani anamuombolezea kuku? Kweli, kuku ana haki au ni kwa vile kaliwa na mbwa? Kuliwa ni kuliwa. Kuku aliwaye na mbwa hata simba hana tofauti na yule aliwaye na mafyatu. Anafyatuliwa tu. Hivi, kweli hawa wanaomtetea kuku wanamtetea au kutetea mlo wao? Kigombacho ni pale fyatu anapowala mafyatu wenzake halafu akawalaumu kwa kujiruhusu kufyatuliwa naye bila wala yeye kujilaumu au kukubali kulaumiwa.

Juzi, nilisika maboksi na mashehena yakitika ka debe tupu. Huu uliitwa muujiza na wanaojifanya wana dini wakati ni duni. Ajabu ya maajabu, hawaongelei wala kuhoji. Inakuwaje mafyatu wanaongelea amani na kuitenga haki wakati hawa ni mapacha? Kunani hapa? Eti walitetea mafyatu wale kuku kwa amani wakati wakijiganya hawajui wala kuona haki ya kuku! Hivi mwenye mbwa anapokuwa mbwa mwenyewe mtasema nini? Je, kwanini kumdhalilisha mbwa ambaye yuko radhi kumfia bwana wake ambaye hawezi hata kumlilia? Mheshimu mbwa tafadhali. Kwani, ni kiumbe mwaminifu na anayelinda hata wahalifu wamfugao.

Jikumbushe yafuatayo ndipo unene. Mbwa hulinda mali zenye thamani kubwa lakini hufa maskini. Sindano hushona nguo nyingi lakini daima iko uchi. Kijiko huungua kuchota chakula na mchuzi. Nini hufuata baada ya mwenye kushiba kushiba kama siyo kukiosha na kukikausha? Hatushangai uongo unapogeuka uogozi na uongozi kuwa uongo? Najua. Wengi mlikuwa wakati wa Ticha Mchonga.  Muelewe. Mambo yamebadilika na kuharibika au siyo? Kubalini. Wakati ule, mliona nuru. Leo, mtaona kiza totoro mtake msitake. Si shehe Ruksa aliwaonya kuwa kila zama ina kitabu chake?

 Tafuta hicho kitabu ukisome uelewe. Najua wengi ni wasomi tena wenye PhD ziwe za kweli au za kuzawadiwa, kununua, na kuhongwa. Wangapi wayajua mateso ya kuzisomea na kuzipata baada ya kuhangaishwa na maprofesa wenye wivu kuwa utakuwa kama wao? Kumbuka. Unasimamiwa wakati mwingine jitu ambalo kiakili haliwezi hata kugusa sole ya kiatu chako. Jiumbushe. Ni committee chairs wa PhD unaowakumbuka ambao hata kufikiri namna ya kufikiri hawajui? Si ajabu mjinga kumfundisha msomi au mwenye macho kuongozwa njia na kipofu. Ndo mambo ya siku hizi. Tusizinguane wala kuhadaana na kugeuzana mazwazwa wakati tuna akili. Tusijitoe ufahamu na kufanya ukuku wa kumtetea kuku au umbwa wa kumla kuku wa wenyewe.

Naona yule anashangaa! Unashangaa nini mwenye macho kuongozwa na kipofu mwanangu? Amka uchangamke. Usilaumu wasiolaumiwa. Jilaumu mwenyewe. Ikizidi ikapungua, lalamika lakini si kulaumu. Kwani, ni kosa la jinai tena kubwa kuliko uhaini na ugaidi. Wakubwa huwa hawakosei. Wakikosea, hawakosei wala kukosolewa.

 Wenye mbwa, huwa hawaaibishwi. Unalaumu kwanini mbwa kala kuku! Ebo! Mbwa akila kuku ni kosa la kuku siyo mbwa wala mwenye mbwa. Kama ukitaka kuwaingiza wamilki, mbwa akila kuku, kosa ni la mwenye kuku ambaye hakumfunga wala kumtahadharisha na mbwa. Kazi ya mbwa, kama kicheche na mafyatu, ni kula kuku. Na kazi ya kuku ni kutoliwa na mbwa japo ataliwa na wengine bila kujali ni nani na kwanini. Naomba utie akilini. Hii dunia ni ya mbwa si ya kuku.

Acha nisiwachoshe kabla hawajanichoka, kunichosha, kuniteka, na kunitesa kabla ya kuniua. Wajue. Wakiniteka, nawateka tutekane kama ilivyo kwa sasa ambapo mtekaji na mtekwaji wote ni mateka wa utekaji. Hivi, leo, nimekunywa gongo kiasi gani?

Chanzo: Mwananchi Jtano leo.

Letter from Canada à la authentic elections

 

There recently were botched and violet elections in Tanzania. Uganda is currently braced and geared for general elections next January. I wish it well. May these elections be credible, fair, free, and transparent. So be it. I’ve lived in Canada for over two decades. May I pull a leaf out of Canada’s book vis-à-vis how to conduct clear, credible, fair, and free elections? For, it offers positive insights. Thus, Uganda must (not can) learn and take a leaf from the Tanzania's lessons to avoid committing or repeating the same flaws.
            First, elections in Canada aren’t cutthroat and corrupts. For, voters vote for policies not parties and personalities. To win an election in Canada, present sound policies that respond to voters’ aspirations and interests altogether. Hence, the system here doesn’t allow, accommodate, or tolerate any sort of corruption or malpractices. Candidates squarely get what they deserve.
            Secondly, there aren’t expensive or pompous campaigns. In my town of approximately 4,400 people of about 17 years, I’ve never seen any campaign meeting. Not one, not once. When it is time for elections, the Electoral Commission set a date for elections. Public places are used to cast vote. 

                There are four ways of voting in Canada. One can vote on election day by going to a polling station and cast one’s vote or by advance polling days, which is before the voting day. If one doesn’t want to or can’t vote in the above category, can do so at any Elections Canada office or by mail. For those who want to vote in the last category,  provides his or her postal address to the Election Canada, which posts a voting kit ready for casting it.
            Thirdly, with such a system, there are no huge campaign meetings everywhere in the country. There also no chaos or cheating or rigged. Furthermore, there are no inducements or coercion since people here vote for policy not personalities or parties. This system has proved to be efficient and effective for both candidates and voters so to speak.
            Fourthly, Canada started voting in 1867. Canada is a multiparty country. It has many big and small political parties such as the Liberal Party of Canada, a centre-left political party that has historically been one of the two dominant parties in Canada; the Conservative Party of Canada, a centre-right political party that emerged from the merger of the Canadian Alliance and the Progressive Conservative Party; and the New Democratic Party (NDP), a left-wing party that advocates for social democracy and progressive policies.
            Others are the Bloc Québécois, a federal political party that promotes Quebec nationalism and advocates for the interests of Quebecers; and the Green Party of Canada, which focuses on environmental issues and sustainability, advocating for green policies and practices. These are the bigger parties, which are a must have in every general election.
            Other registered parties are the People's Party of Canada, a right-wing party that emphasises individual freedom and limited government intervention; the Christian Heritage Party, a socially conservative party that promotes Christian values in politics; and the Libertarian Party of Canada, which advocates for civil liberties, free markets, and minimal government intervention in personal lives, among others. Nevertheless, the top three are the dominant players in the politics of Canada.
            Fifthly, due to being corruption proof, I have never heard of any electoral corruption case. I tried to research in the archives and got none whatsoever. That said, that’s why Canada’s political system remains one of the world’s most stable and respected democracies.
            Sixthly, why are there no corruption in Canada’s elections? There are many answers among which are the fact that, in Canada as opposed to Africa, politics isn’t a moneymaking endeavour. Firstly, people run for political positions to serve people but not to serve themselves and families. Secondly, no politician, even though there can be a few, stays in a position for forlornly long. Specifically, since President Museveni came to power, Canada’s had seven Prime Ministers compared to our southern neighbour, the US with 8 Presidents.
            Finally, no party’s ever won more than 50-odd percent in four decades. Therefore, in Canada, neither party nor its leader has ever dreamt of winning with a bigger percentage as we recently evidenced in Tanzania where current President, despite bedlam and bloodbath, miraculously ‘won’ 98 percent! So, you know.
Source: Daily Monitor Sunday today.

Lugha yaweza kudumisha au kubomoa ndoa

   Tutaanza na kisa cha wanandoa A na B waliomo kwenye ndoa hatarishi. Wapendwa hawa wamedumu kwenye ndoa yenye misukosuko, visa, na visasi visiyo vya lazima kwa miaka sasa. Kwa umri wao na wa ndoa yao, ungedhani wangetulia, kulea watoto, na kujiandalia maisha ya utu uzima. Hata hivyo, si hivyo. Badala ya ndoa kuwa kimbilio, bahati mbaya, kwao, imegeuka mateso kwa pande zote. Kila uchao, wako kwa waganga, wachungaji, marafiki, hata wazazi kusaka ushauri juu ya namna ya kuboresha na kuokoa ndoa yao inayoyumba kwa muda mrefu.
            Katika kuwasikiliza, tuligundua yafuatayo ambayo wengi wanaweza kuyapuuzia wakitafuta mchawi wakati mchawi ni wao:
            Mosi, hawana siri. Ugomvi mdogo tu, kila mmoja anatafuta majirani, marafiki, ndugu, mashoga, washauri, na wengine kutafuta msaada! Kumbukeni. Mlipokutana na kukubaliana kuoana, mlikuwa pekee yenu. Mkivunja ndoa yenu, wao pia, hawataathirika zaidi ya kuwacheka hata kuwang’onga na kuwaona wa hovyo. Jifunzeni kutunza siri zenu hata kama mtaambiwa za wengine. Kama ni ushauri, siyo kila umuendeaye atakushauri vizuri. Mjue. Kila mtu ana ushauri ila si kila ushauri ni bora.
            Pili, hawaheshimiani. Tushaambwa. Heshima si utumwa na ni kitu cha bure chenye thamani. Msingi mmojawapo wa ndoa ni kuheshimiana. Hakuna uungwana unaoweza kukuza na kuzidisha upendo kama wawili kuheshimiana. Tunajua. Nyinyi si malaika. Pia, si mashetani. Mkiheshimiana, mtapendana na kuthaminiana na si kubomoana msijue mnajibomoa wenyewe. Msipoheshimiana, mtadharauliana na kudharauliwa hata na msiotegemea kama vile watoto wenu. Hata hao mnaowapelekea umbea juu ya tofauti hata ugomvi wenu, wanawananga na kuwadharau kwa uzembe huu. Não, wanayo yao.
            Tatu, wana lugha mbaya. Wanabagazana, kudhalilishana, kufokeana, na kutukanana tena mbele ya watoto wasijue wanavyowaharibu na kujiharibia. Kama matusi ndilo chaguo lenu za kuibua hoja na kupoza hasira, basi nendeni faraghani mtukanane mmalize na kuchoka. Kwanini kuwahusisha wasiohusika? Je, inasaidia nini zaidi ya kuongeza matatizo kwenu na wasio husika? Kama mna tofauti au ugomvi, nenda chumbani, au toka muende faraghani mfokeane hadi mchoke.
            Nne, hawaaminiani. Msipojiamini na kuaminiana, wengine hawatawaamini. Kuaminika huzaa kuaminika. Kadhalika, kutoaminiana huzaa kutoaminiwa. Kutoaminiana ni zao la kutojiamini. Je, mtaaminiwaje wakati hamjiamini wala kuaminiana?
            Tano, wanadharauliana. Watu wanaweza kuheshimiana bila kudharauliana. Katika hili, wahusika uheshimu mipaka yao na ya wenzao. Wadharaulianapo, mjue. Watadharauliwa. Kuliepuka hili, mhusika asijidharau, kudharauliwa, au kumdharau mwenziwe.
            Sita, wanashindana. Ndoa si mashindano bali kukubaliana kuishi na kufanya mambo pamoja kwa faida yenu wote. Kama mke ni mwili wa mume na mume ni mwili wa mke, nani awezaye kushindana na mwili wake? 

    Tunaposema mke na mume ni mwili mmoja, tunamaanisha matendo na siyo kuchukua miili miwili na kuiunganisha kibaolojia bali kijamii na kimahusiano. Ashindanaye na mwenzie, anashindana na yeye mwenyewe. Ni sawa na paka au panya kukimbiza mkia wake au mtu kukimbia kivuli chake. Hakuna mshindi wanandoa washindanapo.
    Sasa wahusike wafanye nini?
        Kuna njia nyingi za kuepuka hayo tuliyotaja hapo juu.
Kwanza, ni kuelewa kuwa hayajengi wala kuimarisha ndoa bali kuibomoa. Hivyo, jibu ni kufanya mambo kinyume. Kacheni mliyokuwa mifanya. Mtaona matokeo yake na kushangaa. Jaribu muone.
        Pili, fanyeni tathmini ya matendo na ndoa yenu. Katika kufanya hivyo, ainisheni hasara na faida (kama zipo) juu ya matendo yanu hatarishi.
        Tatu, kuweni wawazi baina kwelikweli ili kulijua na kuliona tatizo pamoja na kutafuta suluhu pamoja kwa sababu athari za matendo yenu huwaathiri pamoja. Dawa ya uchafu ni usafi. Na dawa ya migogoro ni amani na kukubaliana kuishi kwa amani na kuacha yote yale yanayowakwaza. Mjue. Mnajikwaza wenyewe. Hivyo, mwaweza kujiondoa kwenye vikwazo wenyewe mkiamua. Hamna mchawi bali nyinyi wenyewe. Je, wapo wangapi kama hawa?
        Mwisho, tunasisitiza. Waathirika badilini tabia na mwelekeo. Fanyani tofauti na mlivyozoea kufanyiana. Mtaona mabadiliko makubwa. Kimsingi, hakuna mchawi bali nyinyi wenyewe. Hivyo, msipoteze fedha na muda kutafuata mchawi. Mnaye baina yenu.
Chanzo: Mwananchi Jpili leo.

Nimeamriwa kufungua hekalu la God la KGBJRJFRM

 Nikiwa sina hili wala lile, juzi, nilitokewa na Malaika wa Bwana akaniminyaminya na kuniamru nianzishe Kanisa ili kuikoa dunia hii inayoangamizwa na uzwazwa. Mwanzoni nilikataa kufanya hivyo nikidhani ni ndoto tu. Mara ya pili, si nilimezwa na samaki aina ya changu kwa siku tatu kule Manzese mpaka Bi Mkubwa alipostuka wakati nilikuwa napitia kwenye majaribio aliyopitia Yona yule mjanja aliyemezwa na Nyangumi wa kike kwa siku tatu. Hayo tuyaache.
         Baada ya juzi kusikia Askopo moja wa kujipachia ambaye duka lake la kuchuuza na kuuza roho za mafyatu waliokata tamaa na kutapatapa, si nikaijiwa na wazo la kifyatu la kufyatua njuluku kirahisi. Hapa, lazima nifyatue ukweli. Lazima nifyatue njuluku tena kiulani. Soon, sitaitwa Fyatu kapuku bali Fyatu mkwasi. Najuta. Sijui kwanini nilipoteza muda vyuoni wakati kuna fursa rahisi kwa hata vilaza na vihiyo kupiga njuluku ndefu! Maana, unene wa NGO kama hii ni wa kujipachika. Auhitaji kupiga shule mpaka ukafyatuka na kuonekana chizi.
            Kusema ule ukweli, tuache utani. Sikuamini kusikia madai ya ajabu kuwa ndata wetu waaminifu na watiifu waliokuwa wakilinda duka hilo la Ufu na Uendawazimu eti walikwapua mabilioni! Du! Wamejua kutufyatua! Inakuwaje kwa mwizi anaiba mwizi kama kweli njuluku ilipigwa? Kumbe mkuki ni kwa nguruwe!  Hekalu la Sir God na njuluku wapi na wapi wakati mwana wa Adam alikuja na kuondoka akiwa kapuku? Ajabu, wezi, sorry, wapigaji wenye roho mtakakitu wakimuita roho mtakatifu wanawafyatua mafyatu wasiofyatuka na kuhoji kuwa wanamhubiri mwana wa Adam huyu ambaye mie namjua kwa sababu ni wa ukoo wangu.
            Jina la kanisa langu linaitwa The Kasri of all God's, All Binadams and Jinni for Redemption and Jannah Firdaws Roho Mtakakitu Mtakatifu (KGBJRJFRMM). Usishangae urefu na utata wa jina la nyenzo yangu. Kuwapata mazwazwa wakaamini umepiga vitabu lazima utumie kimombo na majina marefu. Pia, lengo jingine ni kuunganisha din izote na kuepuka mchezo wa kutumia dini, udini, na udini kuwagawanya na kuwadhoofisha mafyatu japo hawafutuki na kushutukia huu ufyatuaji tunaotumia kuwafyatua.
        Kuwafyatua mafyatu vizuri, lazima nishughulikie matatizo yote Hivyo, wale wote wenye matatizo kama vile uzwazwa, umaskini, ugumba, uchungu, huzuni, mawazo, wasiwasi, waliovimbiwa, wenye njaa, waliotekwa, waliopotezwa nk.nk. Mie nitawapatia majibu ya matatizo yenu yote. Unatoa sadaka kidogo au kununua maji ya uzima na matatizo yako yote yanaisha hapo hapo. Mfano, shoo yangu ya kwanza ni kuahidi kumfufua Aminia Mfupa au kujifanya nimepooza halafu nikajitibu mwenye japo ukweli ni kwamba mganga hajigangi. Nitahakikisha natengeza maji ya uzima ambayo nitayajaza urahibu ili atakayeyaonja awe anarudi kununua mengine nami nafyatua njuluku. Hapa, dhambi iko wapi? Si tuliaswa kwa wajinga ndio waliwao?
            Najua wengi wataanza wivu wa kizwazwa. Watahoji kwanini mwana wa Adam alihubiri umaskini nami nataka njuluku. Simpo. Ufalme waliwao ni wa mbinguni. Sie, wajanja ufalme wetu ni wa hapa duniani. Msishangae. Kwanza, kuna vishawishi vingi ambavyo muovu sheitwan kaniletea. Mfano, ukifungua duka la kawaida TrA wanakuandamana wakati la kiroho hakuna kulipa kodi japo unawatoza wachovu kodi. Pia, kwa kutumia hii nyenzo, naweza kuingiza bidhaa zangu toka ughaibuni tena zisizo za kiriho na za wengine free. Hawa, nitakaowasaidia kutumia nyenzo yangu kupitisha bidhaa zao, lazima niwatoze kodi mwenyewe japo sitozwi. Nani hataki ulaji huu wa dezo tena unaotaka ubunifu na kutumia akili kiduchu?
            Kwa vile wachovu hawana njuluku kama nitakazowakamua, nitawahimiza wamtegemee Mungu awalinde. Ila nashauri wasishangae kwanini mimi nitakuwa nalindwa na mabaunsa. Ni kwa sababu shetani anayeniandama ahitaji kupambana na Mungu bali mabaunsa. Ili kuhakikisha nafaidi hii fursa na ubunifu mpya, nitahakikisha natumia hii kitu yangu kugombea urahis. Maana, nao nimegundua ahuhitaji elimu wala chochote isipokuwa urahisi na utayari kuhomola na kuhondomola. Hapa, lazima nijifunze kwa tapelo mmoja aliyewahi kucheza haka kamchezo. Si alijiunga na chata twawala hadi akazawadiwa uhishimiwa hadi alipolikoroga akataka kuwatumia waliomtumia ili watumiane wakaishia kumtimua na kufunga duka lake akabakia kubweka kama dogi tena akijifanya kulaani yale aliyokuwa akiyashabikia zama zile za Mwendaze. Hapa, nitachanganya duni na siasa japo twaonya kuwa havichanganyikani. Mbona vinachanganyikana. Upaswacho kufanya ni kupiga siasa ukiwa ndani ya chata twawala. Duni na siasa japo vyote ni duni, havichanganyikani kama uko upingajini kwa akina Tunda Lishe.
           Ili kupiga njuluku ndefu, nitaanzisha mradi wa Kutenda miujiza. Hapa, lazima ‘nifufue’ wafu na kuponya vilema. Naona yule anashangaa. Kwani, kufanya mazingaombwe, sorry miujiza ni vigumu hivyo? Si unacheza mchezo na kupandikiza vilema feki ambao mkipata mnagawana. Unacheza na miujiza? Ukiachia hadithi na ngano za kufikirika na amewahi kuitenda?
            Mwisho, nitajipachika mavyeo mazito. Kuanzia leo, naitwa Alhaj, Mtakatifu, Mchunaji, sorry, Mchungaji, Askopo, sorry, Askofu, Kardinali, Papa, Paroko, Bruda, Darwesh, Daktari, Profesa, Maulana Muadhama, Shehena, sorry, shehe Ulama, n.k, n.k, etc. Hivi, nani walinileta hapa Mirembe?
Chanzo: Mwananchi leo Jtano.

Rasmi natangaza Ufalme wa Fyatuland

Kuanzia sasa, Fyatuland si jamhuri tena. Ni ufalme wa Fyatu Mfyatuaji awafyatuaye mafyatu atakavyo wasifyatuke wakamfyatua. Kuwafyatua vilivyo, juzi niliwafyatua mafyatu mkenge. Walinipigia kelele wanataka domoghasia aka demokrasia. Sikusita. Kwangu, hii ilikuwa fursa ya kuwafyatua vilivyo tena bila aibu wala huruma. Niliitisha uchaguzi ambao wapinzani wangu waliuita uchafuzi. Nilishangaa. Nani alimchafua nani wakati nilichofanya ni kufyatua? Ajabu, wengi wanaolalamika na kupiga zegele ni wale waliosusa sisi tukachukua na kuweka mwaa. Sasa twala. Viroho vinawauma kwa ngoa na wivu. Mshindwe kama mlivyoshindwa kwenye uchaguzi kumbaffuni kabisa. Kuanzia sasa, hakuna uchaguzi. Sitaki presha.

            Juzi, nilisikia mafyatu wakizoza na kuzodoa kuwa hakuna haki! Ebo! Nani kawafyatua mkenge na kuwadanganya? Guniani hakuna haki. Ukitaka haki, nenda kaichukue ilivyo. Nani kakwambia haki inaombwa? Haki huwa haiombwi bali kupokwa mafyatu wangu.

            Mafyatu bila kujua nitawafyatua, si waliingia mkenge nikawafyatua kwa kushinda kwa aslimia 1000. Ngoja walalamike wengine wakitishia kufyatuka na kunifyatua. Nami sikujivunga. Niliwafyatulia mbali viherehere waliojitoa ufahamau. Niliamrisha migambo yangu kumfyatua yeyote ajitieaye kunihoji au kunipinga wakati sihojiwi wala sipingwi. Wacha mafyatu waipate. We! Walifyatuliwa kwa mamia hadi wakatia akili. Natangaza rasmi. Kwanza, sichezewi. Pili, sijali. Tatu, kuwakomesha na kuwaonyesha kuwa mie sifyatuliwi, natangaza ufalme. Mambo ya demokrasia naona yanatuletea ghasia bila sababu. Tangu lini eti vitoto vilivyofyatuliwa jana vinahoji ulaji na unene wa wanene wakati vyenyewe si vinene? Vitanenaje na nini wakati vyenyewe si vinene? Sijui kwanini havielewi. Mshaambwa vitoi ni taifa la kesho. Ila siku hizi vinasema kuwa vyenyewe ni taifa la leo, kesho, na kesho kutwa! Mnataka mibuyu tule polishi? Vingine vinahoji hata uteuzi wangu? Vinalalamika eti nateua vitegemezi vyangu na shahiba yangu. Ebo!

            Kwa kuhofia ufyatu wa mafyatu, natangaza ufamilia, sorry, ufalme ili kuwa na uhakika kwa kuula na kufyatua bila bughudha. Hivyo basi, kuanzia sasa, sirkal yangu itakuwa ya kifalme ambapo ni vitegemezi vyangu, wake au waume zao ndiyo watakaounda lisirkal la mafyatu. Pia, nitateua vitegemezi vya washikaji wangu ili kuondoa wasi wasi wa kufyatuliwa nikajikuta pakanga bila sababu. Kwani ni kosa kutangaza ufalme wa ukoo wa kifalme hata kama ni kwa mlango wa nyuma? Kuanzia sasa, mtoi wangu Moja aka Wanune kwa kitasha, atakuwa waziri kwenye sirkal pamoja na hubby wake Moha we! Koma. Namaanisha Modicai Nchengeta ili kulinda ulaji wa familia ya kifalme. Hii ni sayansi ya siasa ya kisasa alonifunza dugu yangu kaka Joe Mseventy. Kama surname yako ni ya kichovu, unataka nani akuteue na ili iweje? Jamani, ngojeni zamu yenyu. Kutesa mshaambwa ni kwa zamu. Jamani, Nadhani watasha wa Ushoto mtanisamehe msije niambia mani ja mwenye

            Kama kwa Joji Kichaka Tarampu ameteua vitegemezi, wakwe, na maswahiba zake, kosa langu liko wapi? Mbona kule Equtorial Guinea dingi ni prezo na kitegemezi chake ni makamu wake? Kwanini kwangu iwe nongwa wakati siku hizi mambo ni kula kifamilia? Kwa wasiojua mantiki ya kufyatua niliyofyatua, kama daktari mwenye shahada kali sana, nataka kuonyesha kuwa demokrasia ya kitasha haina nafasi hapa. Huku ndiko kujikomboa kisiasa kusikokubaliana na kujikomba. Kufyatua zaidi, kuanzia sasa, hakuna kukopa wala kubomu. Tutakula njuluku za hapa hapa liwalo na liwe.

            Ili kutowaacha patupu maswahiba zangu, Mamadou kitegemezi cha Thubutu Kombania kitakuwa kwenye sirkal yangu pamoja na Riziki kitegemezi cha rafiki yangu yule Kiwete nacho kinaula. Kuwaudhi na kukomesha kidomodomo na ushakunaku vya mashakunaku na mashambenga, ninapanua sirkal yangu ambayo lazima waikubali watake wasitake wafyatuke wasifyatuke. Mie kisiasa ni alpha na omega. Ukijitia kufyatuka, nakumega na kukufyatua kama siyo kukuteka, kukupoteza, na kukunyotoa roho. Msinijaribu wala kunitania. Sijaribiwi, kutania, wala kutaniwa.

            Jambo jingine, ili kuhakikisha kila mshikaji anafyatua, natangaza kupanua sirkal yangu. Najua wanoko watazoza. Sasa bila sirkal kuwa kubwa ukubwa utakuwa na maana gani? Kwanini mnahangaishwa na ukubwa wa sirkal kana kwamba hakuna njuluku za kuiendesha? Hapa lazima niongeze kodi ili kuongeza mapato ya sirkal ya kuwawezesha washikaji zangu nami kujinomi kinomi au siyo? Nitatengeza nafasi kwa ajili ya maswahiba zangu na maswahiba zao. Nitahakikisha kila mshikaji anapata pa kushika ili tule kwa kujinafasi. Mwenye wivu si ajinyonge tu. Nani aliwambia mfyatuliwe kwenye familia maskini zisizojua kushika patamu na kula utamu? Utamu si wa kila fyatu. Una wenyewe na wenyewe ni sisi. Si mnisifie kidogo jamanini.

            Nimalizie kwa onyo kali. Kuanzia leo, hakuna fyatu anaruhusiwa kuhoji, kukosoa, kupinga, kulalamika, kulaani bali kusifia. Atakayekaidi amri hii ya kifalme, ajue. Atakuwa anatenda uhaini. Na adhabu yake mnaijua. Hivyo, kaeni chonjo, saa mbaya. Kumbe naweweseka usingizini. Ukisoma hii puuzia ni ndoto tu.

Chanzo: Mwananchi Jtano leo.

Can Museveni ‘fight’ over Indian Ocean?

I hate playing devil’s advocate. Today, I’ll do so. I’ll make a case for President Yoweri Museveni with regards to his recently misconstrued message to Africa. I know Museveni as a humorous person. Whenever he speaks, expect him to crack some jokes and send coded messages to whomever he targets. When Museveni said that the Indian Ocean belongs to him, which is true, and he’d go to war with Kenya over it in the future, not many understood him. 

After Museveni jokingly let the cat out of the bag, internet was awash with condemnations, lampoons, memes, and rebukes from Kenyans who were pointlessly up in arms baying for his blood. Guys, keep your cool.
        Museveni speaks allegorically and philosophically. Besides, at his age, he speaks as if he does to his grandkids. Museveni is right. The Indian ocean is his simply because he enjoys its uses. His goods to and from abroad go through this ocean. Those naively lampooning him should know. 

If Uganda wasn’t landlocked–––don’t ask me about who locked it–––you all know––– how’d they make a killing out of brine, which no one can drink or shower with? Thus, when he says the Indian Ocean is his, use your brains a wee bit–––it means that everything on the African continent belongs to all Africans be they on it or in diaspora. The same applies to the oil found in Uganda. It belongs to every African.

    Those who know Museveni very well will concur with me. He actually didn’t mean war as he’s misconstrued but something else apart from his targets whom I don’t know if accurately got his coded message humbly say that Muzei didn’t mean war but something else, namely a true unification of Africa beginning with the East African Community. The war he means is philosophical but not a military confrontation. 

    If anything, Museveni cut the first turf aimed to be an ice breaker in this matter after being sick and tired of hocus-pocus, which the EAC member states have maintained vis-à-vis its true unification and of Africa at large. Again, apart from postcolonial presidents including Museveni, whom else can we blame for our division? Haven’t they been frustrating the process to cling on our statehouses and their entitlements and pomp?

    Those who are pointlessly and wrongly attacking Muzei are horribly off the mark. At his senescence, Muzei knows that his time on earth is shorter than the one he’s already clocked. I remember. Nyerere who died younger than Muzei, after exiting power, once warned that the ujanja ujanja or arrogance they use in elections were long gone. He used to run against the shadow and win for close to100% then during the cold war era that propped all sorts of political gimmicks for the benefit of the two belligerent superpowers.
         As for Muzei,  he aims at warning the East Africans that they need to put their house in order. This reminds me of my book Africa Unite or Perish. Besides, of all African postcolonial president, it’s Dr. Kwame Nkrumah, Ghanaian founder who espoused Africa’s fast-track union while Julius Nyerere who outfoxed him preferred a bit-by-bit unification of Africa that’s never materialised.
        In sum, before attacking each other, ask yourself. Who asked God to create water aka ocean for him or her and deny it to others? By the bye, why’d we fight over brine that we can’t even drink or shower with? Africa unite or perish. In this case in point, please, examine what is said not who is saying it. Museveni indeed is not supposed to be condemned but thanked for saying it honestly and point blank.
Source" Daily Monitor Sunday today.

Ni hatari wanandoa kuishi mbalimbali

Tokana na uzoefu, kwa kuona au kusikia, tunajua wanandoa wanaoishi maisha ya utengano usio na ulazima au sababu. Wanatenganishwa na aina na mihangaiko ya maisha kama kufanyia kazi sehemu tofauti. Pia, wapo wanaoishi mbali mbali tokana na mazoea na mila za baadhi ya jamii. Mfano, kuna jamii au makabila yanayoamini kuwa lazima wawe na mashamba na mifugo vijijini walikozaliwa. Hivyo, mara nyingi, mama ndiyo hupewa jukumu la kuangalia mali za familia huko kijijini. Utasikia mtu anasema kuwa mke wangu anaishi kijijini kuangalia ng’ombe au mashamba. Hukuoa wala mkeo kuwa mke wa ng’ombe, mbuzi, kuku, na mashamba bali mwenzi wako wa karibu anayepaswa kuwa nawe wakati wowote.
            Japo wanalazimishwa na maisha, je, hilo ndilo jibu au njia pekee ya kuweza kuishi kwa ufanisi bila kujitesa hata kuwatesa watoto wao? Je, wanaofanya hivyo, wanajua madhara ya kufanya hivyo? Hivi, hakuna njia nyingine ya kuishi pamoja na wahusika wakakuza uchumi wao?
            Leo, tunadurusu  ndoa ya kuishi mbali mbali na madhara yake. Tunajua. Ili familia ifanikiwe na kustawi lazima iwe na kipato. Hata hivyo, kwanini uchumi uchukue nafasi ya mambo mengine? Kwa wanaojua raha na adha za ndoa, kuishi mbali mbali kunaweza kuwa chanzo kikubwa cha kuregarega na kuvunjika ndoa.
            Kuishi mbali husababisha upweke si kwa wanadoa tu bali hata watoto kiasi cha kuleta changamoto katika malezi ya watoto. Wakikuyu Kenya na makabila mengine karibu yote ya Kenya ukiondoa ya Pwani, wana utamaduni wa kwenda mijini kutafuta na kuwaacha wake zao walee watoto peke yao. Nini madhara ya hili? Watoto huwa karibu na mama zao na kuwathamini kuliko baba zao japo huwahangaikia na kuwawezesha kimalezi kujiandaa kwa ajili ya maisha ya baadaye ambapo wahusika watakuwa wameishiwa uwezo kiasi cha kuwategemea wasipate msaada waliotegemea wala kukusudia.
            Sisi ni wazazi. Tunajua mapenzi ya wazazi kwa Watoto ingawa wakati mwingine mapenzi yanaweza kuwajengea chuki dhidi ya wazazi wote au mzazi mmojawapo. Kwa uzoefu wetu, tunawashauri wazazi wasiwaishie watoto bali wawandae kuyapokea, kuyakubali, na kuyakabili majukumu yao ya baadaye watakapokua badala ya kujiumiza na kuwaumiza kwa kuwaandalia urithi wa vitu ambayo wengi huvifuja tokana na ukosefu wa uzoefu na maandalizi. Mnapowaishia watoto au kutaka muwaachie kila kitu, wakikua watafanya nini? Tunashauri wazazi wawafundishe watoto kujitegemea kwa kuwaandaa kifani na kisaikolojia bila kujiumiza ukihangaika na kuwaachia watoto eti mali. Japo si vibaya, je wao watakapokua watafanyia nini akili na vipaji vyao? Kwetu, urithi mkubwa kwa watoto ni kuwazaa, kuwandaa kwa kesho yao ambayo ni tofauti na ya wazazi tena wengi ambao hawakurithi hata kijiko zaidi ya kuzaliwa.
            Hakuna urithi mkubwa kama vile kuzaliwa, kulelewa, na kuandaliwa kwa ajii ya maisha ya baadaye ambao ni bora kuliko fedha, mali, na vitu. Wapo wazazi waliolelewa na kusoma kwa taabu. Wakishapata fedha, huwaharibu watoto wao wakichelea wasipitie magumu waliyopitia wasijue ndiyo shule pekee iliyowafanya wafanikiwe. Kwa mfano, unampeleka mtoto International School kwa vile wewe hukuisomea au kushindana na majirani na ndugu. Akimaliza, unagundua umetengeneza kuku wa kizungu. Unafanya nini zaidi ya kumlaumu na kumuona mwanao kuwa mzembe usijue maandalizi aliyopata kule hayafanani na uhalisia wa maisha? Hili la malezi ya kisasa, tutalipa Makala yake maalum.
            Mbali na ugumu wa malezi ya watoto, kuishi mbali mbali kunaweza kuwa chanzo cha vishawishi pande zote hasa lijapo suala la ‘stahiki’ ya wanandoa kimapenzi. Je, huwa wahusika wanafanyaje lijapo suala hili au tuseme tendo la ndoa ambalo katika ndoa ni lazima na muhimu? Ndiyo maana likaitwa tendo la ndoa. Hatupendi kuwahukumu, ila kuna uwezekano wa wanandoa wa aina hii kuwa na namna ya kulipata kiharamu japo si wote na pia, yawezekana wengine wakaishi pamoja na bado wakachepuka. Hilo, tunaliacha kama swali na changamoto kwa wanandoa kutafuta jibu.
            Tumalizie kwa kusema. Ni hatari kwa wanandoa na watoto wao kuishi mbali mbali. Msihangaishwe na kesho ya watoto wenu. Kwani, kama mlivyoweza nyinyi, nao wataweza.
Chanzo: Mwananchi Jpili leo.

Inakuwaje Fyatu Mzima Anajigeuza au Kugeuzwa Mdudu?

Kunguni na chawa ni mojawapo ya wadudu wachafu, na hatari bila kusahau wawafugao miongoni mwa viumbe waliolaaniwa tangu walipoumbwa. Ni dhalili, dhalimu, katili, na tegemezi. Hawana akili, aibu, maarifa, wala huruma. Ni hatari, hatarishi, na wabaya hakuna mfano. Hunyonya hata maiti na mizoga. Ni watumwa wa matumbo yao yasiyoshiba. Huishi kwa kunyonya wengine na kuwasababishia hasara, maradhi, mateso, usumbufu, na vifo. Maumivu ya mirija yao ni makali. Wanaweza kushindana na mbu na funza katika hili. Wanachukiwa na binadamu na wanyama kwa matendo yao ya hovyo na machafu. Ili waishi na kushamiri, wadudu hawa lazima kuwepo na uchafu na watu wachafu wa kuwafuga na kuwalisha kwa faida na sababu wasijuavyo japo ni hatarishi na za hovyo.

Tukiachana na wadudu hawa, kuna mambo wanaweza kutufunza hasa pale binadamu mzima na akili yake anapojigeuza au kugeuzwa mdudu akafanya vitu ambavyo hata wadudu wasingefanya wangekuwa binadamu. Juzi, katika pitapita zangu, nilishuhudia na kusikia mambo ya ajabu.
Mosi, nikiwa mkoa fulani pembezoni mwa kaya, nilimsikia kwa masikio yangu na kumuona kwa macho yangu yote matatu kupe mmoja ajiitaye kiongozi akiongopa mchana kweupe bila aibu wala hofu huku akijigeuza kupe ili kuwashinda chawa. Jamaa, alijitoa kimasomaso na kumpigia kampeni mgombea ‘pinzani’ akagoma kufanya hivyo kwa mgombea wa chama chake. Je, hakujua alichokuwa akifanya? Alihongwa? Alikuwa akijipendekeza ili apewe udohoudoho tena wa aibu? Si rahisi kujibu swali hili na mengine mengi.
            Pili, nilijiuliza bila majibu. Inakuwaje fyatu mzima na akili zake tena mzito kuliko Kabwela anakubali, iwe kwa hiari, kuhongwa, hata kulazimishwa, kujigeuza au kugeuza mdudu. Ili iweje? Kwanini ukubali kuwa mdudu na siyo simba kama unapenda sana kuwa mnyama? Japo wadudu hawafanyi uchangudoa wa kimaadili, kidudu mtu ni changudoa wa kisiasa. Huvi ndiyo njia pekee iliyobaki ya kupata mahitaji, riziki, na ulaji wake? Wewe unamchukuliaje kidudu fyatu huyu? Matumbo yetu yasitufanye tufanyiwe vitu vibaya. Baya zaidi, wanaofanyiwa huu udhalilishaji wana watoi. Sijui wanawafundisha nini watoi wao na wengine?
            Tatu, nilifyatuka na kushangaa, kukasirika, kuhuzunika, na kuudhika. Inakuwaje ‘kiongozi’tena wa chama kinachojiita pinzani, kumwacha mgombea wake, tena baada ya yeye kukacha kugombea urahisi, na kumpigia mgombea pinzani? Hivi hawa siyo wanachamana wa siri wanachojidai kupinga wakati wanaunga? Kweli, huyu anaweza kuaminika hata kwa wanyama?
            Nne, zaidi ya kiongozi huyu muongo ambaye kwake uongozi ni uongo na uroho, ni nini kama siyo kunguni au kupe mtu? Je, anamdanganya nani zaidi ya kujidanganya mwenyewe akidhani anawadanganya mafyatu? Inasikitisha sina mfano kwa ‘kiongozi’ tena mzito kufanya mambo kikunguni na kikupe.
            Tano, tumekuwa tukiwasakama chawa na wale wawafugao tusijue wataibuka hata funza, kunguni, na kupe waje kuturarua na kutuambukiza maradhi kama huyu kupe mtu ninayemjadili leo. Hivi, inakuwaje binadamu mzima mwenye akili timamu, macho, na mikono akatenda kama mdudu na asione aibu wala kuhisi uzito wa dhambi anayojitendea na kuwatendea wengine?
            Sita, kinachogomba na kuuma ni ile hali ya mafyatu kufyatuliwa kuwa uchafu na uchafuzi huu nao ni uchaguzi. Uchaguzi gani usio na wapinzani? Uchaguzi gani ambapo vyama ABCD...Z ‘vinashindana’ vyenyewe. Katika mchezo huu mchafu, kinachoumiza zaidi ni kuunguza na kufyatua njuluku za mafyatu kwa viini macho. Si timu itangaze mteule yake badala ya kupoteza muda na njuluku za mafyatu kapuku? Hata hivyo, nisizoze na kulaumu sana. Hapa, wa kulaumiwa ni mafyatu au wanaowafyatua?
            Saba, japo ni haki ya mtu kuchagua atatakacho, inakuwaje mja anajigeuza mdudu ili ajaze tumbo lisiloshiba asihofie Mungu na kesho? Je, hapa anayewafyatua mafyatu na mafyatu nani alaumiwe? Huku si kukubali kuliwa kwa hiari yao? Je, wakishafanya na kufanyiwa udhalilishaji huu, watakuwa na haki ya kulalamika au kulaumu? Wamlalamikie au kumlaumu nani wakati yote wanasababisha wao wenyewe kwa kukataa kufyatuka na kufyatua kiasi cha kujiruhusu wafyatuliwe hata na wadudu wasio na akili, maarifa, wala nguvu? Jamani, tunamkomoa nani ili iwe nini na kwanini? Kweli, mafyatu na ufyatu wetu tunashindwa hata kuwapondaponda au kuwasafishia mbali hawa wadudu ambao sasa wanaanza kujifanya hawahusiki na mateso yetu? Inakuwaje wadudu wanaonekana kutuzidi akili hadi tunakubali watufyatue tena kirahisi hivi?
            Nashaurini mafyatu kuepuka uchawa, ufunza, ukunguni, ukupe, na ududu kwa gharama zozote. Kwani, mtajikuta pakanga kama kaya. Licha ya kudhalilisha na kuumiza, hali hizi hudumaza ubunifu na uthubutu kiasi cha fyatu mzima kukubali kujigeuza au kugeuzwa jidudu. Shame on you vidudu watu muwe wafugaji au wafugwao. Heri kufa njaa kuliko kukubali aibu, jinai, na shibe hii ya kudhalilishwa na kudhalilisha. Mtaliwa mkijiona. Shauri yenu. Sitaki, siku moja, mseme sikusema wakati nilisema kila mara. Inakuwaje Fyatu mzima anajigeuza au kugeuzwa mdudu?
Chanzo: Mwananchi Jtano leo.

No longer at ease Tanzania island of peace––––Part three

After exploring the genesis and the results of the just ended monkey on the back that left Tanzania with egg on its face, in this last instalment, we can report some new findings and propose what’d be done and how it’d be done. 

        Jokes aside, the Tanzania we used to know is long gone. It’s embroiled in a catastrophic embroglio. Its hyped-up cohesion, harmony, and unity are also long gone. Therefore, it needs practical and true rejigging and reconciliation from its intranational conflict. Will Tanzania crack the hard nut and save itself from itself? It’s hard to tell without the likes of Mandela and Nyerere.
How and where to start? 
Accurate answers:

         i) Tanzania must locate, isolate, and admit all flaws, which triggered the conflict. 

        ii) Nay, it can’t reconcile itself without accepting that it’s the root causes of the quandaries and quagmire. 

        iii) Tanzania should avoid looking for somebody else to blame. For example, plagued rulers have claimed that demonstrators were foreigners! How, who are they, if indeed, they’re, and why? 

    President Samia retorted that Tanzanians can’t do that! Really? 

        iv) Authorities need to be true to themselves and all Tanzanians. For, it’ll help to show genuineness and willingness. The island of peace will be resuscitated if rulers do and preach justice for everybody. 

        v) Tanzania should start to do and preach justice instead of clinging on its empty clangour and tarradiddle of peace without justice.
Practically, the authorities must earmark the parties to the conflict, release all detained opposition leaders, demonstrators, and pardon each other to build trust for reconciliation can start. Thereafter, the authorities must admit mistakes, then move together and move on. 
        Absolutely, there can’t be any reconciliation without the trio facing each other and telling the truth. The authorities must tell the whole truth and listen to other truths pertaining to the conflict at issue.
What are the root causes?
Demonstrators said clearly that they opposed (and still do) chronic abductions, corruption, despotism, forced disappearances, injustices, joblessness, murders, nepotism, partyism, the absence of the new constitution, and a truly Independent National Electoral Commission (INEC), which all stakeholders should equally and fully participate in its making. Such bottlenecks must be genuinely and practically addressed, and justice should be done and seen done. 
    Symptomatically, another problem revolves around the abuse of police forces and power and gross human rights violation as recently evidenced in the post-demo brutalities and bloodbaths. Thus, Tanzanians must persecute all the culprits regardless of their affiliations or positions as they immediately release those in custody. 

        Then, parties must be ready for a give-and-take process wherein mutual understanding must lead the process. Further, dented rulers must agree  to relinquish their positions to allow the creation of a transitional government to conducting new credible, fair, and transparent elections wherein all stakeholders must equally and fairly participate agree and decide on their informed modality.
Why fresh elections?
As per regional and international observers, which form the backbone of credible, fair, and transparent elections, there were no elections. They lacked important qualities such as credibility, fairness, peace, and transparency. For example, the Civic Front (CUF), one of at least credible opposition parties issued a scathing report demanding Tanzania to form a transition government that’ll conduct elections thereof since there wasn’t any election.             So, too, the SADC observers concluded and reported that Tanzania elections didn’t meet standards. For example, there are reports that there were many more police officers at certain voting stations than voters. 

        The African Union Election Observation Mission (AUEOM) report signed by Mokgweetsi E.K. Masisi, former Botswana President, concluded that “the 2025 Tanzania General Elections did not comply with AU principles, normative frameworks, and other international obligations and standards for democratic elections.” 

        The EU concluded that “the lack of level playing field in the run up to the elections was marked by reports of abductions and disappearances and violence limiting the civic and democratic space.” Of all observers, it was only the EAC, which ‘congratulated’ Tanzania on its elections. 

    Blimey, it’s easy to know why the ECA littered with autocrats of the sort did that. Many Tanzanians and the world at large wondered how’d a president that garnered close to 100% be sworn in hurriedly without any public participation if indeed she truly got that figure. 

        That said, the authorities are panting on how to save face. Due to that many famous artists are vigorously at work trying to dupe and calm youths to create and offer an opportunity for national reconciliation. Again, considering what’s ongoing wherein hundreds of demonstrators were recently charged with treason, Tanzania is likely to flounder and squander this golden opportunity.
Conclusion
Let’s agree. Tanzania is a horrible catch-22. To survive, the above recommendations, inter alia, must be worked on. Habits sometimes end up being faults. Demystify myths and move on Tanzania japo maji yameishamwagika. Fool me once, shame on me. Fool me twice, shame on you. The jury is still out though.

Source: Daily Monitor today, Sunday.

Epuka na Uogopa Uchoyo katika Ndoa

Leo tutaongelea uchoyo. Kwenye ndoa, sawa na kwenye maisha mengine, kuna wanandoa wachoyo. Hii ni tabia chafu na mbaya sana. Japo, kwa asili yake, binadamu ni mbinafsi, na wakati mwingine mchoyo, uchoyo si jambo jema na linapaswa kuepukwa kwa gharama yoyote. Ubinafsi na uchoyo ni tabia mbaya isipokuwa kwenye eneo moja tu au mawili. Katika tishio la kuondelewa uhai wake, binadamu ana haki ya kuwa mchoyo au kujihami (self-defence and preservation of life) kiasi cha kuondoa maisha ya yule anayetaka kuondoa wake. Hili, Kadhalika, katika kummilki mwenzi wake. Na eneo hili ni kwa mwenzi wake tu. Mfano, hakuna anayekubali mwenzi wake achukuliwe na mwenzake. Ndiyo maana, visa vingi vya wanandoa kufumaniana na kuuana au kuachana si vigeni machoni mwa walio wengi. Hapa ndipo utata wa mitala hujitokeza hata tukiukandamiza, kuutetea, kuutafutia sababu nuzuhu, na kuuhalisha. Kwa hulka ya binadamu, kila mmoja hupenda upekee fulani. Awe na nyumba yake pekee ikiwa na maana ya mke na mume na vitu kama hivi. Awe na gari lake. Afaidi mambo au vitu vyake bila kuchangia wala kubughudhiwa na wengine. 
            Binadamu anapaswa kuchunga hata kuepuka sana ubinafsi na uchoyo katika maisha na nyanja zote isipokuwa kwenye tishio la maisha na umilki wa mwenzi wake na mali zake. Tofauti, katika mali, binadamu anaweza kugawa, kuuza, kuhonga, kuazima, hata kuziharibu. Kwenye ndoa na uhai, hana chaguo isipokuwa kuwa mbinafsi na mchoyo. Kwa mfano, kwa wanandoa, ubinafsi tofauti na ulioonyeshwa hapo juu, unatosha kuiyumbisha hata kuihatarisha ndoa. Hakika, wanandoa hawapaswi kuwa na changu katika ndoa bali chetu. Hawapaswi kuwa na mimi bali sisi. Kwa wanaomkumbuka marehemu Malkia Elizabeth wa Uingereza, watakumubuka namna alivyokuwa ameolewa na mume Philip ambaye hakuwa mfalme kama yeye. Hata hivyo, tokana na dhana ya kuchangia na kumilki kila kitu pamoja kwa wanandoa, Malkia alimpandisha cheo mumewe asiyetoka kwenye ukoo wake wa kifalme na kuwa mwana wa mfalme.
            Kuna vitu ambavyo wanandoa wanaweza kudharau hata kutokumbuka. Kwa mfano, mmoja kati ya wanandoa kujaliwa kipato kuliko mwenzie. Kama ndoa yako imo kwenye hali hii, basi adui yako namba moja ni mafanikio unayoyaita yako badala ya yenu. Je huwa unasema pesa yetu, gari letu, nyumba yetu au mali zetu au zangu? Je uliishamuuliza mwenzio hujisikiaje unapoonyesha wazi kuwa kila mtu ana chake na siyo chenu kama wanandoa? Kujibu maswali hayo, vaa viatu vya mwenzio au jiweke kwenye nafasi yake. Jiulize ungejisikiaje kama mwenzi wako angeendekeza tabia ya changu badala ya chetu? 
            Kunapokuwa, na changu na si chetu, basi kuna hatari kubwa kwa wahusika. Tunapoongelea hatari, madhara, na ubaya wa ubinafsi na uchoyo ni hapa. Mali na vitu vyote vinaweza kumilkiwa pamoja na kusiwe na tatizo. Isitoshe, tunaweza kuvitumia kuwasaidia wengine wasio navyo lakini siyo ndoa. Japo ndoa umeikuta na kuifungia hapa duniani, ni tofauti na vitu vingine. Hii ni kwa sababu, hata ulipende lako vipi, huwezi kulala nalo wala kushindwa kuwapa lift wenzako kwa kutumia gari hilo hilo ulipendalo. Hata upende vipi mashamba na wanyama wako, huwezi kulala navyo wala kuvitumia peke yako. Unaweza kuvinunua na kuviuza hata kuviazima kwa wengine. Unaweza kuvigawa hata kuvirithisha. Unaweza kuajili mtu au watu wengine kuvihudumia. Je unaweza kuajiri mtu mwingine kuhudumia mwenza wako awe wa kike au kiume kindoa?
               Kwenye ndoa ya kweli, hakuna changu wala chako bali chetu. Hata hivyo, katika mfumo dume, tabia hii mara nyingi huwa nayo wanaume. Utamsikia mtu akisema, “nitakufukuza kwenye nyumba yangu” au “unafanya kiburi utafikiri wewe ndiye uliyejenga nyumba hii! Naweza kukuacha na kuingiza mwanamke mwingine.” Yapo mengi yanayosemwa kuhusiana na umilki wa mali. Kama nyumba yako au gari lako lilikuwa na thamani, kwanini hukuvioa? Kama una haki na jeuri hiyo, kwanini ulipoteza muda hata fedha zako kwenda kumtafuta, tena kwa kumbembeleza, huyo unayemtishia maisha kwa sababu ya vitu? Je hapa tatizo ni ukosefu wa kumbukumbu au ujinga wa kawaida na uroho?

Chanzo: Mwananchi Jpilli leo.

Ole wa ‘mafyatu’mamluki waliotufyatua

 

Kwanza, natuma rambirambi kwa mafyatu waliofyatuliwa bahati mbaya baada ya mafyatu wa ‘kigeni’ aka ‘mamluki’ kukinukisha na kutufyatua na kupotezea sifa ya kisiwa cha imani ya amani, mshikamano, mapendano, na upendo. Nasikia hawa mafyatu wa kigeni waliua mafyatu wetu wasiopenda mbambamba na kusingizia mageshi yetu hasa ndata wasioweza kuua hata mbu. Wakimkamata, wanamuamuru aruke apotelee mbali. 

        Yupo aliyedai eti kuna utekaji! Nani kawambia? Wanaotekwa, hutekwa na ‘wageni’ na siyo mafyatu wetu. Ndata na vyombo vyetu vya uhasama, sorry usalama, haviwezi kuruhusu hata auawe atekwe au kupotezwa inzi wetu. Hatuwezi kutekana zaidi ya kutakana na kuhitajiana wala hatuwezi kuchoma au kufyatua mali za mafyatu wenzetu au umma. Hatuchomi hata taka. ‘Wote’ waliouliwa walikuwa mamluki. ‘Hakuna haja’ kuwalilia wakati ‘walijitakia.’ Kadhalika, waliochoma na kuiba ni ‘wageni’ hao hao. Msitusingizie.
        Niwaonye tena kwa kinywa kipana na herufi kubwa. Komeni na kukomaa kabla hatujawakomesha, mkatokomea, na kukomea kuzimu. Msituzeee. Shauri yenu. Hatuchezi lijapo suala la amani ya imani. Yeyote anayepanga kukinukisha, atanuka yeye baada ya kumfyatua na kumzika hata kwenye makaburi yasiyojulikana. Ajue. Hata wale wasiojulikana wanaojulikana, sorry, wasioweza kujulikana, hawapendi uchochezi na uchokozi huu. Walaaniwe wote waliosababisha haya mambo.
        Kaya yetu ni ya amani. Msituletee chuki, migongano, na uzushi wenu. Nani kawaambia tuna shida? Najua. Mnatuonea wivu. Ndiyo maana mnatuzulia kila uongo dhidi. Kuna waliongopa eti uchafuzi, sorry, uchaguzi wetu haukuwa huru na wa haki. Kwanza, unawahusu nini? Ungekuwa hivyo, ‘walioshinda’ wangeshindaje kwa aslimia mia? 

   Wapo walioongopa eti kulikuwa na ndata wengi vituo vya kupiga kura. Ebo! Kuna kosa gani ndata wakitiki, tukaweka, na kuchukua? Kwani, wao si wana kaya? Hata wangechakachua, inawahusu nini nyinyi? Hamjui kuwa nao wana vyama vyao wanavyovipenda na si kosa kikatiba? Kuna kosa gani ndata kumtumikia na kumchagua amuri mujeshi wao? Si wanaonyesha upendo na mapendano ambayo ndiyo alama ya kaya yetu? Yenu mapondano na chuki.
        Nisisitize. Mafyatu wetu hawawezi kuandamana tokana na kujazwa, sorry, kujaa imani ya amani mbali na kutokuwa na miguu ya kuchezea kwenda kuandamana. Hata uwanyanyase vipi, hawawezi kufanya hivyo. Kabla ya maandamano, hamkusikia mkuu mazeri akisema maandamano yatakuwa ya kwenda kuweka, kutiki, na kuchukua kama ilivyotokea tokana naye kuwa na maono hadi kutabiri matokeo. Wapo wanaodai eti matokeo yalipikwa? Loo! Mlitaka yaokwe au kukaangwa? Wengine waliongopa eti tulizima intanet! Kwanza, hakuna aliyezima intanet bali ilijizima. 

        Pili, nani kawambia kuwa intaneti ni chakula au hewa? Wajue. Mafyatu si wapenzi wala watumiaji wa intanet tokana na uchochezi wake. Acha haya. Najua. Tunajua. Wanajua. Wanatuonea wivu.
         Wengine walihoji kwanini tuliapishana haraka tena kwenye uwanja wa mageshi? Ebo! Walitaka tuapishane baada ya mwaka tena mbele ya wahuni kama hawa mamluki? Kwani, kazi ya mageshi ni nini kama siyo kupokea amri na kulinda chochote tena bila kupoteza muda kuhoji au kuwaza?
        Wanaongopa eti kuna mafyatu wa kaya yetu waliuawa. Komeni. Sie siyo machizi, mahayawani, mataahira, wala makatili kuuana sisi kwa sisi. Sasa elewa na muamini kama alivyosema mazeri mwenyewe. Waliofyatuliwa wakafa ni mafyatu ya kigeni siyo wetu. Nani awezaye kumuua ndugu yake tena kwenye kaya ya amani?
        Hatuna sababu wala shida ya kuandamana au kukinukisha. Kwanza, hatunuki. Pili, tunajivunia na kudumisha amani mshikamano wetu. Tuna demokrasia ya kupigiwa m,fano na iliyotukuka hadi, kama unapendwa, unashinda kwa asilimia mia. Tuna mafyatu wasiowahi hata kuua inzi. Hatuna ufisadi, umaskini, wala ujinga wowote unaowafanya wale mafyatu viumbe waliozoea kuandamana hata akiwanyea kunguru. 

        Vijana wetu wote wana ‘ajira zinazolipa.’ Anayebisha aende kwenye miji yetu aone wanavyofaidi kuendesha pikipiki na kupiga njuluku kubwa. Tume wapa uhuru wa kutofuata sheria kwa kukatisha kwenye taa nyekundu hata kuuza bidhaa kwenye sehemu za wenda kwa miguu. Zaidi ya hapa, unataka nini? Uchumi wetu unakuwa kwa kasi ya ajabu. Sisi pekee ndiyo tuna ‘bilionea’ ukanda huu na tunaovutia wachukuaji, sorry wawekezaji kuliko kaya yoyote na tuanochaguana bila kujali viwango vya elimu wala ujuzi.
        Eleweni. Tutailinda amani na mshikamano hata kama itahitaji kumwaga damu ya hawa mafyatu wa kigeni. Kwanza, nani kawambia? Sie siyo mazwazwa tuuane sisi kwa sisi. Sisi sote ni ndugu. Hatuna uchama, udini, ukabila, ueneo, ujimbo, wala chuki baina yetu.
        By the way, kuna mafyatu waliwafyatua wasanii wetu kuwa ni wasanii na waongo, woga, na machangu! Kwani, kazi yao ni nini? Kuna mbwa walijiita simba. Kiliponukishwa kikanuka, wakarudia uumbwa wao. Uliona wapi murume akatoga masikio au kuvaa hereni na kuwa na uso kama mwananke akabaki kuwa mrume siyo buabua?  Nimesemaje?

Chanzo: Mwananchi Jtano leo.