Yo-ho, ho-ho, I just can’t understand. I just couldn’t get it. Even my poor and stupid dogs Tamba, Mwamba, Miki, Stan, Jerome, Ray and Gilo couldn’t get it. True, I just can’t understand why Prof. Ibra Lee Pumba aka Pumba wanted to attempt an impossible. Did he seriously mean it or just wanted to hit the headlines? Who knows? Maybe, he thought that his former party is his private party if not his experimental party. Sans doute, when Pumba resigned the chairmanship of the Civilised and United Fighters (CUF) boozers wrongly thought he meant it. So, too, they didn’t know that Pumba, too, didn’t know what he’s doing. They didn’t know that Pumba would end up lapping his own vomits up as it recently shamelessly came about.
In boozers’ parlance, Pumba’s committed a political suttee. So, too, he seems to try to resuscitate the dead. Is it possible really? Like his name in Swahili, Lee Pumba’s become chaff or pumba. I didn’t know that such a hyper academic would be myopic and desperate like this. Why didn’t Pumba foresee the fact that the Chama Cha Maulaji (CCM) would ruthlessly use, misuse, abuse and dump him thereafter as it did? I don’t know that the CUF has become so much useless and hopeless that it can retake Pumba; while he rocked the boat before abandoning the ship in hour of need. Shall Pumba not rescind his ill-advised decision, he truly will be aiming at a double suttee in which CUF and Pumba himself will pay the price so dearly that they’ll never recover. Who wants a traitor especially at this time or reckoning? Why doesn’t Pumba want to understand that he’s caught between a rock and a hard place? For, whatever move he makes needs much care?
Although in politics there’s neither a permanent friend nor foe, I’ll commit suicide shall the CUF return Pumba into the fold. I therefore can write his political dirge; and possibly, that of the CUF shall it commit the sacrilege of readmitting Pumba. Again, the CUF may–like Pumba–lick its vomits. What’s certain is: shall both parties become myopic and embark on fatal embrace, the duo will die together. What a kiss of death in such a fatal embrace! When all this buffoonery is going on, the CCM is laughing heartily waiting to throw down a huge party after such demise.
There are things that Pumba needed to underscore before divorcing his party. Firstly, his exit–apart from being misguided–was badly and wrongly timed.
Secondly, he needed to know how marketable he’s compared to Dr Will Silaha who stole thunder after divorcing his party.
Thirdly, he needed to know if his new buddies truly needed him or just wanted him in order to rape and violate him politically as it has happened within a short time.
Fourthly, Pumba needed to know who’s fooling whom in this game of deceit; especially if we consider the fact that his party would have given the CCM a heck of time in Zenj. As an economist, Pumba needed to do cost analysis before embarking on this lossmaking and shame-causing project. Boozers are good at this. Before asking for a loan from mama muuza, you throw some jokes and praises to see how she’d react before throwing your nets. It seems; Pumba didn’t do this.
Sixth, Pumba needed to think about the repercussions of his move; and how the members of his party, fans and the general majority of boozers would construe his move. Was his move productive or counterproductive? Was there any room for retreating or was it a cul de sac which I’m sure it is? What was his exit strategy suppose he steps into a trap?
Seventh, was Pumba’s strategy reliable and viable or just a mere suttee? A person with PhD even in kanywaji would underscore such important things before making any move. In such circumstances, you don’t just act like a fish that swallows the bait without knowing how to vomit it. You can’t just chew without knowing if you’ve what it takes to swallow what you’ve chewed.
Pumba’s goof reminds boozers of other political outcasts such as Dr Masimbuko Lamuai, Dr Ua la Waridi Kaboro, Jummy Mwapachu and many more who gambled with their ulaji in the party to end up becoming politically carbuncled. I only know one political carpetbagger, Steve Wahasira, who returned to his party and succeeded. The rest are but political bric-a-bracs so to speak.
Now that Pumba has his dirty linens on the agora, the CUF can put a spin on it; and admit him. Again, the dent that this move’ll cause is tremendous. The only way to help Pumba out of this impasse-cum-imbroglio is tell him to accept to hit the road and return to his village. There, he’ll get sympathy and what to do next. It makes no sense for Pumba to go on with self-dressing down.
Bye Pumba
Go Pumba go
Never look back
Go it is the time to pack
Go Pumba!
Source: Guardian Sunday.
No comments:
Post a Comment