Kijiwe chataka ianzishwe mahakama ya kadhia

BAADA ya Waislamu nchini kuhanikiza wakitaka, pamoja na mambo mengine, na kama, sore, mahakama ya kadhi mkuu, nasi wana kijiwe tumeamua kupitisha azimio la kuitaka sirikali iridhie tuanzishe mahakama ya kadhia, sambamba na hii ya kadhi kama itairuhusu.

Tuna sababu nuzuhu na nzuri tu kutaka ianzishwe mahakama hii tukufu ya kadhia ambayo, kimsingi, itaikomboa kaya kutoka kwenye meno na makucha ya majizi wachache wanaotumia vibaya mamlaka.

Kwa ufupi lengo la mahakama hii ni kupambana na dhambi kuu iitwayo ufisadi ambayo mara nyingi inatendwa na mafala wanaojiona wajanja wakati ni mafala tu.

Chini ya mahakama yetu, mafisi na mafisadi wote watavuliwa nguo na kuchapwa bakora kabla ya kunyongwa hadharani ili liwe somo kwa wote wenye mawazo finyu na hulka za kifisi na kifisadi.

Pia chini ya mahakama yetu ya kadhia, atakayezini na akabainika amefanya hivyo, kama atakuwa mwanaume, shurti abakwe na mwanamke azibwe sehemu yake ya dhambi ili asirudie kitendo hiki kichafu.

Mwanamume atapigwa picha akifanyiwa ufirauni huu ili zisambazwe ajulikane alivyo cho…wahalifu wengine tutakaoshughulikia ni wale wanaoghushi vyeti na shahada ili wapate ulaji.

Hawa tutawapofua macho ili wasiweze kuona tena na kwa hiyo waanze kuomba omba badala ya kukiibia kijiwe. Pia tutawakata mkono wa kulia ili wasile tena mali ya umma. Ikumbukwe.

Sisi hatuna magereza. Hivyo adhabu zetu nyingi ni kufagia viungo na kunyotoa roho. Unadhani bila magereza kama tutapendekeza vifungo tutawafungia wapi zaidi ya kuadhirika?

Pia chini ya mahakama hii, tutahalalisha pombe na kupiga marufuku ulevi, hasa ule wa madaraka. Wale wote waliokwisha kukumbwa na ugonjwa wa kulewa madaraka, watafungwa maisha ili kuepusha kuiharibu jamii.

Kwa atakaye kunywa pombe akalewa adhabu yake ni kwamba akiingia peponi baada ya kurudisha namba atakunywa soda na maji baridi tu. Maana atakuwa amefanya kosa kubwa, yaani uchoyo na kuvuka kiwango kilichowekwa cha kunywa kwa ajili ya afya.

Wanaume watapaswa wavae ninja, nao waonje joto ya kuivaa hasa sehemu zenye joto kama vile pwani. Pia tutafanya hivyo ili kina mama wasiwatamani.

Atakayegundulika kutembea bila kuvaa ninja atachapwa bakora hamsini na kupigwa marufuku kutoka nje kwa miaka mitano. Dini yetu inahimiza wanaume wavae ninja ili kuleta usawa na suluhisho baina ya jinsia mbili ambazo zimekuwa zikinyonyana na kutumikishana ukiachia kudhalilishana.

Mahakama yetu inatamka wazi kuwa wanaume wengi ni waongo wa kupindukia. Ni mabingwa wa kutoa ahadi lakini wasitekeleze. Ni mabingwa wa usanii na ujambazi mbuzi.

Wanawaahidi kina mama kuwapeleka Kanani, wanaishia kuwapeleka motoni. Waongo wote watakatwa midomo ya juu ili kila wapitapo wajulikane na wananchi wawaepuke na kutowasikiliza.

Pia chini ya mahakama ya kadhia, itakuwa ruksa kuchanganya dini na siasa. Chini ya mahakama hii, watu wa dini watafanya siasa kwa kujificha nyuma ya majoho yao na wanasiasa watatumia nyumba za ibada kueneza siasa zao.

Katika mahakama ya kadhia, dini na siasa vinachanganyikana na haviwaki kama ambavyo matapeli fulani wamekuwa wakiwatisha wanakijiwe ilhali wao wanavichanganya vitu hivi.

Pia mahakama yetu itatoa tangazo la thamani kwa binadamu. Mwanamke mmoja ana thamani sawa na wanaume watatu. Tulifikia ugunduzi huu baada ya kubaini kuwa wanaume wengi ni mafisadi na mafisi kuliko wanawake na wanadanganywa kirahisi na nyumba zao ndogo kama tulivyoona kwa Kingungo Ngumbaru Mwehu pale Ubungo, Benjaa Makapa na Anibeni, Dadi Balallii, Njaa Kaya anavyotumiwa na Salama Hatari kwa sasa na Anna Mgando na wengine wengi. Hivyo hata kwenye mahakama yetu, ushahidi wa mwanamke utakuwa na nguvu kuliko wa wanaume wawili hata watatu.

Pia wanaume wamegundulika kuwa waharibifu kupindukia. Wanawatelekeza hata watoto ukiachia mbali kuwazalisha ovyo kina mama wanaowakimbia na kuwaachia watoto. Pia uchunguzi wetu umegundua kuwa wanaume wengi hupoteza pesa nyingi kwenye nyama choma, manywaji na nyumba ndogo.

Hivyo kuwakomesha ni kuwatungia sheria ngumu ili kuwaadhibu na kuwadhibiti. Pia chini ya mahakama yetu, wanaume watakuwa wakipeleka watoto kliniki na kuwalisha wawapo nyumbani.

Pia mahakama yetu itahalalisha kiti moto ili kupunguza bei ya nyama ya ng’ombe na kuzidi kuuawa kwa viumbe hawa wasio na hatia. Tutafanya hivyo ili kuangalia kama kweli homa ya nguruwe H1N1 ni hatari. Tutawatumia watu wetu kufanyia majaribio kama wanavyotumiwa na mafisadi wa kiutawala kwa sasa.

Mahakama tukufu ya kadhia pia inatamka wazi kuwa imani asilia ndizo zitoe muongozo wa kuendesha kaya badala ya hizi nyemelezi za kikoloni na kimapokeo. Chini ya mahakama hii, majina yote ya kigeni na kishenzi yatafutwa na dini zote zitaomba radhi kwa umma kwa kutuita washenzi, makafiri na wapagani.

Chini ya mahakama hizi, dini zote nyemelezi na za kimapokeo zitatozwa kodi kubwa kutokana na kuchuma mahali ambapo hazikupanda, hasa kwa njia ya sadaka.

Tutapiga marufuku matangazo ya miujiza ya kiwizi ya kuwaibia wanakijiwe huku tukipiga marufuku makelele ya mahubiri na kuitana kwenda kusali.

Chini ya mahakama ya kadhia, rais atapaswa kuwa mtu asiye na dini yoyote ya kimapokeo isipokuwa ya asilia. Na kaya itaendeshwa kwa sheria za mizimu na mababu.

Chini ya mahakama ya kadhia, wafadhili wote watapaswa kutulipa riba wanapotukopesha maana sisi ni watu wa nchi takatifu tupaswao kufaidi utajiri na matunda ya mataifa ya nchi nyingine.

Pia chini ya mahakama ya kadhia, wakoloni weupe wataruhusiwa kurejea ili kuwaondoa hawa weusi ambao wamethibitisha kuwa wezi, walafu na wenye roho mbaya ukiachia mbali upogo na upofu.

Chini ya mahakama ya kadhia, umri wa kuoa au kuolewa ni miaka 30 ili wahusika wawe wameishaanza kujitegemea na kufundwa. Hakuna cha kuonjana au ‘engagements’ ambazo zimeonekana kuwa kichaka cha umalaya.

Pia chini ya mahakama hii tukufu, watuhumiwa wote wa ufisadi hawataruhusiwa kukaribia nyumba za ibada wala kutoa michango na misaada yao huko.

Pia chini ya mahakama hii, wanasiasa watakaogundulika kuwadanganya wananchi, watakatwa midomo na kufungwa ili wasiendelee kuiharibu jamii.

Sheria ya mahakama ya kadhia itatangaza wazi kuwa Bunge, ikulu na sehemu nyingine za usanii zigeuzwe mabaa ili watakaoingia humo wajulikane ni walevi ambao ulafi wao utawakosesha manywaji huko peponi.

Chini ya mahakama ya kadhia, waheshimiwa wote wanaoutumia uheshimiwa kuwaibia walala njaa wataitwa wadharauliwa na watakaogundulika kuendelea kuwaibia wananchi, adhabu yao itakuwa ni kuvishwa magunia na kutandikwa bakora uchi hadi warejeshe pesa yote waliyolipwa kwa kuhadaa umma.

Chini ya mahakama yetu tukufu, wezi wote walioibia kaya watanyongwa bila kujali kama walikuwa wakubwa au wadogo. Kwa mfano baada ya kupitishwa mahakama hii, wezi wenu wa Kiwira, EPA, Kagoda, Richmond, watauawa kwa kuchomwa moto kama vibaka ili liwe somo kwa wengine wanaopanga kufanya makufuru kama haya.

Pia tutafufua makaburi ya wale waliokufa bila kuadhibiwa na kuzichapa bakora maiti kabla ya kuzizika kwenye mashimo ya taka. Kwa wale waliokimbiziwa nje ya nchi, tutatuma mahakimu wetu wawahukumu huko huko na nchi itakayokataa kushirikiana nasi, basi watu wake watakuwa halali yetu tutakapowateka.

Huu ni mwanzo wa madai. Baada ya kupata mahakama ya kadhia, tutadai na kodi ziendeshwe kwa imani ya dini yetu huku tukihanikiza baadhi ya mambo yapigwe marufuku.

Tutapiga marufuku kuongezeka kwa watu wasio wa dini yetu ya asili. Tutawarejesha kwenye kundi ima kwa pesa, ulaghai hata nguvu ili mradi tuwe na wafuasi wengi tuweze kuitawala kaya na hatimaye dunia nzima.
Chanzo: Tanzania Daima Julai, 29.2009.

Kilango, Selelii na wengine someni ya Wilfred Kajeke

IF "I have this mandate to stop this reckless and irresponsible mortgaging of our country and I cannot do it, then there is no reason for me to continue being in this House. That is why I am leaving, not for a UN job, rather, to liberate my conscience.”

Tafsiri: “Kama mamlaka haya niliyo nayo (ya kuwa mbunge) hayawezi kuzuia uchuuzi huu wa nchi yetu, na siwezi, basi sina sababu ya kuendelea kuwa kwenye bunge hili. Na hii ndiyo sababu naondoka, si kwa kupata kazi Umoja wa Mataifa bali kujikomboa.”

Haya ni maneno mazito ya Mbunge Wilfred Kajeke wa Jimbo la Mbale, Uganda baada ya kuchoshwa na tabia ya bunge kugeuzwa muhuri wa kubariki ufisadi wa kimfumo kama ilivyo hapa kwetu.

Alijiuzulu kwa hiari baada ya kukaa bungeni kwa miaka minane na kugundua kuwa anazidi kujiumiza roho kwa kushiriki ujambazi wa kimfumo kama ilivyo hapa kwetu.

Baada ya kusoma tukio hili la kusisimua na somo kuu katika uwajibikaji na uwazi, haraka haraka majina ya mashujaa wetu wa maneno lakini woga wa vitendo kama Anne Kilango Malecela, Lucas Selelii, Fred Mpendazoe na wengine yalinijia haraka.

Nilitumia muda mrefu kufikiria kuandika makala hii kuwakumbusha wahusika kuwa, wanachofanya ni kujidhalilisha hata kama kuna watu wachache wanaoona kama ni ushujaa au ujasiri. Ujasiri si kusema bali kutenda. Wako wapi kina Kajeke wetu?

Mbunge aligundua kuwa anabeba dhambi kubwa kushiriki uharibifu na uchuuzi wa nchi yake, tena akiwa amekalia kiti cha uwakilishi wa umma. Ameona ni heri akose maulaji na ujiko kuliko kuendelea kuwa mnafiki na mtumwa wa tumbo. Ameaamua kutumia kichwa baada ya kuchoka kutumia utumbo.

Je, wabunge wetu waliotuaminisha wangekwamisha, kwa mfano, bajeti ya Mstaafa Mkulo na baadaye wakalamba matapishi yao kwa kuipitisha, wanaposoma au kusikia habari kama hizi wanajiona wa hovyo kiasi gani?

Je, wabunge wa namna hii si watumwa wa hiari? Je, hawa wanaopinga ufisadi kwa midomo na kuubariki kwa kura zao katika kupitisha miswaada si mafisadi kuliko mafisadi wenyewe ambao kimsingi hujikalia kimya ili umma uwajue wao ni nani kuliko hawa mafisadi wanaojifanya wanapinga ufisadi kwa midomo na kuubariki kwa mikono yao?

Lazima uwe moto au baridi lakini si vyote kwa wakati mmoja. Lazima uwe na mimba (fisadi) au usiwe nayo.

Hakika msimamo wa Kejeke ni somo na suto kwa wachumia tumbo wetu wanaojigeuza mbogo dhidi ya ufisadi kila uchaguzi ukaribiapo ili kuwaaminisha wananchi kuwa wanawawakilisha ili baadaye wawachague waendelee kuwabamiza mkenge.

Wamekuwa mabingwa wa kulipua mabomu yasiyoweza kuua hata nzi! Kila siku viapo na chokochoko visivyozaa matunda. Mafisadi wanaendelea kupeta huku wao wakikauka makoo kumbe lao moja.

Kama si moja basi achieni ngazi kama Kajeke. Fanyeni kweli. Tumechoka na longolongo zenu. Kama hamuwezi mnyamaze kuliko kutupigia mikelele wakati nanyi ni mafisadi.

Katika hili, Kajeke ana ushauri: “Either to join the system and fully participate in the looting or say enough is enough. I have chosen the latter and I am leaving.”

Tafsiri: “Ama kujiunga na mfumo (serikali) na kushiriki ujambazi au kusema imetosha. Nimechagua la pili na naondoka.”

Kama mamlaka uliyo nayo hayakusaidii kuepusha nchi yetu kutaifishwa na kina EPA, Richmond, ANBEN, TICTS, Dowans, IPTL na wengine, basi wewe ni mtumwa na roho yako inakusutu. Kuendelea kukaa bungeni ni utumwa wa hiari kwa ajili ya kutumikia tumbo lako. Unahitaji ukombozi kwa kuacha kuchaguliwa ili kina Kajeke waje wawakomboe wananchi baada ya kujikomboa wao.

Je, tunao kina Kajeke wangapi Tanzania? Huwa nashangaa mantiki hata ya wabunge wa upinzani kuondoa shilingi ili bajeti ikwame na rais avunje Bunge kama kisemavyo kifungu cha Katiba cha 90 (2) (b), ambacho Spika wa Bunge, Samuel Sitta, alikitumia hivi karibuni kuwanyamazisha na kupitisha bajeti ambayo kimsingi ni ya maangamizi kwa wale wanaodai kuwawakilisha.

Hapa ndipo ukweli kuwa unaweza kumuamini yeyote lakini si mwanasiasa unajidhihiri. Ingawa tumekuwa tukiwasifu wabunge tunaowaita machachari, ukweli ni kwamba umachachari wao kama hauwezi kuiadabisha serikali ikaacha kutuibia ni sawa na umachachari wa kibonzo au katuni. Hawa wabunge ni sawa na simba wa karatasi asiyeweza hata kumpoka nzi.

Tumalizie kwa maneno ya Kajeke. “Don't let the people of Uganda down. If you do, one day you will encounter them at your gate or on the streets of Kampala, demanding for their share.”

Tafsiri: “Msiwaangushe wananchi wa Uganda. Mkifanya hivyo, siku moja mtapambana nao kwenye geti au mitaani Kampala wakitaka shea yao.”

Nanyi wabunge wetu wapenda sifa na kulipua mabomu, msiwaangushe wananchi wa Tanzania. Kuna siku usaliti huu utawatokea puani. Kwani wamevumilia vya kutosha na sasa wamechoka.
Chanzo: Tanzania Daima Julai 22, 2009.

Kijiwe chaandaa nishani ya ufisadi kumtuza Njaa Kaya

KWANZA Kijiwe kinaomba msamaha. Ilipita miezi mingi bila kuwasikia akina Mgosi Machungi, Mzee Kidevu, Mbwa Mwitu, Mpemba, Kapende na Mzee Maneno pamoja na wengine bila kumsahau Makengeza au Kenge kwa ufupi.

Tunaye mwanakijiwe mpya Mipawa wa Pawa. Tulikuwa na udhuru mkubwa hasa kushiriki chaguzi kule Biharamulo na Busanda ambapo lafu ilichezwa sina mfano.

Baada ya kuachana na mambo ya siasa, sasa Kijiwe kimerejea kwenye shughuli za kawaida. Kumbuka hiki si kama kile cha Idodomya ambapo kutishana na kuapizana kukwamishiana bajeti ni maigizo ya kawaida.

Sisi tunafanya shughuli za kijiwe vilivyo. Hatupayuki ili wanakijiwe watuchague tuwabamize tena mkenge kama jamaa zetu wa Idodomya ambao, kama vyura, kila mmoja anahanikiza utadhani anawapenda walevi wakati anawaponda! Sisi tunawakilisha wanakijiwe na si matumbo yetu.

Nikiwa nimejiinamia nikimsaka mtu wa kubomu lau nyumbani watoto waende nonihino, mara Mpemba anatuamkua “Assalaam alaykum jamia.”

Muuza kahawa anakuwa wa kwanza kuitikia “Walikuwa waislamu.”

Inaonekana Mpemba ana jambo linamhini. Kwani hata utani wa muuza kahawa hausikii. Anaanza hata bila kungoja kuulizwa ni yaje.

“Mmesikia hawa walafu na mafisadi eti wasema mafuta si saala la muungano? Sie Pemba twaangalia tu. Mbona wao walitumia karafuu yetu kujenga Unguja hatusemi? Sasa washikilia mafuta hata yasovumbuliwa."

Kabla hata ya Mpemba kujibiwa, mara Mgosi Machungi anaingia na gazeti la “Waambie”. Anatusomea habari. “ rofesa Ibueim Ipumba amuipua Njaa Kaya Kikwekwe na kusema ndiye baba wa ufisadi wa EPA na Richmond.”

Kapende anadandia mic. Anasema, “Hii si habari mpya. Sema kwa vile aliyemtaja msanii ni mzito wa chama. Je, walevi watastuka na kumshikisha adabu? Hata kunguru wanajua Njaa Kaya, nkewe na genge lake walivyo EPA na Richmonduli.”

Anakohoa na kubwia kahawa yake kidogo na kuendelea. “Mna habari Njaa Kaya alidhani anaweza kuukimbia ukweli kwa kumtoa kafara Mzee wa Richmonduli Ewassa.”

Mzee Maneno anakwanyua mic. “Ushuzi siku zote huwezi kuuficha kwa kujitia marashi. Inzi lazima watakufuata kama ambavyo Njaa Kaya hataukimbia ukweli. Kila mtu anajua alivyotumia pesa ya EPA na Richmond kutoa takrima na kuibuka kwa ushindi wa Tsunami unaogeuka kuwa Tsunami kweli.”

Mgosi Machungi anadakia. “Ajabu bado anatiaminisha timchague aibe tena. Kama kipindi cha kwanza ametiibia hivi hiyo lala saama itakuwaje; si atatiibia hata wake zetu jamani.”

Mipawa hajivungi; anajibu haraka. “Awaibe mara ngapi? Hamuoni, kama Tunituni na Anna Tamaa, anavyowatumia wake zetu chini ya NGO, lake wizi mtupu? Wake zetu wameishaibiwa taka usitake.”

Mbwa Mwitu anachomekea haraka haraka. “Kuiba au kutowaiba wake zetu mimi haliniangaishi. Kinachonihangaisha ni kuiba mstakabali wa taifa.” Wakati akisema haya Mgosi Machungi anamkata jicho na kusema. “Ina maana wewe huna uchungu na mkeo!”

Mbwa anajibu kwa utani. “Nina uchungu hasa na mkeo.”

Machungi anatahadhalisha. “Mbwa angaia maneno yako. Tinaweza kutoana macho wenyewe kwa wenyewe. Kama una uchungu wa kuipiza kisasa si uende unchukue mke wa Njaa Kaya anayetumia wake zetu ili nae aone uchungu?”

“Loo! Mbwa Mwitu ndiyo unazidi kulikoroga kabisa, eti anawatumia wake zetu!” Anachomekea Makengeza.

“Anatutumia wote. Huko nyuma haikuwa hivyo. Je tumelogwa kiasi cha kujirahisi na kuendelea kuchezewa kuliko huko nyuma.” Alidakia Mchunguliaji aliyekuwa akichungulia vichwa vya habari.

Mara Kapende anadaka mic. "Jamani wabongo kwa matusi sina hamu. Huko nyuma na kuchezewa maana yake nini?" Wakati huo Mzee Maneno ndiyo alikuwa anamalizia kipisi chake cha sigara kali.

Abusu mic. "Njaa Kaya kweli anatuchezea na kujichezea mwenyewe. Maana anafanya mambo kana kwamba hakuna kesho. Nasikia anaumwa ugonjwa wa moyo kutokana na kutaa taa akitafuta jinsi ya kulizima jinamizi la EPA na Richmond. Kwani hata alipomtoa kafara rafiki yake Ewassa bado zimwi linamuandama vilivyo."

Kabla ya kuendelea, Mzee Kidevu anamwingilia na kusema. "Nasikia kweli jamaa anaumwa. Maana akina Kagoda wametishia kumfichua kama atawafichua au kuwafikisha mahakamani. Hivyo anaomba Mungu uchaguzi ufike mwakani apete na ahomole na kukitoa akingojea majaliwa yake kutokana na atakayemrithi."

Machungi anatia timu tena. "Kuna kipindi tinapaswa tijilaumu wenyewe kwa kuendeea kugeuzwa mazuzu. Kwanini tisiandamane hadi ikuu kumwambia akitoe wenye akili wationgoze?"

Mpemba hajivungi. Anakwanyua mic. "Yakhe Ngosi, mie naunga nkono mawazo yako. Kutonkabili Njaa Kaya kwamfanya aone wote wakeze ati. Jamaa ana roho ya paka yule. Hata useme vipi yeye anyamaa na kuendelea vuruga mambo. Umeona alivonywea kwenye sakata la mahakama ya kadhi na chochoko choko cha kujiunga na OIC?"

Anatwaa kombe na kulibusu kidogo na kuendelea. "Sasa kila kitu afanya huyu wa Kupinda ambaye naye apindisha mambo ati. Wajua huyu bwana njinga sana? Wakumbuka alivontetea Nkapa eti si fisadi, ni ncha Mungu wakati jizi na familia yake?"

"Yakhe mwache huyu jamaa. Nilikuwa namheshimu sana. Lakini baada ya kujigeuza dodoki la fisadi Tunituni nimemponda kuliko hata kuku na Njaa Kaya. Sikujua jamaa angetumiwa kufanya uchafu kama huu. Tusilaumu sana. Tunatawaliwa na mafisi na mafisadi." Anachomekea Mbwa Mwitu.

Mzee Mzima naona kama mada itaisha bila kukamua. Naamua kuvamia uga ili nisije nikafulia. "Wazee tuambizane ukweli. Njaa Kaya anapoteza muda. Hata Tunituni alipoonywa kuhusu ufisadi hasa wa mkewe alijigeuza mbogo. Njaa Kaya ameamua kutumia njia ya kunyamaza akidhani atapona. Kila lililo na mwanzo sharti liwe na mwisho."

Nakatua kashata na kuendelea. "Jamaa kaishiwa hakuna mfano. Siku hizi gazeti lake la umbea la Daily Wizi linaonyesha video ya safari yake kwa Obama. Ajabu wanaandika upuuzi eti Obama alimsifia kuwa kiongozi wa kuigwa barani wakati yu habithi!

Kama alimsifia kwanini aliamua kumpiga kibuti na kufanya ziara nchini Ghana badala ya Bongolala? Alijua jamaa lilivyo sanii na fisadi. Wataendelea kuwadanganya wajinga wenzao lakini si kijiwe chetu. Mie naona tungeandaa nishani ya usaliti na ufisadi tumpe Njaa Kaya ajue sisi si wa kuchezea. Nishani ya pili tumpe nkewe na ya tatu tumpe Tunituni na Anatamaa. Mnasemaje wazee?"

Wanakijiwe wanalipuka kwa vicheko na vigelegele huku makelele yakihanikiza kiasi cha kuwavuta wapita njia ambao wanasimama kwa mshangao na mshawawasha. Si mnawajua wadanganyika kwa kupenda kushangaa.

Mie sijali naendelea. "Aibu kuwa na sanii kwenye patakatifu pa patakatifu. Mnaona aibu aliyotuletea kwa kumuunga mkono habithi Humer Shari wa Sudan? Jitu limenyonga watu wake nasi tunaliunga mkono lisikamatwe na mahakama ya kimataifa ya jinai. Mnafahamu yule mwendesha mashitaka wa ICC, Luis Moreno Ocampo tulisoma naye ughaibuni?"

Wanakijiwe wanaonyesha mshangao. Wanajua hizi ni kamba za mzee mzima. Ila ukweli ni kwamba Ocampo ni rafiki yangu na kuna siku nitamkaribisha kuwakamata wauaji wa kwenye migodi kule Musoma wanaoua watu kwa kuchafua mazingira.

Mara Mgosi Machungi anachomekea. "Hata Njaa Kaya na kundi lake wanapaswa kufikishwa Uhoanzi kujibu tuhuma za kuua wadanganyika kutokana na ufisadi wake. Nao wanafanya mauaji ya haaiki kwa kutumia umaskini badala ya bunduki."

Tom anaingilia kati. "You are right Mgosi. Una habari kama kosa la kuuibia umma litatafakariwa vizuri akina Njaa Kaya ni wauaji sawa na wale wanaofanya genocide nchini Sudan? Normally ufisadi huzaa upendeleo na chuki miongoni mwa wanajamii kiasi cha kusababisha umwagaji damu. Tunaelekea huko ingawa wezi wetu hawataki kukubali.

Hebu nieleze. Bunge letu lina maana gani iwapo bajeti za kipumbavu kama ile ya Mstaafu Mkulu inapita huku pesa nyingi ikiibiwa kwenye bajeti iliyopita? Actually, we need to.."

Kabla ya kuendelea mzee Kidevu anaamua kuvamia uga kumtahadharisha Tom apunguze umombo.

Anasema. "Msomi taratibu. Unatuaacha nyuma. Angalia lugha msomi."

Kabla ya Tom kuendelea, naona vimbelembele wawili wakiwa kwenye magwanda yao wakijongelea kijiwe kutokana na zile shamra shamra za kutaka kutoa nishani. Kila mmoja anajikata kisilesi na kumwacha muuza kahawa akitaataa na vyombo vyake tayari naye kutimka.

Tuonane wiki ijayo inshallah.
Chanzo: Tanzania Daima Julai 22, 2009.

Omar Bashir Indictment: AU has Betrayed Africa

Bashir: Peacemaker or troublemaker? Photo courtesy

It is disgusting and appalling that African rulers congregating in Sirte (Libya) vowed to stand by Sudanese President, Omar Bashir. African rulers have once again proved to be hypocrites and indifferent altogether as far as human rights are concerned. Sadly, Rwandan strongman, Paul Kagame who claims to have stopped the genocide in Rwanda, too, concurred with this megalomania whilst his country suffered the same genocide as Darfur. It's unfortunate. Africa did not learn from what transpired in Rwanda.

Again, looking at how genocide was committed in Rwanda, who knows? Maybe Kagame has smelt a rat before ICC knocks on the door. The Swahili have a saying that when you see your colleague being shaved without water, rinse your head. African rulers wrongly think ICC is there to foster colonialism and interfere in their affairs thanks to taking on one of theirs. This does not help AU. And if reality is openly faced, chances are, African rulers were manipulated by the current chair of AU, Libyan Muammar Gadaffi.

If Bashir did not commit genocide in Darfur, why is he afraid of facing the ICC? Given that genocide was committed under his watch and order, Bashir can do anything but not to appear before the tribunal. This reminds me of one cartoon showing him driving over thousands of human skulls but still asking: do you have any evidence to prove that my Janjaweeds committed genocide in Darfur?

In its vague bagatelle, AU averred, "The AU member states shall not co-operate... relating to immunities for the arrest and surrender of Sudanese President Omar al-Bashir to the ICC." This betrayal was applauded and received by Sudan as a breakthrough in getting away with genocide Sudan committed to Darfur.

When AU, then OAU, was founded, its aim among others was to unify and ultimately emancipate African countries from the yoke of colonialism and all sorts of humiliation, degradation and inhumanity. But as days go by, AU has proved to be the opposite thanks to Africa being ruled by dictators, thieves and killers. Ironically, black colonialists are on the helm. AU's goals have changed from fighting colonialism to defending it as its members are homegrown colonialists.

One would expect AU to issue a statement with regards to what is going on in Gabon where the son of the former tyrant is bracing himself to replace his father. AU is expected to chart the way for Zimbabwe whose prime minister, Morgan Tsvangirai, recently came back with empty hands after western countries failed to live up to their promise of rebuilding Zimbabwe after embracing the government of national unity.

Many African countries have betrayed Darfur as it bleeds to death. They are adding more insults to injuries by ganging up with Bashir. With such nugatory stance, AU has proved to be a gang of dictators in power as far as emancipation and unification of Africa are concerned. It's totally failed to solve crises in Darfur, Somalia and Zimbabwe. Though noises are made on unification of Africa, looking at how our potentates behave, this is a day dream if AU can conspire with and connive crimes like genocide in Darfur.

AU should have shut up and put up rather than taking side. This won't help begging Africa so to speak. Of all African countries, Botswana and Kenya did the right thing by not consenting to this betrayal and shame. In law, the perpetrator of any offence is criminal and liable as the conspirator. Since genocide in Darfur has all blessings of AU, the AU must be held responsible for it. Even its bagatelle was passed without voting.

Donor countries that strongly support ICC must suspend their aids to all African countries that shamelessly support this perilous stance that butchers its own people it is duty bound to protect. African countries that signed the instrument establishing ICC must be reminded of their obligations.

Despite the fact that African rulers allege that ICC is interfering in their affairs, no sane mind can consent to this. The so-called 'their affairs' ICC is alleged to interfere with are the same that caused genocide in Rwanda. Why do African rulers forget easily? Under Idi Amin, Uganda suffered a lot thanks to the same pretext of not interfering in the affairs of the country. It also happened in Zimbabwe as Robert Mugabe sent the country to purgatory as the same AU stood by him.

AU can wrongly assure itself that it will save and protect Bashir but history will one day persecute him. He has been given visas to travel in the continent without any hitch and fear but time will come when some countries will see the light and take on him as it happened in Liberia. By fully or partially supporting Bashir, indeed, AU has proved how awkward it is.
Source: The African Executive Magazine July 15, 2009

Tunituni na Chekacheka wasameheni waishiwa

Nillinyaka juzi kuwa jamaa wa kupinda kawafunga walevi kamba eti mgodi wa makaa ya mawe wa Kiwila utatwaliwa na kurejeshwa serikalini. Kwa juu, hii ni habari njema. Lakini ukiangalia tabia ya longolongo na sanaa za jamaa yangu Chekacheka, unhhh, unapata wasi wasi kama kweli wa kupinda anajua anachosema bila kupindisha.

Nao waishiwa, baada ya kulazimishwa kupitisha upuuzi, sorry, bageti ya Mstaafu Mkulu kwa kutumia katiba viraka, nao wamejitutumua! Wanataka kumjadili Tunituni kabla ya kunyang’anywa mgodi. Mlikuwa wapi muda wote huu?

Kusema ukweli, mimi na Chekacheka tusingetaka Tunituni ajadiliwe wala kuchunguzwa. Tunataka tuchukue mgodi ili kufunika kombe wanaharamu wapete. Waishiwa wakitaka tumjadili tutaumbuka wengi. Kwanza, Chekacheka alishasema atamkingia kifua hadi anang’atuka baada naye kunyakua atakochoridhia. Si unajua tena kaya ya ulaji na Bongolala.

Kwa vile waishiwa hata Chekacheka wanakabiliwa na kiminyo mwakani kwenye uchafuzi mwakani, kila mtu ajitutumue ili asikike. Sisi, tumeamua kurejesha mgodi kwanza, ili kumuepusha jamaa yetu Tunituni kwenda lupango kama jamaa yetu pale Zambia. Pili ni kutaka kupata kura za walevi. Maana ukifika wakati wa kampeni hili litageuka dili na sera. Si unajua tena mambo ya kuusaka ulaji wa dezo.

Hakuna haja ya kumchambua Tunituni kama karanga. Kwanza ni mtu safi anayemcha Mungu kweli kweli. Ila kumbukeni. Wacha Mungu tuko wengi. Mie namcha Mungu pesa; wengine Mungu madaraka na wengine Mungu sifa mradi kila mtu ni mcha Mungu. Hata yule jamaa yangu wa Richmonduli ni mcha Mungu kwelikweli. Amewahi kwenda hata Yerusalimu kuhiji baada ya kuona kuwa Mungu wake wa tamaa halipi. Hivyo aliamua kumrejea Mungu wa Israeli.

Kwa walevi wasiojua ulaji unavyolewesha, wanadhani Tunituni alikosea kukwapua alichokwapua. Hivi ulitegemea nini na angefanya nini wakati Bi. Mkubwa, kama alivyo wa Chekacheka, alikuwa akimweka majaribuni kila siku ukiachia mbali shemeji zake.
Kwanza angeogopa nini iwapo na geshi nalo alilipa ulaji tena unaomeremeta kama dhahabu na almasi? Kimsingi, Tunituni, kama Charles Ponzi na Bernard Madoff, ataacha legacy ya upatu. Wakati wachezesha upate wenzake walichukua pesa ya wateja wao, Tunituni alichukua mali za walevi wake.

Ingawa hayajawakuta, hali inavyokwenda, msishangae ya Tunituni mkaona ya Chekacheka. Heri ya Tunituni mvua tano za kwanza alifanya kweli kuliko Chekacheka aliyeshindwa kabla hata ya kuanza kuwatumikia walevi ambao aliamua kuwatumia badala ya kuwatumikia.

Nawaonea huruma waishiwa. Hivi wao wana udhu gani wa kumjadili Tunituni iwapo wamepitisha bageti ya makufuru na matusi? Kama kuna wa kumjadili Tunituni basi si wengine ni wale waheshimiwa wa upinzani lakini si waishiwa wa nambari ziro. Kwanza jamaa hawa ni wanafiki na woga. Juzi niliandika ukurusa mzima kuwasifia kwa kukamia kukwamisha bajeti ya Mkulu halafu wakaipitisha kwa kishindo cha Tsunami! Hawa hawafai na hawana hata maana.

Kwanza nawahurumia. Sijui kama wengi watarudi kutokana rekodi yao ya kupenda kukaa Bongo wakifanya umachinga badala ya kwenda kwenye majimbo kuwahudumia walevi. Wapo ambao wamepata nishani za ububu. Yaani jitu linalipwa mshahara na marupurupu mazito tena linatembelea shangingi halafu linakwenda bungeni kufanya ushangingi!
Nilishangaa kuona mmoja wa mabubu haya anajitutumua kuwataja nyangumi baada ya kumfichua kuwa yeye ni papa. Kwa maslahi ya waliompa kula hana muda wala maneno ya kusema. Ila kwa maslahi yake na Kagoda anachonga kama kasuku! Je huyu naye anapaswa kurudi jamani hata kama anawahonga wapenda nyama nyama?

Hakuna watu nina usongo nao kama wale mawaziri wanaojifanya uwaziri ni mali ya kurithi kiasi cha kuwadharau waishiwa. Hata kama ni waishiwa,si wameishiwa wenyewe lakini si wale waliowatuma. Hivyo, tutaona. Kama kuna watu wenye hati milki za uwaziri tutajua. Hata uwe shemeji yake bosi au mshirika wake, bado si dili kuwadharau waishiwa waliotumwa na walevi wawakilishe shida zao. Ajabu tena bila aibu, wengine walifikia hata kufuru ya kutetea mapapa wakijua kufanya hivyo ni kuwahujumu na kuwasaliti walevi. Hata kama ni walevi jamani watendeeni haki. Kwani hamjasikia? Mnyonge mnyongeni lakini haki yake mpeni. Kuna kesho.

Turejee kwa Tunituni na Chekacheka na jamaa yetu wa kupinda. Tumeamua kurejesha huo mgodi ili kuepusha kuwasweka rumande jamaa zake hasa Bi Nkubwa na watoto. Baada ya kuona yaliyomfika first lady Regina Chiluba pale Zambia, washauri wetu wametwambia: tukiendelea kulaza damu Anna Tamaa Tunituni na vitegemezi, na vivyele vyake wanaweza kujikuta wakinoniho kwenye debe kule Ukonga alikowahi kusota mshikaji wake wa zamani Pesatatu.

Hivyo kuwaokoa hawa, ni kuchukua godi bila kutoa maelezo kibao ili kuepuka kuwapa wambea faida. Pia kufanya hivi ni kuepusha jamaa zetu kudaiwa fidia kwa muda waliolikamua godi.
Pia tunazuia waishiwa wa nambari ziro kujadili suala hili ambalo baadaye watalipitisha kama bajeti, ili kuepusha kuwapa nafasi wale waheshimiwa wa upingaji kuzidi kutuanika na kustukia madili yetu mengine.

Pamoja na yote, tumeona kuepusha lawama, tumpe wa kupinda alipue bomu. Maana yeye kwa cheo chake cha uwaziri mkubwa anateuliwa si kuchaguliwa kama sisi. Hivyo jamaa lazima afanye kazi ya kusafisha uoza wetu ili walevi watuamini na baadaye watupe kula tuwafungie mzigo kama Tunituni ngwe yetu ikiisha.

Kitu kingine, k ama waishiwa wangekuwa wanawawakilisha walevi kweli na si matumbo yao, wangekuwa na kila sababu ya kumjadili Tunituni. Wengekuwa safi wangefanya hivyo bila shaka. Pia kiama chetu hakiwezi kuruhusu mchezo huu kwa kujichoma kisu mwenyewe ikizingatiwa kuwa ukiruhusu mjadala watakaoumilki ni wapingaji wetu. Hata hivyo kwa mujibu wa sera zetu za chukua chako mapema, Tunituni ni shujaa wa kupigiwa mfano. Ndiyo maana wa kupinda aliamua kummwangia ujiko kibao. Ni muadilifu kuliko Tunituni na waishiwa waliopitisha libajeti lisilo na maana kwa walevi.
Naona simu ya Tunituni. Acha nikaijibu haraka.

Vote for me come next elections

My name is Fisadi son of Mbangaizaji. We’re having general elections next year, I better to start campaigning even if the electoral commission hasn’t declared it yet.

Given this is the season for ulaji through ballot box, I’m prepared to serve you. Though I deserve no honour, I still want to be referred to as honorable Fisadi. No way. I can’t let this chance slip by.

I’ve already put strategies in place. Firstly, I’ve already acquired seven college degrees from Commonwealth Nonexistent University , Hazard, and Eden-bug, Open University of the World (OUW), New York and Kuchonga University Bangarole, India .

I also have already talked to Gabacholi and Arab tycoons to sponsor my campaigns so that after I become an MP I see to it they invest in Bongolala. Given that I’m going to become a law maker, I’ll see to it that we enact favourable laws for them to be able to do capital flight business comfortably.

To begin with, I’ll donate money to youth and women clubs and some schools in my constituency.

My Dubai based Arab friend will pour money like crazy to bribe all members of select committee at the tune of 500,000/- per head.i ‘m sure they’ll swallow the bait without any question.

Nonetheless, I was not mentioned in EPA and Richmond Deep Green Finance, Meremeta,, Kagoda and other vampiric scams, I got some cut from them. Don’t tell anybody and when you read this make sure you do it silently. My cut will be employed on bribing sippers and their wives who like free clothes like Khangas, T-shirts, BBQ and other nonsense. Mind you. I’m neither a shark nor a whale though a fisadi.

I’ve already gotten some Kanjanjas that will decorate my name in their newspapers. My slogan is: hither comes God-chosen saviour that will deliver sippers to Canaan in the country of barbeque and wine.

I’m a smart guy. Despite spending centuries without entering God’s buildings, I’ve already teamed up with some churches and mosques that will drum and trumpet my name Hon. Fisadi Mbangaizaji PhD Phil, MA in lies and hypothetical thinking, BSc. Umbea, Dip in Corruption and mafia, Dip. (Mass mobilization), MBA (Masters in Money making), etc, MP for Tumboni Ulaji.

See. All my degrees need a genius especially MA in Lies and Hypocritical Thinking. Only a few fellas have acquired it. Those are, Ben Makapu and Joe Makamba. When it comes to Africa we’re a few including Bob Mugabe, Jack Zuma, Yoweri M7, and Moi Kibaki.

You know what? My strategies are bigger than a mountain. My slogan is new zeal, new love (Zero) and new big things. Surely, sippers will believe in my make-believe stuffs by voting for me for their peril.

To begin with, I’ll start sharing kanywaji with them. I’ll great them by mentioning their names as I embrace each of them to prove I love them.

I’ll also make sure my VX becomes sipper’s town bus. It’ll take them wherever they like.

My memsahib will form an NGO for the defence of their wives. She’ll fight to see to it that men do home chores such as floor mopping, nail doing and washing babies without forgetting to wear skirts.

So too, I’ll form Mbangaizaji Anthropological Society of Thoughts (MAST) to defend all creatures including sharks and whales without forgetting albinos and elderly.

I’ll raise money for supporting students and patients in the constituency. Hither, I’ll buy 500 mosquito nets and 200 desks to support uswekeni primary school and dispensary.

What’s more, I’ll buy some balls and uniforms of which I’ll wear one as I play soccer with the youths I used to fear like HIV.

During this match, my ten thousand buck Rolex will be left home to avoid being snatched by these man-made petty robbers.

I’ve already fixed the tribal elders. I’ll bribe their head. Wonder not when you see me in traditional regalia signifying being an elder of the tribe and a District Youth Commander of the party.

My mistress Hawara d/o Nyumbandogo with who I’ve a boy will be bribed so that she keeps mum. That bastard I disowned will secretly become my darling baby.

To nicely corner her, I’ll find an international school for her son. This will convince her that I’m preparing him for becoming a leader in future. I’ll promise her to send her son to London for advanced studies. Stupid farmers will be promised good price for their produce. I’ll loan a page from Mizengwe Pindu.

Like him, I’ll promise a tractor and hallow for every village. So too, I’ll promise clean and safe water. Hither is where my Dubai Arab comes in. To make off with their votes, I’ll invite students from Water Resource College to survey the whole projects.

Another strategy is defending the chair of our party for whatever nonsense he commits. To convince him, I’ve already threatened to sue whoever opposes him. In so doing, I tremble like a Maasai morani when offended. I swear by all gods real and fake.

Though many will think this is daydreaming, I’ll make it to the Bunge. Firstly, I’m beautiful like Njaa Kaya. And I’m just a boy of 65 years old who smiles even at funeral.

So too, I’m God-chosen. Thirdly I command sweet language on top of being a good perfomer. Fifth, I’m the man of the people. Don’t ask if there’s a man of hyenas.

Sixth, I’ve brought peace in people’s pockets in the constituency.

For more strategies, let’s meet next time.

So long from Uswekeni.

Charade Bailout Tanzania Style!

When the US government discovered big holes in its ailing economy (thanks to underworld business by greedy corporates) it invented bailout. Economists still fiercely differ on this. On the one hand there are those that take it as a smart move aimed at keeping the people in the main street afloat. On the other hand there are those that look at bailout as sinking tax payer’s money to the hole. When one looks at the reasons they offer, they all seem to be right.

But again, logically, one thing makes sense. First of all, the US and other affluent countries have enough financial muscles to take on this. Secondly, the manner in which the bailout is conducted in some areas convinces: there can be romp in soon thanks to the signs the US economy is currently showing. Thirdly US caused this calamity to the rest of the world. Thus it deserves to do something about it even at the world level. Fourthly, greed and selfishness being the engines of capitalism as well as the bombs (as of now), there was no way the US would sit idly by and evidence its children dying of the disease it cultivated. It had to reap the benefits of its system as well as stand by when things go wrong.

So the first thing to do was to take on greedy CEOs who offered credit generously knowingly this irresponsibility would backfire. Their gargantuan emoluments like golden parachutes, salaries and the likes were practically abolished or slashed. To make sure that these crooks do nary get away with it, the government purchases some shares in affected firms so as to ultimately-for some-own them.

Currently AIG and General Motors or Government Motors as it is joked, are under government watch as it becomes the holder of majority shareholder of the restructured company, with 60% of the stock. To make sure the crime is not repeated, White House receives briefings on economy almost everyday among which is the state of the bill of health of bailed out firms. This way, the government is doing business to see to it that taxpayer’s money is not swindled.

Recently, Tanzania ’s government blatantly proposed bailout measures to her all-time-sick economy. This move sounds smart. Nonetheless, it’s already been seen as charade aimed at stealing taxpayer’s money. With rampancy of stinking corruption in the upper echelons of power, one can comfortably predict its end- it’ll end up a cropper as it morosely digs more menacing holes on the already moth-holed economy.

One thing to remember, this is the same government that stupidly nationalized almost everything especially profit-making gung-hos Nyerere found after felling them and proving to be shoddy as far as business is concerned. Sadly by relegating back to business, this means: privatization is a hoax or much bigger mess should be xpected.

Let me prove my point. Tanzania secured a loan of over 1/-tn to bail out her economy. Amazingly, this amount is a debt whose interest rate is 11%. The good government in Dar es Salaam is planning to loan the same to some unspecified companies at the interest of 2%! Reasoning and reality have been given a heave-ho of a sort! Who will pay generously forgiven 9%? Monkey business of course!

If this megalomania is not stopped, Tanzania's economy will be ruined even more under the pretext of bailing it out. How should it stop crumbling if loans are sought to be abused as the case in point? Renowned economist Professor Ibrahim Lipumba and opposition MPs queried this and termed it as flapdoodle that needs a courage and heart of the mad to commit. He said, “I am getting some feelings that this plan is going to be like a crash programme. Normally crash programmes are implemented without adequate preparations.” Lipumba added, “I listened to President Kikwete’s address …. and also read the speech budget. I could not find anywhere where an ordinary farmer is mentioned as far as the stimulus package is concerned.”

Despite warnings from experts, as usual, like a wise monkey that sees, hears and does nothing, Dar is still hell bent to go on with this buffoonery! Before thinking about bailout, it would have been wise to tackle the root cause-graft and lack of fiscal discipline and vision. The same government that’s chest beating is sitting on mega million scandals! Without combating graft, poor and begging countries will be attempting suttee in the name of bailout. For, in the end, the money aimed at bailing economy out will bail out thieves and crooks in power.

For long, Africa ’s economies were marginalized from the rest of the world so as to be nicely exploited. The prices of our produce have been low and there have nary been equal terms in the so-called international trade since in flag independence. Our countries are run by straight-jacket policies tailored abroad and supervised by puppets not to mention strings attached to the prescription vending international agencies such as World Bank and IMF.

What’s more, African economies still largely depend on those of rich countries on top of our governments’ lack of vision and mission. Though this dependence is superficial, it affects them verily. Africa still spends much needed money on unnecessary military undertakings. If African rulers that make us believe: they mean to save our economies were sincere, the first right thing to do would have been to dwindle the size of their armies and governments.

Another sensible thing to do would be embarking on narrow-and-straight fiscal policies. Instead of depending on and loaning from WB and IMF, African experts in this area should be consulted and their expertise be heed and exploited. Will the West allow this? To avoid going on being caught in their nests, Africa needs to embark on home made policies based on African culture, values and aspirations-self respect and abhorring dependence.

What does this mean? Africa is an unregulated free market for the world. Many substandard goods enter Africa everyday. Many unnecessary items such as expensive oil guzzlers are preferred by African crooks in power. Africa’s agricultural sector is forgotten. Efforts are directed towards vending and trading left resources at throw-away prices that makes sense only to ten-percent-charging thieves in power. This forces Africa to import.

In other countries, IMF-WB’s policies have ruined the countries so as to depend on donors even on food. Without feeding oneself, one can not forge ahead. To do away from current economic crises and poverty Africa needs to think about feeding herself as the step towards fully emancipation. Without doing this, all is good for nothing. In such a debacle can we make it without planning and manning ourselves really? The recipe number one to thwart this is tackling graft at all levels and by all means.

Moreover, our good-at-aping rulers tell us: bailout is an in-thing for the rejuvenation of the economy, thanks to American invention. America did not award money to greedy CEOs or dish out money to the loss making companies. Instead it bought stakes in these companies and put them under government watch to see to it that taxpayer’s money is returned. Indeed, wherever there is a clean and sensible government, this is the surest way of combating embezzlement and corruption even aiding economy to recover.

In a nutshell, bailout African style will ruin our ICU-based economies. We need good governance and empowerment of our people in place and responsible governments accountable to their people. Economic crimes especially involving embezzlement of public money should be categorized as crimes against humanity. Otherwise, this charade we saw aimed at economic bailout is yet havoc to the continent.
Source: The African Magazine July 1, 2009.

Pinda, unataka kumdanganya nani?

Nafahamu waziri mkuu Mizengo Pinda ni mwanasheria. Matamshi yake hivi karibuni kwa bunge kuwa atachukua mgodi wa makaa ya mawe wa Kiwira toka mikononi mwa rais mstaafu Benjamin Mkapa, familia yake na marafiki zake yana utata kisheria.

Yanaonekana kuwa ya kisiasa zaidi ya kisheria. Alikaririwa akisema, "Mimi nilichoamua... kama issue ya Kiwira ndio kitu kikubwa, nitahakikisha zile hisa zote zinarudi serikalini, zote,"

Aliendelea, "Nitachukua zote nitazirudisha serikalini tuanze upya ili tuone kuwa hiki tulichoanza nacho, pengine kitatupa tija tunayohitaji." Je hapa Pinda anaamua kama Pinda haoni kama anatoa mwanya kwa akina Mkapa kumshitaki na hatimaye kurejeshwa mgodi na kudai fidia? Anashindwa nini kusema serikali imeamua kama kweli ana nia nzuri ya kuurejesha mgodi huu? Je hajui kama ataamua kama waziri mkuu, kuna bosi wake juu yake ambaye alishasema hana mpango wa kumchunguza Mkapa?

Je kitendo cha Pinda kutaka jinai hii iishe kishikaji si njia ya kuwanusuru wengine wasio na kinga kama Mkapa? Je huu haujawa usanii na kutuhadaa na kutugeuza majuha? Kwanini uzuie bunge kujadili suala hili halafu mtu mmoja asiye na mamlaka yoyote kikatiba ajitwishe kadhia hii kama hakuna namna?

Kinachofanya nitilie shaka mikakati ya Pinda ni kauli zake. Hebu tazama nukuu hii. "Tunapomtaja Mkapa kuwa ni fisadi, tujiulize ufisadi wake upo wapi? Ameweka mabilioni ya fedha nje ya nchi… Naamini mtu huyu ni safi na namfahamu kuwa ni mcha Mungu,"

Ufisadi tafsiri yake si kuweka pesa nyingi nje ya nchi. Ufisadi ni ile hali ya mtu kutumia nafasi yake, ushawishi au vyovyote iwavyo kuuibia umma kama alivyofanya Mkap ana wenzake.

Eti Pinda hajui ufisadi wa Mkapa? Ajabu! Yaani anaona rais kutumia madaraka yake kutwaa mali ya umma ndiyo huo ucha Mungu anaotwambia Pinda? Huwezi kumuita Yuda Iskalioti mcha Mungu kwa kumsaliti Bwana. Kama Mkapa ni mcha Mungu ni kwa Pinda si kwa watanzania ambao hadi sasa wanaishi maisha magumu kutokana na ufisadi wake. Rejea kuiba nyumba za umma na kuzigawa miongoni mwake na mwaziri wake akiwamo Pinda na bosi wake. Reja kuingia mikataba ya kijambazi ya uwekezaji kama ule wa kuleta Net Solution Group kulikofanywa na shemeji zake. Rejea kuiua na kuiuza iliyokuwa Benki ya Taifa ya Biashara (NBC). Rejea kulihujumu shirika la umeme Tanesco kwa kuingia mikataba kama IPTL. Rejea kuruhusu familia yake hasa mkewe kutumia NGO kujineemesha kwa mgongo wa ofisi ya rais bila kusahau kupata mikopo nafuu na kujitwalia mali za umma kama Kiwira.

Pinda anajikaanga mwenyewe kwa kutoa madai yaliyopinda. Anakiri kuwa Mkapa alishiriki ujambazi wa Kiwira lakini bado anamuita mcha Mungu! Inaelekea ndugu yetu hajui maana ya neno mcha Mungu.

Alikaririwa akikiri. "Tuangalie, inawezekana aliburuzwa kutokana na matatizo ya wakati ule," Kwanini mtu mwenye akili timamu na kila nyenzo ya usalama aburuzwe kama kweli hakuwa na nia ya kujineemesha kwa kutumia madaraka? Mbona Mkapa alishauriwa akawachukia waliofanya hivyo hadi kufikia hata kuwafutia uraia baadhi yao ? Huyu si mtu wa kuburuzwa bali kuburuza kama anavyotaka kutuburuza mtetezi wake Pinda.

Kuna haja ya kustukia na kupinga mbinu za Pinda, Mkapa na wenzake. Inadaiwa kuwa mgodi wa Kiwira unamilikiwa na Nick Mkapa, Foster Mkapa na B. Mahembe ambao wanamiliki kampuni ya Fosnlid wakati kampuni ya Devconsult LTD wamiliki wake ni D.Yona na Danny Yona J.R.

Makampuni mengine ambayo yaliungana na kununua mgodi huo ni Choice Industries, ya Joe Mbuna ambaye ni kivyele cha Mkapa na Goodyeer Francis na kampuni ya Universal Technologies, ambayo inamilikiwa na Willfred Malekia na Evance Mapundi. Wabia hawa ndio waliounda kampuni ya Tanpower Resources Ltd inayomiliki mgodi huo.

Je haoni kwa kunyang’anya mgodi kienyeji ni kuwaepusha wamilki wengine kufikishwa mbele ya sheria na kuwajibika? Je hasara iliyokwisababishwa na kuendelea kumilkiwa kwa mgodi huu kinyume cha sheria anaiweka upande gani? Ni vizuri Pinda akaelezwa ukweli kuwa anachofanya ni usanii na kushirikiana na wahalifu kutaka kuendelea kulihujumu taifa.

Ni vizuri Pinda na wenzake wakajua kuwa watanzania wamekomaa. Hivyo kuwafanyia usanii wa kitoto ni kuwatukana matusi ya nguoni.

Kwanini Pinda asiseme wazi kuwa ametumwa amtetee Mkapa? Ingawa anajitahidi kufanya hivyo hata kwa kuweka kiapo chake rehani, hawezi kumsafisha Mkapa. Kwanini asimwache Mkapa akajitetea hata mawakili wake? Hivi Pinda hajui kuwa analipwa na umma huo huo anaotaka kuudanganya na kuuhujumu na si Mkapa anayemtetea? Kama wanajuana na Mkapa, hili ni suala binafsi. Lisiingizwe kwenye mambo ya taifa. Mkapa si kichanga cha kutetewa na kila anayejihisi kufanya hivyo. Kuendelea kwa watawala walioko madarakani kumtetea Mkapa kunaweza kutoa ishara kuwa ima walishirikiana naye au nao wana mpango wa kufanya kama yeye watakapostaafu kisheria. Namna hii amani uchwara tunayojivunia itatoweka. Maana wananchi wamechoka kugeuzwa nepi na ngazi na kila fisi na fisadi ajae na kujihomolea.

Leo Pinda kaja na Kiwira kwa usanii ule ule. Kesho atakuja na Richmond ambayo nayo inawahusisha wakubwa wenzake bila kusahau Kagoda na EPA ambavyo vimegeuka serikali ndani ya serikali.

Hivyo basi wabunge wana haki ya kujadili jinsi ya kurejesha Kiwira na hatua za kuwachukulia wahusika. Sheria za nchi ziko wazi hasa zile za uhujumu uchumi. Hapa kinachopaswa kuangaliwa sana sana ni kinga uchwara ya rais ambayo matumizi na tafsiri yake inaanza kutumia kifisadi. Pinda, tell it to the birds. Unachofanya ni uhujumu na kulindana.
Chanzo: Tanzania Daima, Julai 1, 2009.

Mene mene Tekel u-Pharsin

JAMANI mnaosoma unabii huu mjue ni wa serikali ya kifisadi ya ndotoni ya Mtukufu Mpayukaji Msemahovyo - chaguo la Mungu. Hivyo msije mkafanya makosa mkanichukia bure, kuwa nimewakwaza mkidhani nisemayo yanaihusu serikali yenu tukufu ya KISHIPA yaani Kikwete, Shein na Pinda.

Leo, nazungumzia tulivyopitisha bajeti ‘ngwengwe’ baada ya kuwatandika bao la kisigino wabunge wa Bunge letu la ndotoni. Wengi wa wanakijiwe walikuwa wamepania kuikwamisha eti kwa sababu ni ya kujipendelea na uchaguzi wa kijiwe mwakani.

Ingawa tunawajua walivyo hovyo, tulizinyaka toka kwa mashushu wetu. Hivyo hatukufanya ajizi. Tulijiandaa kuwatia adabu hasa kwa kuwatisha kuwa kama wasingeipitisha bajeti mishahara yao licha ya kuifyeka, tusingewalipa kwa vile pasingekuwa na pesa ya kufanya hivyo.

Kutokana na ufisi, ufisadi na ubinafsi wa wabunge wetu wa kijiwe, wale viherehere wote waliokuwa wamejiaibisha kwa kuapa wangeikwamisha bajeti mbona walifyata mikia na kufakamia matapishi yao kama mbwa!

Penye udhia penyeza rupia walisema wahenga. Hii ilifanya kazi kweli kweli hasa ikizingatiwa kuwa jamaa zangu wako bungeni kujineemesha kwa kuwaongopea wanuka jasho kuwa wanawawakilisha wasijue wanawakilisha matumbo yao!

Basi, bila ajizi tulimbonyeza spika wa kijiwe, mheshimiwa Six Meno Sam awatishe wabunge. Kwa kuwa letu moja, aliamua kuwasomea katiba viraka ya kijiwe isemayo Mheshimiwa Mpayukaji anaweza kuvunja bunge la ulaji iwapo wabunge wangemkosea adabu kwa kutaka kuingilia ulaji wake.

Kifungo cha 20 (7) (c) cha katiba yetu kinasema wazi kuwa wakati wowote Mpayukaji atavunja Bunge na kuwalamba bakora wabunge hata kuwafunga watakapokataa kutia muhuri makufuru yake.

Mpayukaji ana mamlaka ya kuyatumia vibaya mamlaka (power to abuse power). Yeye ni Mungu hapa duniani awatawalaye walevi na asifanywe kitu. Yeye na nyumba yake na marafiki zake wametukuka na hawakosei hata wakikosea si kosa. Hivyo, wabunge nao kwa kujua uhovyo wao, walifyata mikia na kuanza kuisifia ili wapewa ulaji wao.

Kuonyesha tulivyo wajanja, wapo waliojipendekeza hata kutumia misahafu kutulaani kwa kukwamisha mambo. Ajabu ukiwaona kina Mbwa Mwitu ambaye tunamtania kuwa ni Mzindikakaya, wanaofanya hivyo walivyo na harufu ya ufisadi unakosa maana ya misahafu!

Hata hivyo, tusiwalaumu sana. Ni wangapi wanashika misahafu kuapa kuitumia nchi kwa kuwahadaa waliwa eti wataitumikia nchi? Hamkumsikia yule jamaa aliyepinda kwa mizengwe akisema eti Tunituni Makapi ni mcha Mungu wakati ni kibaka wa kawaida?

Siku hizi viapo havina maana kama zamani. Mtu anaweza kuapa tena mbele za watu akatenda kile alichoapa kutotenda na walevi wakaendelea kumuamini. Hamjamsikia Njaa Kaya anavyowabamiza mkenge kweupe nao wakiendelea kukalia matumaini kama waathirika?

Ni wangapi wanaapa altareni au kwa shehe kuwa watakuwa kitu kimoja katika shida na raha lakini umaskini au mabalaa yanapopiga hodi wanaachana? Ni wangapi wanavunja amri ya sita wakati wameoa au kuolewa? Nenda Idodomya ujionee.

Huu ndiyo ujanja. Unatumia misahafu kuhalalisha dhambi zako kama Belshazzar wa Nabkadnezza. Ingawa maandishi ya Mene mene Tekel u-Pharsin tayari yako ukutani. Sisi hatujali. Walevi wakija kushtuka tutakuwa tunakunja jamvi na kuwaachia mkangafu wao baada ya kurarua kama tumbusi na fisi. Tutakuwa tumeishauozesha kama inzi.

Pia ifahamike. Maandishi haya yanatulenga sote. Maana siku gharika likija hakuna atakayenusirika. Tutazamishwa wote. Kwani tumeiharibu ardhi takatifu wote. Kila mmoja ukiondoa vichaa watoto na wanyama, ana mchango katika kufuru hii.

Kaya ya walevi kwa vituko hakuna mfano duniani mna habari? Kuna watu wa majoho eti walitaka tulaaniwe kwa kuingilia ulaji wao! Mbona wao wanakula sadaka ya Bwana na hakuna anayewalaani?

Eti wengine wanasema waziri wa fedha na kuchuma aachie ngazi kwa sababu waligundua alilambishwa akasamehe kodi kwa baadhi ya sekta. Hivi wanataka ale polisi siyo? Katika nchi ya walevi kujiuzulu ni dhambi isiyosameheka na kuwajibishana ni matusi ya nguoni.

Kwanza nani amuwajibishe mwenzake iwapo wote tunanuka? Nani huyu awe wa kwanza kutupa jiwe iwapo kila mtu ana ka-ulaji wake na ka-serikali kake kama Kagoda na Richmonduli katika nchi ya Ahaha?

Tatizo ni kwamba walevi wengi hawajui serikali inavyofanya kazi. Wanashikilia kuwa tuliwaahidi kwenda Kanani. Ebo! Kanani nyinyi ni Wayahudi? Hatuwezi kufanya kosa hili. Maana tukiwapeleka kule mtaichafua nchi takatifu kiasi cha kulaanika kama nyinyi.

Hivi kuna nchi takatifu kama yenu iliyozungukwa maziwa, mito , vilima huku ikiwa imejaa vito kuliko yoyote? Hapa tuambizane ukweli. Haikulaaniwa ardhi yenu bali nyinyi na nafsi zenu.

Mlilaanika pale mlipoanza kutumia matumbo na makalio kufikiri badala ya ubongo. Mlilaanika mlipoanza kujifikiria badala ya jamii. Mlilaanika na mtalaanika kwa kuwa woga na wanafiki tena kwa nafsi na maisha yenu.

Mnataka muambiwe mara ngapi? Mbona maandishi ya Mene mene yako ukutani miaka kibao. Mnayasoma na kuyaacha pale pale? Hii inakumbusha kisa cha mbuzi. Akivamia shamba kula mahindi akirushiwa jiwe anadhani msamalia mwema kamrushia mahindi zaidi!

Hadi yamkute ndipo anatia akilini. ‘Too late’. Jilaumuni badala ya kutulaumu sisi. Yamekaa ukutani hadi yanaanza kuliwa na mchwa! Ajabu kila fala anajifanya mjuaji na kila mjuaji anageuzwa fala na bado watu wanadai mambo yako sawa!

Bwana wee, ngoja nitimke kwenda kufaidi chai na mahanjumati ya bilioni 19 za brother Mstaafu Mkulu.
Chanzo: Tanzania Daima Julai 1, 2009.

Thanks section 90 (2) (b) to pass my budget

I am dreaming of being the minister for money Mstaafu Mkulu. This is why, hereunder, I’m revisiting my budget that sailed through thanks to section 90 (b) of the one-party-made-potholed constitution of Bongolala.

I thank Lord. For my budget’s attracting many people who liked it so as to propose I take over after his Excellency finishes his performance. Let me note pointedly. The MPs that bayed to humiliate my budget were themselves humiliated.

Though those who do not know economic-and-reaping matters trashed my budget for nullifying tax exemption for NGOs by offering tax holiday to coconut oil, they missed a point. All is done in order to cope up with economic depression the world faces currently.

Now I am walking thumbs-up thanks to presenting a historic budget. Where else have you ever seen Tshs. 19/-bn set aside just for tea and yum-yum?

Our budget is crystal clear. If compared to those of other countries, one will see the rationale. In other countries, no dime is set aside for drinking water let alone tea and yum-yum. Thank me for the billions set aside for tea.

Other countries anathematized use of shangingis or oil guzzlers. Like crazy, we’ve authorized the purchase of even more so as to make our people happy. And mark my words. This boosts the name of our country internationally.

Vote for us next year. You’ll see even more wonders. We promised better life for all. Setting 19/-bn aside proves this.

Our country is a born again one. That’s why the prices of cold drink and booze are up. This aims at averting the danger of alcoholism, committing sin major one being battering your wives. Also we did this to curb obesity resulting from quaffing too much soda and other sugary stuffs.

Scientists have proved: tea is cure. We thus, by drinking much tea, cure our bodies and the pockets of our tea growers. And this will help the government to garner more tax as it enters Guinness book of wonders.

I know. Protestants will cheat you that we’ve banned soda. To the contrary, you’re allowed to drink during functions and fetes.

Regarding alcohol, rich guys and rulers will sip it on your behalf. You know what. Even if they become intoxicated, they commit no sins and if they do, God and government pardon them. For, verily, they’re the anointed and chosen ones.

Common bin-Adams will only be allowed to sip liquor during next year’s campaigns. Verily, nobody can commit any sin at this time of transfiguration when common paupers become anointed ones like their rulers.

One thing must be underscored. My budget bans small bribes during campaigns. If you intend to offer say a T-shirt, khanga or beer, remember. Instead, one must offer a suit, a crate of beer, a goat in lieu of barbeque and what have you. On the same footing, those prone of offering lift as takrima beware. You are not allowed to offer lift save on plane not shangingi.

To make sure this works, I’ve proposed there must be offered EPA, sorry, bailout money. This will bail the waishiwa out during the campaigns. And to make sure this succeeds, we are putting simple proscriptions in place in order to enable them grab this generously free money. Given we are a born-again country; we offer loans at the rate of two percent despite loaning the same at the rate of 11%.

Don’t worry about where and how the government is to seal the hole. Value Added Tax imposed on rent and other items will serve the purpose.

To make elections successful, we’re intending to increase Waishiwa’s salaries and emoluments thanks for their cooperation despite having a few hardheaded.

As for teachers, we’re going to build houses for them wherever the school is. This is a preferential treatment after one goon drubbed. Instead of buying toys for kids known as laboratory equipments, we’ve favoured teachers. And regarding sitting on stones in the class, this serves to put sense in their heads that education is not luxuries.

Some people are baffled how MPs would pass the budget they promised to foil! You know what? When such shrewdness surfaces, you just tell speaker Six to invoke section 90 (2) (b) of our potholed constitution to put sense in their little heads as it happened recently.

By the way, who could trust politicians that spend most of their time in Bongo doing private business instead of living in their constituencies? When you tell them the president can disband the parliament, they shiver like babies. Money talks.

When it comes to issuing threats, Bongoans are second to none. But when it comes to living up to their words, hell no. they end up hunching. And had they stayed put we’d have reduced their emoluments. Did they think we don’t know they’re more paid than and MPs on earth for doing nothing and sleeping in the house? To jog their minds, even in rich countries their colleagues do not have chauffeurs, guards, garden boys and what not. They don’t even get salutes from military chaps like you.

Let me wrap up by advising our brethren in cloaks. Do you know why we nullified tax exemptions you used to enjoy and other misuse like TRA to print money till the head prefect saved your skin? You’ve been accusing us of corruption little knowing without it nobody would become a politician.

Time is over, may I submit?

Give me rouse applause even if you are furious for being forced to pass the bill.
Source:Thisday June 24, 2009.

Hongera Kikwete kumteua Pita Noni

Japo watu wengi wametilia shaka uteuzi wa ‘mchapakazi’ Pita E M Noni kuwa mnene wa Benki ya Raslimali (TIB), nachukua fursa kuwapongeza wote wawili yaani mteuzi na mteule kwa kutuacha hoi. Si haba. Vitu vyao tumeviona na ujumbe umefika. Sasa mapambano dhidi ya ufisadi yameiva.

Kwanza , ikumbukwe. Noni, kwa wakubwa na maslahi yao , ni mchapakazi hakuna mfano duniani. Alisimamia vilivyo zoezi la EPA kiasi cha kutoacha mwanya wa makosa. Maana hata sanaa za kuwafikisha wahusika mahakamani, zinavyoonyesha, zitaishia kama watuhumiwa wa Richmond ambao hivi karibuni waziri wa bora utawala alisema hawawezi kuwajadili kwa vile sheria za kubuni haziruhusu. Kituko zaidi ni pale mama waziri mwenye jina la mnyama anayetisha alipoongopa eti Richmond haikupewa hata ndururu!

Pamoja na Noni kutajwa vibaya kwenye wizi wa EPA naye asikanushe, bado kwa wakubwa anafaa sana . Wengi walidhani angeingia kwenye kundi la akina Iman Mwankosya. Wamenoa. Haingii mtu mwenye connections.

Rais Jakaya Kikwete amekuwa bingwa wa kuteua watu wanaoamsha hisia na mjadala. Alianza na swahiba yake Edward Lowassa. Bahati mbaya hakudumu baada ya kuonyesha sura yake halisi. Kwa waliojua uhusiano wao na shutuma alizoziacha marehemu Mwalimu Julius Nyerere, walikuna vichwa kiasi cha kuota ukurutu walipotaarifiwa kuwa jamaa angekuwa waziri mkuu. Na kweli, mwanaharamu hata umuweke kwenye chupa atatoa kidole, hakuchelewa kufanya vitu vyake kiasi cha kutimka kabla ya wakati wake!

Uteuzi mwingine ulioamsha hisia na mijadala ni ule wa Joe Mgosi Makamba bingwa wa mipasho kuwa katibu mkubwa wa chama chake. Hadi sasa hakuna anayejua siri na sababu ya kumteua mtu tata kama huyu ambaye si haba amekijenga chama kwa njia ya ‘bomoa tutajenga kesho’. Amesababisha mijadala mingi ndani na nje ya chama. Hii ni kutokana na mipasho yake ambayo kuvuka mipaka hata kuwaudhi walengwa ni jambo la kawaida. Jamaa mwenye breki moja linapokuja suala la kupayuka.

Pia uteuzi wenye kusisimua ni ule wa aliyekuwa waziri wa miundo mbinu na mwanasheria mkuu wa zamani, Andrew Chenge. Akiwa ameboronga sana kwenye utawala kidhabu wa Benjamin Mkapa, hakuna aliyetarajia mtu yeyote mwenye uchungu na nchi, busara na uelewa wa mambo angemteua mtu kama huyu. Lakini alimteua na ukweli ukajidhihirisha baadaye alipogundulika kuwa ametutika mabilioni ya shilingi kisiwani Jersey aliyoyaita vijisenti. Hadi sasa ni ajabu ya maajabu kwa jamaa huyu kuendelea kuwa mheshimiwa huku akilalia mabilioni ya shilingi toka kwenye dili la rada.

Huo ndiyo uteuzi wa bingwa wa kuteua ambaye kwa msimamo hana tofauti na ruba aamuapo lake. Wengi, hadi leo, hawajui siri ya silka hii. Jamaa atakuchekea hata umuudhi vipi ilmradi mwisho wa siku lake linakuwa .

Uteuzi ambao unaweza kuingia kwenye kitabu cha maajabu cha Guiness ni ule wa Rweka Mka-ndala, kada maarufu wa CCM kuwa mkuu wa chuo kikuu cha Manzese. Madhira ya blanda hii wanayajua wengi hasa wanafunzi. Migomo, migongano juu ya mikopo ya elimu ndiyo usiseme.

Uteuzi mwingine ni ule wa Kingungi Ngombaru Mweru kuwa mshauri wa rais na mbunge. Jamaa kwa umri wake, kama tutamtendea haki, alipaswa kukaa nyumbani akacheze na wajukuu. Maana ukiangalia kwenye safu za uongozi nchini, hakuna rika lake hata mmoja.

Uteuzi mwingine uliowaacha wabongo vinywa wazi ni ule Basie Pesatatu Mramba kuwa kwenye baraza la mawaziri huku akiwa anajulikana alivyovurunda kwenye awamu ya tatu. Na hapa si Mramba peke yake, karibu wengi wa waliokuwa wakitiliwa shaka kwenye utawala uliopita aliwateua na anaendelea kufanya vitu vyake nao! Jamaa hatutamsahau hasa kwa nyodo zake za kutwambia tule majani ili anunua dege la rais na ten percent ifanikiwe.

Ukienda kwenye uteuzi mwingine kama vile wa mabalozi na majaji hata wakuu wa wilaya na mikoa unabaki kukuna kichwa na kuugulia. Wapo wanaompakazia Kikwete kuwa katika uteuzi wake huwa anaangalia mitandao, imani na wapi mtu atokako. Sie hatukubaliani na hili. Tunajua wazi kwa katiba yetu uoza na viraka, rais anaweza kumteua mkewe hata bibi yake kushika wadhifa wowote atakao kumpa iwe ni fadhila, takrima au vinginevyo.

Uteuzi mwingine ambao uliwaacha wabongo hoi ni ule wa mkurugenzi wa mawasiliano ikulu, Silva Rweye ambaye hakuna ubishi kuwa wakati wa kampeni aliitumia kalamu yake kumjenga Kikwete huku akiwabomoa wengine. Ingawa kufanya hivyo ni kinyume cha taaluma, si haba anapeta ukiachia mbali kuzua utata kutokana na majibu yake ambayo ukiyapima vizuri unahoji what’s up upstairs. Mfano aliwahi kusema kuwa kama serikali ingemtaka Daud Ballali ingemkamata. Ajabu wakati akipayuka hivyo, Ballali alikuwa akitakiwa atiwe mbaroni kujibu tuhuma za ujambazi wa EPA. Hata hivyo maneno ya Rweye yalikuja kuthibitika kuwa ya kweli pale Ballali alipopatikana na kufa kifo cha utata hadi kesho.

Jamaa huyu enzi zake kabla kalamu haijawa biashara mnadani aliweza kuitumia kumtoa fisadi yeyote roho kwa ugonjwa moyo. Wahenga walisema: mchawi mpe mtoto. Baada ya kuonjeshwa mahanjumati ya ukuu na ulaji wa dezo mbona aliweza kuyalamba manonihino yake bila hata chembe ya aibu! Kweli njaa ni ugonjwa mbaya sana hasa inapopanda kichwani.

Bado kuna uteuzi wa wazito kama Daudi. Matakataka, na vunja mbavu huu wa Noni ukiachia mbali ule wa Larensi Masha ambaye licha ya kuwa na uhusiano na mwanae kampuni yake iliguswa kwenye kashfa ya EPA.

Kinachofurahisha ni kwamba awamu ya kwanza ya utawala wa Kikwete umefanya yote haya ukijua changamoto yake kwa wapiga kura. Je kwenye ngwe lala salama tutaona maajabu gani? Ni suala la kukaa na kungoja. Muhimu ni kwa wapiga kura kufikiri mara mbili kama watataka kuepuka na kadhia na jinai kama hizi. Kimsingi dawa ya haya yote wanayo wapiga kura.



Tusisahau uteuzi wa Kikwete kwenye msimamo wa kumkingia kifua mtangulizi wake Benjamin Mkapa na hata harakati za sasa za kutaka kuchota pesa ya wanuka njaa wa Bongo kuipa Kiwira .

Utuzi wa mwisho wa Kikwete uliovutia wengi ni pale alipojiteua hivi karibuni kugombea urais kwa tiketi ya chama hata kabla ya muda kufika!

Tumalizie tulikoanzia. Kwa wale wanaoohoji na kushangaa Noni anakwenda TIB kwa sifa na kazi zipi wakumbuke. TIB ndipo zitakapowekwa pesa zilizorudishwa na majambazi wa EPA ambao Noni anawafahamu vizuri. Hakuna shaka huko nako atazishughulikia pesa hizi na kufanikisha uchaguzi mwakani. Nani hajui kuwa na siasa hasa vyeo vya juu ni investment tosha?

Hongera Kikwete kumteua Noni na wengine tuliowataja hapojuu. Si haba vitu vyako tunaviona na hakika kwa timu kama hii lazima tufike Misri kabla ya kuelekea Kanani.
Chanzo: Tanzania Daima, Juni 24, 2009.

Sherehesho la hotuba ya bajeti

NAMSHUKURU Subhana. Bajeti yangu inazidi kusifiwa na wote. Bajeti hii ya ukombozi na uchaguzi imevunja rekodi kujadiliwa na kupendwa. Jamaa wa majoho wameipenda kiasi cha kutaka niwe mkuu!

Ingawa wasiojua uchumi na kuchuma waliiponda eti kwa kuondoa misamaha ya kodi kwa asasi zisizo za kiserikali na mawese, hawakujua tunabana matumizi ili kupambana na mvurugiko wa uchumi duniani!

Kama waziri wa pesa na kuchuma, najipiga kifua nikisema ni bajeti ya karne. Uliwahi kusikia wapi bajeti yenye kuwatengea walevi bilioni 19 kwa ajili ya chai na vitafunwa? Haijawahi kutokea duniani isipokuwa Bongolala.

Kama tunalia vile! Bajeti iko wazi. Mkiilinganisha na bajeti za nchi nyingine mtaona mantiki. Kwa wenzenu hakuna hata senti moja ya maji ya kunywa wakati ninyi mna mabilioni ya chai na mahanjumati!

Wenzenu wamepiga marufuku mashangingi. Sisi tunataka kuwapa raha. Tunazidi kuyanunua kama hatuna akili nzuri na sifa ya taifa letu inakua.

Kama mtatupa kula tena mwakani, mtegemee bajeti yenye pesa hata ya manywaji kwa sana. Tuliwaahidi maisha bora kwa wote. Sasa mnataka nini iwapo mnakunywa chai ya mabilioni?

Nchi yenu imeokoka na kuslimu. Ndiyo maana tumepandisha bei za ulevi kuwaepushia adha ya kulewa na kutwangana makofi, kutenda maasi na kupayuka hovyo.

Pia tumepandisha bei ya vinywaji baridi ili kuepusha magonjwa ya unene na kisukari. Ndiyo sababu nuzuhu ya kutenga mabilioni kwa ajili ya chai.

Kwa kunywa chai sana , tutapakuza soko ambapo wakulima wa chai watanufaika na nchi kuingiza mapato mengi. Pia nchi itaingia kwenye kitabu cha maajabu cha Guinness kwa kuongoza kunywa chai duniani.

Pia wapingaji wasije wahadaa. Hatujapiga marufuku soda. Mnaruhusiwa kunywa soda wakati wa sherehe.

Na kwa upande wa kilevi, wenye pesa na madaraka watakuwa wanakunywa kwa niaba yenu. Wao hata wakilewa hawatendi dhambi na wakizitenda wanasamehewa. Ni wateule wa Mungu.

Pia wananchi wataruhusiwa kunywa bia wakati wa kampeni za uchafuzi mwakani. Kipindi hiki hawawezi kuhesabiwa dhambi, kwa kitambo, watageuka wateule wa Mungu.

Nisisitize. Takrima mbofu mbofu zinapigwa marufuku. Atakayetaka kutoa takrima atoe suti badala ya fulana na kofia.

Atoe mbuzi mzima baada ya vipande vya nyama choma. Ili kushushia, waheshimiwa watabanwa na sheria watoe kreti ya bia badala ya bia moja moja.

Kuhakikisha hili linafanikiwa, napendekeza serikali itoe pesa chini ya kanuni ya bailout. Hii itawezesha wakubwa kupata mishiko mikubwa kwa ajili ya kufanya mambo makubwa wakati wa kampeni.

Kuonyesha tulivyo mbele ya wengine, tumekopa pesa hii kwa riba ya asilimia 11. Kwa vile tuna huruma na kuna uchaguzi, tutawakopesha wazito kwa riba ya asilimia mbili. Mungu awape nini jamani? Majipu siyo? Kwa taarifa yenu, tumeweka masharti rahisi ya uchukuzi wa pesa hii.

Hakika mwakani mtaona na kuonja maajabu. Lifti za mashangingi zitapigwa marufuku. Na badala yake zitatolewa lifti za ndege ili umma uonje raha tunazokula kwa niaba yake.

Pia serikali itaongeza mshiko tokana na kodi ya ongezeko na thamani (VAT). Baada ya kuzinyakua nyumba za umma tumeona tutoze kodi ya ongezeko la thamani kwa wapangaji ili wawe na uchungu wajenge nyumba zao. Kila nyumba hata iwe ubavu wa dog ikipangishwa tunaitoza VAT ili kukuza uchumi.

Ndugu zangu walimu hili lisiwatishe. Tumepanga kuwajengea nyumba za ghorofa kila ilipo shule. Tumewapendelea baada ya kichaa mmoja kuwalamba bakora.

Badala ya kuwanunulia watoto matoi yaitwayo vifaa vya maabara, tumeona tuanze nanyi. Hata kama watoto wataendelea kukalia mawe msilaumu.

Hatukatai kuwanunulia madawati. Tunataka wakalie mawe ili wasikie uchungu wa kusoma. Maana wakikaa kwenye masofa watajisahau kwa raha na mineso.

Pia tumepanga kuongeza marupurupu na mishahara ya waheshimiwa wabunge kama watapitisha bajeti hii bila ubishi na kuchokoana.

Ingawa mmoja wao juzi katulaani mawaziri, tumemsamehe na tumeishapenyeza watu wetu kumshughulikia ili asiendelee kupayuka hovyo.

Pia wafahamu. Bajeti itapita watake wasitake. Najua wapo waliokamia kuikwamisha wasijue sisi tuna akili na mamlaka kuliko wao!

Chini ya katiba yetu ya ulaji, tutamwambia Bwana Kipaza sauti Six atumie Ibara ya 90 kifungu cha pili sehemu 'B' ya Katiba, nanukuu: mkuu atalazimika kuvunja Bunge iwapo litakataa kupitisha bajeti iliyowasilishwa na Serikali.

Kwa vile waheshimiwa wetu hamna ubavu na hamjiamini kwenye majimbo yenu kutokana na tabia yenu ya kupenda kukaa Bongo mkifanya biashara zenu, ukiondoa wabunge wa upingaji, hakuna mbunge wa genge letu atafanya fyoko zaidi ya kupiga kura ya ndiyo.

Na hii ndiyo sababu tunajiandalia bajeti kwa kuangalia maslahi yetu. Tunajua wazi kifungu cha 90 kipo kuwatia adabu na mkafyata mikia. Upo hapo?

Isitoshe wahishimiwa wa Bongo na wabongo kwa mkwara nawajua sana mtapiga mikwara yenu uchwara lakini serikali itakapochimba wake mtanywea.

Mkijifanya kujua jua hata haya marupurupu tunayowahonga tunayanyofoa tuone kama mtakula polisi.

Angalia bajeti inavyowapendelea. Nchi nyingine zimepiga vita mashangingi. Sisi tunazidi kuwapa kama hatuna akili nzuri.

Nyinyi, kama tutalinganisha na kipato cha taifa letu, mna mishahara na marupurupu makubwa kuliko hata maseneta wa kwa Obama.

Kule ukiwa seneta au mwakilishi hakuna cha dereva, mfagiaji, shamba boy wala mlinzi kama tulivyowafanyia. Wala huko wenzenu hawapigiwi saluti kama nyinyi. Sasa mnataka serikali yenu iwape nini?

Nimalizie kwa kutoa ushauri kwa ndugu zangu wa majoho.

Mnajua ni kwa nini tumeondoa misamaha ya kodi? Pamoja na wenzenu wachache kuitumia kujitajirisha kama jamaa wa TRA, mmechonga sana mkitusakizia kuwa tunaongoza kifisadi na kifisi na hatupambani na ufisadi. Unadhani bila ufisadi kuna mtu angependa siasa. Shauri yenu.

Muda hautoshi. Naomba kutoa hoja na kukaribisha maoni.

Makofi kutoka kwa wahishimiwa hata kama mmenuna kwa kulazimishwa kupitisha silaha za maangamizi kwa pesa ya walalahoi.
Chanzo: Tanzania Daima Juni 24, 2009.

Bongo's Death Lesson to Remaining Thieves-in-Chief.

Albert Bernard Omar Bongo Ondimba former Gabonese dictator was but a symbol of rot, greed, shame, myopia, hypocrisy and controversy.

"I'm glad to be honest with you. I know that you don't really rejoice from someone’s death".

One anonymous teacher was quoted as saying when the news of the death of the tyrant surfaced. This tells all regarding how a common man in the street views dictators who pretend to be loved whilst the opposite is true.

Though this can be wrongly seen as preaching recusancy and ridiculing the dead, the truth is, dictators have no good legacy but rot and hatred. How can people love their tormentors and exploiters?

Like Gnassigbe Eyadema ( Togo ) Joseph Desire Mobutu (DRC), Sani Abacha ( Nigeria ) and Felix Hauphet Boigny ( Ivory Coast ), Bongo did nothing for his country but to rob it and bring shame to it. To him Gabon was but his private estate he used he deemed fit. Some will say he built roads even schools and what not. But looking at how much he stole and how much people deserve, all end up being nothing comparably.

Like other living African dictators, Bongo did nary bother about tomorrow. To him, death was an illusion. And this is why even when he was dead, his stooges denied this reality!

He’s now confirmed dead. He died in Spain where he was receiving treatments. But what folly! The nation was told he was in Spain for just check up and holiday not sick!

Swahili sage has it that, he who hides illness death will shame him. Or he who hides fire smoke will shame him as it happened in the death of this despot that plundered his country for a good forty two years.

Bongo, a short put like North Korean Kim Jong Il, that used high heel shoes to conceal his dwarfism, goes down as an illiterate that was used by France to rob his country not to mention killing his opponent when it was impossible to purchase them.

Good news is African has been relieved of another dictator after Eyadema. This is a stalk warning for living dictators who think not about tomorrow. Yesterday we got rid of Eyadema; today Bongo, maybe, tomorrow God will intervene and claim another. Who knows? We can fear or being corrupted by them but not God.

After raping his country, Bongo had nothing left for him to be proud of but presidency he hijacked. Rooted on tribalism and nepotism, his rule was shaped by a few thieves from his family and tribe. His daughter Pascaline was his chief of staff just like Natasha Kainerugaba Museveni Karugira who’s her father’s private secretary, whilst his son Ali Ben-Bongo is minister for defence, like Muhoozi, that has much power in Ugandan military ranks .Bongo’s stooge, the leader of the senate; Rose Francine Rogombe is now constitutionally an interim president paving the way for Bongo Jr. to take his father’s throne! What does this mean? Shall Gabonese not watch Bongo will go on ruling them posthumously just like Eyadema!

Ben-Bongo is touted, like Faure Eyadema, to take the helm after transition period.

One thing I have learnt about dictators is: they like intermarriage and nepotism. Bongo was married to the daughter of Congo ’s dictator, Denis Sassou Ngweso, Edith Lucie who died in March. This is why I have singled Museveni’s family out to show this trait. Muhoozi is married to the daughter of his father’s stooge Sam Kutesa.

Till his death, Bongo was the longest African ruler that ruled for 42. Thereafter comes Muamar Gadaffi, Jose Eduardo Dos Santos, Paul Biya, Hosni Mubarak, Robert Mugabe, Denis Sassou Ngwesso, Yoweri Museveni, Isayaas Afowerki, Zine al-Abidine Ben Ali, Omar Bashir,Teodoro Obiang Nguema, Yahaya Jammeh and Mswati III.

Nonetheless, above potentates behave exactly the same as Bongo; they need to take a page from the book of reality. Life is subject to death and one day they’ll face it.

When Bongo died some wisecracks surfaced from the PM, Jean Eyeghe Ndong. He flatly denied the death of his boss when the news broke quoting Le Monde. Sick dictators and their cronies lack self pity. Within the same day of denial the same sheep like stooge admitted the tyrant was no more!

And this is the main character of all draconian regimes. They live in the state of denial when it comes to the state of the nation. Recently, there were many questions in Uganda with regard to why Ugandan Tyrant Museveni was recently using left hand to greet people whilst the right one is bandaged. As of now, no reasonable answer has ever been advanced with regard to this anomaly!

What’s more, reports regarding the cause of death of Bongo say it is cancer. But Gabonese public was told it is heat attack! Behind the curtains cronies are caught up in the eddy of protocol confusion not to mention manipulation. The tyrant left many things unmet importantly being the successor. Internet was cut off in order to avoid information reaching the people.

And this has always been the shape of Bongo’s thievish regime. Looking at the population of 1.4 million and the income Gabon gets from oil, one would think of having a rich population. But nay! All the moneys from oil, like Congo , Equatorial Guinea , Nigeria and Angola have gone to the ruling cabal of thieves and west countries that keep them in power as opposed to the will of a great unwashed.

This is the main reason Africa is always poor. Many African potentates offer their resources to west countries so as to illegally remain in power. And sadly, western countries do not want to address this anomaly. And this is why we’d stress that stealing from public coffers must be categorized as a crime against humanity.

More on Bongo, differently from other dangerously stinking tyrant, he was smart at one thing he goes down with. Being Mr. Moneybags, he’d buy loyalty from any bunch of self absorbed goons, power hooch and whiners at any cost. This is why he’s able to survive in power for over four decades without felling many opponents. So, buying loyalty does not end up home only. It goes as far as to the so-called international community. This is why Pakistan former dictator Parvez Musharaff was able to sit on nukes whilst the other one in North Korea is always given a heck.

Though he castrated his opponents, the magnitude and number is not as big as other dictators history knows.

In a nutshell, this is the fallen tyrant that was the longest African ruler.

Is It Tax Exemptions or Rip -Off?

IT appalls to call robber by consent tax exemption or whatever sexed-up name and this puts the power that be in the till. Reports that a begging nation like ours lost 587bn/- thanks to tax exemption in a just ten month period are shockingly disturbing.

The Tanzania Revenue Authority (TRA) Board Chair, Dr Marcellina Chijoriga, told the Parliamentary Committee for Finance and Economy recently that the exemptions were made between July 2008 to April 2009 – cool 18.38bn/- of the total amount was given away in Zanzibar.

In this rip-off, as per Chijoriga, Tanzania Investment Centre (TIC) scored high at 83% or 362.6bn/-. One would wonder. Is this investment or rip-off?

Others that befriended include state-owned organisations (5.97bn/-), government institutions (8.8bn/-), religious and other non-governmental organisations (34.7bn/-), while donor-funded projects got exemptions amounting to 21.1bn/-.

Others that gnawed 154.2bn/- in exemptions, mainly by means of duty-free shops, special exemptions and zero rated exemptions! “The exemptions on the Mainland were equal to 30 per cent of the total 1.45tr/- collected by the Customs Department for those ten months only,” Chijoriga keened.

Our budget depends on donors at the tune of over 30%. At the same time, we award almost the same amount to swindlers! What a curse!

I can’t just imagine. How many schools or hospitals this gargantuan amount would build. Help me. How many students this amount would see through in colleges? How many kilometers of our dilapidated roads this amount would build? I don’t know. People in a forgotten region like Kigoma would understand and accept this!

What adds up even more is when we’re offering tax holidays and exemptions to some swindlers, our paupers are sinking in destitution as our rulers crushingly go cup in hand from one rich country to another. Gravely, we still promise them better life! Where do we get this grit for God’s sake?

Whilst this sacrilegious opprobrium is unleashed, a few thieves in high offices make a kill so as to become tycoons as a great many unwashed suffer even more!

The other day I averred that Bongo is richer than other wrongly think. What amiss is but vision and trustworthy, and of course, sane minds in the upper echelons of power.

To grasp what I mean, look at those we offer tax exemption. They blind us by giving our pauper leftover they call misaada. The other day I heard that one lady that heads a certain suspicious church offered over 20,000,000/- to women in Morogoro.

Unfortunately though, nobody asked how she printed such moneys! Isn’t the same money we offered to her briefcase church from which she gets leftover to offer to our women?

Those who know how corruption operates can show you some chaps that man and own religious outfits they use to get tax exemption they extend to business people who pay them after getting their items into the country without paying any tax. And this is why NGOs and religious outfits are mushrooming. It is a lucrative business.

To know what I mean, look at the paupers of yesterday who become tycoons overnight after establishing their churches or whatever outfits. That’s why the number of self-ordained religious leaders is surging every day. Ni ulaji wa dezo.

Are they frying a fish with its own oil? Who knows and who cares if at all corruption is becoming an order of the day?

Somebody has to say something. I condemn this monkey business. No way one can comfortably sit idly by as our money is being swindled.

We always sing good governance. Is there any good governance with all this daylight robbery? While this heinous crime is committed, we still have guts to overtax our paupers! Look at stuffs like VAT, Income tax, payroll tax, stump duty, sales tax, hidden tax and what not. Isn’t this stealing from them really?

We still go thumb-up assuring our paupers that we’ll deliver! Why should we make tax evasion a crime but not tax exemption? Is it because those that exempt other are the high and mighty?

Let’s face it point blank. What is said to be tax exemption sounds as rip-off to me. This way, our country is doomed and shall it remain as this, verily we’re but finished. And this is true not preaching recusancy.
Source: Thisday June 17, 2009.

Kikwete, Musa hadi Farao na Yusufu!

MCHUNGAJI Lawi Mwankuge wa kanisa la Moravian Ruaha Kidatu, Morogoro alikaririwa na TBC1 hivi karibuni akihoji; “yuko wapi Yusufu wetu wa kuwasaidia viongozi wetu”;

Hii ni baada ya kutangazwa bajeti iliyoua misamaha ya kodi kwa mashirika yasiyo ya kiserikali (NGO).

Kwa wanaokumbuka kauli mbinu ya rais Jakaya Kikwete (wakati ule Musa) ya kuwatoa watu Misri (kwa Benjamin Mkapa) kwenda Kanani ( ambako sasa kumegeuka kubaya zaidi ya alipowakuta), watakubaliana nami: kwa sasa, Kikwete hana sifa tena ya kuitwa Musa kama alivyoingia. Mchungaji ametusaidia. Amemlinganisha na Farao.

Kwanza hajatekeleza ahadi hata moja ukiachia mbali kuzidi kuvuruga. Kwa mfano, Kikwete aliahidi kupambana na ufisadi kama njia moja wapo ya kuokoa pesa ambayo ingetumika kuwaletea watu maisha bora chini ya kauli yake mbinu nyingine ya maisha bora kwa wote. Bahati mbaya sana , maisha bora kwa wote yamegeuka kuwa maisha bora kwa wote waliomzunguka Kikwete na si watanzania kama walivyohadaiwa. Mafisadi wanatetewa hata na mawaziri wake bila ya kuogopa wala bosi wao kuwakemea!

Pili, Kikwete aliahidi kuwa na nidhamu ya matumizi ya pesa ya serikali. Kwa taarifa ya ripoti ya mdhibiti mkuu wa fedha za serikali (CAG), tangu aingie madarakani, karibu kila mwaka, serikali yake inapata alama chafu katika suala hili. Amekuwa akitumia pesa nyingi kusafiri nje ukiachia mbali kuwaachia watuhumiwa wa wizi wa mabilioni yanayosemekana kutumika kumuingiza madarakani.

Tatu ameunda serikali kubwa sana kuliko ya mtangulizi wake ukiachia mbali kuwavumilia na kuwateua watu wanaotia shaka. Mfano wa karibuni ni kumteua Peter Mayunga Noni kuwa mkuu wa Benki ya raslimali (TIB) huku Noni akiwa ametajwa wazi wazi kwenye wizi wa pesa toka benki kuu kwenye mfuko wa madeni ya nje (EPA). Rejea kutajwa na mwanasheria Bhyidinka Michael Sanze aliyesema alishuhudia majadiliano ya wizi huu. Bahati mbaya si Noni, wala Mkapa au watajwa wengine wamekanusha madai ya mwanasheria huyu.

Rejea kuendelea kuwanyamazia na kuwabakiza kazini mwanasheria mkuu wa serikali na mkurugenzi wa Takukuru walioguswa moja kwa moja kwenye kashfa ya Richmond .

Ziko wapi nyumba za umma zilizotwaliwa na Mkapa na mawaziri wake na Kikwete akiwamo? Iko wapi vita ya kupambana na wauza mihadarati na majambazi? Ajabu, Kikwete alijitutumua kuwakamata majambazi wakubwa. Lakini baada ya kukuta kuwa kumbe wengi ni wafadhili wa CCM zoezi hili lilikufa kifo cha mende huku Kikwete akiendelea kuuaminisha umma kuwa ataukomboa. Kwa mdomo ameukomboa sana . Kwa matendo ameupeleka hata zaidi ya Misri. Kama tutaangalia rekodi ya Kikwete, bila shaka, tutagundua kuwa umma ulioahidiwa kwenda Kanani umeishakatiza Misri. Karibuni utaingia Sudan !

Ajabu ya maajabu, Kikwete aliwahi kukiri kuwa anayo orodha ya majambazi na wauza mihadarati! Kama kweli anayo kwanini asiwashughulikie? Ana maslahi gani na biashara hii?

Ukimlinganisha na Mkapa aliyemlinganisha na Farao hadi akatunga kauli mbiu ya kuwapeleka watu Kanani, Kikwete ni sawa na kichuguu mbele yam lima .

Tutatoa sababu. Katika muhula wake wa kwanza, Mkapa alijitahidi kubana matumizi ya pesa ya serikali huku akiubana mfumko wa bei. Pia aliziba mianya ya ukwepaji kodi kiasi cha kutunisha mapato ya taifa yatokanayo na kodi. Kwa ufupi alionyesha dira ya taifa ingawa baada ya kulewa madaraka huku akivutiwa na ushawishi wa mkewe mjasirimali, katika muhula wa pili, Mkapa alibomoa kila jema alilokuwa amelijenga. Na laiti asingefanya hivi, angeweza kuvaa hata viatu vya mtu aliyemtengeneza, Mwalimu Julius Nyerere.

Kwani Mkapa alijiingiza kwenye unyakuzi machimbo ya makaa ya mawe ya Kiwira yakiwa ni kongwa atakayokwenda nayo kaburini ukiachia mbali shutuma lukuki kumuelekea mkewe aliyeanza biashara kwa kuanzisha NGO ya Fursa sawa kwa wote ingawa wote walikuwa wote anaowajua yeye na mumewe. Hapa hujaongelea uwekezaji wa kijambazi ulioongozwa na cha juu.

Mkapa atakumbukwa japo kwa ubaya kwa kuigawa benki yetu ya Biashara (NBC) kuihujumu Tanesco kwa kuruhusu shemeji zake waiingize kampuni ya kikaburu ya Net Group Solution ambayo kimsingi iliiua na kuthibitisha ilivyokuwa Net Problems.

Pigo la mwisho la Mkapa ilikuwa ni kulewa madaraka na kuwa na kiburi. Alianza kuwashambulia waliomkosoa (akina Yusufu). Alifikia hatua hata ya kuwafutia wengine uraia na kuwazodoa hadharani kuwa nao walikuwa wachafu kama yeye. Kikwete anatumia mbinu ya kujifanya hasikii. Yote hii ni kibri na ukosefu wa utawala bora.

Ya Mkapa sasa ni historia. Anaishi kwa kulindwa na rais Kikwete. Kitendo hiki kimewashangaza na kuwachukiza wengi. Wazungu husema: show me your friends I will tell you who you are. Nionyeshe marafiki zako nitakwambia wewe ni nani.

Hapa ndipo, kwa mara nyingine u-Musa wa Kikwete unayeyuka kiasi cha mchungaji Mwankuge kumlinganisha na Farao.

Farao aliwatesa waisraeli sawa na Kikwete anavyofanya. Kwani aliwatwisha mzigo wa kunyonywa na kudhalilishwa. Wizi wa EPA, Richmond , Dowan, IPTL, TICT, CIS, NSSF, ANBEN, Tanpower, Fosnik na mwingine mwingi hauna tofauti na matendo ya Faroa.

Kwanini tuendako maneno ya Mwankuge yanaweza kubeba ukweli usiopingika? Kikwete haonyeshi kujifunza wala kurekebika hata abebwe namna gani. Jiulize. Sasa ni mwaka wa tano tangu aingie madarakani. Ameishatimiza ahadi gani? Hata aliposhauriwa kuachana na uwaziri wa mambo ya nchi za nje yaani kupoteza muda mwingi na pesa ughaibuni, hakuacha. Hivi karibuni jarida la kimataifa linaloheshimika la The Economist lilimtolea uvivu na kusema: ziara zake zinalihujumu taifa. Kama kawaida yake, hakujibu wala kujali.

Ameendelea kumvumilia malkia wake kuendesha biashara ya NGO sawa na ya mke wa mtangulizi wake. Ingawa Mkapa anachukiwa kwa aibu na uroho alioonyesha kwa kukwapua mali ya umma, ukiwaweka kwenye mizani na Kikwete, Mkapa anaweza kuwa bora. Maana kwenye muhula wa kwanza angalau alionyesha nini maana ya utawala.

Wachambuzi wengi wa mambo wanakubaliana kuwa kama Kikwete atachaguliwa kwa muhula wa pili na akaendelea kama alivyo sasa, ataiacha nchi pabaya kiasi cha kuweza kuzusha hata vurugu na amani tunayojivunia ikatoweka. Hapawezi kuwa na amani ya kweli bila haki.

Akina Yusufu tumesema hadi makoo yamekauka. Mwenzetu ana kinywa kipana lakini hana masikio kabisa. Anajua kusema si kutenda. Yeye ni mtu wa kucheza na hadhira jukwaani lakini mwoga wa kuingia kwenye medani. Huu ndiyo watani wake huuita usanii. Tatizo si kuwepo Yusufu bali Yusufu wapi awasikilize.

Kama tutamtendea haki Kikwete, si vibaya kumlinganisha na Farao. Hata wakati Farao anaweza kuwa na nafuu. Kwa sababu hakuwaahidi waisraeli ukombozi wowote.
Chanzo : Tanzania Daima Juni 17, 2009.

Bajeti ya Mheshimiwa Mpayukaji Waziri Wa Pesa

HUWEZI kuamini. Jana niliota nikiwa Waziri wa Pesa, Mstaafu Mkulu! Baada ya kula magimbi na mbwanda, kama mlalahoi, nilijibwaga kitandani jirani na Bi Mkubwa.

Tulidurusu tuliyodurusu na kila mmoja akageukia upande wake na kuuchapa usingizi. Mara naanza kuota nikitoka ofisini kwangu Magogoni naelekea Uwanja wa Ndege wa Mwalimu kupanda pipa kuelekea Idodomya kuwadodomya na kuwabamiza mkenge walevi.

Nimekula suti ya bei mbaya niliyoinunua Paris na tai ya udhulungi. Nimeulamba kweli kweli kiasi cha kumuacha Bi. Mkubwa akiugulia, huenda huko nitapata dogodogo wa kuniliwaza baada ya kukausha koo nikiwaweka sawa walevi.

Kufika airport natoa maelezo kwa dereva na wasaidizi wangu na kujitoma VIP lounge tayari kupaa. Haichukui muda wanakuja wasaidizi wangu kuniashiria niingie kwenye lango la kuelekea kwenye pipa.

Ndani ya pipa nawakuta wasichana wenye kutabasamu kila saa. Wananikaribisha na pipa linaanza kutimua kuelekea Kipawa tayari kuelekea Dom. Baada ya kutoka uwanjani naelekea kwenye hoteli ya bei mbaya na kubadili suti tayari kuingia bungeni.

Naingia bungeni nikiwa na mkoba wangu wa maangamizi ya pesa ya umma (MPU). Wapiga picha wa vyombo mbali mbali vya habari wananipiga picha kama hawana akili nzuri.

Kwa mikogo na bashasha, natokomea ukumbini na kwenda moja moja kuanza kusoma bajeti ya serikali yangu ombaomba.

Naanza. Mwishiwa Spika, waishiwa wabunge, mawaziri na wananchi kwa ujumla. Watukutu, ifuatayo ni bajeti ya mwaka wa fedha 2009/10.

Utangulizi

Kwanza niseme wazi, hii ni bajeti ya ukombozi wa mlevi na uchaguzi ambayo haijawahi kutungwa katika historia ya taifa hili.

Mwishiwa Spika

Bajeti ya mwaka huu imeongezwa kwa asilimia 365 kutoka bilioni nonihino hadi zilioni moja na ukwaju. Nakohoa na kuendelea. Shughuli za utawala zitakula asilimia 88 na za maendeleo tisa, huku mengineyo yakitumia idadi iliyobaki.

Nchi yetu imeendelea sana hivyo tumepunguza shughuli za maendeleo na kuongeza utawala ili kuwa na utawala bora.

Pia, tumelenga kumkomboa mlevi hasa katika kipindi hiki cha kuvurugika kwa uchumi wa dunia. Ingawa awali nilichemsha nikasema mtikisiko hautalikumba taifa la walevi, niligundua: wataalamu wangu walitafsiri vibaya Kiingereza.

Nilichomaanisha, taifa lingetikisika sana. Hii ndiyo sababu ya kila tatizo mnaloona nchini. Wanaosingizia ufisadi msiwasikilize. Hawajui mambo ya uchumi na kuchuma.

Mwishiwa Spika

Kama nilivyosema hapo awali, bajeti hii ni ya ukombozi wa walevi. Katika kuiandaa tumeangalia mambo mbalimbali na kuyapa vipaumbele.

Mwishiwa Spika

Mwakani tuna uchaguzi. Tumejitahidi kulegeza masharti kwa wananchi ili waweze kutupa kura za kuula. Kufanya hivyo, tumeondoa kodi ya vitambi na vitimbi.

Pia tumepandisha bei za vileo ili kuwaepushia walevi kulewa na kupiga wake zao ukiachia mbali kusahau kupiga kura.

Mwishiwa Spika

Wananchi wa jimbo langu, la mkuu, waziri wa pesa wa zamani na mengine ya marafiki zangu yatanufaika sana na bajeti hii. Tutatengeneza barabara ziendazo na zitokazo huko kuepusha mashangingi yetu kuharibika.

Pia, tutazijenga na kuwa na njia tano kuepusha usumbufu na upotevu wa muda wa waheshimiwa wanapokwenda huko kwa ajili ya ama sherehe za ndoa, ubarikio ama graduation. Pia itaepusha kuvunjika migongo wanaposafiri kuelekea huko.

Pia, tutaagiza mashangingi mengi hata kwa ajili ya nyumba ndogo zetu hata kama wenzetu Kenya kwa uzembe wao wameyapiga marufuku. Hatuna haja ya kuogopa kutumia mashangingi. Tunatumia pesa ya umma haiumi.

Mwishiwa Spika

Kwa majimbo ambayo barabara zake hazitaonekana kwenye bajeti wavumilie hadi watakapotoa mawaziri wa pesa na wakuu. Pia, wajue hii si adhabu. Tumeacha kuzitengea pesa kwa sababu ya kuepuka kuongezeka kwa machinga jijini.

Barabara zikiwa nzuri, watu watakimbia vijijini kiasi cha kuathiri sekta ya kilimo ambayo ni tako la taifa. Hivyo bila tako taifa litashindwa kukaa hata wakubwa hawataweza kukaa na kufaidi viyoyozi. Tutapanua kilimo vipi? Usitake kujua.

Mwishiwa Spika

Pia, tumepungaza bajeti ya elimu hasa ya juu. Hii ni kutokana na ukweli kuwa walevi wamesoma sana kiasi cha kuwa na wabunge wenye PhD hata kama ni za kuchongwa.

Hivyo hatuhitaji wasomi tena. Hivyo pesa ambayo ingepotea bure huko itaenda kwenye kununua mashangingi mapya na kukarabati ikulu na ofisi za mawaziri.

Mwishiwa Spika

Walevi watafaidika na bajeti hii. Japo wengi walinilaumu kwa kufungua tawi la DESI jimboni mwangu, nilitaka kupata uzoefu jinsi ya kueneza utajiri wa wote ili kutimiza ile ahadi ya maisha bora kwa wote aliyotoa mkuu.

Mwishiwa Spika

Kutokana na sababu za kiusalama, sitataja kiwango cha pesa zilizotengwa kwa baadhi ya taasisi nyeti kama ikulu, ulinzi, huduma za bunge, viwanda na uwekezaji na nyingine zinazoangukia kwenye category hii.

In fwact, I mean. Calculations za bajeti hii zime-base kwenye projection na trajectory ya uchumi wa kisasa wa karne ya sayansi na tekelinalokuijia.

Mwishiwa Spika

Kwa mfano ukitaja bajeti ya viwanda na uwekezaji utawafukuza wawekezaji. Hivyo mwishiwa spika, nisisitize; bajeti hii itamkomboa mlevi kutokana na kupanda kwa asilimia 365.

Mwishiwa Spika

Nitaje vyanzo vya mapato ya serikali.

Kwanza ni kodi. Hii italiingizia taifa pesa sawa na asilimia sitini. Hivyo asilimia arobaini iliyobaki tutakopa na kuomba wakoloni, sorry, wafadhili. Na hapa nisisitize. Walevi wakiona tunakwenda sana ng’ambo waelewe tunakwenda kutafuta pesa ya kujazia kwenye bajeti.

Mitumba itatozwa kodi kubwa isipokuwa ya magari ya kifahari. Hatuwezi kuendekeza mitumba hata kwenye miili hata kama vichwani tu mitumba.

Mwaka huu safari za mawaziri mikoani kuelimisha umma juu ya bajeti hazitakuwapo. Badala yake tutakwenda kuanza kampeni kabla ya tume kutangaza. Pia tutakwenda majuu kuvutia wawekezaji kama waziri wa zamani Niziro Kadamage.

Mwishiwa Spika

Bajeti ya mwaka huu ni ya uwajibikaji na kupambana na ufisadi na wizi wa kura na fadhila. Mwaka unaokwisha wa pesa tulivunja rekodi ya kusamehe kodi. Mwaka huu nitakufa na mtu.

Hapatakuwa na cha EPA, Tax exemption and tax profligacy hata kama inahitajika pesa ya takrima kwenye uchaguzi ujao. Kila mtu ajijue.

Nimetenga asilimia 13 ya bajeti kwa ajili ya kuhakikisha pesa ya bajeti haiibiwi kama ilivyokuwa huko nyuma. Kabla ya kuendelea nasikia miguno na mpuuzi mmoja anasema. “Mbona wizi ndani ya wizi!”

Nikiwa nimefura, nilipayuka kwa hasira nasema. “Mtake msitake mwaka huu mtafunga mikanda ili kunogesha mambo.” Nikiwa naendelea kujiotea si Bi Mkubwa aliniamsha kwa kipepsi akidai nawaota hawara zangu tena kitandani kwake!

Alisema: “Mume wangu, yaani umefikia mahali kuwaambia hawara zako wafungue mikanda ili mambo yanoge mbele yangu!” Najibu. “Mbona nilikuwa naota nikiwa waziri wa pesa nikisoma bajeti bungeni mke wangu.”

Hakieleweki kitu. Mara tunaanza kupigana tukigombea bajeti ya ndoto na maangamizi ya pesa ya umma. Tulirejea kwenye mazonge sawa na mlalahoi yoyote ambaye kwake bajeti ni kilio ili wakubwa watanue.

Na hii ndiyo tuliyomaanisha tuliposema maisha bora kwa wote. Wote sisi, si wote wote. Mwenye akili na aelewe na mwenye masikio na asikie, ili tusianze kulaumiana kuwa hatukutekeleza ahadi zetu.
Chanzo: Tanzania Daima Juni 17, 2009.