When I say egomaniacs I mean it with all gravitas. Don’t confuse it with egonomics by Thomas Schelling or ergonomics. Also don’t mix it with egoeconomics. For those who do not know what egomaniacs are should worry not. As we discuss this dichotomy they‘ll know what it actually is. Under mzee Mchonga, we used to have Ujamaa and Kujitegemea or Socialism and Self-reliance which we buried in 1992 under ruksagonomics. Thereafter we invented Uhujumaa and Kujimegea namely Sabotage and Selfishly-self-serving.
The cardinal rule of egomaniacs is simple. Tell people to do what you don’t do even if you’re mandatory required to do. For instance, tell all your subjects to declare their wealth and that of their spouses and children but never declare yours. So too, tell the earthlings paupers and hoi polloi to pay tax so that you can spend as please. Under this hypocrisy, sorry, hypothesis I’m afraid. Donors would know how poor you are and laugh at you. Who wants to know that you’re living a mansion worth billions of shillings? Those you call your people (subjects) like a bogeyman, nobody is ready to volunteer to tell you that you are evil. They all laugh as if they are satisfied. Whatever you do to them, however pity and hurtful it is, they’ll cheer you calling you all good names while at their hearts you’re but a monster who does not deserve even a second to live. Indeed once this deceptive life goes on unnoticed, you remain everybody’s bogeyman including yourself. Whatever you say is right even if it is a lie. The clangor of your voice is music for every ear even if what you utter are merely insults like the ones that were once uttered by his excellence so and so that students who become pregnant is just because of their kiherehere.
You pointlessly screw them in the name of investment like Ben Tunituni Nkapu did a few years ago. He allocated Kiwila Coal Mine to himself and his partners and this was the right thing to do according to him. He got away with it when Jake Kiquette stepped in and said that we’d not bother mzee Ben. To add salt to injuries you mindlessly just sign bogus contracts that serve your vested interests especially ten percent on the expenses of those who goofed to vote for you. Thereafter you tell the waliwa that there is no way their hunk can develop without Uchukuaji you just give a good name of Uwekezaji. You just ‘build’ the country with skeleton in the closet and no literati or academics see this and attack it. If one dares, you just declare him non-citizen as it once happened to Brother General Ulimwengu. Do you remember that?
Another thing is you make sure that your ulaji policies become omerta if not Holy Grail through your make-believe philosophy. To seal fate of waliwa you make sure that demagoguery becomes a magic bullet for everything namely lies; empty promises and whatnot are employed.
Another wonderful thing to do is allow investors to offer social services instead of the power that be and use this to allow the investors to mine minerals and do other business by self-service and self-supervision. Instead of being a supervisor you just become a mere parasite if not a mere sitting duck. If you discover that there are some dissenting voices you just create real and unreal enemies of the nation.
Use power with your family members and friends if you are president, for example, your wife kinds and bootlickers also are good players. Under this philosophy of eating frenzy, make sure that all those who oppose your style of doing things are given bad names such as blackmailers, self-seekers and what have you. Call them bad names before they call you bad names you deservedly must be given. Let them know that you are untouchable-cum-infallible in whatever you do or contemplate.
Under egomaniacs those with power are charged with spending taxes paid by the paupers whose obligation is to pay tax) to enable the high and the might to spend as please on their behalf. Therefore, see to it that everybody is paying tax failure of which is to disturb your peace something that guarantees prison sentence.
Anther footprint of egomaniacs is to see to it that you steal whatever you can put hand on. Public property at this stage is turned into private-cum-family property. Never mind about the Achilles’ heel that can follow in the future. Importantly, to do away from this menace, make sure you appoint your protege to run for president when your time in office comes to an end. This is the science and nobody shall ignore it. Shall anybody ignore it he’ll be digging his own grave. Who wants to make his own Waterloo in the first place?
In a nutshell, it must be clearly underscored that ulaji is continuum of tilting the pendulum towards your favour. To cap it all, make sure that all dangerous institutions that can poke holes into your activities or investigate you are under your control. You must act as a shaman who does not let his knowledge to be open for anybody except himself and the one he intends to pass the baton to. Lastly though not least, make sure you bewitchingly tweak the system before things get out of hand offhand.
Source: Thisday Oct., 7, 2013.
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