Mlevi kumpa vidonge mke wa munene

Mke wa rais Janet Magufuli :Hapa Magabacholi wameishamdaka

Kawaida sina tabia ya kupenda kuwa karibu na wanene, wake zao au hata marafiki zao. Huwa naogopa kuonekana najigonga kama wale wanaojigonga kutetea au kutafuta ulaji. Ulevi wangu unanitosha; nimeridhika nao. Ndiyo maana–hata walevi waliopinighasi nigombee urahis na ulaji rahisi niliwatolea nje. Pia huwa sina tabia ya kuwazimia bi wakubwa wa wanene wala kuwashobokea. Ili iweje; wakati bi mkubwa wangu mama Kidume ananitosha?
            Baada ya kuona namna mambo yanavyokwenda–kiasi cha kuanza kuharibika kama si kuzusha wasi wasi na shaka–nimeamua kuvunja mwiko na kuomba kukutana na mke wa mnene ambaye wengi hupenda kumuita bi mkubwa namba moja utadhani munene ana nyumba ndogo au ana mpango wa kuoa mke mwingine.
            Juzi juzi nikiwa zangu Ntwara njini nikipata chamaki nchana na nkojo. Ghafla bi vuu si nikaona bi mkubwa wa murume akipokelewa uwanja wa ndege kama rahis kwa vile ni anachangia uchago na bwana mkubwa. Kwanza, nilijiuliza; nani alimpigia kura ya kula huyu? Sikuamini kuwa Jeni angepoteza muda kutoa misaada kwa wazee walevi ambayo ingeweza kutolea na akina Jeni Muhangama munene wa wizara husika.  Pili, machele yanicheza nikasukuti na kujiuliza: huyu bi mkubwa kapata wapi nshiko wa kuwakumbuka waliosahaulika hivi? Je kuna anachotafuta? Je anataka kuwatumia au anatumika?  Baada ya kukosa majibu, niliamua kujiandaa kumkabili. Zamu hii nitamkabili na si kumuandikia waraka kama nilivyofanya kwa bi mkubwa mfanyabiashara ya asasi zisizo za kiraia wala kijeshi Salmia Njaa Kaya Kitwitwi ambaye nilimtwanga barua kali alipotangaza kuwa makao makuu ya NGO yake ni ikuu.
            Baada ya kukutana na zali la mentali kwa wazee wa Ntwara, kwanza nilidhani huu ni wema tu wa kawaida ambapo mke wa mwenye ulaji alikuwa ameamua kuwasaidia wakongwe hawa waliopigika. Kilichonistua ni habari kuwa kumbe misaada aliyokuwa anamwaga bi mkubwa ilikuwa imetolewa na wafadhili tena matapeli toka Afrika Magharibi kwenye kaya inayosifika kwa utapeli wa kiroho na kimwili. Sijui kama bi mkubwa huyu alijiuliza namna ya hawa wanaomshobokea walivyochanga njuluku wanazomwagia hadi kuwazimia na kuwasifu hata kuwapa majina matukufu. Je walikuwa wapi; na kwanini wamchangamkie leo baada ya murumewe kuukwaa ulaji? Je kwanini asiwaambie hawa wenye mapenzi mema waelekeze hiyo misaada kwa wizara husika kama hakuna namna?
            Hakuna kitu kiliniacha hoi kama kusikia kuwa mmoja wa wafadhili waliomwagia bi mkubwa misaada ni Mnigeria. Kwanini huyu kidhabu asiwasaidie wanigeria aje kuwanea uchungu wabongo kama hakuna namna?
            Lazima niseme ukweli; simzimii huyu bi mkubwa. Ninayemzimia ni mzee wake ambaye ana tabia kama zangu; si mwoga wala mbabaishaji kama wale vilaza aliowarithi. Kwanza, nafahamu kuwa bi mkubwa–tokana na elimu yake kiduchu–anaweza kurubuniwa kirahisi kama mtangulizi wake ambaye alikuwa akijaribu kubukanya kimombo anatoa jasho utadhani amekwea mlima Kilimanjaro. Hivyo, hoja yangu ya kwanza kwake–tutakapofanikiwa kukutana–ni kumpa laivu kuwa akapige shule badala ya kukimbizana na njuluku.
            Pili, nitamtonya akiendelea na spidi hii–licha ya kuingizwa mkenge na kutumiwa na matapeli –atamchafulia mrume wake. Naongea kutokana na uzoefu nilioupata toka kwa Anna Tamaa Makapi Ben Tunituni mzee wa uvivu wa kufikiri nyodo na kujitwalia mimali ya walevi hasa ile ya Kiwila.
            Tatu, nitampa laivu kuwa walevi wanachukia hizi NGO za ulaji na za uongo na ukweli zenye kutaka kuwatumia waliopigika kujipatia ukwasi wa haraka. Nitamshauri aangalie Anna Tamaa na murumewe wanavyoishi kwa kuogopa na kukimbia vivuli vyao kiasi cha kustuka usingizini wanapotajiwa jina la munene ambaye anaonekana hana nchezo na vibaka wawe wakubwa hata wadogo. Humuoni wale vibaka wanene na wanono wanavyokimbilia ikuu kila mara kupoza mambo ili wasiishie kunyea debe?
            Nne, nitampasha kuwa akiona hawa wanaomchekea na kumzimia asidhani wanamzimia yeye zaidi ya kigoda alichokalia murumewe; wakishatimka toka ikuu wanabakia makapi ambayo hata waandishi wa umbea hawayataki. Nani leo–kwa mfano anaweza kupoteza muda na nafasi ya chombo chake cha habari–kumfuata bi mkubwa wa Njaa Kaya kwenda kupata habari zake? Ni mwandishi gani aliyeishiwa kama kanjanja anaweza kumhoji Anna Tamaa leo zaidi ya kuwinda habari zake mbaya ili kumuanika? Maisha ya ustaafu huwa karaha; na siyo raha ukiondoka ukiwa na mizigo ya kashfa tena zitokanazo na kutoona mbali, tamaa na upuuzi mwingine. Nitamwambie aone bi mkubwa wa mzee Mchonga anavyoendelea kutesa tokana na kujitenga na ufanya biashara ikuu. Jamani, kuna maisha baada ya kustaafu.
            Kwa vile sijapewa appointment ya kukutana na bi mkubwa huyu, sitamaliza yote ninayokwenda kutoa moyoni kwake. Cha mno ni kwamba walevi wamenituma nimpe kavukavu kuwa hawapendi tena NGO ya bi mkubwa wa murume kwa vile zilizopita ziliwatumia na kuwatajirisha vidhabu waliojifanya kuwajali kumbe wanatafuta miradi yao uchwara.
            Nimalize kwa kusema ukweli–maana msema kweli ni mpenzi wa Mungu–kuwa sitaki kuona bi mkubwa wa munene akijiingiza kwenye kufanya biashara pale Magogoni wala kuruhusu pageuka pango la wezi na matapeli kwenda kupiga dili kama ilivyokuwa.
Tuonane nikitoka kumpa vitu vyake bi mkubwa wa munene Kanywaji.
Chanzo: Nipashe Jumamosi.

Nasi tujiandae kuwachunguza marais wetu

            Ingawa hili linaweza kuonekana kama jambo la ajabu–hata wengine kudhani ni kushikana uchawi–taifa letu linapaswa kuenga kila kona ili kuhakikisha mageuzi ya kweli anayolenga kuyafanya rais John Pombe Magufuli yanafanikiwa kwa haki na usawa. Hadi tunaandika, kuna maafisa wengi wa umma wameishatumbuliwa majipu tokana na ima utendaji wao au historia ya utendaji wao. Pia wapo ambao hawakutarajiwa walioachwa nje ya serikali yake. Kadhalika, wapo ambao hawakutarajiwa wala kufaa wamo kwenye serikali yake.

            Hivi karibuni nchini Brazil walianza safari ya kujisafisha ili kuweza kusonga mbele. Kwa kuanzia, walimsimamishakazi ili kumchunguza rais wao Dilma Rousseff ambaye kwa sasa anapambana vikali kusafisha jina lake na kurejea madarakani.

            Nigeria ilifuatia; kwa kumchunguza rais mstaafu Goodluck Jonathan ili kuweka mambo sawa. Israel walikwenda mbali hadi kumchunguza mke wa waziri mkuu aliyeko madarakani, Sarah Netanyahu kwa kashfa ya kutumia fedha za umma kununulia samani kwenye nyumba yao binafsi.

Kutokana na madudu ambayo rais John Pombe Magufuli amekuwa akilalamikia, kuna haja ya kuchunguza marais wote waliopita bila kuwasaza na wale wa Visiwani. Inabidi ieleweke; kutaka kuchunguza marais waliopita siyo kuwahukumu kabla ya kupatikana na hatia. Wala nao wasiwe na wasi wasi kama wanajua hakuna baya walilotenda hasa utumiaji vibaya madaraka.

            Mifano miwili ya Brazil na Nigeria ni ya kuigwa. Mfano wa tatu wa Israel unafaa sana hasa ikizingatiwa kuwa kuna wanafamilia wa marais waliopita ambao wametokea kuwa matajiri kwa sababu wazazi au waume zao walikuwa madarakani. Tuchunguze Asasi Zisizo za Kiserikali (NGO) walizoanzisha wake wa marais wetu waliopita kwa ajili ya kujipatia utajiri kwa kisingizio cha kuwasaidia akina mama na wasichana wakati kuna wizara maalumu kwa ajili hiyo. Tuchunguze hata washirika na marafiki wa viongozi wetu. Wala tusiwaonee aibu; kama leo–kwa mfano–rais Magufuli anawatumbua majipu watumishi wa umma, kwanini nasi tusiwachunguze marais waliopita hasa ikizingatiwa walikuwa watumishi wa umma. Hakuna aliyeko juu ya sheria wala hakuna anayeweza kuaminika kwa sababu tu alikuwa rais au alikuwa na madaraka makubwa serikalini au chamani.

            Kuwachunguza viongozi wastaafu kuna faida kadhaa:

Mosi, kutawaondolea shutuma ambazo zimekuwa zikiendelea kichinichini au wazi wazi dhidi yao. Pili, kutawaumbua wale waliotenda uovu ili uwe mfano kwa wengine wajao. Tatu, kutarejesha maadili ya uwajibikaji. Nne, kutajenga dhana kuwa hakuna aliyeko juu ya sheria. Tano, kutaondoa ufisadi ulioanza kuzoeleka ambapo madaraka ya umma hugeuzwa mali ya familia.

            Karibu kila rais mstaafu–isipokuwa marehemu baba wa taifa Mwl Julius Nyerere–ana kile waingereza huita skeletons in the closet. Kwa mfano, rais wa awamu ya pili Ali Hassan Mwinyi aliondoka na kashfa ya Loliondo ambapo sehemu ya mbuga ya taifa iliuzwa kwa waarabu kinyemela jambo ambalo liliendelea kumuandama hata miaka zaidi ya 20 tangu aondoke madarakani. Rais wa awamu ya tatu, Benjamin Mkapa naye hakunusurika. Ana kongwa zake kama vile kujitwalia Machimbo ya Makaa ya Mawe ya Kiwira, ubinafsishaji wa kijambazi na kuruhusu mkewe kuwa na kampuni almaaruf NGO ambayo aliitumia kijipatia utajiri wenye kutia shaka.

            Rais mstaafu Jakaya Kikwete ndiyo usiseme. Hata kabla ya kuingia madarakani alishahusishwa na kashfa ya EPA iliyotokomeza mabilioni ya shilingi zote fedha za umma. Akiwa madarakani, licha ya kuzembea kwenye usukani, kuzurura na kutumia vibaya fedha za umma na madaraka, Kikwete anasifiki kama rais ambaye unaweza kumuita ajali ya kisiasa kwa taifa letu. Funga kazi ya Kikwete ni pale alipoondoka madarakani akiwa ameacha kashfa zenye kuzamisha mabilioni ya shilingi za umma kama vile Escrow na UDA ambazo karibu zote ima zinamhusisha yeye au watu wake wa karibu.

     Mwanahalisi online (11 Novemba 2014) ilikuwa na haya ikimhusisha Kikwete na kashfa ya Escrow. “Kampuni hii ya PAP iliyopewa tuzo hiyo ya 400bn kwa kuwekeza 6mTsh tu ni ya nani? Kwa mujibu wa nyaraka za BRELA, 50% inililiwa na Singh Sethi (singasinga) na mwanae na asilimia 50% zinamilikiwa na kampuni ya Simba Trust ya Australia.”

Mwanahalisi online iliongeza, “Simba trust ni nan.? Uchunguzi umeonesha kuwa Simba trust ya Australia inamilikiwa na watu wawili ambao ni salima Kikwete na Miraji Kikwete.” Nao mtandao mkubwa wa kijamii kuliko yote Tanzania, Jamii Forums (28 Januari 2015) haukuachwa nyuma kumfichua Kikwete. Kwani uliandika, “Taarifa zinasema, familia ya Rais Kikwete imepata zaidi ya Sh. 9 bilioni, kutoka katika mgawo wa fedha zilizohifadhiwa katika akaunti ya Escrow.”

            Nalo gazeti la Dira ya Mtanzania la Novemba 30–7 Desemba 2015 halikuachwa nyuma katika kuiunganisha familia ya Kikwete na kashfa ya UDA. Kichwa cha habari ongozi kwenye gazeti hili kilisomeka, “UDA kutua kwa Magufuli, yabainika ilitwaliwa bila malipo, Ridhiwani Kikwete ahusishwa.”

            Kwa uchache ni kwamba huo mnyumbulisho wa madudu ya watawala wetu waliopita ni jipu tena lenya kansa, kubwa na linalonuka ukiachia mbali kutishia mustakabali wa taifa letu.

            Tumalizie na tulikoanzia; tukihimiza kuwa ipo haja ya kuchunguzana ili kuweka mazingira ya uwajibikaji sawa na wa kweli baina yetu tayari kwa kusonga mbele. Naomba kuwasilisha hoja. Viongozi wetu wala wasiwe na wasiwasi kama wao si majipu wala magamba.

Chanzo: Mseto, leo.

Kijiwe chashinikiza posho ya makalio ifutwe

            Baada ya bi mdogo yule ambaye hajaTulia kuja na mpya kuwa atawanyima wahishimiwa wa upingaji posho za makalio kwa vile makalio yao hayakai kwenye makochi ya Mjengoni na kuwezesha masikio kusikia mipasho ya akina Lushindo na wengine, Kijiwe kinataka–kama mbaya mbaya–posho ya makalio iondolewe. Kwani tishu za chooni na maji yanatosha.

            Mpemba leo ndiye analianzisha, “Yakhe memsikia eti huyu bibie asiyeTulia ataka kukata posho za makalio ya wahishimiwa wa upingaji? Kwani yeye makalio yake yalani kiasi cha kutaka kukata posho za makalio ya wenzake?”

            “We unashangazwa na kukatwa hizi posho za masaburi siyo! Huyu bi mdogo apaswa kutulizwa; kwani wapingaji mbona walitaka tangu zamani posho za makalio ziondolewe hasa ikizingatiwa kuwa makalio hayapaswa kulipwa posho,” anachomekea Mbwamwitu huku akitabasamu. Anaendelea, “Mwenzenu leo naomba mnivumilie tena sana tu. Kwani nitachonga na kuronga sana japo si kawaida yangu. Hebu jiulizeni; kama makalio yanalipwa posho, hiyo miguu, mikono, macho na mdomo vitalipwa nini? Nadhani hii nayo ni aina ya ufisadi iliyohalalishwa waliozoea kuharamisha vya halali na kuhalalisha haramu.”

            Mipawa anakula mic, “Nkwingwa nakubaliana nawe. Hawa wanaolipwa posho za makalio inaonekana wanawakilisha matumbo na makalio yao na si wachovu kama wanavyodai. Sasa nimegundua! Kumbe ndiyo maana wengi wao wana matumbo na makalio makubwa! Ni kwa sababu makalio yao yanalishwa kwa posho ya wanuka jasho. Je na huko ulaya watasha hulipa posho kwa makalio yao au vichwa tu?”

            Mijjinga anakwapua mic, “Bheng’we kweli leo umenifikirisha na kukukubali kama daktari na si kilaza kama wale watoto wa chuo cha UdoM. Sasa naweza kujua ni kwanini mjengo uligeuzwa sehemu ya mipasho. Unategemea nini makalio yanapolipwa posho yakashiba na kuumka kama siyo kutoa mipasho tena yenye harufu chafu?”

            ‘Una maana jamaa wanatumia sana masaburi sana kuliko vichwa siyo; ndiyo maana wanaongoza kwa kuwa mjengo wenye mipasho kila wanapokutana ukiachia mbali kutimuana na kususana?” anauliza Mchunguliaji. “Kumbe sasa! Unauliza chooni kunanuka nini katika mambo ya kimakaliokalio kama haya siyo? Hebu jiulize swali jepesi. Anatokea muishiwa tena wa kuteuliwa na kuwania Umicrophone na anapata unategemea nini? Vingetumika vichwa na siyo makalio kilaza kama huyu anayetegemea kubebwa kibaby baby asingekubaliwa kugombea wala kupewa ulaji mkubwa kama huu unaopaswa kushikwa na wasotaji,” anajibu  Mipawa.

            Msomi Mkatatamaa aliyekuwa akisikiliza kwa makini anakula mic,”Dokta Mipawa usinikumbushe mambo ya vilaza na kaya iliyokuwa ya vilaza. Hivi unategemea nini makalio yanapolipwa posho? Lazima mwenye makalio ataishia kuwa kilaza kwa vile hana haja ya kujihangaisha hasa ikizingatiwa kuwa analipwa posho nyingi hadi makalio yake yanalipwa. Kiumbe wa namna hii hatakuwa na motisha wala haja ya kutumia bongo kufikiri hata awe na PhD kama sisi. Hivyo, msishangae yanayoendelea mjengoni. Shibe mwana malevya jamani; hasa ulevi wenyewe unapokuwa wa madaraka. Kama watu wangeamua kutumia vichwa kufikiri badala ya makalio basi hii posho ya makalio ingepelekwa mashuleni ambako hali ni mbaya. Kama kulipa posho ya makalio ni dili basi walipwe wanafunzi wanaokaa chini hadi makalio yao yanauma kama siyo walimu wanaosimama hadi makalio yanauma.”

            Kanji anakwanyua mic, “Dugu yangu, kama kalio nalipwa juruku kuba mimi iko gombea ingia jengoni ili kalio yangu ipate posho. Kama laza kama ile nasaidia Mr Microphone pewa guvu kuba namna hii lazima yeye iende jengoni na kujenga kalio yake kama vao nafanya.” Kijiwe hakina mbavu jinsi Kanji anavyopania kwenda kujenga makalio yake.

Wakati tukiangua vicheko Kanji anaendelea, “Veve cheka! Mimi fika jengoni taka na posho ya roho, sikio, moyo, na kila kitu yanguni.”

            Mbwamwitu anarejea, “Kanji nawe kumbe unatamani kutumia makalio kufikiri ili ulipwe posho ya makalio siyo! Halo halo! Ama kweli Bongo kweli bongolalaland alijisemea profesa Mpayukaji! Sijui kama ingekuwa Bombei mswahili angefikiria hata kwenda kufikiri kwa kichwa kwenye mjengo wa magabacholi wanaotuita sisi abusii au manyani!” ananiangalila huku akitabasamu tokana na kunipa ujiko wa kuwa mwanafalsafa aliyeita Bongo Bongolalaland.

            Kabla ya kuendelea nami nachomekea, “Ngojeeni Makalioland inakuja siku si nyingi kama siyo Tulieworld.”

            Kanji leo kapania kusema; anakula mic, “Kweli mimi jua kuwa hindi kule Bombei na nyingine hapa jumbani naitwa Swahili jina baya; lakini siyo mimi. Mimi na nyinyi iko dugu moja tena kuba sana dugu yangu. Hapana ona nakuja kunya gahawa hapa kila siku?” anajitetea.

            Sofia Lion aka Kanungaembe ameamua kutia guu, “Jamani hawa watu wa mjengoni watukwaza sisi wanuka jasho. Hivi kweli hii ni haki kulipana posho ya makalio wakati umaskini ukiendelea kutukalia sisi bila sababu zaidi ya uroho wao? Nadhani; tufanye mpango tuandamane hadi kwa Dokta Kanywaji kumueleza kilio chetu na namna tunavyopinga makalio kulipa posho. Mie nilidhani ni makalio na manonihino ya vyangudoa yanayolipwa tena siyo kwa kukaa bali kushughulishwa. Hili nalo ni jipu kama yule wa kutulia.”

            Kijiwe kikiwa kinanoga si likapita shangingi la kidhabu Tuliya. Acha tulimwagie kahawa kabla ya kutaka kumtoa nje na kumramba vibao.

Chanzo: Tanzania Daima, Jumatano

Watanzania hakikisha mnamlinda Magufuli

            Rais John Pombe Magufuli amesikika mara nyingi akiomba watanzania wamuombee. Hii ni kutokana na ugumu na hatari ya kazi na mambo anayofanya. Bila shaka, Magufuli anajua hatari inayomkabili kama kiongozi na kama binadamu. Hivyo, kuonyesha wasi wasi si jambo la kushangaza wala kuchanganya. Anajua fika yaliyowakuta waliojaribu anayofanya mmojawapo akiwa marehemu Edward Moringe Sokoine, waziri mkuu wa zamani aliyekufa kwenye mazingira tatanishi tokana na msimamo wake wa kuchukia maovu hasa ufisadi. Pia, Magufuli si mgeni katika siasa za taifa letu. Anajua kila kitu ugumu na hatari zake. Hivyo, anaposema amejitoa kafala anamaanisha linaloweza kumtokea toka kwa makundi ya wahalifu waliozoea kupata utajiri wa haraka utokanao na kuhujumu na kuidumaza nchi yetu. Pia, anajua mifano mibaya iliyoachwa na waliomtangulia ukiondoa marehemu baba wa taifa Mwl Julius Nyerere aliyeacha rekodi iliyotukuka ya uongozi na utendaji.

            Tokana na hatari na kitisho kinachomkabili rais Magufuli, tunadhani kumuombea pekee hakutoshi. Watanzania, hasa wale wanaoridhishwa na mipango, kasi na utendaji wake, wanapaswa kuwaambia wale wanaopanga kumkwamisha au kumdhuru kuwa ikitokea wakafanikiwa kutekeleza jinai yao, nchi hii haitakalika.

            Kuomba kunaweza kuwa njia ya kumridhisha mhusika na wanaomuombea. Lakini hakuaminiki; ikizingatiwa kuwa hata wanaoteseka, kufa, kufukarishwa na wengine wengi huomba; lakini maombi yao ima huchelewa, hukubaliwa au kukatawaliwa. Tofauti na kumlinda Magufuli, kama wale wanaotaka kumkwamisha au kumdhuru wataelewa madhara ya kufanya hivyo, bila shaka watafikiria mara mbili.  Magufuli hafanyi anayofanya kwa faida binafsi na familia yake. Yeye ni tofauti na wengi waliomtangulia ambao walitanguliza matumbo badala ya utaifa na watu wake. Kimsingi, Magufuli licha ya kuwa tofauti na watangulizi wake watatu, ni suto na kero kwao kutokana na alivyowaumbua. Wengine wapo wapo wakihaha wakijaribu kujinasua na madhambi waliyotenda ikizingatiwa kuwa hadi sasa hawajui kama Magufuli atawalinda au kuwatosa. Anapotoa yake ya moyoni, wengi mioyo inawauma wasijue nini utakuwa mwisho wa matendo yao machafu kwa taifa. Ushahidi uko wazi: wote waliowekwa kwenye mifuko ya wahalifu na matajiri, hawawezi kumpenda wala kumuunga mkono Magufuli. Wanaweza kufanya hivyo hadharani; ingawa nyuma ya pazia hali ni tofauti.

            Kwa vile wahanga wa jinai ya kuacha nchi itafunwe ni watanzania wenyewe–ambao Magufuli anataka kuwakomboa–ni jukumu lao kuhakikisha hadhuriki wala kukwamishwa. Kwani hili likitokea, watakaopata hasara ni watanzania na si Magufuli.

            Kutokana na ukubwa wa tatizo, tunamshauri Magufuli awe anawashughulikia kwanza kabla ya kutangaza nini atafanya. Maana kufanya hivyo, kutawanyima wabaya wake fursa ya kujua anachowapangia. Magufuli anapigana vita kubwa na ya hatari. Hivyo, hapaswi kuweka mipango na mikakati yake wazi; ili maadui zake wasiitumie kumkwamisha au kummaliza.

            Tunaamini watanzania walio wengi ambao walikuwa wamepigika na kuathirika–na bado ni wahanga wa hujuma hii vibaya tokana na utawala mbovu–hawataruhusu kundi dogo la wahalifu liwakwamishe kwa kuwanyang’anya tunu yao. Kama ilitokea kwa Sokoine, basi inapaswa kuwa somo tosha. Tusikubali kuona wahalifu wakiendelea kuweka nchi yetu rehani kwa sababu wana fedha, ushawishi na uroho. Sipendi nionekane namkweza Magufuli. La hasha.Tukimlinganisha na awamu tatu mbovu zilizopita na mateso tuliyopata, si haba; Magufuli ni lulu inayopaswa kutunzwa kwa gharama yoyote.

             Unapotoa madai lazima utoe ushahidi. Awamu ya pili ya Ali Hassan Mwinyi inasifika kwa uholela uliofanywa chini ya kauli mbiu mbovu ya ruksa ambayo, kimsingi, ndiyo mama wa ufisadi unaotuhangaisha kiasi cha rais wetu kujihisi yumo hatarini. Awamu ya tatu chini ya Benjamin Mkapa ilianza vizuri kabla ya kushauriwa vibaya kuhusiana na uwekezaji ulioishia kuwa uchukuaji ambapo hata Mkapa mwenyewe alijichukulia Mgodi wa Makaa ya Mawe wa Kiwira ambao umegeuka kongwa shingoni mwake. Laiti Mkapa angeliona mbali. Magufuli angekuwa anazama kwenye viatu vyake. Awamu ya nne imeonyesha kuwa ya hovyo kuliko zote hasa baada ya rais kugeuka mzururaji akiombaomba huku akiachia raslimali na mali za nchi zikiibiwa na kuvujwa kana kwamba haikuwa ikimhusu. Hakuna sehemu Kiktwe alijikaanga vibaya kama kukiri kuwa ana orodha za wahalifu wote kuanzia mafisadi, wauza unga, majambazi na wala rushwa lakini asikamate hata mmoja; tena bila kutoa sababu wala maelezo. Pia Kikwete anaonekana kuwa mbovu kuliko wote kutokana na kuingia madarakani kwa madai kuwa alitumia fedha ya wizi wa mabilioni ya umma chini ya kashfa ya EPA asikanushe wala kuongelea hata siku moja. Magufuli, tofauti na wote, anasema wazi. “Unapoona watu wanashangaashangaa sana kwa sababu hawakuzoea haya. Na walifikiri nitakuwa part of them (mmoja wao), never (hasha), not me (si mimi). Haya ni maneno mazito ya mtu mwenye uchungu na taifa lake. Lazima tumuunge mkono na kumlinda kwa gharama yoyote. Watu kama hawa hutokea mara moja katika miaka mingi. Ni kama kushinda bahati nasibu.

            Tuhitimishe kwa kuwataka watanzania wasiishie kumuombea rais Magufuli. Wanapaswa kumlinda, kumsaidia, kumkosoa na kumuongoza pale anapozidiwa. Yeye ni binadamu sawa na wao na analikubali hilo kiasi cha kujinyenyekeza kwao huku akishupaa dhidi ya wale wanaotaka kuendelea kuwaibia, kuwadhalilisha na kuwanyanyasa.

Chanzo: Tanzania Daima, leo.

Mugful: Spit Fire on 'em for Boozers' Sake

            Although I burn cannabis, I don’t consume dope of any type; and I’m not a dope like those who rob their own hunks. I must say it clearly from boozer’s point of view: I hate drugs and those dealing in them. Just recently, Boozers in Philippines voted a boozer president in after becoming sick and tired of corrupt politicos in the establishment. I wasn’t interested in Philippine’s politics due to the fact that this hunk is nothing compared to the US where Don Trampling has stolen thunders with his rants and raves. Soon after the new Filipino elect- president Rodrigo Durtete started spiting fire, I found myself caught in Filipino politics. The other day I was watching Durtete especially after attracting international media for his outbursts and originality.  Frankly, I like this dude particularly for his bushido, openness and fearlessness. I like him not because he’s man of braggadocios like Trampling.  No, they bod speaks his minds from his heart without forgetting his mind. He recently issued an edict that left many dazed even before being sworn in.  When he’s explaining how he’s going to deal with drugs he said, “Please feel free to call us, the police, or do it yourself if you have the gun—you have my support.” He’s telling Filipinos how to deal with drug dealers whenever they come across any of them.
            Knowing the danger of these stuffs, I mince no words when it comes to telling Dr Joni Wine Mugful to do the same to our hunk’s drug barons. Send them to purgatory before they send many young boozers to hell. When it comes to actions, Durtete’s a man of another world. Before allowing Filipinos to kill drug dealers, the dude–said during presidential campaigns–that he’ll shoot criminals. This means thus, if Bongolalaland were Philipines, all buggers behind EPA, Kagoda, UDA, Escrow and other mega scandals would be dead meat before Durtete. All those playing games with Dr Mugful by hiding and hiking sugar and other items would have already been in their graves.  I wish Mugful would take a leaf from this dude that doesn’t mince words when it comes to how to fix the hunk.
            Durtete who also is a boozer–to show; he means biz–he seriously added, “If you're still into drugs, I will kill you, don't take this as a joke. I'm not trying to make you laugh, son of a bitch, I will really kill you.” If you listen to this dude, even if you’re drunk, you’ll love him. Guess what. When it comes to sharks and big thieves in the upper echelons of power he’d this to say, “I’ll have you killed.” He said he doesn’t have any problem with small fish such as police officers who solicit bungs simply because they want to feed their families or pay medications for their sick parents. His are all those who steal not just because of the need but greed. In simple parlance, all sharks that are committing crimes in Philippines are committing hara-kiri for their own peril. Had he been in Bongolaland, the guys such mzee wa Vijidola, Lungumingumi, Kiwila Coal Mine’s big thieves, Ni Zero Kadamage Buzwagi, Hal Kitilia,  and other putas who robbed boozers big time would have already added another title of the late so and so. I still can’t just get it: why Mugful is silent on Escrew, UDA and EPA mega scandals among others.
            The other day I heard Dr Mugful complaining that his predecessor left him almost everything ghosty. If it were Durtete, he’d not complain. Instead, he’d have already thrown such a dude in the gaol so that he’d pay for his sins of letting the hunk to run on out pilot while he was globetrotting. Durtete would not appoint any of predecessors to any position or just laugh at them. His is to kill the simians without looking into their faces.
            Durtete is a hard worker like Dr Mugful. Save that the difference’s that Mugful told his nemeses not to play with their lives through sabotaging his government. When it comes to Durtete his is just give them the bullets, simple. He knows; killing criminals especially the sharks makes sense. How many innocent boozers have they already felled thanks to their criminality and greed? Live by sword, die by sword. This is a canon law that’s handed down by God her or himself. You rob boozers. Their govt robs you of your life. Just imagine. What’d you do with criminals such as those who enlisted vihiyos in degree courses or those running fake universities that rip our students off? What’d you do with the criminals that sabotage our infrastructure by constructing substandard roads or those who import expired sugar, fake medicines and other substandard items? Give them the bullet instead of biting the bullet as a hunk.
             Durtete and Mugful share one thing: They all aren’t choreographic dudes. They know no la-di-da, yada yada.
Source: Guardian, today.

Mlevi kutia timu mjengoni na michupa

            Baada ya Ana Makidamakida kuachia ngazi baada ya kuvurunda Njengo, walevi walidhani ubabe mjengoni ungekuwa ndiyo mwisho. Kumbe tulinoa. Hatukujua kuwa atakuja yule ambaye hajaTulia kutembeza undavandava tena kishenzi zaidi ya Makidamakida! Kutokana na upuuzi huu, Kijiwe kimeamua kulaani kwa sana kikiwaunga mkono wahishimiwa wa upingaji kwa kumsusia upuuzi wake.

            Kwa vile mjengo si mali ya gendaeka wala mama yake au murumewe, Mlevi nimeamua kutia timu kule kwenda kutoa somo. Najua washikaji zangu akina Kitwangaji na Mlingaji watanipa tafu. Tutakwenda tuuchape mma na kupaga misokoto kibao ili tufyatuke na kumfyatukia  kama siyo kumfyatua huyu anayehitaji kutulizwa ajue kuwa Mjengoni siyo sehemu ya kufanyia uhuni uchwara wa kubeba chata fulani huku akiwaumiza wapingaji.  We ambaye hujaTulia, unafanya utukutu kwenye mjengo mtukufu siyo? Nitashughulikia hadi upepewe na kutulia kama siyo kuzimia. Hujui kuwa zama za Njaa Kaya za kitwahuti zimeishakuwa historia kwenye kaya hii ya walevi? Wakati wenzio tunakunywa kanywaji na kulewa eti wewe unalewa madaraka siyo? Shame on you!

            Kwanza nashangaa. Huyu babie amesomea sharia gani au PhD yake ni ya kugushi? Haiwezekani wapingaji wawatetee wasomi walioonewa halafu muishiwa anayeitwa msomi atie ngumu. I am going to lunge at the lady without any excuse. Kama ni PhD nami ninayo hata kama ni ya kilevi. Kwanini msomi anashindwa kuelewa somo dogo na utawala bora wa sheria unaotegemea mgawanyo wa madaraka?

            Unapowatimua wawakilishi wa walevi, unakuwa umewatimua walevi ambao kimsingi ndiyo wanaolipa marupurupu yako. Tumechoka na watendaji wanaotutumia badala ya kututumikia. Hivyo basi, simung’unyi wala kuzungusha maneno. Huyu hajaTulia; na apaswa kutulizwa kwa kutumbuliwa; na siyo kupepewa kama yalivyokuwa mazoea chini ya Njaa Kaya aliyefuga kila aina ya ujambazi. Kwani naye ni jipu tena linalonuka. Hatuwezi kuendesha mjengo kwa mapenzi ya watu binafsi badala ya sharia tulizojiwekea. Nawapongeza wapingaji kumsusa kidhabu huyu anayeonyesha ulimbukeni kwenye ofisi ya walevi.

            Kwa vile sisi ni wapenda amani, tunamtumia shinikizo. Asipoomba msamaha na kurejea kwenye mstari, tutamtokea na michupa ya gongo ajue tulivyochukia kichizi. Hata njiwa akishambuliwa anaweza kujitetea pamoja na kusifika kwa upenzi wake wa amani. Nasi kadhalika, tukiendelea kuchokozwa kwa kufukuziwa wawakilishi wetu, tutatia timu mjengoni na patachimbika bila jembe ukiachia mbali kutokalika.

            Huyu bibie kama anataka ukada basi aende makao makuu ya chama na kutafuta ulaji huko lakini si kwenye mjengo ambao ni taasisi inayopaswa kuwa huru na yenye kujitegemea. Inakuwa aibu kuliko hata unavyoweza kueleza kwa mtu kihiyo kutumika. Kwa sasa, kusema ukweli; sioni tofauti ya kihiyo Makidamakida na hyu ambaye hajaTulia. Kwanini hataki kwenda kumuuliza mwenzie Makidamakida jinsi Mlevi alivyomshukia hadi akatia adabu? Au anadhani mlevi ni wa jana kama yeye? Na kama ni kubukua, mlevi si haba; amepiga vitabu tena ughaibuni kwa sana tu. Mbukuzi gani asiyejua kuwa wakati umebadilika au anayeshindwa kusoma alama za nyakati wakati maandishi yake yako bold pale ukutani?

            Kutokana na uhuni na undavandava unaotembezwa mjengoni tena bila sababu ya msingi zaidi ya ujinga na unazi wa kitoto, nitakwenda kule kutoa somo kwa wahishimiwa wasirudie kosa la kukubali muishiwa yeyote wa kuteuliwa kugombea U-microphone au unaibu wake. Muishiwa wa namna hii asiyejua adha na kazi ngumu ya kuwashawishi wapika kura ya kula wakupe ulaji, anaweza kuchukulia nafasi hii kama ya kufanya majaribio kama ilivyotokea hivi karibuni kiasi cha kuniudhi na kunilazimisha kwenda kuweka mambo sawa mjengoni. Kukubali mtu asiyewakilisha yeyote isipokuwa tumbo lake ni kujihujumu hasa ikizingatiwa kuwa muishiwa kama huyu wa sasa hawezi kuwaheshimu wahishimiwa kwa vile yeye si mhishimiwa bali muishiwa hadi akaingia mjengoni kwa kubebwa. Sijui kwanini fyatu Mlingaji hatajamtolea uvivu na kumuita baby ili naye audhike tuone kama ataususa mjengo kama wale walioitwa babies kikawashuka hadi kususa mjengo?

            Kitendo cha kuugeuza mjengo sehemu ya kulindana kivyama ni jambo la kizamani. Ni kinyume na demokrasia hata kama ni ya maigizo na kilevi. Usawa huu utamburuza nani wakati kinachotakiwa ni kujadiliana na kukubali kutokubaliana? Upuuzi unazidi kuchusha, kuudhi na kutapisha sana hasa unapofanywa na yule anayeitwa mbukuzi. Heri kihiyo anayefanya ukihiyo wake kuliko mbukuzi anayefanya ukihiyo kama kihiyo. Mbukuzi anayefanya ukihiyo ni kihiyo hata angeitwa daktari au porofwesa kama akina J4 Majembe na Shcool Kawa-dog walioua elimu. Huyu hana tofauti na Dokta Kamanda wa Zenj zama zile akitembeza undavandava asijue kila jambo lina mwisho. Huyu hana tofauti na akina Profwesa Anae Kajuamlo aliyeingizwa mkenge na tapeli la Escrew. Wala hana tofauti na maprofesa waganga wa kienyeji na matapeli wengine wanaojiita madaktari wakati udaktari wao ni wa kughushi kama akina Emmy Nchimvi, Merry Nyagu, Makorongo Muhanga, Diddie Makalio aka Masssaburiii, Dororos Kamara na wengine wengi waliotuhumiwa kughushi Njaa Kaya akawanusuru kwa ukihiyo wake.

            Namalizia kwa kumuonya huyu dogo asingoje nimshughulikie hadi apepewe ili atulie. Awaheshimu wahishimiwa walioko mjengoni kwa kutumwa na walevi. Message sent.

Chanzo: Nipashe.

Hiyo ndiyo gusagusa bendi yetu

Kijiwe chamshangaa Tuliya

            Baada ya kushuhudia ubabe wa kizamani uliotokea Mjengoni ambako wawakilishi wa wachovu walitolewa mkuku–kisa kudai haki za watoto wao walioingizwa mjini na watu wenye tamaa–Kijiwe leo kinakaa kulaani ubabe na ubazazi huu uliotembezwa na muishiwa mmoja tena asiyemwakilisha yeyote zaidi ya yule aliyempa ulaji. Tunawaunga mkono kwa dhati wahishimiwa wa upingaji walioamua kumsusa. Kwani matendo yake yananuka kiasi cha kumfanya awe jipu linalonuka hakuna mfano.

            Mijjinga anaingia akiwa na gazeti la Danganyika Daima. Analibwaga mezani huku akijifuta kijasho tokana na kusulubiwa na kijua cha asubuhi na moshi wa ngwalangwala zilizojazana kwenye barabara za Dar si Salama. Mchunguliaji analinyaka na kuanza kulidurusu.

            Anakohoa kidogo na kuronga, “Wazee mmemsikia huyu baby dogo wa Mjengoni aliyewatimua wawakilishi wa upingaji kwa sababu ya kutimiza wajibu wao? Je tumeondoa Makidamakida na kuleta asiyeTulia kuendeleza mchezo ule ule wa kubeba chama cha Mafwisadi?  Nataka leo tupitishe azimio la kumtokea na kumtia adabu ili aache utukutu kwenye mjengo mtukufu.”

            “We ulidhani kulikuwa na mabadiliko mjengoni usawa huu chini ya Jobless Nduguy aliyekuwa naibu wa Makidamakida akishiriki kikikombe kimoja? Naona afya ya Nduguy imekuwa ugogoro kiasi cha kuachia kila kitu kwa huyu dogo asiyeTulia. Ubaya ni kwamba hawatutangazie kuwa jamaa anauma utadhani kuumwa siyo sifa ya ngurumbili!” anajibu Kapende kwa kuulizwa swali.

            Mpemba anakula mic, “Yakhe hata mie wala sioni hayo mabadiliko wallahi. Kama yapo ni ya kuwa na rahis Kanywaji lakini si zaidi ya hapo. Naya anaanza kunshangaza kuvumilia majipu kama haya. Huyu bibie asipotulia atajatumbuliwa aambue kujilaumu kama yule Kitwangaji alotwanga mma akaishia kutwanga karata na mapema hata kabla hajafaidi. Anshangaza sana kukataa kutambua kuwa vihiyo waloingizwa vyuoni walitapeliwa; hivo kuwafukuza bila kuwashughulikia walowatapeli na kuongeza adha wallahi.”

            Mipawa anakamua mic, “Kweli kaya yetu imekula hasara hasa Mjengoni. Watu wanakuja na hoja za haja halafu gendaeka mmoja anawanyima fursa kana kwamba mjengo ni mali yake. Nani alidhani baby huyu anayedaiwa mbukuzi angefanya mambo kama kihiyo Anae Makidamakida? Ama kweli kambale wote wana sharubu; na ukishangaa na Makidamakida utaona ya Tulie! Alipoteuliwa na kuchaguliwa tukaambiwa ni daktari mwenzetu, tulikosea kudhani ataleta mapinduzi tusijue naye kidampa tu kama waliomtangulia anayetumika kinepi.”

            Mgosi Machungi anakula mic, “Sisi tiisema mkadhani ni unazi. Kusema ue ukwei, mimi sitegemei chochote toka nambai wani. Hawa jamaa ni majipu mbee na nyuma. Mimi sishangai kuona msomi huyu akifanya madudu; kwani hii ni jadi yao. Hata tofauti na vihiyo waiokuwa wameingizwa vyuoni wakati ni divisheni fei. Hukuona wasomi kama akina J4 Majembe na Shukuuni Kawa-dog waivyoua eimu wakati tiiambiwa wameeimika? Huyu wa Tuia anaweza kuwa na jipya gani wakati ni wae wae waiopata eimu kwa mazabe?”

            Mbwamwitu anakwanyua mic, “Huenda naye baby hasa ikizingatiwa kuwa hakuingia kwenye debe kupata huo uishiwa wake anaoutumia vibaya asijue una mwisho. Ni suala la kawaida kwa waliopata ulaji bila kura ya kula kujiona wao ndiyo wao wakati si chochote si lolote. Najua naye anaogelea kwenye mwamba. Siku atakapopiga mbizi kwishnei kazi yake. Yuko wapi Makidamakida aliyecheza makida akatembeza undava akaishia kukitoa kama Ben Makapi mzee wa nyodo? Nimependa ya wapingaji kuamua kumsusia upuuzi wake. Laiti magamba yasingekuwa na tabia ya kulindana, huyu bibie angetolewa mkuku tena haraka sana.”

            Msomi Mkatatamaa anatia guu, “Hata mimi nashangaa daktari mwenzetu kufanya mambo kama kihiyo; au naye kihiyo aliyefika hapo kwa kubebwabebwa? Haiwezekani mtu aliyesomea sharia akaivunja na kushindwa kuielewa. Sijui kwanini hakutaka kujua kuwa wahishimiwa wapingaji si watoto wake wala washikaji zake akaepuka kujivua nguo. Nadhani huyu naye anapaswa kuchunguzwa alivyopata nondo yake. Huyu ni jipu tena linalonuka. Anatutia aibu sisi wenye PhD za ukweli kusema ule ukweli. I don’t get it how an educated person of this caliber would commit such buffoonery. If she doesn’t change, I’ll lunge her one day.”

            Mzee Maneno anakula mic, “Msomi umechukia hadi kuongea kikameruni kigumu na kuniacha nje ya mjadala. Wakati mwingine tafadhali usichukie na kuangusha kimombo kigumu hivi. Sasa hiyo bafuni inaingiaje mjengoni au bi mkubwa alitoka bafuni ndiyo akawatimua wapingaji?

            Kijiwe hakina mbavu kwa namna mzee Maneno alivyopotea maboya tokana na kutokimanya kimombo.

            Sofia Lion aka Kanungaembe anakula mic, “Huyu mwananke mwenzetu ametuaibisha kuliko hata aliyemtangulia aliyesahau kuwa u-microphone ilikuwa ni wadhifa wa muda tu. Juzi nimeona dokta Kanywaji kamtoa kwenye mawe kwa kumpa ulaji. Hapa ndipo nakubaliana aliyesema kuwa kambale wote wana sharubu. Kwa alivyovurunda, nani alitegemea angepewa wadhifa wowote kwenye ofisi ya umma? Hapa ndipo nashindwa kumuelewa dokta Kanywaji. Kwani huyu mdada naye ni jipu sawa na huyu anayepaswa kutulizwa akaTulia na usomi wake uchwara.”

            Kapende anarejea, “Juzi mmemsikia Dokta Kanywaji akimuita mwenzie jipu akisema kuwa alimuachia kila kitu hewa? Sijui kwanini hamtumbui hasa ikizingatiwa kuwa yeye ndiye alikuwa mwanzilishi na muhimili wa uchafu huu unaotuhangaisha wachovu? Ukimuona jamaa anavyokenua utadhani kavaa nguo wakati yuko uchi.”

            Kanji anakula mic, “Hii toto naona naleta toto kwa Jengoni. Kama wakilishi ya chovu nasema yeye napaswa sikiliza na ongoza jadala. Sasa kama nataka kila hesimiwa sema yeye nataka basi andika kwa karatasini iwape bunge iseme hiyo nataka sikia ifurahise yeye.”

            Kijiwe kilipokuwa ndiyo chanoga si likapita shumbwengu la Tulie. Acha tulitoe mkuku ili kumtuliza kabla hajatumbuliwa.

Chanzo: Tanzania Daima.

Tunajitahidi kufaidi Summer kabla mambo hayajaharibika

Mgogoro wa Visiwani: Mrema haisaii Tanzania

            Hakuna kitu kibaya kama kuishiwa. Mtu aliyeishiwa hana tofauti na mtu aliyechanganyikiwa hasa kama hakubali kuwa ameishiwa. Hivi karibuni mwenyekiti Tanzania Labour Party (TLP), Augustine Mrema, aliwaacha wengi hoi kama si kuwaudhi alipojigeuza jaji kiasic ha kumtuhumu Katibu mkuu wa Chama cha Wananachi (CUF), Maalim Seif Sharrif Hamad, kuwa ni mhaini bila kujua hata ukubwa wa tuhuma kama hizo.

Mrema aliitisha mkutano wa waandishi wa habari na kujivua nguo. Hata hivyo, kutokana na hali yake kiafya, kuna uwezekano; uwezo wake wa kufikiri unazidi kumtupa mkono. Pia, tokana na elimu yake kiduchu, Mrema ameonyesha wazi kuwa hata hiyo shahada aliyodai aliipata Marekani ni feki; na inapaswa kuchunguzwa; ili ikiwezekana atumbuliwe sawa na wengine walioghushi sifa na vyeti vya kitaaluma. Kama Mrema angejua uzito na athari za madai yake, wala asingejivua nguo. Ina maana yeye ndiye anajua sheria kuliko mamlaka zote za Tanzania ambaye ameuona “uhaini” wa Seif ambao serikali imeshindwa kuuona? Kama ni mhaini, kwanini hakamatwi na kufunguliwa mashtaka? Jamani, hata kama ni kutetea mtu au ulaji, angalau wanaofanya hivyo watumia japo akili lau kidogo tu. Hata unapotaka kumnasa samaki, angalau, huweka kitu kidogo kwenye chambo. Kwanini Mrema anataka kupaka rangi upepo au kutaka kuung’ao mbuyu kwa kijiko?

Mrema alimtuhumu Seif kuwa ni mbinafsi bila kujua kuwa naye alichokuwa akifanya pale licha ya kuwa ubinafsi wa kujipendekeza ili akumbukwe lau kwa cheo ni kujidhalilisha na kuchochea vurugu; sijui ili apate nini? Kwanini Mrema hakubali kuwa kwake game is up; na akajiuguze aone mwisho wa hali yake? Pia, Mrema alimtuhumu Seif kuwa anautaka urais kwa gharama yoyote; hata kama ni kwa njia ya kumwaga damu. Madai ya ajabu, hovyo na uongo wa wazi wazi.  Inaonekana Mrema hana kumbukumbu tena ya jana tu? Sijui ni kwa kukosa kumbukumbu au makusudi mazima Mrema alishindwa kukumbuka kuwa ni maalim Seif huyu huyu aliyewahamasisha wazanzibari wasifanye fujo tena wengi wa wafuasi wake walipokuwa tayari kuingia mitaani kuitangazia dunia kuwa wamedhulumiwa! Sijui kwanini Mrema hakumbuki kuwa ni Seif huyu huyu–anayemzushia ubinafsi, uhaini na uroho wa madaraka bila kutoa ushahidi–ndiye aliyekutana na rais John Pombe Magufuli ikulu na kumhakikishia kuwa hataunga mkono vurugu. Je huo umwagaji damu anaoongelea Mrema ni upi?

Ajabu ya maajabu ni madai ya Mrema kuwa aliyopayuka yalitokana na uzoefu wake wa kuwa waziri wa mambo ya Ndani wa muda mrefu bila kutaja huo muda mrefu ni miaka mingapi na kwa vigezo vipi? Kwani uwaziri wake wa Mambo ya Ndani ni taaluma? Kwanini Mrema hataki kuwa mkweli kwake binafsi na umma kuwa anasumbuliwa na kusukumwa na njaa kiasi cha kujipendekeza kwa rais Magufuli ili lau amkumbuke kwa cheo lau agangie njaa kali inayomkabili? Ama kweli wahenga walisema; adui yako muombee njaa na mwenye njaa kweli hana miiko.  Pia, hili la kutaka apewe lau ubunge wa kuteuliwa nalo linapaswa liangaliwe vilivyo na kwa makini hasa ikizingatiwa hali ya kiafya ya Mrema. Hivi Mrema anadhani Magufuli ni mtu wa kutapeliwa kirahisi hivyo; abugi step amteue mtu ambaye anapaswa kutumia muda uliobaki kujiuguza? Hata kutoka kwenye mkutano wenyewe alikorushia makombora yake alitoka akiwa ameshikiliwa kuonyesha asivyo timamu kiafya. Hivi kwa udhaifu wa kiafya alio nao Mrema, anaweza kufanya kazi gani zaidi ya kutaka ateuliwe ale dezo jambo ambalo nalo ni ubinafsi, ufisadi, upotezaji fursa na matumizi ya fedha za umma ukiachia mbali kuwa ujipu ambao Magufuli akiufanya atakuwa anajipiga mtama? Tunamshauri Seif na Magufuli wampuuzie Mrema. Kwani, inavyoonekana, anataka afe na mtu. Hebu tuwe wakweli kidogo. Unawezaje kumteua mgonjwa; au Mrema anajigonga ili aendelee kugharimiwa matibabu India?

Kwanini Mrema–kama kweli si mbinafsi tena wa kunuka–anaamua kuwapakazia wengine ndiyo apate mradi wake? Kama tukiwa wakweli, kuna mwanasiasa mbinafsi Tanzania kama Mrema ambaye kila alipohamia aliua vyama kwa sababu ya ubinafsi na ukosefu wa usomi na busara na uzalendo? Kwanini Mrema anataka kuwageuza watanzania majuha na wasio na kumbukumbu kiasi hiki; wakati wanajua historia yake iliyojaa ubinafsi, ujanja ujanja, utatanishi ukiachia mbali uchu wa madaraka? Kama Mrema amepoteza kumbukumbu, basi asidhani watanzania wote wamepoteza kumbukumbu kama yeye. Mgogoro wa matokeo ya uchaguzi wa Visiwani si wa kufanyia usanii wala kugangia njaa. Wengi walidhani; Mrema angewahimiza wahusika wakae kwenye meza ya mduara. Bahati mbaya sana, tena sana, Mrema anaonekana kumwaga mafuta kwenye moto. Hata hivyo, kutokana na kuishiwa kwake, sijui kama Seif atapoteza muda kumjibu hasa ikizingatiwa kuwa hamna hoja ya msingi ya kujibu; ukiachia mbali kutaka umaarufu kupitia mgongoni mwake na UKAWA. Je anadhani watanzania wamemsahau Mrema muungu mtu aliyetaka kila tatizo la kitaifa litatuliwe kijijini kwake Kiraracha? Nani hamkumbuki Mrema mpenda makuu? Kama Mrema anataka kurejea CCM, si arejee tu badala ya kuanza kutafuta kuwachafua wenzake? Kwanini Mrema amejigeuza mpinzani wa wapinzani na kwa faida ya nani?

Ni bahati mbaya kuwa Mrema hakutoa hata suluhisho wala m change kwenye tatizo zaidi ya tuhuma za uongo ambazo alishindwa hata kuzithibitisha achia mbali kushindwa kujenga hata hoja. Amekuwa tatizo badala ya kuwa jawabu.

Tuhitimishe kwa kumuuliza Mrema kwanini anashindwa kuwa refa mzuri kwa kuangalia mapungufu ya pande zote? Au ni ile hali ya kuwa njaa inapopanda kichwani basi hubongo huacha kutumika na badala yake utumbo hutumika?

Chanzo: Tanzania Daima.

Boycott everything Hindi boozers

            Boozer’s one incurable weakness; he doesn’t know how to sugarcoat anything. He speaks things other fear and hate to take on. This is one of such things. When racist Indians attacked African in February this year–after a Bongolaland girl’s beaten up, mobbed, stripped and violated simply because a Sudanese drive knocked down an Indian woman–they wrongly thought they’d get away with murder. They faultily thought Africans are good at nothing but forgetting and forgiving just the same way they’ve always evidenced apartheid amidst in the form of caste system among themselves without taking any decisive actions. It seems; things have changed albeit. According to the Kenyan Daily Nation (May 25, 2015), African envoys to India decided to rekindle the fire that may see India lose its magic. They decided to say enough is enough so as to advise their countries to stop sending students to India for the fear of being discriminated against or being killed. They think; the number of those that have already been killed is enough. The paper quoted Kenya’s High Commissioner to India, Florence Weche as saying, “Given the pervading climate of fear and insecurity in India, the African heads of missions are left with little option than to consider recommending to their governments not to send new students to India unless and until their safety can be guaranteed.” Boozers, too, have left with no option except stating that it is enough. African countries should categorically boycott everything Indian. Essentially, boozers have nothing to lose except their disgrace given that whatever they need from India can be supplied by China. If need be, they’d reconsider denying citizenship to Hindis. After all, even the education that’s warranting the killing of our brethren is arguably and comparatively wanting just like most of the goods they buy from there. Boozers think: those the colonial monsters brought to exploit them are enough; and must be viewed with suspicion due to the fact that they, too, are stinking racists. Refer to how they don’t intermarry with them; or share even religion with them. If there’s the religion the former shares with the latter’s nothing but monkey biz whose god is dosh.

            Again, boozers concur with their envoys. They know too well; this is not the fear of the unknown. It is real; and needs equal reciprocity. Boozers say it openly without mincing words that they’ve nothing to lose given that since these guys were brought by British brutish colonial monsters many decades ago have boycotted them; and discriminated against them except for their toil and products so to speak. Foolishly though, boozers allowed them to get away with murder while what they’ve always done is apartheid that’s traceable to their caste system. Yet, the world is calling them the biggest democracy! How so with such a stinking racist system and culture! Boozers–I don’t know if it is because of being rash, stoned or nifty–to say that colonial monsters exported their apartheid even to Africa today where they live in their cocoons under the pretext of religion. Try to take on them. All stupid boozers will be on you condemning while they’ve always been discriminated against systematically. Who’s fooling whom hither guys? It seems; boozers have awakened up from their anesthetic slumber so as to learn from Hindis and become racists themselves. Again, if you ask them; why they’re pondering on replicating the same sin; they just say that tit is always for tat; and their justice is a tooth for a tooth the same way foreign religions teach them. What’s wrong to fly a fish with its own fat? Why boozers become fair game but when they think about–forget about doing the same–are intimidated and condemned? Honestly, I don’t support retributive justice otherwise if those committing the sin first; and play better than thou, so be it. I hate racism be it by Hindis, Zungus or Swahilis. Racism is racism; there’s no good or humane racism. We need to fight it left and right by treating each other equally and equitably. I wish I’d get a Hindi girl to make a wife if racism would not have been an issue.

            Boozers seem hell-bent to emancipate themselves as they assert their presence especially in Africa. They say that Africa needs to reciprocate by sending Hindis back if they don’t change; or start watching them closely wherever they’re so that they can stop discriminating against them at home and abroad. Ironically, even those guys that colonial monsters brought and left in Africa are still discriminating against boozers despite allowing them to keep on exploiting them something colonial monsters brought them to do. Tit for tat; the govt of Hindis must be told to its face that boozers know everything. So too, it’d be shunned up till it abandons its caste apartheid that it’s always perpetrated against people with the so-called black colour be they Hindis or Swahilis.

Source: Guardian.

Tujikumbushe alikotokea Mohamed Ali marehemu

Mlevi kumlinda Makufuli

            Naona yule anacheka na kutikisa kichwa hata kabla ya kusoma habari nzima. Usitoe hukumu kwa kusoma kichwa cha habari tu. Don’t judge a book based on the cover dude.  Naona yule anasonya akidhani bangi na ulevi sasa vinafikisha pabaya. Kwa taarifa yenu leo sijapata mma wala msokoto. Ndiyo nimeamka toka kitandani ambako niliyofanya usiku hayawahusu. Kwa ufupi mimi ni sober and normal sane na kamili.

            Baada ya rais Joni Kanywaji Makomeo kuwa analalamika juu ya hatihati ya maisha yake tokana na wale anaowatumbua majipu kutaka kumdhuru, Mlevi nimejitoa nikiwa na akili zangu timamu, bila kutarajia malipo yoyote wala ujiko na bila kushawishiwa na ngurumbili yoyote kujitoa mhanga kumlinda rais Kanywaji. 

            Kwanza si vibaya kugusia kidogo juu ya sifa zangu. Nina mkanda wa juu wa karate, gojolyuu na jet kune doo na madudu mengine magumu. Pia nimefanya kozi ya ukomando kwenye kaya ambayo ni top secret kutaja. Ni mlenga shabaha ambaye hajawahi kutokea duniani. Pia nimesomea intelligence, ushushuu na madude mengine ambayo si busara kuyataja dunia nzima. Nina PhD kama kumi kwenye masuala ya ulinzi na usalama bila kusahau ulevi.

            Tukiachana na maujiko yangu kwenye madude magumu kuelewa, ngoja twende kwenye mada yenyewe. Rafiki yangu mmoja shushuu amenitonya kuwa kuna gendaeka wenye mipango na nia mbaya wanataka kumfanyia kitu mbaya rais wetu. Ila inaonekana wamesahau kitu kimoja;mabo yamebadilika sana. Bongo ya sasa si ya 1984 alipouawa Eddy Morning Sokoine. This time, these putas and buggers should think twice; and they got it terribly wrong. Walevi hawako tayari kupata hasara nyingine baada ya hii ya Sokoine. Wamenituma niseme bila kumung’unya maneno kuwa atakayemdhuru kipenzi na mkombozi wao Mtumbua Majipu ajue hatafanikiwa. Patachimbika bila jembe; na patakuwa hapatoshi.

            Walevi wamechoka kuona kaya yao ikigeuzwa kichwa cha mwendawazimu na shamba la chizi. Hivyo, wale waliozoea vya kunyonga wajiandalie vya kuchinja. Walevi watachinja yoyote atakayemdhulu kamanda wao wa kupambana na ufisadi kwa njia ya kutumbua mapunye, vipele na majipu.  Kama wewe ni jipu jiandae kutumbuliwa lakini si zaidi ya hapo. Wale waliozoea kujiona wapo juu ya sheria wamechelewa. Wale waliozoea kutumia ofisi za umma kama maduka yao, wamepotea. Wale waliozooea kuugeuza urais urahis, walaaniwe na kutumbuliwa. Wale waliozoea kufanya mambo kwa mazoea, washike adabu na adabu iwashike. Uchangu wa kisiasa mwisho wake ni kwa Dokta Kanywaji.

            Tofauti na waganganjaa na matapeli wanaotaka kumtumia Dk Kanywaji kwa maneno na maombi na matunguli, Mlevi hana muda huo wa kutafuta ulaji na ujiko wakati hakuna lolote. Wengi wanaodai wanataka kumuombea Dk Kanywaji wana dhambi kasi kwamba hata sheitwan mwenyewe hawataki. Wengi wao wanahitaji maombi. Wao wametoa urongo wao. Yeye ametoa mwili, roho na damu yake kuhakikisha anasimama bega kwa began a Dk Kanywaji ili kufanikisha ukombozi wa walevi. Walevi hawana dini. Hawaendi kwa vigagula wala hawabembelezi wala kuzuga kama matapeli wa maombi. Wao hufanya kweli. Tunachukua michupa yetu na kwenda kumshughulikia yoyote tunayehisi anataka kumdhuru Dk Kanywaji. Usiombe kukosana na wavuta bangi tena wanaokula kitu inaitwa gongo. Hawaogopi hata ndata wala vigagula wala hawatapeliwi na yoyote isipokuwa mama mwenye baa. Wakiamua wanakuja na kumaliza udhia bila kujali yatakayofuatia.

            Acha nitumie fursa hii kumwambia Dk Kanywaji kuwa asihofu kitu; walevi tuko nyuma yake. Ila asiulize ili tumfanye nini. Tuko nyuma yake kumlinda dhidi ya washenzi wanaotaka kumkwamisha. Tutawakwamisha na kuhakikisha hapakaliki. Tunamwambia kwa kinywa kipana kuwa aendelee kutumbua majipu usiku na mchana wala bila wasiwasi wala kuangalia ukubwa wa majipu. Hata yale majipu yaliko chamani au kwenye serikali yake asiyaache. Hata yale yanayojipeleka ikulu mara kwa mara kutaka kumzuga ayatumbue. Hapa ni kazi tu; kutumbua majipu. Muhimu, asitumbue walevi. Maana, walevi si tishio kwa usalama wala ustawi wa kaya zaidi ya kaya zao.

            Kabla ya kusahau, tumkumbushe Dk Kanywaji. Akitaka kuondoa mzizi wa fitina, aangalie pale alipoanzia na wale waliomalizia pale. Asiangalie nyani usoni wala kuangalia ukubwa wala umaarufu wa nyani husika. wala asijali vicheko na mikenuo ya nyani wahusika wala ushawishi wa kujifanya wanamchekea wakati wangetaka wacheke kwenye matanga yake. Take on them without looking into their faces. Look into their eyes and tell them; this is it. Mlifanya ushenzi mliofanya; lazima malipo yawe hapa hapa kayani na duniani au vipi?

            Leo sitachonga wala kuzoza sana. Nakwenda kupiga tizi ili niwahi ikulu kuanza kumlinda Dk Kanywaji. Pia natoa taarifa rasim; wote mnaokula njama kumhujumu Dk Kanywaji–kama alivyoonya hivi karibuni kule Katesh–mnacheza na maisha yenu. Heri Mlevi kunyotoka roho akimlinda mkombozi wao kuliko kungoja wamhujumu halafu wawadedishe walevi kwa dhiki na ufukarishwaji, ukapa, ukwete na umwinyi. Message sent.

            Ombi; kwa wale wote wenye nia nzuri wanaotaka kumlinda Dk Kanywaji tukutane kwa Mfuga dog kwenye Dojo langu kuanza mazoezi ya kujichua tayari kuanza kumlinda mkombozi wa walevi mwana wa mlevi aliyempa jina la Kanywaji. See you then and thither guys.

Chanzo: Tanzania Daima.

Kijiwe chalaani akina Mkamia

            Baada ya muishiwa mmoja aliyewahi kutishia usalama wa uhuru wa vyombo habari kujipayukia akidai wapingaji wana sura mbaya wakati naye msura wake ni huo huo kama ubaya ubaya, kijiwe kimeamua kuja kulaani.

Jamaa huyu aiwaye Jumaaa Mkamia alitoa mpya aliposema, “Sasa nyie mnaoshangilia humu mna sura mbaya na mnatamani kutapika.” Kijiwe kinashangaa mambo ya ubaya na uzuri wa sura yanatafuta nini mjengoni! Kinazidi kukshangaa kwanini njengo umegeuzwa kituo cha daladala bila sababu nuzuhu.

            Mgosi Machungi analianzisha, “Wagosi, mnaona hii picha ya jamaa mwenye sua nzui hii hapa toto la kiangi? Wenye kutaka kuwowa jiandaeni mkakague sua. Hao hao!”

            Mpemba anamchomekea Mgosi akisema, “Wallahi acha nkuchomekee kabla hujamaliza utamu. Wallahi hili toto la kilangi mie lankata kusema ule ukweli. Sijui si mtoto riziki wala sina habari mie. Maana ukisikiliza anosema ushangaa ulijali wake wallahi. Mambo ya uzuri wa sura na mwanaume wapi na wapi yakhe!”

            Mijjinga anakula mic, “Mie simshangai huyu jamaa tangu akiwa waziri mdogo kwenye uhabithi uliopita hasa matamko yake ya kutumia masaburi badala ya kichwa. Hii si mara ya kwanza kulianzisha huyu jamaa. Nadhani tusimlaumu bali wazazi wake waliomlea vibaya. Sasa tazama anawaadhiri ukiachia mbali chata lake.”

            Kapende anakatua mic, “ Hata waliomchagua imekula kwao. Bahati yake ni kwamba wengi hawajui mambo yake. Maana wakiyajua mbona hata huo uishiwa atavuliwa asivyo na maadili hata kidogo. Kama anasema wapingaji wana sura nzuri ana matatizo. Sijui kwanini amesahau hata maneno ya baba wa taifa alipoulizwa swali la kijinga kuhusu kinyago chake cha mpapure alipokuwa akipanga kukizungusha kayani mwaka 1995.”

            Kabla ya Kapende kuendelea, Mipawa ananyakua mic, “Huyu mkumbaff anayesema wapingaji wana sura mbaya kwani tunatafuta wachumba njengoni au kuna kiti chamwasha kama si kuwa mtoto si riziki hasa ikizingatiwa kuwa siku hizi watu wanaigizi upuuzi huu na kujiona wameendelea. Si atangaze kama akina anti nanihii ili tumjue?”

            Msomi Mkatatamaa ankula mic, “Mie simlaumu huyu Mkamua sorry Mkamia. Kwanza, tukumbuke kuwa mjengo ulijifia zamani pale ulipogeuzwa uwanja wa mipasho na wavuta bangi kutumia kiswangilish na lugha nyingine za kihuni. Hamkumsikia yule muishiwa fyatu aliyewapa vipande vyao waishiwa wa dezo kuwa ni ma-mababies wakaamua kumjia juu wakati kuna ukweli ndani ya madai haya?  Ukiondoa hawa wanaoambiwa wana sura mbaya, kwangu mjengo hauna tofauti na kituo cha daladala cha Mwenge zama zile. Wamejaa wahuni wanaopaswa kuwa wapiga debe au majogoo lakini si waishiwa.”

            Sofia Lion Kanungaembe anakula mic, “Huyu kaka ameingiliwa na nini yarabi! Mbona huko nyuma hakuwa hivi? Analeta uzuri mjengoni asijue wanaweza kumtafsiri vibaya kuwa ana anachotafuta? Kuna haja ya kuwaambia wakubwa zake wamwajibishe na si kumkingia kifua kama bi mdogo Microphone alivyofanya alipoombwa mwongozo wa kutaka kumshughulikia kidhabu huyu.”
            “Audhubillahi Miina ashetwain rajiim huyu nsen… alipaswa  tolewa ukumbini. Huyu sioni tofauti bainaye na yule Mlemavu nilonsikia juzi akitaka mdandia maalim Seif asijue ule nlima. Waishiwa vibaya hawa. Kama yeye ntoto wa ntu na ana sura nzuri si atulie afaidi hiyo sura yake na vitu vyake yakhe?  Ukiwa na sura nzuri shurti uolewe. Si yeye na wanio na sura nzuri aache njengo wetu wende olewa au jiuza Ohio?” analaamika Mpemba huku akibusu kombe lake la gahawa.

            Kanji naye hajivungi, “Veve hapana chukia kama mimi. Ile mimi sikia ile tusi tamani ile toto pelekwe Bombei. Kana napenda hiyo kitu naenda Bombei tauzwa arabuni. Kama nafika arabuni naolewa kabisa bila ficha nacheva veve na watu ya arabuni!”

            Mheshimiwa Bwege naye anaamua kutia guu, “Kanji kwa mara ya kwanza umenivutia sana.”

            Kabla ya kuendelea Mbwamwitu anachomekea, “Wewe! Amekuvitia vipi mbona sikuelewielewi Mheshimiwa? Eti Kanji amekuvutia.!”

Kanji anajitetea, “Veve acha changanya jambo. Mimi hapana vutia kama hii Kamia na sura zuri. Navutia na neno zuri.”

            “Ehee! Kumbe hata maneno matamu Kanji unayo! Kweli dunia imefika mbali! Nimevutiwa na maneno yako” Anachomekea Mbwamiwtu.

            Mheshimiwa Bwege anaendelea, “Jamani, msigeuze kijiwe kama mjengo wa mipasho. Mie wallaaahi simaanishi mambo ya Mkamia kuhusiana na kuvutiwa na Kanji. Amenivutia kwa kuliona tatizo kama lilivyo na ushauri wake wa kumtaka Mkamia asipate shida wakati watu kama yeye wanaweza kutumika arabuni tena bila ya kulazimika kuwatukana wenzao. Hata kama ana sura nzuri, kwani sura yaliwa na kama alivosema Dk Kapende, kwani tunatafuta nchumba mjengoni au hoja?”

            Msomi anarejea, “Mie simkamii wala kumlaumu huyu Mkamiwa. Nalaumu mfumo mbovu wa nambari wani kujaza wahuni mjengoni wasijue wataumbuka. Ukiangalia walivyotamalaki wahuni mjengoni utashangaa tunawkenda wapi. Kuna haja ya kumwambia dokta Kanywaji ayatumbue haya majipu. Nawaonea huruma walipoteza kura zao kuchagua mtoto kama huyu anayekwenda mjengoni kuuza uzuri badala ya kujenga hoja kwa ajili ya maendeleo ya wale waliomkopesha kura.”

            Kijiwe kikiwa kinango si likapita shangingi la mtoto mzuri mzuri tuliyeNkamia. Kama si dereva wake kuchanganya wese huenda sasa ashaozeshwa hadharani tena ndoa ya nkeka!

Chanzo: Tanzania Daima.