Tufunge Aprili kwa kuwaletea matanuzi ya mtoto wa imla wa nchi maskini

Mtoto wa dikteta wa Equatorial Guinea Teodorin Obiang Nguema akitanua jijini Paris bila kujali kuwa kuna wananchi wanaoishi chini ya dola kwa siku kwa nchi yenye kuzalisha mafuta kwa wingi ikiwa na idadi ndogo ya watu lakini maskini.

Diwani anapomshauri rais kuacha kuvuta bangi

Samwel Aboko Onkwani diwani wa Kiogoro nchini Kenya ametoa mpya baada ya kuwashauri watu wa karibu ya rais Uhuru Kenyatta aache kuvuta bangi. Onkwani amefunguliwa mashitaka kwa kudhalilisha mamlaka na yuko nje kwa dhamana ya shilingi za Kenya 50,000.
Onkwani anadaiwa kutoa maneno hayo kwenye mkutano wa hadhara aliufanya Agosti  28, mwaka jana. Kwa habari zaidi BONYEZA HAPA.

Kijiwe kuliambia bunge si kuliombea

          Baada ya kijiwe kusikia baadhi ya wababaishaji, wataka sifa na wachovu eti kuombea bunge la Katiba lililoharibikiwa, kimeamua kukaa na kuwakemea wote waombaji na waombewa.

Mgosi Machungi anaingia na salamu zenyewe, “Wagoshi mmesikia huu ubabaishaji wa wasaka tonge wanaosema eti wamikwenda Dodoma kuombea Bunge la Katiba la ulaji wa dezo? Tate nane. Huyu sasa roho mtakakitu si mtakatifu tena!”

 “Mgosi  usinichekeshe. Eti kulifanya nini Bunge la Mipasho na mitusi?” Anachomekea  Mipawa.

“Kuiombea iache mitusi na mipasho,” Anajibu Mgosi huku akibusu kombe lake la kawaha.

Kapende aliyekuwa anatoka kuongea na bi mkubwa wake ambaye inaonekana wana ugogoro, anakwanyua mic, “Msiwashangae hawa. Kaya imezoea kuombaomba kila kitu.   Huu ndiyo uvivu wa kufikiri.Wanadhani na Subhanna ni kigeugeu kama wafadhili wao wanaowatumia kila wakati? Usishangae  maombi yakageuka sera ya vijidhahabi vya kuchongwa vinavyotafuta ulaji na umaarufu.”

“Nadhani wanaokwenda kuliombea Bunge badala ya kuliambia ukweli mchungu wanapaswa kuambiwa kuwa wao ni sehemu ya tatizo. Kama kuomba ni big deal, hawa waombeaji wa wenzao wanapaswa kuombewa, kama alivyosema mchungaji Msigua, ni wazinzi na si uchumi wa kaya wala wanasiasa. This is outrageously downright nonsensical move to gain some mileage if not money. Hii ni sawa na kuombea uchumi wakati unalala kitanda kimoja na mafisadi na mafisi.” Anangurumu Msomi Mkatatamaa.

Mijjinga aliyekuwa akionyesha wazi alivyo na usongo wa kumwaga pwenti anazoa mic, “Nadhani wanakwenda kuwatoa upepo wasaka ngawira wanaozidi kuchuma njuluku zetu kwa kupiga kelele na mipasho.  Wameona ulaji wakatafuta mbinu ya kuhomola. Bongo hii jameni! Mbona dini nyingi ni biashara. Huoni wachungaji mabilionea kama Rwakatarehe Ka-tortoise na matapeli wengine? Huvuna wasipopanda na kupanda wasipovuna. Hamkumsikia mwenzao Mtetemekea wezi mjengoni?”

Sofia Lion Kanungaembe anatia timu, “Kuomba muhimu vinginevyo muwe wapagani tu. Kuna kosa gani kuliombea Bunge?”

Kanji kama kawa anatia timu kumpa tafu mshirika wake. Anasema, “Sofi ambia yeye. Kama Bunge natukanana Mungu pasa ambia aache tukana tusi kubwa kubwa. Veve ona mtu fyatua tusi kubakuba nyamaza?”

“Tuache utani. Muhimu ni kuwapasha hawa waishiwa kuwa wamezidisha ujinga badala ya kuwaombea. Hivi kuwambia watu waache mipasho na mitusi nako kwahitaji dua jamani?” Mipawa anahoji.

Mpemba aliyeingia akiwa amechelewa anakwanyua mic, “Yakhe mie kama wataka ombewa basi tuombe ushuke moto uwachome wale wote waniotutishia vita ya kimbari, waongo, watukanaji matusi ya maungoni na wanaokula njuluku zetu kwa kufanya kazi ya kutukana ati. Mijitu mizima yageuza midomo makalio ya kutolea ushuzi ashakum tena hadharani bila aibu.”

“Ami umeua. Hakuna nilipoachwa hoi kama kusikia yule bi Hawa wana Ghasia akimwambia jaji Joseph Waryuba kufunga mdomo wake asiangalie domo lake mwenyewe.” Mbwa Mwitu anaamua kula mic. Anakunywa kahawa yake na kuendelea, “Mie nadhani wangepelekwa pale madaktari wa magonjwa ya akili na Takokuru kukamata walioingia mle kifisadi na wale wanaovuta mibangi kama alivyowahi kusema Jobless Nduguy kiongozi wao.”

Msomi aliyekuwa akisoma jarida la Mail on Wednesday anaamua kurejea kumwaga mipwenti. Anakohoa kidogo na kunywa kahawa yake na kusema, “Mbwa Mwitu nakupongeza sana kwa kuwa serious na kutoa pwenti makini. Hakuna ubishi kuwa mambo yanayoendelea pale, licha ya kuzamisha njuluku zetu, yana uendawazimu fulani hata kama yanatendwa na wale wanaoitwa waheshimiwa wanaofanya mambo yasiyostahiki heshima.  Ni bangi hii kushindwa kujua kuwa wachovu wanataka katiba na si matusi wala mipasho. Ni upungufu wa akili kusema eti maoni ya wananchi yadharauliwe kwa kisingizio cha kusema eti Waryuba aliandika mambo yake. Upuuzi mtupu. Kwani alijiteua au ni ujinga unaosumbua watu tena wazima wenye mavyeo makubwa tu?”

Anakohoa na kuendelea, “Wanaokwenda kuombea Bunge hawana lolote zaidi ya njaa na kutafuta connections. Walikuwa wapi wakati mambo yakiharibika?  Kaya haiwezi kuendeshwa kwa maombi. Bunge linapaswa kuambiwa kuwa wachovu wamechoka na usanii na usaka tonge ukiachia mbali mipasho, mitusi na kuvuana nguo. Hakuna wanachonikera hawa wanaojifanya watu wa God kama kutufanya hatunazo. Wanadhani tumesahau kuwa wao ndio waliingiza ukoloni hata utumwa barani mwetu? We need to tell them to go to hell.”

Mijjinga hangoji Msomi amalizie. Anakula mic, “Msomi usemayo ni kweli tupu. Mijitu mipumbavu inakwenda kwenye mahekalu yao na kuhubiri siasa za maangamizi wanaiangalia na kungoja iondoke badala ya kuishushia bakora. Halafu wanakuja na usanii eti wa kuliombea Bunge. Mara ngapi wameomba na hakuna lililotokea. Jibu si maombi bali kuchenchiana. We waache wafanye upuuzi tutawaumbua watakapomaliza hayo maigizo yao ya kusakia ulaji.”

Sofia haridhiki na mawazo haya. Anakwanyua mic, “Mie nasema kuomba lazima mtake mistake halo halo! Tena muache kutukana watu kuwa ni wapumbavu eti kwa kusemea mahekaluni. Kwani kazi ya mahekalu ni nini kama si kuwasiliana na umma?”

“Dada yangu Sofia umeingiliwa na nini? Yaani hata kama ni unazi sikutegemea kama ungeunga mkono huu upuuzi wa kuchanganya dini na siasa dada’angu.” Anasema Mchunguliaji.

“Hata mie namshangaa dada yetu sijui nini kimempata maana huko nyuma hakuwa hivyo.” Anachomekea  Mbwa Mwitu.

“Kanji mbona unatoa macho bila kumuunga mkono mshirika wako Sofi?” Anachokoza Kapende.

“Pende acha mimi. Hapana unga kono kila kitu ya Sofi hata kama napenda yeye.” Kanji anajitetea.

Kabla ya kuendelea, Mbwa Mwitu anachomekea, “Eti unapenda yeye sana? Kama veve penda yeye peleka jamatini.”

“Swahili hairuhusiwi ingia jamatin vinginevyo iwe fagiaji au ongozi au vipi Kanji?” Anachomekea  Mzee Kidevu.

“Kama mimi penda Sofi wewe husu nini? Halo halo! Mbwa hapana changanya siasa na dini hapa. Iko penda hata veve.” Kanji anaamua kuja juu.

Mgosi Machungi anaamua kukatua mic, “Mgosi Kanji emu muombee msamaha mwenzio. Eti unampenda ii umfanyi nini?”

Kabla ya kuendelea Mchunguliaji anadakia, “Amkameruni.”

Kitendo cha Mchunguliaji kusema eti Kanji amkameruni Mbwa Mwitu kimezusha mtafaruko hadi watu kutaka kushikana mikono. Kuona hivyo, kila mmoja anajikata kivyake kuepuka ndata kuja kutubambikizia kesi.

Chanzo:  Tanzania Daima Aprili 30, 2014.

I like this angle

Sauti ya ukombozi iliyozimika Kameruni

Kwa wanaliofuatilia muziki uliowasumbua watawala majambazi wa Afrika watakuwa wanamfahamu nguli Lapiro de Mbanga, mwanamuziki aliyefungwa sana kutokana na vibao vyake vinavyousuta usultani wa kiafrika ambapo ofisi ya rais hugeuka mali ya familia. Kwa wanaojua kifaransa kibao hiki ni ushahidi wa Mbanga alivyopinga utawala wa kijambazi wa Yes Papa au Ndiyo Mzee. Mwaka 2008n aliingia matatani baada ya kufyatua kibao kiitwacho Constitution constipée” (“Constipated Constitution”)kilichomkosoa imla wa Kameruni Paul Biya. Huyu jamaa unaweza kumlinganisha na Bob Marley ingawa hawakuwa na umaarufu sawa. Hoja zao hazikutofautiana sana kuhusiana na ukombozi hasa wa Fikra. Mungu amlaze mahali pema peponi Lambo Sandjo Pierre Roger (April 7, 1957 – March 16, 2014), aka Lapiro de Mbanga.

Nyalandu anamdanganya nani?

           

Hakuna kitu kimetuacha hoi kama kauli iliyotolewa na waziri wa Maliasili na Utalii Lazaro Nyalandu mkoani Mara, alipokuwa akizungumza na waandishi wa habari mara baada ya kuhutubia mahafali ya 10 ya Chuo cha Musoma Utalii.  Nyalandu alikaririwa akisema, “Mimi niseme tu kwa sasa mipango niliyoweka kwa kushirikiana na watendaji wangu, polisi, jeshi la JWTZ na wadau wengine ni kuhakikisha wahusika wote wananaswa na kutajwa majina bila ya hofu wala kuoneana haya, hata kama ni kigogo wa serikali nitamtaja jina.”

Kwa kauli ya Nyalandu kuna ukweli kuwa kuna vigogo wa serikali katika kadhia ya ujangili kama lilivyowahi kudai gazeti la Uingereza la The Mail on Sunday. Ni bahati mbaya kuwa watuhumiwa waliamua kufunika kombe ili mwanaharamu apite. Je Nyalandu alimaanisha nini anaposema “hata kama kuna kigogo wa serikali”?

Nyalandu aliongeza,“Niseme tu hawa wanaofanya biashara ya mkaa, kuvuna magogo na kukata miti hovyo na hata wale wafugaji wanaoingiza mifugo yao kwenye hifadhi na wao pia nawaona kama majangili tu, adhabu yao ni sawa na majangili wa meno ya tembo.” Hapa ndipo ubabaishaji wa Nyalandu unaweza kuuona wazi wazi. Je sheria inasemaje kuhusiana na tafsiri ya neno jangili?  Hivi kweli wachoma mkaa waliosikinishwa na sera mbovu wanapaswa kuitwa majangili? Je kuwakamata ndiyo jibu wakati wakiendelea kufukarishwa huku mikataba mingi ya nishati ikiwa ya kiwizi kama ilivyobainika kwenye kashfa za Richmond, IPTL na nyingine nyingi zihusianazo na nishati? Hapa ni kama Nyalandu anataka kukwepa wajibu wake na kuwatwisha mzigo watu maskini wanaotafuta riziki zao baada ya kuwa mashuhuda wa maliasili na utajiri wao ukiwanufaisha wageni. Kesho watakamatwa wachoma mkaa na kutangaza kuwa amewakamata vigogo wa ujangili.

          Tumkumbushe Nyalandu kuwa si wa kwanza kuja na viapo kama hivi. Alianza waziri wa Usafirishaji Dk Harrison Mwakyembe alipodai kuwa atawashughulikia wauza unga. Tangu atoe tishio hili, Mwakyembe hajawahi kukamata hata mmoja. Sana sana siku hizi amenywea kuonyesha kuwa ameshindwa na alijipayukia. Kama Mwakyembe, Heri Nyalandu angejinyamazia. Kama bosi wake yaani rais Jakaya Kikwete amenywea, yeye ni nani? Kama Kikwete ameweza kuwateua hata baadhi ya watuhumiwa wa kusafirisha nyara za taifa kama katibu mkuu wa Chama Cha Mapinduzi (CCM) Abdulrahaman Kinana, Nyalandu ni nani awakamate wateule hawa? Kama serikali yake imeshikwa na kigugumizi kueleza ni kwanini wale wapakistani waliotorosha wanyama hai waliruhusiwa kutoroka, leo Nyalandu ana jipya gani zaidi ya kuwa sanaa na ngonjera za kuwalewesha wananchi. Kamata na kuonyesha hao majangili ndipo utangaze badala ya kuapa. Maneno matupu hayavunji mfupa. Watu wanataka matendo na si viapo na matishio. Maana mwenye kukamata au kutaja huwa hatangazi zaidi ya kutenda na kuuonyesha umma. Anachofanya Nyalandu nadhani ni kuwastua wahusika kuwa kuna kitu kibaya kinaweza kuwakuta hivyo wasimamishe shughuli zao haramu au kubadili mbinu.

          Ni bahati mbaya kuwa watawala wetu wenye maneno na ahadi nyingi wameligeuza taifa letu kuwa shamba la bibi hata la chizi. Hata hao majangili wanaokamiwa na Nyalandu wanajua hili fika. Hawataacha kutenda jinai yao ambayo inawaingizia mabilioni ya fedha.

          Kimsingi, tatizo la ujangili ni suala la kimfumo ambapo Tanzania inaruhusu mtu kutajirika bila kutoa maelezo ya ni namna gani amepata utajiri husika.  Wezi na majangili na wahalifu wengine watashindwa nini kuendelea kutengeneza fedha iwapo hata viongozi wetu wamekataa na kushindwa kutaja mali zao. Je wanaogopa nini kama utajiri wao hautokani na jinai hizi wanazodai watapambana nazo?

Turejee yaliyoandikwa na The Mail on Sunday na serikali ikakaa kimya. Gazeti liliandika, “Utawala wa Rais Kikwete umetawaliwa na mauaji ya tembo yaliyovunja rekodi katika historia ya nchi yake. Kibaya zaidi, wahifadhi wanasisitiza kuwa, ndani ya Serikali kuna viongozi wanaoshiriki biashara hiyo.” Kama madai haya yangekuwa ya kizushi bila shaka serikali ya Kikwete ingekwenda mahakamani ili kujisafisha na kutoa somo juu ya nini ni ukweli au uongo wa madai haya.     

Je ni kwanini serikali iliamua kunyamaza kama hakuna ukweli? Gazeti liliendelea, “Miongoni mwao ni  matajiri wakubwa nchini, wafadhili na wanachama wa CCM na ndugu wa karibu wa Rais Kikwete. Lakini wanao marafiki wakubwa, huku majaji, waendesha mashtaka na polisi hurubuniwa kwa urahisi.”

Je hawa ndiyo vigogo wa serikali anaosema Nyalandu? Je anao ubavu wa kuwataja achia mbali kuwakamata? Kinachofurahisha ni ukweli kuwa Nyalandu hata Kikwete wanawafahamu hawa majangili papa kama walivyowahi kudai kuwa kuna mitandao yenye majangili kati ya 40 na 320. Sasa kama mnawafahamu na hamtaki kuwakamata, mnatupotezea muda wa nini kuapia kuwa mtawashughulikia?

Kuonyesha kuwa kuna ukweli unaofichwa, ni Nyalandu huyu huyu na wizara yake waliomgharimia mwandishi wa The Mail on Sunday Martin Fletcher kuja kuwasafisha. Hata hivyo, Fletcher aliendelea kuwavua nguo hadi wakachanganyikiwa na kunywea. Fletcher alikuja na kulipiwa malazi na kila kitu kwenye hoteli ya kitalii ya Serena. Je kama si kutaka kumziba mdomo mwandishi, ingawa hawakufanikiwa, walikuwa wanamlipia kama nani? Kimsingi, Fletcher alipaswa kuwa mgomvi wao ambaye walipaswa kukutana naye mahakamani na si kwenye hoteli ya kitalii huku wakiteketeza fedha ya umma. Je Nyalandu na wizara yake walikuwa wanamlipia Fletcher kwa kazi gani? Haiingii akilini hata kidogo.

Tumalizie kwa kumshauri Nyalandu akamate ndipo atangaze badala ya kutangaza kabla ya kukamata hao majangili wake anaowajua hata kwa idadi kuepuka kuchukulliwa ni kama sanaa  tu. Vinginevyo kinachoendelea hakina tofauti na tambo za Kikwete aliyesema ana orodha ya majina ya wauza unga lakini asiwakamate. Hana tofauti na Mwakyembe aliyejivua nguo na akaendelea kujitoa kimasomaso kwa kunywea baada ya kuonyesha wazi alivyoshindwa na wauza unga sawa na bosi wake. Je Nyalandu anataka kumdanganya nani wakati kila kitu kiko wazi kuwa hana ubavu wala nia ya kuwakamata majangili papa anaowajua kwa sura na majina?

Chanzo: Dira Aprili 2014.

Fanya niwambiavyo na si nifanyavyo mimi

Kwa watu wanaojua jinsi rais Jakaya Kikwete asivyopenda kujisomea, wanashangaa anapopata uchungu na elimu. Japo hii inaweza kuonekana kama kumponda Kikwete, kwa wanaojua alivyoweza kuwakingia kifua mawaziri wake waliotuhumiwa kughushi elimu wanashangaa uchungu wa Kikwete kwa elimu. Kwa waliosahau ni kwamba Kikwete amewakingia kifua  mawaziri Makongoro Mahanga, Mary Nagu na Wiliam Lukuvi na mawaziri wa zamani Emanuel Nchimbi, Deodorous Kamala aliyemteua balozi Ubelgiji. Je mtu wa namna hii anaweza kuwa na uchungu na elimu? Je hii gea ya kutoa vitabu jeshini inalenga kuonyesha nini? Je Kikwete anajiweka karibu na jeshi ili vitisho vyake na Lukuvi vionekane kuwa kweli? Ama kweli alichofanya Kikwete ni sawa na kile cha wahubiri uchwara na wanafiki katika Biblia ambao Yesu aliwakaripia waliokuwa wakiwahubiri watu kusikiliza wawahubiriyo bila kuangalia watendavyo.

War on drugs: when President just wonder!

          When President Jake Kiquette embarked on the art of grumping and passing the buck, boozers took a different one. While Kiquette seemed a bit apologetic as far as fight against drugs is concerned, boozers called a spade a spade.

Kiquette’s quoted as saying, “I wonder how drugs go through our airports unnoticed only to be seized outside the country. What is it that lacks at our airports? I am not happy with this situation and how the ministry and the airport authority are handling this issue.” Is there anything to wonder about for a person with the list of all drug barons in the hunk really? What does this wondering mean if at all the power that be was given the list of the names of drug kings and it decided to offer them a holiday? If presider wonders, what of a common earthlings whose children are harmed by this stuff? If a guy with all legal mighty, intelligence and security machinery is languishing on complaining, what of the victims?

Kiquette left us in stitches and shock when he said, “Just give me their names. Whether they are police officers, Tanzania Revenue Authority employees or any other official, I will fire them immediately. I've power to do so and no one can question my decision. They tarnish the image of all of us.” Firing not bringing to books uh? If he failed to act on the old names he’s turned into paraphernalia in his office, how’ll he act on the new ones? Is this lala salama from Mr. Colossus or politics as usual? When I loudly read the above quote at our swallowing joint one boozer just went off sarcastically saying, “Go tell it to the birds. Why asking for new names while you've nary dealt with the old ones you said you’d?” He added saying, “I concur with the wino. It is true that they all are beneficiaries of this stuff.”

Another one chipped in saying, “Look at our man. What’s wide of the mark with him in the first place? If he’s the power that I know he’s save that he lacks will power, what’s he been waiting for? Why's he complaining as if he’s powerless? Stop sitting on power. Use it and stop lamenting like a baby.” The guy added. The other one chipped in saying that whopper’s waiting for donor to help.

Though I know many drug barons, I’m not ready to divulge their names to the power I know will leak my name and end up facing the same fate as Amina Chifupa faced when she tried to name names.  Again, who’s fooling who in this game of deceit aka politics? I’m asking this question because I know that even birds know drug barons in the hunk. If Mr. Power’s afraid, who am I? Washughulikie acha rongo rongo.

We must agree that those supposed to fight drugs have pointlessly decided to go in bed with it for reasons they know. We must agree that if we decide to fight drugs practically but not politically and theoretically as it is now, we can. We must agree that our airports are now good conduits of drugs whereby those manning them mint and print dosh.  Indeed, we must agree that we know everything save that we pretend not to. If you doubt my assertion just remind yourself of the wealth those manning our airports have acquired within a short time they've been employed.

In case you still pretend that you don’t know who drug kingpins are I’ll remind you by giving you stark truth you don’t want to hear. Ask yourself those paupers you used to know who are now swimming in wealth. Thereafter, ask yourself: where and how did they make this shotgun wealth if it isn't by means of crimes? We all know these putas save that our authorities let us down. These guys are all over the place doing their things without any fear. In case you don’t remember them, go to all mansions that are mushrooming in our cities and towns. You’ll see tinted vehicles coming and going and nobody is alert.

 As for Mr. Stonker, let me jog his mind a little bit. Man, if you seriously and sincerely mean, biz please go back to the code of ethics. More important, please declare your wealth as the law requires you to do. I’m wondering. For nine years the guy’s been in power, refused to declare his wealth. Why? When’ll he do so? Can such a person seriously and practically take on drug barons really?  My foot!

Our hunk’s now famous all over the world though for wrong reasons. We’re even more famous than Afghanistan, Pakistan, Columbia and other hunks that produce hashish.  Given that we’re satisfied with charades and monkey biz that have been going on, chances are we’re going to be referred to as Drugland just soon. Who cares if a cabal of connected criminals can mint and print dosh even by sacrificing the lives of our innocent youths?

In sum, wait. I’m now convinced that we’re going to combat drug just soon. Hear what Mr. Biggie had to say in order to believe in what I’m saying, “This business has tarnished the image of this country, and due to its persistence, people all over the world now believe that all of us are involved in this biz. I’m very sad about this.”  Be warned. If this is the way we can take on drugs, rest assured. It’ll be biz as usual. And in the end, we all, just like our man, will end up wondering why drugs go through our airports so as to become a hellhole swallowing the lives of our youths.

Source: ThisDay April 28, 2014.

Lukuvi, do you want to stage a coup?

A one-of-a-kind Constituent Assembly member, Bill Lukuvi deserved a trophy as far as self-dressing down is concerned. Bill who is alleged to have forged his academic credentials helped his detractors to pin him down as far as building is concerned.

Bill’s recently quoted saying that if the CA passes three-tier govt Bongo will be ruled by the crowd. Are you serious Mr Lukuvi? Are you intending to stage a coup? Wow! I don’t understand if Jake Kiquette’ll spare you this time around. If he does, surely, he’ll be proving that his govt's but a joint venture aka ya ubia. Nonetheless, Bill’s lucky. Had he jabbered his gobbledygook during Mzee Mchonga’s time, he’d have learned what deprived birds of urine.

Bill’s quoted as saying, “I like two-tier govt for we are used to pray peacefully under trees. If we have three-tier govt we will pray under the barrels of gun.” My foot! This is incitement to the army to either take over or intimidate people. However cheap as these threats are, should not be ignored. The guy must have a lot of explaining about where the army he wants to use to topple the govt and when. Had I been president, Bill won’t have even been invited to the court be it Nkwazi Court or the court of law. Instead, he’d have been dragged to the purgatory if not to the guillotine. How dare you Bill to say that the govt's going to be overthrown and remain in the same govt? Did you sip before uttering such sacrilegious stuff?

There is a number of concerns vis a vis Lukuviii’s refuse. Firstly, he dispatched his terrorisation from the house of God. This means he broke the rule of not fraternizing religion and politics. Had his barf been given off by an opposition leader, it’d have amounted to treason. Our ever-and-over-abused cops would've been at work to apprehend him and charge. Where are cops renowned for rounding up people for opposing the establishment? Guys, stop applying law selectively and preferentially.

Secondly, Bill nattered what amounts to treason. How dare he say that the army will take over shall two-tier govt be bogged down? Has he already prepared his army to take over?  I hope our army will reprimand Bill and recant this puerile allegations however senseless and nonsensical they're.

Thirdly, Bill lied pointlessly saying that if CA consents to three-tier govt our country will face Rwanda-like genocide. Does he know the meaning of genocide? I urge him to go back to school. So too, he must make an apology to Bongoalalanders he’s belittled pointlessly. Even Rwanda will abhor such cheap and bankrupt politics using her pangs and pings to gain mileage. Again, does this prove allegations that the man forged his credentials? For, no educated person can liken what transpired in Rwanda with sane and mature move by Tanzanians to have a new constitution.

Fourth, Bill’s poisonous utterance warranties us to tell him that we’re neither zombies nor vihiyo he can easily take for a ride and get away with it. Acha uvivu wa kufikiri Bill.

Fifthly, to show how allegations that Bill forged his degrees and other academic privileges, he equated Korean crisis to his daydreamed chaos Bongolalaland should braced for according to his nightmares. How can one compare what transpired in Korean peninsula with our noble move in democracy? The two Korea Bill's talking about were separated by imperialists during the cold war. Bill need to be told that the cold war ended in 1990's after Berlin wall fell. Anyway, Bill, forgive me. I'm talking about academic hard stuff that’s the venue of elites who got their degrees after toiling for them but not forging them.

Sixth, Lukuvi needs to be told that what he is attempting to do is not new. Such ballyhoos were tried in 1990s when multiparty 's introduced. Some bankrupt politicos like him came with threats that if we allow multiparty politics our hunk would sink into chaos. The late Mwl JK Nyerere got wind of this hokum. He, thus, decided to reign and weigh in. He told all those chickens that multiparty’s inevitable. Hither we’re over twenty years down the line and no fracases has nary taken place save for those caused by CcM after finding that it can’t win elections legally.

Let’s wind up averring that all those wrongly thinking that three-tier govt will lead to anarchy and chaos need to have their heads examined. As for Bill, I strongly urge him to recant his poisonous stuff as he prepares himself either to go to school or prove that he didn't forge his academic credentials. As for Jake Kiquette, please fire this guy who doesn't know even how to use common sense. Lukuvi, do you want to stage a coup?

Source: Guardian April 27, 2014.

Kigeugeu cha mbayuwayu

 Siongezi neno uamue mwenyewe. Anayemtukana Warioba eti anamtunuku! Makubwa haya! Sanaa kweli kweli!

Walimsaliti yeye na mumewe eti leo wanamkumbuka! Wanamtunuku, kumtumia au kumtukana mama huyu?

Are these actors serious at all?

Kwa wanaojua jinsi Jakaya Kikwete anavyomchukia Nyerere na jinsi alivyomuangusha wanashangaa kuona haya mapenzi ya ghafla bi vu. Wawili hawa walivyoshika picha za waasisi wa muungano utadhani wanawapenda zaidi ya kupenda ulaji na ajenda zao. Tangu lini Kikwete aliyekataliwa ulaji na mwalimu akampenda zaidi ya kumponda? Wameishiwa hadi wanatumia wafu pale waliposhindwa kujitetea. Ni aibu na unafiki kiasi gani? Kama kuna watu wanawadhalilisha waasisi wa taifa letu si wengine bali Kikwete na genge lake walioendekeza ufisadi, ujangili, ubabaishaji, urongo, usanii na kila aina ya utapeli. Tumieni akili zenu badala ya kuwageuza waasisi hirizi kulinda uchafu wenu. Ama kweli wahenga walisema kuwa PAKA AKIONDOKA PAKA HUJITAWALA!
Si haba Panya aweza kuguguna ngozi ya Simba kwa vile wafu huwa hawasemi wala kujitetea.
 Matembezi ya unazi na ububusa yanapoitwa matembezi ya uzalendo.Ni matembezi ya uzalendo au matembezi ya uzandiki? Mbona hatuoni matembezi kama haya ya kupinga ubabaishaji, ujangili na ufisadi na machafu mengine yaliyotamalaki huku serikali ikiangalia na maafisa wake kuyashiriki?

Luku plus vi usitutishie nyau

Japo  wasomaji na wapenzi wa safu hii huwa wanauliza kama kweli navuta mibangi na kunywa migongo, huwa sijibu.
Hata hivyo, kazi zangu zinaweza kunitetea. Kama vipande vyangu huisaidia jamii kuondokana na watu hasa wala watu waitwao ‘human eaters aka watwawala’ kwa lugha ya kitaalamu, basi mibangi yangu ni mali au siyo?
Hivi karibuni kuna kihiyo mmoja anayetuhumiwa kughushi vyeti na sifa za kisomi hadi kujinadi kuwa ana ‘Masters’ wakati ni mwalimu wa zamani wa UPE aliyeibuliwa na siasa uchwara za kulindana na kufadhiliana.
Kihiyo huyu sitamtaja jina. Ila jina lake linafanana na Bill  mita ya LUKU ongeza VI alijifanya ni mpenzi na mzalendo wa kaya wakati si chochote si lolote bali mhalifu anayepaswa kupelekwa The Hague kwa kuchochea fujo.
 Bwana Luku plus vi si alikwenda kwenye ‘house of God’ na kufanya vitu ambavyo siyo saizi ya pale. ‘We can’t allow the house of God to go to dogs’. Eti alidai kuwa kama wachovu wataridhia kuwa na siri kali tatu basi wageshi watachukua kaya. Hivyo, walevi watatawaliwa kwa mtutu wa bunduki. ‘Shame on you Luku plus vi! How dare you to say that?’
 Hata hivyo, mshukuru Mungu kwa vile Njaa Kaya amekuwa akikukingia kifua kwa sababu ajuazo pamoja na kuambiwa kuwa ulighushi na ni kihiyo. Sijui kama kipindi hiki ataendelea kukudekeza wakati ukisema wazi kuwa anaweza kupinduliwa vinginevyo kuwe kuna tatizo ‘upstairs’.
Kwanza, licha ya kuwa aibu na kuvunja sheria, ni ukosefu wa heshima na hekima kwenda kwenye ‘house of God’ na kufanya siasa tena siasa zenyewe uchwara zenye kujaa mawazo mgando na utapiamlo vya hali ya juu. Pili, ni kukataa kukua na kukomaa kwa mtu kuwa na fikra za ki-Interahamwe, wale wahalifu waliotekeleza ‘genocide’ kule Ruanda.
Tatu, Luku plus vi alionyesha alivyo kihiyo kweli pale alipovuta mibangi yake ya kimadaraka na kulinganisha hali ya kisiasa kayani na ile ya Korea Kaskazini na Kusini. ‘How dare you compare a sheep to a hyena?’
Maskini kihiyo huyu hajui kuwa Korea iligawanywa tokana na siasa za kihasama za wakati wa vita baridi. Kwanini usijiandikishe Chuo Kikuu Huria lau ukapata msasa na kujua ‘basic things like these man?’
Najitolea kukufundisha bure lau uondokane na ukihiyo na aibu unavyozidi kuvionea sifa.
Kama wewe ni mwoga tokana na mazabe na madhambi mliyotutenda na wenzako kwenye genge lako, basi usitake kutujaza woga.
Yakupaswa uelewe. Mtu mzima hatishiwi nyau. Isitoshe, vijana wa sasa wa ‘ki-dot com’ si wa kutishia nyau wakati mmewanyonya hadi wakapigika. Wanajihangaisha kupata elimu ili wasiwe vihiyo kama wewe.
Lakini bado mnawanyima au kuwalangua mikopo ya elimu ya juu wakati wengi wenu mmesoma ubwete chini ya sera kombozi za mzee Mchonga. Ukome na kukomaa japo unaonyesha kukataa kukoma.
Nashangaa bangi wanazovuta madingi wetu ambao wanalindana hata kwenye upuuzi.
Laiti wengi wao wangekuwa wamesoma falsafa kama mimi, wangejua hatari ya kile wanachotengeneza huku wakiwatishia watu kwa mauaji ya kimbari yaliyoasisiwa na kutekelezwa na vihiyo kama wao.
Leo nitawapa faida kwa kuwapa nukuu moja kavu kavu ya gwiji Martin Luther Jr aliyesema, “We must learn to live together as brothers or we perish together like fools.” Tafsiri rahisi ni kwamba tujifunze kuishi pamoja kama ndugu au tukubali kufa pamoja kama wapumbavu. Hii nukuu noma siyo? Inachoma hadi ndani au vipi?
Hivyo bwana Luvu plus vi na wenzako mnaootea kuvuta mibangi na kuitumia kutudanganya, kutuibia, kututisha na kutuburuza mjue hili kuwa tuko kwenye mtumbwi mmoja. Mtu mmoja akitia tobo tutazama wote. Umenoa sana yakhe.
Luvu plus vi anadai eti kama Bunge la Ulaji la Katiba litapitisha uwepo wa siri kali tatu kaya haitatawalika. Uongo mtupu.
Kama imetawalika chini ya siri kali mbili tena zenye kila utata na ujambazi kila aina itashindwaje kutawalika kwa kuwa na siri kali tatu?
Basi mie nasema tena kwa herufi kubwa, TUWE NA SIRIKALI MOJA NA KAYA MOJA SIMPLE AND FINITO. 
Wanaoogopa siri kali tatu ni woga wa kawaida. Hata hivyo, siwezi kumlaumu kihiyo huyu kwa vile hana elimu ya kutosha kujua mambo mepesi.
Wapo mavuvuzela wenzake wengine wanaosema eti siri kali tatu zitatushinda kuzihudumia.
Urongo. Kama tumeweza kuhudumia wezi na majambazi na vihiyo kila aina tutashindwa nini kuhudumia siri kali tatu?
Isitoshe, hata kama sikubaliki na utitiri wa siri tena kali, kama walevi wataamua kuwa wanataka siri kali hata mia, tawile au vipi?
Kama tumeweza kuliwa na kutawaliwa na mabingwa wa kughushi na wengine wengi tutashindwa nini? Kama tumeweza kuwahudumia wauza bwimbwi, majambazi na mafisadi wengi tutashindwa nini? Kama tumeweza kuwahudumia wababaishaji na wazururaji aka Vasco da Gama na misafara yake ughaibuni kila mwaka bila kusahau wachukuaji muwaitao wawekezaji tutashindwa siri kali tatu?
Leo nina usongo na Luku plus vi na wenzake. Natamani nivute mibangi inibangue niende nimbangue mtu kwa manundu na ngeu kama si kumnyotoa roho.Mkome na mkomae huku mkishika adabu na adabu ikiwashika vinginevyo hakitaeleweka.
Salam maalum ni kwa wababaishaji wote wanaolala kitanda kimoja na wachunaji wajiitao wachungaji wakitumia roho mtakakitu wamuitaye roho mtakatifu kuacha kutuchezea kwa kuchanganya politiki na dini. ‘Shame on you!’
Chanzo: Nipashe 26, 2014.

Kanada na kufuru ya utajiri.

Kanada ni nchi yenye idadi ndogo ya watu lakini tajiri sana. Maisha ya wananchi kawaida nchini Kanada yako juu kuliko hata ya majirani zao kusini yaani Marekani. Kwa mujibu wa Statistics Canada, kwa mwaka wakanada wametumia jumla ya dola bilioni 21.4 kwenye ulabu hadi kufikia mwaka wa fedha ulioishia Machi 31, 2013. Kilichovunja rekodi kwa matumizi kwa wakanada ni sigara ambapo walitumia jumla ya dola  bilioni 31.1 Kamari nayo haikubaki nyuma. Kwani jumla ya dola bilioni 13.74 zilitumika kwenye ka mchezo haka. Mwaka 2006 wakanada walitumia dola bilioni moja kwenye ngono huku mihadarati ikitumia karibu nusu ya kiasi hiki. Hii ndiyo jeuri na kufuru ya utajiri. Nchi yenye watu milioni 34 inaunguza pesa kuliko bara zima la Afrika!

WHY AFRICA NEEDS OPPOSITION IN POWER

Former Senegalese president, Professor of law Abdulaye Wade enters history books though controversially.  Wade is renowned for attempting to break the law he’d swore to defend and promote by tampering with the constitution in order to stay in power longer than the constitution stipulates.

Wade recently added another feather  in his cap as far as corruption is concerned. It came to light that Karim, his son and heir apparent, he once groomed and cladded to take over is now facing corruption charges. Authorities found that Karim is worth $1,400,000,000. To put it in the perspective, Karim is a billionaire by all standards. This humungous amount is over 30% of Senegal’s external debt of $ 4.22 bn as of 2012.  Karim’s ill-gotten wealth is way prodigious to that of Andrew Banda’s that’s arrested in 2012 for just having $ 70,000 on his account.  A-million-grand question is: what did he do to justifiably acquire or make such a fortune? Simple, he did one thing, to be the son of the president of Senegal.

Again, if one son can rip-off such ginormous amount, what of other children, wives, friends and courtiers and their families and friends? This tells you how Africa isn’t supposed to languish in begging, self-degrading and loaning had she had blameable, trustworthy and accountable leaders not thieves and their families.

What’s more, under his father’s regime, Karim, just like any neo-African prince, was untouchable. He was power in himself simply because he was the son of the most powerful man in the land. Just like Seif al Islam Gaddafi who fell from grace after his father was butchered, Karim was everything as far as power in Senegal was concerned. Differently from Gaddafi, Karim didn’t have many brothers to compete with.

According to the BBC, Karim’s been behind bars for over a year now. Karim’s days became numbered when president Macky Sall from opposition won presidency just the same Michael Satta did in Zambia. Africa needs opposition in power so that it can fry such sharks and spend their loot on providing social services.

Karim isn’t alone in this game-cum-duel of mugging the paupers using his father’s office. In South Africa, Duduzane Zuma rakes in much money thanks to his partnership with Gupta family. The Guptas and Duduzane preferentially receive many government lucrative tenders through which they print and mint millions simply because they have partnered with the son of president.

Another notable prince is Theodore Nguema  Obiang Mangue of Equatorial Guinea. In 2012 the US department of Justice filed a suit asking to attack Mangue’s assets worth over $ 70,000,000. If this son of president owns such assets only in the US, how much is he worth?

Power in Africa is about prince and princes either in sons, wives or daughters of presidents. This is why 41-year- old Isabel Dos Santos of Angola, first African billionaire comes in. A billionaire by world standards, Isabel, the daughter of long time Angolan president Jose Eduardo dos Santos, isn't a poor girl. The Mail in early January last year wrote this about her, “Those stakes combined with other assets push her net worth over the $1 billion mark." According to Forbes Magazine 2013 Isabel is worth three billion dollars and her wedding ceremony did cost four million dollars.  

Another prince in the list is Ridhiwan Kikwete the son of President Jakaya Kikwete who recently won his father’s constituency of Chalinze and became its new Member of Parliament. Though his wealth is not yet known, East Africa has its own Karim in Ridhiwan Kikwete, Ridhiwan, like, Duduzane and his sister Duduzile, is alleged to have many connections with business people who use him to win lucrative tenders from his father’s government.

Going back to Karim, how many Karim does Africa have?  How much have such Karim stolen from government coffers or through their wheeler dealers? If a prince can cause such a damage to our coffers, how much “African kings and queens and their honchos” deprive us?

If anything, had Africa’d a compos mentis and trustworthy crop of leaders, obviously, she’d not languish in poverty she has always been forced to be in. where do we get such leaders? Just vote opposition so that those exiting scene would keep them in check and balance. For, once the long-time ruling parties keep on winning this means their hush-hush will always be kept and thus keep on robbing the hoi polloi in the continent. It is as simple as this. Vote opposition and instruct it to look into the past or vote for the status quo and suffer even more.

It’d be underscored. If African countries that are facing such stinking corruption involving the first families and their major-doms, need to vote the opposition in so that it can sweep the state house as it’s occurred in Senegal and Zambia.

Source: The African Executive Magazine April 23, 2014.

Lukuvi hatishii, analidhalilisha jeshi na Kikwete

VYOMBO vya habari vilimkariri Waziri wa Nchi, Ofisi ya Waziri Mkuu (Sera, Uratibu na Bunge), William Lukuvi akipiga kampeni ambazo wakosoaji wake waliziita chafu na za kichovu kuhusiana na pendekezo la kuwa na serikali tatu.

Wengi waliona kama anachofanya ni kuingiza siasa na fitina makanisani, jambo ambalo ni kinyume cha sheria. CCM wamekuwa wakitutahadharisha kutochanganya siasa na dini. Wakosoaji wa Lukuvi wanahoji: “Kwanini wapinzani wakifanya kama alivyofanya Lukuvi wanaonekana kama wamechanganya dini na siasa, lakini CCM wakichanganya vitu hivi tena kichovu inakuwa halali?”

Lukuvi alikaririwa hivi karibuni akijivua nguo yeye na bosi wake Rais Jakaya Kikwete alimvumilia hata baada ya kutuhumiwa kughushi sifa za kitaaluma akisema: “Mimi nataka serikali mbili kwa sababu tumeshazoea kusali chini ya miti tukiwa na amani na tukiwa na serikali tatu tutasali kwa mtutu.

Kama umeshindwa kuwatunza wanawake wawili ulionao, je, huyo wa tatu ambaye humjui tabia yake utamtunzaje?” Jibu la swali lake ni rahisi. Kama umeshindwa wake wawili basi baki na mmoja au kuwaacha wote.

Hata hivyo, hapa kusali chini ya miti na mtutu wa bunduki vinaingiaje kama si kuishiwa na kufilisika kifikira hata kisiasa kwa Lukuvi na wenzake wanaotaka kutumia kampeni na propaganda uchwara kuwahadaa wananchi?

Je, bado wanadhani kuwa Watanzania ni majuha na mataahira wa kutishiwa kwa kila upuuzi? Kwanini Lukuvi na mabwana zake hawataki kutambua kuwa kizazi cha sasa ni kipya cha ‘dot com’ kilichoelimika na kisichotishwatishwa kipuuzi?

Licha ya kuonyesha utovu wa nidhamu, busara na hekima, Lukuvi amemdhalilisha bosi wake Rais Kikwete. Kimsingi amebainisha kuwa uwezo wa kufikiri unaonekana kuwa mdogo kutokana na elimu kidogo.

Hata hivyo, Kikwete anapaswa ajilaumu. Kwani zilipotolewa tuhuma za kughushi vyeti vyake vya kitaaluma, hakumchukulia hatua zaidi ya kujifanya hasikii.

Sasa anaanza kujifichua kiasi cha kumuacha Kikwete bila nguo. Je, kwanini Kikwete alinyamazia tuhuma hizi? Je, aliamua kuwaacha mawaziri waliotuhumiwa kughushi kwa kuhofia kuwa na watu mahiri na makini kwenye baraza lake la mawaziri ili wasimfunike?

Katika kampeni zake chovu na mfu Lukuvi aliongeza: “Serikali tatu zikipita ni wazi kuwa hata makanisa yatafungwa kwani nchi haiwezi kuwa na amani tena, angalieni nchi ya Korea Kusini na Korea Kaskazini ambao waligawanyika na sasa ni maadui wakubwa wanaokaa mipakani wamenyoosheana bunduki.”

Lukuvi angeonyesha ukweli na mashiko ya madai yake kwa kufafanua ni kwanini hali itakuwa hivyo. Tumuulize Lukuvi, anamaanisha nini? Je, kuna mpango wa CCM kutumia jeshi kupora madaraka au ni kuishiwa na kufilisika kisiasa au vitisho vya kutaka kuendelea kuwa madarakani?

Huwezi ukalinganisha Korea Kaskazini na Korea Kusini nchi ambazo ziligawanywa na nguvu ya nje, lakini si wananchi wenyewe, vinginevyo unaonyesha usivyojua historia ya nchi hizi au kile unachosema.

Hata wakati wenyewe na sababu ya kugawanywa kwa Korea mbili ni tofauti kabisa na kinachoendelea Tanzania.

Sijui kama Lukuvi anajua anachosema au ameamua kwa makusudi kupotosha ukweli huku akitoa vitisho vya kitoto. Huenda anamaanisha anachosema kutokana na elimu na uwezo kiduchu wa kufikiri.

Kama wananchi wanataka serikali tatu hakuna wa kuwatisha wala kuwazuia. Hata hilo jeshi analoongelea ni lao. Isitoshe tangu Umoja wa Mataifa uharamishe mapinduzi, nani aogope jeshi kuchukua madaraka?

Inaonekana Lukuvi hajui hata kitu rahisi kama hiki. Mambo ya kutishia nyago na nyau yeshapitwa na wakati na anayeyatumia ima ni mshamba au mjinga anayepaswa kuwa shule.

Wakati wa kuanzisha utaratibu wa vyama vingi, wachovu kama Lukuvi walikuja na vitisho hivyo. Bahati nzuri Baba wa Taifa Mwalimu Julius Nyerere alisikia huu upuuzi na kuingilia kati na kushauri vyama vingi viruhusiwe kwa vile vilikuwa haviepukiki.

Kadhalika Lukuvi na wenye mawazo mgando kama yeye lazima wajulishwe. Serikali tatu haziepukiki. Hivyo, watafute sababu nyingine ya kutumia fujo kuendelea kuwa madarakani kwa kuhofia kuondolewa wakaishia gerezani kutokana na dhuluma, ufisadi waliofanya kwa muda mrefu.

Lukuvi aliendelea kujivua nguo alipokaririwa akisema: “Unajua jeshi haliwezi kukaa na bunduki bila fedha. Hiyo serikali ya tatu ambayo jeshi litakuwa chini yake haina vyanzo vya mapato vya kueleweka, sasa hao wanajeshi watalipwa nini? Wenye mitutu watakubali kuishi bila fedha?” Pesa inaingiaje hapa? Je, jeshi letu linaendeshwa kwa utii kwa wananchi au kuhongwa fedha au kuabudiwa kama anavyotaka kubainisha Lukuvi? Kwanza, anapaswa aliombe jeshi msamaha huku akipelekwa mahakamani kwa uchochezi na hata uhaini.

Laiti Rais Kikwete asingekuwa mtu wa kuvumilia mambo ya ajabu kama haya, Lukuvi angeozea gerezani. Ni upuuzi na ujinga wa hali ya juu kusema kuwa jeshi linaweza kuwazuia wananchi wanachotaka au kuwaamria jinsi watakavyotawaliwa.

Hilo jeshi halilipwi mishahara toka mfukoni mwa CCM bali wananchi wenyewe. Lukuvi alipaswa abanwe aeleze ni jeshi lipi linalotaka kuleta vurugu kwa kupinga msimamo na chaguo la wananchi ili livunjwe hata kushughulikiwa. Maana Tanzania ni nchi ya kidemokrasia isiyopaswa kutishwa na yeyote ndani na nje.

Wanaosema eti serikali tatu hazitakuwa na vyanzo vya mapato ni wendawazimu au wanahitaji kupimwa akili zao. Ukiangalia pesa ambayo imekuwa ikipotea chini ya utawala mbovu wa CCM, kuanzia misamaha ya kodi, kutosimamia mapato, matumizi mabovu hasa ufujaji, wizi na kila aina ya jinai, zinatosha kuendesha hata serikali kumi. Lukuvi anadhani wananchi hawajui ukweli huu?

Kama Lukuvi angekuwa ameelimika, angejua kuwa serikali tatu au mbili au moja zina vyanzo vya mapato kwa vile haziongozi hewa bali pande la nchi liitwalo Tanzania, lenye kila rasilimali kuanzia watu, ardhi, mito, maziwa, madini na kila kitu.

Chanzo: Tanzania Daima Aprili 23, 2014.

Kijiwe kumchukulia hatua Lukuviii

BAADA ya Waziri Bill Lukuviii kutangaza mapinduzi dhidi ya mamlaka ya wachovu, kijiwe kimekaa kama kamati kumpa vipande vyake pamoja na kumtaka bosi wake amwajibishe kabla wana kijiwe hawajamtokea na vikombe vya kahawa na kumwacha na ngeu.

Wa kwanza leo kuingia ni Kapende. Leo kauramba kweli kweli. Alivyochomekea suruali yake utadhani matapeli wa Kikongo ambao kila ukutanaye naye ni mwanamuziki. Utasikia anasema: “Moi, je suis musicien et nakobina ndombolo.”

Mara Mgosi Machungi anaingia akiwa anavuta tasbihi yake. Anasema: “Mmemsikia  huyu mpuuuuziiii anayetaka kututishia nyau akitetea upuuzi wao?”

Kapende anachomekea: “Unaongelea huyu kihiyo aliyeghushi vyeti vya taaluma Bill Lukuviii? Sijui kwanini Njaa Kaya naye anamng’ang’ania pamoja na kupokea tuhuma zake? Nasikia jamaa kaenda kuropokea kanisani asijue anachanganya dini na siasa.”

“Nani amtimue nani iwapo wote wamoja?” Anachomekea Mijjinga aliyekuwa akibofya kisimu chake.

“Huwezi kwenda madhabahuni ukafanya uhuni ukaachwa. Kana ni nsikitini watu wanramba bakora huyu. Mwasema tusichanganye siasa na dini wakati nyie mwazichanganya na kuzidhalilisha dini?” anachomekea Mpemba.

Mipawa anakwanyua mic. “Huyu wala hana dini na kama anayo basi ni kujikomba na kughushi. Anadhani mazabe yake hayafahamiki? Ashukuru Mungu Njaa Kaya anamlinda kwa sababu ajuazo. Jitu limekimbia umande halafu linatangaza ukihiyo wake bila hata aibu. Ficheni ujinga wenu na kuonyesha busara jamanini.”

Sofi Lion aka Kanungaembe kaguswa pabaya. Anadandia mic.“Mie sioni makosa ya Bill hasa ikizingatiwa kuwa kuna watu wanahubiri shari. Hivi hamkumbuki yaliyotokea Rwanda jamani?”

Kanji kama ada hawezi kutomtetea mshirika wake. Anadungua mic. “Ile tokea Rwanda hapana tokea hapa. Sisi iko country ya amani bana. Ile yote nataka leta vita hapana jua baya ya vita.”

Kapende anatia tena timu. “Kanji kamwambie kada mwenzako Lukuviii kuwa hatudanganyiki wala kutishika. Vita ataileta yeye anayetaka kupindua sirikali yake mwenyewe.”

Msomi aliyekuwa kimya wakati wote anaamua kuingilia kati. “Waheshimiwa, sioni uhusiano na mauaji ya kimbari ya Rwanda ambayo Bi. Sofi anataka kututisha nayo. Nadhani mauaji ya Rwanda yalisababishwa na utawala kama huu wa akina Lukuviii, unashikilia usanii na visingizio badala ya kuangalia ukweli. This guy must be told to his face that he is a goon. How dare he compare Rwanda and us?”

Mbwamwitu anaamua kuingiza utani wake. “Nasikia Rwanda walighushi sana kama Lukuviii kiasi cha kujisahau kuwa yana mwisho. Kwanza, wanaotaka kutumia yaliyotokea Rwanda hapa wanapaswa kuambiwa wakaombe na wakaiombe Rwanda msamaha kabla haijawashukia.” Kijiwe hakina mbavu.

Mgosi aliyekuwa akiongea kwenye simu na bi mkubwa wake, tena kwa kupaza sauti kutokana na kutomuachia uchache wa mboga anaamua kutia guu. “Huyu Ukuvi hana adabu na anapaswa ashike adabu kabua ya kumshikisha adabu. Ana bahati. Angesema huu upupu na utumbo wake wakati wa Mchonga si angefikia lupango.”

“Pamoja na kuchonga kwenye kilongalonga ulikuwa unayanyaka maongezi yetu siyo?” Anatania Mchunguliaji.

Mpemba wala hangoji Mgosi ajibu. Anakwanyua mic. “Yakhe mie anshangaza huyu kilaza wallahi. Hivi kama serikali mbili hazikuleta vita pamoja na ufisadi huu wote, tatu zitaletaje vita?”

Mipawa naye anakula mic. “Ami nadhani useme wazi kuwa tuwe na sirikali moja ili kuepuka huu wizi na usanii tunaofanyiwa mchana kweupe. Mie naona wote wanatuchanganya, wawe wa sirikali mbili au tatu. Kwanini wanaogopa sirikali moja ambayo itaondoa ngoa na fitina na ngebe?”

Mpemba anamkata Mipawa jicho la chuki na kukwanyua mic. “Si Visiwani twapinga sirikali moja. Twataka tatu ili tusimezwe.”

Mipawa anafyatua swali la haraka haraka. “Nyie mkitumeza sawa. Kwanini nasi tusiwameze japo kidogo?”

“Yakhe sasa naawe wageuka Lukuviii wallahi. Sie twawameza vipi?” Mpemba anajaribu kujitetea.

Mipawa anazidi kumsonga Mpemba kwa kusema: “Hujui siyo? Kwani huo wali mnaomeza na kuja kutanua huku wakati sie tukienda kwenu mnatusingizia kila jinai huoni? Tukiacha uvivu wa kufikiri na ujanja ujanja, nyie mmetumeza sana. Kwenye kila pembe kuanzia sirikalini hadi mitaani mpo, lakini sisi hatupo kwenu.”

Msomi kuona jinsi ambavyo mambo yanaanza kwenda ndiyo siyo, anaamua kuokoa jahazi. Anakohoa kidogo na kusema: “Naona sasa tunaelekea kubaya. Hakuna haja ya kuanza kubaguana tokana na tunakotoka. Kukata mzizi wa fitina nami nakubaliana na sirikali moja. Maana itaondoa migongano, matumizi mabaya, kutuhumiana, kutumiana na kunyonyana na kuburuzana. Husikii watu wa Kigoma au Lushoto wakilalamikia watu wa Dar au Moshi wala Arusha.”

Anakunywa kahawa yake na kuendelea: “Turejee kwa huyu Lukuviii anayetaka kupotosha umma. Kama kuna vita inakuja basi watakaoisababisha ni wale wanaotaka kutuhadaa, kututisha na kutuburuza kama akina Lukuviii na genge lake la walaji waliofilisika kulhali. Wachovu hawawezi kutoa mapendekezo yao halafu ukaanza kuwatisha. Kwani hii katiba ni ya watawala au watawaliwa?”

“Nadhani anachosema Msomi ni cha kuungwa mkono. Hawa wanaodhani kuwa wataendelea kututishia nyau na kutuburuza ili watuibie wapaswa wajue mambo yamebadilika.”

“Nyie hamjui. Jamaa wanaogopa kuondolewa kwenye ulaji na siri zao kufichuka wakaishia lupango kutokana na wizi waliotufanyia.” Anachomekea Kapende.

“Haki ya Mungu titakuja kutoa mtu roho. Imetiibia miaka yote. Inazani sisi ni wapumbavu kama huyu Ukuvi siyo?” Mgosi anaamua kuzoza kwa hasira.

Mbwa Mwitu anaamua kuchomekea. “Kesho utasikia na kilaza na kihiyo kama huyu eti kapewa tuzo ya utendaji bora wakati ni balaa kwa kaya yetu. Natamani niende huko Dodoma na kuliramba bakora. Sijui ni kwanini wale mabingwa matusi toka Zenj hawakulirushia matusi ya nguoni lilipoanza kuropa?”

“Kaka usinikumbushe wana mipasho na mabingwa wa kufyatua matusi kama yule mama aliyemwambia mwenzie kuwa kashaufyatua sana hadi kazaa watoto watatu.” Anasema Mzee Maneno.

“Kesha ufyatua nini?” Anauliza Mbwa Mwitu.

Mzee Maneno anajibu: “Kamuulize mwenyewe maana mambo mengine yataka uwe fyatu kweli kuyatamka hadharani.”

Kijiwe kikiwa kinanoga si likapita shumbwengu la Lukuviii. Wacha tulifukuze huku tukilitukana matusi ya kizenj. Bahati yake dereva wake aliwahi, vinginevyo tungemtia adabu.

Chanzo: Tanzania Daima Aprili 23, 2014.

Kipanya na wajumbe wa Bunge la Katiba

Thanks Msekwa for union mystery solving

 

       The highly-guarded hush-hush of the union of Tanganyika and Zenj’s now an open secret. Pius Msekwa, former vice chair, did this tremendous job timely, nicely and in style. He tried to defend the founders averring that they didn’t usurp power in forming the union while they actually did. He defended them saying the situation of the time necessitated them to make such imperative decision without the say-so of the wananchi. We now know. The founders of the union reached their verdict in a hurry. As if this wasn’t enough, they made the union a top secret pointlessly.

     Many’d like to know why such an important matter supposed to be of national interest was kept a top hush-hush from wananchi who were supposed to be instrumental in every step of its inception. Why secrecy? Why hurry? You now know why.

      Msekwa says that there’s fear of capitalism and counterrevolution from the sultan whom Sheikh Murume disposed. Therefore, secrecy and sidelining the wananchi was justified. So too, such secrecy’s institutionalized thereafter in the sense that up till now, the fourth phase rulers have kept the union their top secret as if it is a sequestered matter. The founders based their defence for hurriedly grasped union on the fear of the time. Why keep the same top-secret while the circumstances that “forced” the founder to do so have changed histrionically?

     What’s more, Msekwa came out of the closet saying that our union’s the creature of fear but not history, comradeship, collaboration and will as our founders and their successors have always maintained in their mantras.  It seems that fear affected them badly and all times so as to create even imaginative foes today which force them to demonize whoever argues them to improve the union. It seems. It’s this fear that forced President Jake Kiquette to break the law and constitution when he addressed the Constituent Assembly recently. It is this fear that’s always haunted and swamped Chama Cha Mizengwe (CCM) and its honchos, shenanigans and spin doctors, carry-ons to conspire to sabotage wananchi’s views of wanting three –tier government. It’s this fear that’s always made Zenjiz to cower and fear of being swallowed by Bara unnecessarily.  When Zenj swallowed Tanganyika, the same cabal of top dogs didn’t worry or bother!  Zenj’s now flexing her muscles as she reclaims more power by reducing union matters.  Nobody’s worried! Why?

      Ironically, the father of Zenj Mzee Karume wanted one government and he’s not regarded as a traitor or an enemy of the union as those agitating for one government are. It’s this fear that’s become an obstacle hampering us from aiming at one government that Karume wanted though Nyerere dispirited him because of unfound fear of being regarded as Tanganyika’s swallowed Zenj. Ni woga tu.

     Msekwa disclosed that Mzee Mchonga and Sheikh Karumee aimed at one government. They simply increased union staples hoping that one day they’d find themselves with a union government that’d taken all powers from the two existing governments. This was there simple way of ending up with one government that CCM doesn’t want to hear for fear of provoking and annoying Baraza la Maulaji Zenj (BMZ).  Msekwa wanted the founders to look good; little did he know that his revelation’s more damning than he thought.

     Msekwa went ahead some more miles saying that Mzee Mchonga convened the parliament to ratify the proposal for the union. Well Msekwa, did the MPs ask their employers namely wananchi if they’re ready for the union resulting from fear but not their will? Msekwa can’t answer this. Wow! The union of fear creates fear fear fear fear ad infinitum. Now you know why fear’s deciding everything even in Bunge la Katiba, just fear fear only fear.

     Another thorny issue Msekwa once gave his testament upon has to do with the articles of union. Where are they? Two hellholes we love to call govt and ruling party swallowed them. These mighty documents will nary be seen till the coming of Jesus.

      When Attorney General of Zenj, Othman Masoud Othman was asked what he knows about union document he’s this to say, “I have never seen that document.” If such an institution’s nary seen the document who else has and why? I can’t speculate about what Mainland AG Freddie Wee-Lema would have said given that he’s busy defending his  pals who stashed our money in Jersey, Switzerland, Cayman island and elsewhere.

      There’s another jaw-dropping narrative that the document was lodged at the United Nations. Nonetheless, Moses Machali, MP and member of CA disputed allegations that the document‘s wedged at the UN. He’s quoted as saying, “Well, we thought we would understand. But they have never produced that document…. They respond that the Union articles were taken to United Nations… what type of the nation that can take its articles to keep them while the government does not have them?” Sadly, no sane person’s ever offered any sane response to Machali’s question. The imbroglio’s still going on.

     Despite all polemics, thanks Msekwa for union mystery solving.

Source: Guardian April 20, 2014.