Kenya haiwalindi vihiyo

Waziri mdogo wa Makazi nambunge wa Starehe nchini Kenya Askofu wa kujibandika, Magreth Wanjiru hatagombea Ugavana wa jiji la Nairobi 

uchaguzi ujao. Hii ni kutokana na kukutikana ameghushi shahada kiasi cha kujiita Daktari wakati ni kihiyo wa kawaida. Hii ni tofauti sana na Tanzania ambako vihiyo wanaojulikana kama vile Mary Nagu, Makongoro Mahanga, Diodorous Kamala, Emanuel Nchimbi, William Lukuvi, Didace Massaburi na wengine wanalindwa hata kufikia kuteuliwa kwenye vyeo kama uwaziri na kuchaguliwa umeya. Kwa habari zaidi GONGA hapa.

Ndege yauzwa sh. 500,000!

Ufisadi unapofusha na kuharibu akili za watu. Nani angeamini kuwa ndege ingeuzwa shilingi za kitanzania laki tano? Kauziwa nani? Hata waziri wa serikali anaogopa kuuliza na kupewa jibu. Je huu mchezo ulianza lini na umeishaliingizia taifa hasara kiasi gani?  Inashangaza kuona madudu kama haya yanatendwa katika nchi maskini kama yetu! Utakuta wahusika wanaiba vipuri na kuvificha halafu wanauziana ndege kwa bei ya ubuyu. Namna hii tutashindwa kuuana huko tuendako? Hivi rais Jakaya Kikwete na genge lake wanataka kutufikisha wapi yarabi?  Ukisoma jinsi waziri alivyohoji ufisadi huu na namna alivyotoa maelezo yenye utata, utagundua kuwa nchi imefikia pabaya. Hapa tunaongelea ndege, Kama ndege inauzwa laki tano hayo magari si yatauzwa shilingi tano? Kwa habari zaidi BONYEZA hapa.

Mibaka na majambazi wetu jifunze kwa Bill Gates

Tumemaliza mwaka kwa habari mbaya na chafu ya kukua kwa deni la taifa kwa asilimia 400. Mwaka 2007, kwa mujibu wa magazeti lilikuwa ni dola bilioni 3. Hadi mwishoni mwa mwaka jana lilichumpa hadi dola bilioni 14! Nini kimefanyika cha maana zaidi ya wizi kama kawa? Muulize bwana rais na wenzake.
Wakati mataifa mengine yakijifunga mikanda na kukuza chumi zao kwa kupunguza au kuachana na utegemezi na kopakopa, Tanzania ndiyo inapanua mkanda kukopa na kuombaomba. Laiti jinai hii ingeishia hapa. Wenzetu wenye madaraka wanashindana kutuibia wanyonge tena wakitumia hilo chumo la wizi kutuhonga eti tuzidi kuwapa ulaji zaidi kwa kuwachagua! Je sisi ni vichaa na mataahhira au wafu wanaotembea? Je tumekosa kumbukumbu hata ya mambo muhimu kama haya?
Kuzidi kuumka kwa deni la taifa maana yake ni kwamba wezi wetu walioko kwenye madaraka waliiba sana kwenye mwaka uliopita.
Watu wenye akili na visheni kama Bill Gates tunaambiwa kwa mwaka jana tu wametengeneza faida zaidi ya nusu ya deni letu la taifa. Ni ajabu rais Jakaya Kikwete bado anajifisia upumbavu kupitia waziri wake wa fedha (fedheha) William Mgimwa kuwa watanzania wasiwe na wasi wasi kwa vile seerikali imewekeza kwenye huduma za jamii. Huduma gani za jamii wakati mgao wa umeme, uhaba wa maji, uduni wa huduma za afya na elimu vinazidi kupanda chati?
Mgimwa bila aibu anaongeza kusema kuwa serikali imewekeza kwenye miundombinu! Anaanisha miundo mbinu ya Magufuli ya vodafasta siyo? Rejea tarehe 2 Januari daraja linalounganisha kanda ya ziwa na Pwani lilipoharibika kule Singida kutokana na kujengwa chini ya kiwango. Hiyo ndiyo miundo mbinu anayojitapa nayo Mgimwa? Shame on you Mgimwa!
Tukubaliane kuwa Kikwete ameshindwa nchi na ataishia kuwa janga la kitaifa ambalo watanzania hawatasahau maisha yao.
Kwa waliofanikiwa kama Bill Gates hebu GONGA hapa kwa taarifa zaidi.

Do you know African Princes?

The following are the sons of current African presidents who wage enormous power under the rule of their fathers. This rotten culture is currently becoming a norm if not mores in Africa. Along with those princes there are princess who share beds with presidents in the name of first ladies. They, too, have their unchecked powers in many African countries.

Jean Francois Bozize-Minister of Defense (CAR)

Theodore Obiang Nguema Vice President Equatorial GuineaRidhiwan Kikwete member of Central Committee of the ruling Party Tanzania
Brig. Muhoozi Yoweri Museveni (Uganda) Commander of the Special Force group charged with protecting his father. Christel Denis Sassou Ngwesso heads National Petroleum utility.

Simone Gbagbo Indictment : African First Ladies Must Beware

News that the International Criminal Court (ICC) has issued an arrest warrant for Simone Gbagbo (63) the wife of former Ivorian president, Laurent Gbagbo charged with committing crimes against humanity is a welcome.

Mrs. Gbagbo and her husband were dug out of the bunker by UN and French forces who assaulted their residence in April 2011 after a five month standoff that left the country paralyzed politically, socially, and economically.

For those who hate the snowballing malpractices whereby the spouses and children of presidents usurp their relatives’ power, such bold move is commendable and welcome. At least, somebody somewhere can keep tabs on these mighty creatures of our dirty politics.

Africa is currently evidencing broad light robbery committed by a new crop of rotten and corrupt rulers who pointlessly allow their families and friends to abusively use their power to rob the public. Almost in many African countries, there are unofficial “presidents” behind the curtain in the name of wives, children, and partners not to mention the cabal of courtiers in the upper echelons of power. They make much money buy simply vending the office of president. In this business of vending presidency, many African countries have become wantonly bankrupt.

Back on Mrs. Gbagbo, the BBC reported of the warrants. It wrote, “She was responsible for "the crimes against humanity of murder, rape and other forms of sexual violence, other inhumane acts and persecution.”

Gbagbo’s regime was booted out in 2011 after a long standoff between his forces and those of his former rival-cum-opponent, current president of Ivory Coast, Alassane Ouattra. Gbagbo organized sham elections and once he realized he would not win, he decided to cling unto power unconstitutionally the move that force international community to intervene. This move saw Gbagbo off from power after chaos left 3,000 people dead thousands displaced.

Now it is obvious that Gbagbo and his wife are going to face the music. Gbagbo was captured and handed over to the ICC by the authorities in Ivory Coast in April 2011 after his government fell. Apart from facing charges before The Hague, Gbagbo and his wife also were charged with economic crimes such as robbery, looting and embezzlement in Ivory Coast.

Simone, a doctor of History was instrumental ideologically for her husband. And she is said to have orchestrated She waged unfettered humongous power during her husband’s presidency. Differently from other seating African president, the Gbagbos, just like any other African kleptoclatic and nepotic rulers, did involve their children effectively. Gbagbo’s son Michel is facing charges of participating in violence that saw over 3,000 dead. This means that the whole family is behind the bar simply because they were able to abuse the power of the president. What transpired in Egypt where the former dictator and his sons are behind bars is once again repeating itself in another African country. Like a blind family, there was nobody to warn others of the bandwagon of benefitting from the power of the president. Greed comes first and regrets later the Swahili sage has it. Whether the children are likely to surface before ICC is the matter of time. Given that the whole family partook of the dirty fame of violence, chances are that they’ll be issued with the warrants.

Simone becomes the first African woman and the first- first lady to be indicted by ICC. If there is anything ivoriens won’t forgive Simon for is nothing but forcing her husband to cling unto power knowingly such a move would lead to mayhem as it subsequently happened.

Now that Simone is facing the charges as a wife and confidante of the president, will the seating presidents, their wives, families, friends and majordomos get it? Again, time will surely tell.

Source:The African Executive Magazine Jan.,2, 2013.

Wao wanakuza uchumaji sisi uchumi!

MTAALAM mmoja wa uchuma na uongo zii aitwaye Denjaman Chinga Mkapa alisema kuwa ukitaka kujua kuwa kaya yenu imeendelea angalia jinsi wachukuaji waitwao wawekezaji wanavyomiminika kwenye kaya yako na kuchuma na kuondoka.
Denjaman aliongeza kuwa kigezo kingine cha kukua kwa uchumi ni kwa kaya kuwa na uwezo wa kukopesheka na kusifiwa ujuha. Kwa misingi ya falasafa ya Chinga ni kwamba uchumi wa kaya yetu umekuwa kwa vile tumeweza kuongeza ukubwa wa uchumaji wetu kiasi cha deni la kaya kukua kama vile limelishwa hamira.
Taarifa za hivi karibuni za waziri wa Fedheha na Uchumaji, Willy Mgimwe zinasema kuwa deni la kaya limeongezeka toka dolari bilioni tatu mwaka 2007 hadi dolari bilioni 14.
Hili ni ongezeko la kujivunia la asilimia 400.
Hii ni kwa mujibu wa wataalamu wenzake kama vile Mzito Kabwela na Profwesa Harry Malipumba.
Mgimwe aliendelea kuwaambia walevi kuwa wasiwe na wasi wasi wala haraka ya kuhoji uongezekaji wa uchumaji kwa vile sirikali inawekeza kwenye miradi ya kiabunwasi ya maji, maziwa na nishati.
Kwa mujibu wa tafsiri yangu ya maneno ya Mgimwe ni kwamba, walevi wategemee mabomba yao ya maji kuanza kutoa maziwa huku nishati ikiendelea kupatikana hata kwenye miti.
Kwa maana hii, ndugu zangu chingas walistuka wakahoji kwanini wao waendelee kuuza nnazi wakati kule Bwagamoyo kwa wauza mnazi wao wauze wese toka Mnazi Bay? Wao wanataka wauze wese na jamaa zangu waendelee kujiuzia mnazi ilahi mkulu anatoka kwao. Jamani hii ni haki? Hayo tuyaache.
Ndoto ya Mgimwe ni nzuri sana hata kama ni ya kihekaya hekaya za Alfu Leila Uleila. Kinachofurahisha ni kwamba kweli walevi hawatahoji kwa vile wamelelewa kwenye misingi ya kuwaamini wakubwa wao hata kama wanajua wanachosema ni upuuzi na uongo ambao hata kuku hawezi kuukubali.
Kwa wanakaya wanaoona mbali, haya ni maendeleo makubwa ukiachia mbali yale tuliyofikia mwaka huu ambapo wanakaya wenzetu walitengeneza mishiko kiasi cha kufurisha mabenki yetu. Hivyo kulazimika kupeleka mafweza mengine kule Uswisi kwenye nchi ya vibaka inayotunza pesa ya kila kibaka duniani.
Wabongolala wanapaswa kumpongeza mkulu Njaa Kaya kwa kuwezesha mafanikio haya ambaayo ni ushahidi kuwa maisha bora kwa wao wote yanawezekana.
Viashiria vingine vya kukua kwa uchuma ni kudumaza uchumi na kukuza uchumaji. Ili kufanikisha hili, kaya lazima itumie sana ili kufanya pesa izunguke kaya na dunia nzima. Hivyo, wanaolalamika kuona bei za vitu vikipanda wanapaswa kukumbushwa kuwa hiki ni kiashiria cha maendeleo na kukuwa kwa uchuma.
Wasiojua kanuni za kukuza uchumaji na uchuma utawasikia wakimlaumu mkuu kwa kusema eti anazurura yeye na bibi yake wasijue hiyo ndiyo sera yake. Kama yeye na kibeti chake wanazurura kwani wamefunga barabara na viwanja vya ndege. Nanyi chumeni mkazurure ili mjue raha ya kufanya hivyo.
Mkulu amekuwa mbele pamoja na bi mkubwa wake kutembelea kaya zote duniani ili kutangaza mafanikio ya kukua kwa uchuma na uchumaji.
Juzi mzee mzima nilijaribu kuzurura kama mkulu. Nilikwenda zangu kule Ntwara nikalala Nanguruwe, asubuhi nikaenda zangu Nanyumbu, kabla ya kuelekea Tunduru maeneo ambako nilikula chakula changu cha mchana Nakapanya.
Nikiwa nakamata chamaki nchanga mjini Mtwara si wakaibuka mamia ya watu wakipinga eti gesi yao kuibiwa na kwenda kuuziwa Bwagamoyo. Walikuwa na kila aina ya vipeperushi. Nilivutiwa na kimoja kilichosema, “Njaa Kaya tafuta gesi ya Wakuere hii ya Ntwara ni ya wamakonde,”
Ukisikia kukua kwa uchuma na uchumaji chini ya sera ya Uhujumaa na Kujimegea ndiyo huku. Hawa wanachuma. Wale wanachumwa. Hawa wanakula. Wale wanaliwa. Na amani inaendelea kuwapo kila mtu akijiridhisha kuwa amefanya jambo la maana na la kimaendeleo.
Ingawa haipendezi kuwaeleza hivi walevi, ukweli ni kwamba watake wasitake wataliwa tu. Vinginevyo kama wanaweza nao waanze kuwala wale wanaowala wao. Bila kuamua kupambana wapo watakaoliwa milele na watakaokula milele.
Hivi nitumie lugha gani mnielewe enyi walevi wapumbavu? Mna macho lakini hamuoni, mna masikio lakini hamsikii. Hivi hamuoni wanene wanavvyoendelea kurithisha ulaji na unene kwa vitegemezi vyao? Mbona vimejazana kwenye mjengo na asasi nono nono nanyi bado mnakalia kulalamika?
Kwani hamuoni kinachoendelea kuwa kinalenga kuwala na kuwachuma maisha yenu yote nyinyi na vizazi vyenu? Haya shauri yenu. Ila kuna siku mtanikumbuka ingawa sitakuwapo.
Hakuna kitu kilinifurahisha kama kushuhudia matunda haya ya uchumaji na uchuma. Maana kila mtu anataka kuchuma hata kuchuma kwenyewe kama ni matokeo ya kumchuma mwenzie. Zaainzibaa walianza wakidai wese lao halifaidiwi na bara. Wao wanaona kufaidi vinono vya bara kama ulinzi, usalama, vyakula na hata kupata mahali pa kuzaliana kirahisi na kifahari kuliko wese lao kutumiwa na wabara.
Hapa kitaalamu tunatumia kanuni ya changu kichungu chako kitamu na changu changu na chako chetu. Chini ya kanuni kama hii,ufisi na ufisadi huzaliwa kiasi cha kaya kugawanyika vipande vipande kama ile mitandao maslahi ya chama cha Mitandao.
Turejee kwenye kukuza uchuma na kudumaza uchumi. Ili kukuza uchuma lazima uchumi uuawe au kutelekezwa. Katika kufanya hivyo mhusika huwekeza kwenye viini macho kama barabara ambazo hazifikii viwango na madudu mengine kama kukopa hovyo hovyo ili aweze ku-survive.
Essentially, this is the venue of lunatics and megalomaniacs who sees nothing except their tummies and massaburis. Such merry-andrews see no tomorrow and tomorrow for them is dangerous. Samahani, nimechonga kikameruni kuonyesha kuwa nimesoma kama yule waziri wa wanyama aliyehojiwa na kachangu fulani akamwaga uswangilishi ili kuficha uovu wake wa kufanya biashara ya utalii wakati ni waziri wa wizara hiyo. Nadhani brother Lazarus Nyalandudu unanipata pata kama siyo kunideku.
Kama tulivyoanza, tumalize na falsafa ya Denjaman itekelezwayo na Njaa Kaya. Gwiji Denja alisema kuwa ili kufanikisha kukua kwa uchuma na uchumaji, lazima kila maskini atumie mtaji wake ambao ni nguvu yake.
Hivyo, mnachopaswa kufanya maskini hapa, ni kuunganisha nguvu yenu na kuwakabili wale ambao nguvu yao ni yenu watuwala wanaowala na kuwatawala. Mmenielewa?
Du! Kumbe sijaaenda kuchuma ili nikuze uchuma! Leo bi mkubwa atanitambua lazima nichume kwake!
Chanzo; Tanzania Daima Januari 2, 2013

In Praise of Kanywaji!

          First of all, I'd like to wish Felix Sit Annus Novus or Happy New Year to all my readers.

In his famous book, In Praise of Folly, Desderius Erasmus wrote, “...prick up your ears and I'll tell you how many benefits I bestow on both men and gods, how widely my sacred powers extend.” Yeah. We need to tell gods the truth they don’t want to hear. Though, when we tell them in a light and right way, they’ll love it. This is my New Year’s resolution --- to unpack and hammer more agonizing stuff to those gods. Again, given that this is the hunk of boozers, it is the right thing to do.

Erasmus’ book made him famous especially after Johann Gutenberg discovered printing press in1450. With his quips and wits, Erasmus used to poke funs, puns, lampoons and innuendos into the mighty especially the kings and bishops (gods). Today, just like Erasmus, I’ll write about kanywaji which turns bibbers into politicians. Praising Kanywaji, instead of gods, makes people laugh at themselves before feeling pity and guilty of their own deeds. Actually, my work is to open the hidden world of gods. The difference though is: bibbers don’t tell lies like politicians. They only tell lies to liquor sellers when they want to loan booze and don’t suck anybody. They don’t abuse money but liquor.

As a votive bibber, I can tell you: there’s nowhere on earth we enjoy freedom like at the pub aka parliament. There, we feel protected just like MPs. If anything, drinking or talking is our ordnung (unchallengeable rule). Differently, we don’t receive kickbacks or sitting or lying allowance. We schmooze and feel like we’re wiser than Greek philosophers. We know what others don’t know. We love our art of Sipping just like politicians love corruption.

We don’t care about how people look at us. We know: they regard us losers while we actually are gainers. We don’t make mountains out of mole hills like politicos do. We’re not movers, shakers and rainmakers. Again, our discussions create fear in those thought to be smarter. We take on everybody coming our way. We’re not cowards and hypocrites. We speak our mind regardless whether it touches to the gods or angels.

Of concern is the mega theft that’s recently reported in the ministries of power, domestic and monkey business. Those who steal our monies are still in office. Presidenza andTakokuru would like to keep tabs on ‘em. Sadly, these creatures are so elusive. Presidenza and Takokuru don’t see them. They’re a government within another.CAG’s report always discloses mega theft. I no longer read CAG’s stuff for the fear of dying of heart attack. It is as if we’re manned by mad and mediocre people. Mark my words. Kanywaji makes bibbers edgier so as to see the unseen, say the unsayable and touch the untouchables. In a sense, kanywaji makes us brave and bold and optimize our ability to think.

I’m not trying to rat on anybody. There, recently, has developed very appalling hypocrisy. Known thieves have nowadays turned the Houses of God into ceremonial masquerade. They steal money from public and pretend to donate it to the development of the society especially the construction of Houses of God. Can devils and sinners build the house of God? What’s wrong with those who invite them? Aren’t they accomplices? Are they building the house of God or house of thieves? Nowadays, God has become a conduit for theft. It is sad that the so-called believers have allowed themselves to be taken for a ride by their thievish leaders.

Bibbers are absolutists when it comes to dealing with whatever anomaly. We know: people call us fyatus or the crazy ones. We pay no damn. Who is crazy? The bibber who tell the truth or those who tell lies even to themselves? Who is bloody crazy, imbibers who speak their minds openly or those who rob even unborn creatures? When you steal public money, you steal from everybody (those alive and those that will come thereafter). When you sell the hunk you sell the future. Does this need one to have a PhD to understand? Again, those guys, despite having their fake PhDs, don’t get it. They’ve eyes they don’t see and they’ve ears they can’t hear. How can they if at all they’re heartless and shameless? How many do you know? I’m contemplating about inviting Presidenza to booze so it can hone him. And once this is done, surely he’ll take on these creatures given that he once said that he has the lists of almost every criminal in the hunk. Believe me. Presidenza is a very serious man who fears nobody except nothing. The problem he faces is the lack of kanywaji.

Bibbers live simple and poor life. Thieves live complicated and controversial life. Bibbers only steal a little from their wives while big thieves steal from everybody. We steal peanut while they rob billions. Who’s a national calamity; the bibbers or the big connected thieves? Whom do you hate to love between the duo? To me, a wise bibber is better than a boorish king. The ant that builds a smart termite is better than an engineer who built a substandard skyscraper. Don’t we know? How many buildings are ticking bombs around Kariakoo? How many substandard roads have ever been constructed in our hunk? Aren’t engineers and officials behind these projects smaller than ants? Epicurus said, “It is folly for a man to pray to the gods for that which he has the power to obtain by himself.” Oh my! Oh my!

Source: Thisday Dec.,1-6, 2013.

Unafiki na ujambazi wa waingereza

Bila aibu yoyote nchi za   Magharibi haziachi kuwalaumu majambazi zilizowatengeneza kuibia Afrika. Tuna majambazi kama Jomo Kenyatta, Mobutu Seseseko, Jean-Bedel Bokassa, Felix-Heuphet Boigny, Moise Kasavubu na wengine wengi waliotengenezwa na mataifa ya magharibi na kuigeuza Afrika shamba la bibi.

Ni bahati mbaya kuwa hata baadhi ya vibaka hawa kufa au kuondolewa madarakani, Afrika imezalisha vibaka wengine wa kizazi hiki. Leo wakati tukimaliza mwaka tumeona lau tulete baadhi ya sura za unafiki na ujambazi wa mataifa ya magharibi yakiongozwa na mama yao Uingereza.

Habari njema Madiba atoka hospitali

Taarifa zilizotufikia kama zilivyorushwa na kituo cha habari cha eNCA ni kwamba rais wa kwanza wa Afrika Kusini Nelson Mandela Madiba ameruhusiwa kutoka hospitali ambako alikaa kwa siku 18. Wananchi wengi wa Afrika Kusini na dunia nzima walikesha wakimuombea apone haraka hasa wakati wa sikukuu za Noeli. Ni habari njema kwa wapenzi na mashabiki wa mzee Madiba. Kwa habari zaidi GONGA hapa.

Tathmini ya kufungia mwaka

NITAJE au nisitaje? Wajua? Mke wangu mama Kidume anamilki NGO ya MAWA ambayo imetuingizia fweza kiasi cha kuwa tajiri hata kuliko mimi mwaka huu.
MAWA licha ya kumuingizia bi mkubwa mshiko wa nguvu, imesaidia kupeleka huduma mbali mbali kama elimu na afya kwenye jimbo na mkoa wangu na ule wa bi mkubwa. Kwa kutumia jina la kaya tumeweza kusheheni huduma makwetu huku tukiwaacha walevi wakiparurana kwa ajili ya huduma hizi.
Hii inaitwa huduma ndani ya hujuma. Hata pesa ninayotumia kunywa gongo huwa mara nyingi inatokana na hii taasisi nyeti ya MAWA.
Mwanangu kidume naye hakubaki nyuma. Nimempitisha kiasi cha kuweza kugombea ulaji kwenye umoja wa vijana wa kijiwe. Kidume anayemiliki kampuni ya KUCK yaani Kidume Untachable Kid of Chief naye ametengeneza mshiko si kawaida.
Huwezi ukaamini hata yule mwanangu mlevi Milaji naye ni bilionea kwa sasa! Atashindwaje wakati dili zilikuwa za kumwaga? Kwanza ukiwa na ukuu kila kiumbe anakuabudia. Unaonekana kama malaika. Hata hivyo inabidi tuchukue chetu mapema tukijua fika kuwa ukuu ukituondokea waliokuwa wakituabudu.
Watatushit na kukimbilia watakaokuwa wamechukua nafasi yetu. Hivyo usishangae kusikia Mpayukaji amejitahidi kufanya kila kitu hasa ndani ya mwaka uliopita. Si haba. Nilipanua idadi ya nyumba ndogo zangu. Nyumba ndogo hamsini na saba na wanaharamu arobaini na wanne. Hata walevi walifuata mfano wa kiongozi wao kwa kukazana kuzaana na kuijaza kaya.
Haya ni matokeo ya sera bora ya mgao wa mameme ambao umewapa fursa ya walalanjaa kuzalisha wengine ili tuendelee kuwanyonya na hata kuwauza.
Hivyo wale waliokuwa wakilaumu miradi kama Kagodamn, HEPA, Richmonduli na Dowans washindwe na walegee.
Hawakujua tulipoianzisha tulilenga kuongeza idadi ya watu ili majirani zetu wasije kutuvamia na kutupiga hata kwa mingumi kwa kutumia wingi wa watu wao.
Pia mwaka huu ulikuwa ni mwaka mmoja tangu kusafirishwa kwa wanyama waliokuwa wakila majani na kuharibu mazingira.
Najua wengi walichonga kuwa tumeuza wanyama nje bila kujua kuwa tulikuwa tunawapunguza ili kuepusha uchafuzi na uharibifu wa mazingira.
Kwa kimombo hii inaitwa ecological equalization based on termination and elimination aimed at making billions for a cabal of swindlers and mightier thugs like us.
Kuonesha sayansi hii ya kuhamisha wanyama inavyopaswa kuwa sera ya taifa, tunamaliza mwaka kwa kuwa na mtaalamu wa kuhamisha nyara aitwaye Amdaraamani Kinamna kama mkuu wa chama. Pia katika safu za juu tumemrejesha mtaalamu wa mambo ya HEPA aitwaye Phil Mangura ili kwenye uchafuzi ujao atusaidie kutengeza mshiko mwingine kama ule uliotumika kutuingiza kwenye ulaji kwenye uchafuzi uliopita.
Ndugu walevi, ikumbukwe pia kuwa huu mwaka unaoisha ulikuwa ni mwaka wa kuwapa nguvu ndata.
Hii kwa kimombo huitwa empowerment and embarrassment of the criminals especially when those supposed to stop crime commit it at a very high magnitude.
Kutokana na kutaka ndata wawe na nguvu za kutisha ili walevi wawaheshimu, tuliwaruhusu kuua kila wanayeona ni tishio kwa ulaji wetu. Walianza na Mwangosi na kuendelea na wengine wadogo wadogo.
Ila katika utekelezaji wa empowerment yao kulitokea kitendo kinachopaswa kulaaniwa dunia nzima.
Wapiganaji wawili waliuawa kule Ngala. Hata hivyo, tutahakikisha waliotenda kitendo hiki ambacho hata Mungu hatakisamehe watasakwa wao wajukuu zao hata vitukuu na kuadhibiwa ili liwe somo kwa wengine.
Ndugu walevi, mtakumbuka kuwa mwaka huu mzee mzima na bi mkubwa wangu hatukuzurura kwenye vijiwe marafiki. Hii ni baada ya kusikia mkilalamika sana. Hivyo, kuonesha tunawaheshimu tulipunguza kuzurura.
Hivyo mwapaswa kunipigia makofi ili kunipa moyo wa kuendelea kuwasikiliza hata kama wakati mwingine nitawasikiliza na kuwapuuzia.
Ndugu walevi, hotuba yangu haiwezi kuisha bila kutaja mafanikio katika sekta ya pesa ambapo kaya yetu imefanikiwa kuingia kwenye kumi bora kwa kuwa na uchumi mzuri kiasi cha kuzalisha pesa nyingi hadi nyingine kukoswa pa kuiweka.
Hivyo, tuliamua ipelekwe Uswisi. Hii itasaidia kutangaza kaya yetu na kuweza kuvutia wachukuaji sorry wawekezaji.
Wapinzani wetu walijidai kutusingizia kuwa pesa hii ilifichwa kule kiwizi. Kwa kujua janja yao tuliwaanzishia kampeni chafu na ya kisayansi ambapo kinara wao bwana Willy Silaha tulimzushia kuwa ni mwanachama wetu.
Hivyo, badala ya walevi kuendelea kujadili mambo ya Uswisi walidakia hili la kadi nasi tukaendelea na mipango yetu ya kukuza uchumi kwa njia ya kuhamisha pesa ili isiwe nyingi na kufanya kila mtu kuwa nayo hivyo watu wakaacha kuzalisha.
Kitaalamu hii huitwa, financial relocation aimed at avoiding overflowing knock on effects.
Ndugu walevi, Mwaka unaoisha umeonesha mafanikio katika ujenzi wa mahekalu. Sasa hivi kaya yetu inaheshimika na kuogopwa kutokana na kuwa na mahekalu mengi yenye hata hadhi kuliko lile la Sagrada familia kule Barcelona.
Nadhani mlisikia watu kama Eze Maige wakitajwa kuangusha mijengo ya bei mbaya tena kwa kununua kasha kwa dolari. Huu ni ushahidi kuwa sera zetu zimeleta ufanisi hakuna mfano.
Pia kaya yetu imefanikiwa kujitangaza kimataifa. Kila wiki tumekuwa tukipokea ujumbe toka majuu ukituletea jezi za mipira kama alama ya kuonesha sisi ni wachezaji bora katika utawala. Hamkuona juzi pale kijiweni nilipoletewa jezi ya timu maarufu huko Ukamerunini iitwayo I have forgotten everything except fooling the mighty.
Wakati tukijiandaa kufunga mwaka, tunazidi kuwaahidi kuwa tutafanya maajabu mengi ili kuhakikisha tunaendelea kujulikana ulimwenguni. Kwa mfano, tumeazimia kukaribisha wawekezaji hata wachukuaji wengi ili kujulikana zaidi ulimwenguni. Tutapanua huduma zetu kwa kuwa wakarimu kwa wageni wetu. Tutazidi kuwapunguzia kodi huku tukizidisha mgao kwa walevi ili wazaane sana. Pia mwaka ujao tutaanzisha utaratibu wa kuyatibu mateja yaliyo maarufu. Hii ndiyo njia mujarabu ya kupambana na unga.
Badala ya kupambana na wauza unga unapambana na wala unga. Maana wanaouza hawaathiriki kama walaji. Wauza unga wanatajirika hivyo hakuna haja ya kuzuia watu kutajirika. Badala yake tutawaacha wauze. Sisi tutashughulikia kutibu mateja. Pia mwaka ujao tutaendelea kuwaenzi wasanii kwa kuwakaribisha kwenye pakuu pa pakuu ili kuwaingiza mkenge waendeleee kutupigia debe sisi na usanii wetu.
Kumbe leo ni boxing day! Acha niwahi nyumbani kufungua zawadi ili huyu mama asijenizidi ujanja.
Chanzo: Tanzania Daima Desemba 26, 2012.

Wakati mwingine tunatawaliwa na vichaa

Ben Ali na mkewe Leila Trabelsi
Nyumba ya Ben Ali rais wa zamani wa TunisiaGari la bei mbaya inasemekana alikuwa na zaidi ya 40.Mabunda ya noti cha kulala cha Ben AliNdege binafsi ya Ben Ali

Hii si peni bali ndege

Amangula, old wine in a new wineskin

Ee Kanwaji ee Kanywaji, I love you with all my heart. I truly love you Kanywaji. I adore you, however, not every Kanywaji. Warning: Never sing this song in the presence of the lady with whom you share bed and bedroom. The song above is my favourite especially after swallowing Kanywaji as I prepare myself to face my lioness back home where the first question is always, “How many women have you seduced,” I always answer none even if I've had just been skinned by small house. Today, I’m going to speak in prophetic parlance. "Penicillin cures, but wine makes people happy." Alexander Fleming (1881-1955). Again, is it all brands of wine that make people happy or is it just a perception? This is subject to debate. Today, I’ll go with the idea that wine makes people happy. Now that wine makes you happy, what transpired recently seems to dispute this assertion. When the ruining, sorry, ruling party invented a “new” brand of wine known as Amangula, we bibbers were neither moved nor amused. Even if we’re in love with kanywaji, weren't duped. How could we endorse an old type of wine just because it is in a brand new bottle? Did the maker think that we’d mistake of Amangula for Amarula? Yeah. For, before it’s launched, it used to rot in stores almost everywhere. Somebody tried to sell it in 2008. It was flatly refused. The swallowers in many pubs in Nyarukoro’s areas can nicely tell you how the said wine was neglected whenever it was advertised. Again, the winemaker Mr. Prof. Gwiji, Jake Kikweliquor of Common Con Manufacturers (CCM) Company assured himself that he’d brought a new stuff. To the bibbers, Amangula and Amasekwa are old illicit stuff which shouldn’t be in the pubs instead of historical books. Sadly, when this illicit liquor was launched in county of Bihawana Red, almost all vuvuzelas went wild praising it instead of cursing it. Again, are they trying to sell a pig in a poke or something? It baffles to note that this monkey business has been consuming a lot of money. After Amangula was launched, it’s been touring all regions of the hunk to entice the bibbers. It is put on the plane every now and then to be delivered to deaf and blind bibbers. I’m happy that such obnoxious and outdated wine is not served at our pub aka parliament. If anybody brings this toxic wine, I swear. He’ll get out with a bloody nose if not broken ribs or neck. How can they keep on fooling us even if we are bibbers? Along with Amangula is AmaKnana-another brand of old stuff otherwise presented as new. Did he think we’d mistake it for Cognac? Is there any difference between AmaKnana and Amakamba or Amakama? Who’s fooling whom in these ballyhoos of wine making? Do they think we've easily forgotten how these two brands helped mega thieves to rob our EPA money? If they've forgotten, we haven’t. We still remember vividly how these two brands of wine were instrumental in pilfering our dosh. We still know: they've been purposely re-introduced in the system so that they can intoxicate people. Thus, enhance another mega theft. Will they succeed this time around? Who knows? This is Bongolalaland where any megalomaniac crimes can be committed and those committing them get away with it. Again, icons like Dr. Willy Slaa will nary sip these illicit liquors. Methinks. These con-wine makers would have opted for Gongo in lieu of Amangula and AmaKnana. So too, they’d have made it known that gongo is not as illicit as their’ new’-old-illicit stuff. What drove Mr. Wine maker to re-invent old illicit stuff whereas he’d have invented new ones? Is it because his farm has all rotten grapes? Is it because his winery is getting old so as to lack supply and manpower? Maybe, he misunderstood the famous saying that wine improves with age. Again, the saying is, “Wine improves with age. The older I get, the better I like it.” Didn’t Mr. Wine maker know that life is too short to drink bad wine? Many thinkers, especially imbibers, still wonder why the man went for old stuff such as Amangula and AmaKnana while there are new brands such as Amapepe of Mape. Again who wants to mix wine with bhang? Why reinventing stuff like Amamegheji while there are other brand new stuff? It is sad to note that even young people with such sharp eyes are succumbing to such old stuff. I didn't hear them oppose the move that fools and feeds them old stuff. Were they duped by the new bottle? Are the youths going to rebel or are waiting to fulfill the prophecy? It was said, “Gentlemen, in the little moment that remains to us between the crisis and the catastrophe, we may as well drink a glass of champagne.” Paul Claudel (1868-1955). Do they know that what is to come for CCM is nothing but demise? Is it because of power or intoxication that makes them dull and passive or abracadabra? If the in-thing were old wine, if I were he who faked the wine, I’d have gone for chateau Lafite if not Mouton Rothschild or Romanee Conti. Again, reinventing Amangula and AmaKnana is but a joke of the year. Anyways, maybe, this is the way the guys want us to lapse the year --- with scandalous flapdoodle otherwise called invention. "Good wine needs no bush," William Shakespeare. Source: Thisaday Dec.,24-30, 2012.

Madudu haya yangefanywa na serikali hali ingekuwaje duniani?

1. 
   
   
   Wahafidhina nchini Mali wamekuwa wakibomoa majengo ya kihistoria. Ni majengo yanayoonyesha jinsi Uislam ulivyoingia Afrika miaka mingi iliyopita. Ni bahati mbaya kuwa wanaobomoa majengo haya nao wanajiita waislam. Je madudu haya yangefanywa na serikali tungeshuhudia maandamano kiasi gani duniani? Kwa habari zaidi tafadhali GONGA hapa.

Ni ushindi wa Mahakama na Lema

Kurejeshewa ubunge kwa mbunge wa Arusha Mjini Godbless Lema ni ushindi mkubwa kwa demokrasia na kurejeshwa heshima ya mahakama. Baada ya kesi yake kukumbwa na mizengwe, ubazazi, upendeleo hata kupinda sheria, hatimaye mahakama imeamua kurejesha heshima yake kwa kukataa kutumiwa kama nepi na wanasiasa uchwara wasiopenda demokrasia. Tunachukua fursa hii kuipongeza mahakama na Lema na CHADEMA kwa kutetea na kulinda demokrasia. Alluta Continua!

Kwanini rais wetu anakuwa kituko kila uchao?

Rais Jakaya Mrisho Kikwete akipokea jezi toka kwa mmiliki na Mwenyekiti wa Klabu ya Ligi Kuu ya Uingereza, Sunderland, Bw. Ellis Short huku Makamu mwenyekiti wa Klabu hiyo Bw. David Milliband na Mkurugenzi wa Masoko wa klabu hiyo Bw. John Farnan wakiangalia bada ya mkutano wa na Rais Ikulu jijijni Dar es salam leo.

Wabunge wababaishaji sasa wachapwe bakora

BAADA ya mnywa kahawa mmoja fyatu ambaye zamani alikuwa memba wa kijiwe chetu kuja na mpya kuwa wahishimiwa wabungwe warambwe bakora kama wataboa, kijiwe kimekaa kama kamati na kupendekeza adhabu nyingine kwa watakaofanya madudu.
Dk. Mgosi Machungi anaingia na gazeti la Tz Ever. Hata hasalimii. Analianzisha, “Wagoshi, kwei sasa nimeamini kuwa mapinduzi yanaanza kunukia,”
Dk Mbwa Mwitu anadakia, “Dk Mgosi, hata salamu hakuna! Inaonekana hii imekuingia sana. Maana salamu zako ni mapinduzi uliyo nayo kichwani mwako,”
Dk. Mbwa tiheshimiane, imeniingia nini hiyo. Acha kunishongeza kwa waheshimiwa uulize ninachomaanisha,” Anampa Mbwa Mwitu nakala ya gazeti la Tz Ever ili ajioneee kilichomsibu.
Mbwa Mwitu analipokea gazeti kwa haraka haraka ikichukuliwa kuwa kijiweni wanunuzi wa magazeti si wengi.
Kusoma kichwa cha habari tu anasita na kusema, “Kweli Mgosi ulikuwa na haja ya kutosalimia na kuhemkwa. Yaani huyu mama anataka eti wahishimiwa wa mjengoni warambwe bakora wakiboa! La illah ill-allah!”
Wakati akishangaa Dk Mipawa anadakia, “Unashangaa nini? Mbona pendekezo zuri tu. Kama wao walitunga sheria ya kuwapiga wengine bakora kwanini wao wasipigwe iwapo wote ni wana kaya na tuko sawa?
Mie napendekeza zaidi. Hata kama mkuu akifanya madudu kama ilivyo naye arambwe bakora. Mbona mzee Mchonga alimraba bakora waziri Fundukura wakati alipotuhumiwa kupokea mlungula? Unadhani leo angekuwa mkuu si wengi wangevimba makalio.”
Kijiwe hakina mbavu.
Wakati tukiwa tunavunjika mbavu, Dk Mpemba alinyaka mic na kulonga, “Mie nansapoti sana huyu mama. na kama angekuwa hajaolewa mie ningemuoa ili ajenshauri jinsi ya kukomboa watu wetu.”
Mpemba anaendelea, “Mie naona viboko havitoshi ati. mbona Uchina wapiga risasi bila kujali ukubwa wa cheo cha ntu? Kama siyo kutawaliwa na vibaka, wanafiki na wehu tungekuwa tunapiga risasi wanaoibia umma hasa mafisadi,”
Dk Kapende hangoji, “Leo Dk Mpemba umenikuna sina mfano,” Kabla ya kuendelea Dk Mchunguliaji anaingilia, “Dk Kapende hiyo lugha kaka. Amekukuna wapi na vipi?” Kapende anacheka na kusema, “We unaona wapi na vipi?”
Profesa Msomi Mkatatamaa ameishaanza kuhisi utani unaweza kuvuruga mada. hangojei Kapende ajibiwe. Anakatua mic, “Waheshimiwa tukubaliane. Kuna haja ya kuwa na katiba yenye meno badala ya hili gunia lenye kila matundu ya ujambazi tulilo nalo. Hivi kwa mfano wahishimiwa wanaosinzia au kuongopa mjengoni unategemea wafanywe nini?”
Hangoji ajibiwe. Anaamua kujijibu mwenyewe, “Mie naona wangechapwa bakora kabla ya kupewa adhabu nyingine kama kufukuzwa uheshimiwa na kutakiwa warejeshe nusu ya mishahara waliyolipwa. Pia kuna majambazi wa kielimu ambao wamo mjengoni kwa vyeti vya kughushi.
Ingekuwa si heshima yangu kwa haki za binadamu, hawa ningeshauri wavuliwe nguo na kurambwa bakora kabla ya kupigwa mawe na hatimaye kuchomwa moto,”
“Profesa huna haja ya kuhofia haki za binadamu. Mafisadi si binadamu bali binsheitwani Audhubillillahi minna shaitwan rajiim,” Anadaki Dk Madevu.
“Hapana. Ni binadamu. Hivyo, kwa vile kaya yetu haijaondoa adhabu ya kunyotoa roho, tunaweza kuwanyonga tena baada ya kuwavisha suti na kuwapa mlo mzuri ilmradi watokomee na kuwa somo kwa wengine,”
Akiwa anakunywa kahawa yake ili aendelee kutoa pwenti ndata kama watatu hivi walipita wakiwa na bunduki zao. Nadhani ni wale wasio na kazi bali kuzurura mitaani na likitokea tukio la ujambazi hasa wa kutumia silaha wanakimbia na silaha zao.
Mpemba anawaona na kuongea kwa sauti ya chini, “Mie naona na hawa ndata nao wapaswa kupigwa bakora na kuchomwa moto kwa wanavyoua watu siku hizi. Maana mie sasa naogopa wao kuliko hata hayo majambazi,”
Kila mtu anageuka kuangalia ndata wakipita bila hata kujali kuwa kuna watu walikuwa wakiwananga.
Mipawa anasema, “Nao siku yao ya kuonja wanachofanya ipo karibu. Hamkusikia huko Ngala ambako nasikia wawili walinyotolewa roho baada ya kumnyotoa mtu asiye na hatia roho! Taratibu tutafika tu ilmradi kila mtu amheshimu mwenzake bila kujali nyadhifa wala kipato,”
Msomi amepata upenyo anarejesha mada kwenye mstari. Anasema, “Mie vitani huwa sihangaishwi na mbwa bali aliyemfuga. Hao ni viumbe wadogo sana wasiwahangaishe. Tuhangaike na hawa walioishiwa wanaopenda kuitwa wahishimiwa kama wezi wa miwa.
Nirejee kwenye kilichoandikwa na gazeti kuhusu kuwapiga bakora wahishimiwa. Ni wazo zuri hasa ikizingatiwa kuwa litatoa somo na fundisho kwa wengine.
Hivi wapuuzi kama Badworse aliyenaswa akipokea rushwa au wale wanaotuhumiwa kuomba rushwa kwenye halmashauri za wilaya ni vibaya kuwapiga bakora tena hadharani? Hivi wale wanaojigeuza makuwadi wa makampuni ya uchukuaji kwa vile wanapewa vijidole vichache tukiwakata vichwa tutakuwa tumekosea?”
Dk Machungi hajivungi. Anakatua mic, “Poofesa mie nakuunga mkono. Sioni haja ya kuwanea huuma majizi kama akina Endeea Chenge au Eddie Owassa ambao mazambi yao yametisababishia mgao wa umeme. Mie hawa natamani kuwapiga zongo hadi wabebe mimba,”
Wanakijiwe wamamshangilia utadhani kafunga goli kweli. Mgosi Machungi kusifiwa hivyo kaamua kuendelea, “Hivi mtu kama Azao Nyaandu kwei akipewa mimba itakuwa ni kumuonea? Timesikia anavyomiika kampuni ya utaii wakati yeye ni wazii wa utaii.”
“We mgosi achia hapo,” Anaingilia Mbwa Mwitu.
Walevi hatuna mbavu kwa jinsi Mgosi alivyoamua kuwatia mimba wanaume bila kujali lolote.
Baada ya profesa Msomo Mkata tamaa kuona watu wote wameshikilia kucheka, aliamua kurejea na kula mic, “Mgosi umesema kweli ingawa hili la mimba sijui litawezekanaje. Kweli kama hii ya huyu waziri wa wanyama kuwa na kampuni ya kuchuuza wanyama si kinyaa jamani?
Nashangaa bado mkuu atakuja na kujichekeshachekesha bila kumwajibisha mshikaji wake. Hivi hawa watu huwa wanampa nini huyu bwana jamani? Nina wasi wasi wasije kuwa makuwadi wa biashara yake na jamaa zake au hata washirika. Vinginevyo upuuzi kama huu ungemuondoa mtu dakika ile ile ulipofumka,”
Kijiwe kikiwa kimekolea si gari la Nyaranyalandu likapita. Tulilitupia mimawe kama hatuna akili nzuri. Kama siyo wale polisi kuingilia, huenda jamaa angekuwa ima maiti au mjamzito wa mingumi yetu. Eti leo ni Jumatano? Kachape kazi siyo mkeo.
Chanzo: Tanzania Daima Desemba 19,2012.
 

Tuna rais mwingine ke!

Taifa la Korea Kusini limeandika historia baada ya kuchagua rais mwanamke wa kwanza tangu kuundwa kwa taifa hili. Rais mteule Park Gyeun-hye anaingia kwenye vitabu vya historia kuwa rais wa kwanza mwanamke kwenye taifa  hili. Je Gyeun-hye ni nani? Tafadhali GONGA hapa kwa habari zaidi.

Uhalisia wa serikali yetu